Time Will Reveal
by BloomingDahlia16
Summary: Kit Ruskova always knew this year would be different, but she never could have expected how drastically her life would change. The Dark Lord was after her family, her cousin was in England for good and James was starting to look at her funny. Kit's attempt to navigate the school year and her complicated feelings towards a certain Chaser amidst a brewing war. JP/OC MWPP Complete
1. Chapter 1

A pair of hands hovered over the sleeping girl, her short hair spread out into a brown halo around her head. Another pair joined the first and the two boys locked eyes with a grin. The girl muttered and tossed in her sleep, unaware of the plotting going on above her head. She should have been smarter that this, sleeping in on the day before school, but Kit had had a late night thanks to the boys standing by her now. James smirked down at the petite girl before nodding at Sirius. It was tradition after all. In unison, they each grabbed a leg and tugged Kit from her bed. Her eyes flew open and an unearthly shriek came from her lips and she landed on her floor. When she opened her mouth to yell at the two boys, Sirius held a hand up.

"It's tradition. You never go against Marauder traditions." His eyes bulged a moment later when a heavy Charms textbook collided with his gut.

"Think of this as a new tradition." Kit huffed before turning to James. He looked around for an escape, but the door had slammed shut. Kit could hear laughing from the other side and recognized it as Peter's. She'd thank him for that later, but for now her attention was focused on James Potter. She took a breath before charging at him, arms wrapping around his middle. The two went flying into her bookcase and she slammed a fist into his gut.

"You're much to violent for a lady," James wheezed as he held his stomach.

"I blame you for that. You taught me how to throw a punch." Kit rubbed her sore hand and looked at James' stomach. "What have you got under there, bricks?"

"Careful," Sirius warned. "You'll make his head big."

"I didn't know it could get any bigger," James smacked her head for the comment and ducked before she could retaliate. "Now, scoot. I have to shower."

James and Sirius pouted at her. "Can't we stay for that?"

Kit spun, amazed to hear that from Potter's mouth. "I would have expected that from Pads, but really?" She fixed James with a sad look and as she passed Sirius on her way to the bathroom, she said, "Merlin, you're rubbing off on him." She rolled her eyes at the pair of them and locked the door behind her. She had her own bathroom attached to her bedroom, something she was grateful for given how often she had the guys over at her house. Turning the water on, she could mentally see everyone in her kitchen. Peter would be eating whatever the elves had made, Remus would be sitting at the table, drinking his tea. James and Sirius would amble down the stairs, grab something hot off of the stove and shove it into their mouths without chewing before gorging themselves on whatever else they could find in her house. Luckily, she knew Remus would save her something.

Kit stepped into the steamy shower and realized that this was a big year for her at Hogwarts. Her sixth year at the famous school, she'd already made a name for herself. She was the only girl to be considered a Marauder and that had been by complete chance. Nine years ago when her family had moved to England from Moscow, they moved in down the block from the Potters. They were a lovely family and seven year old James had introduced himself to Katherine by shoving her into a puddle of mud. Instead of crying like most other girls, she stood and pushed him right back. Needless to say, their friendship was a concrete one.

She'd met Sirius only a few weeks later, at a dinner for all the rich, pureblood families. Of course, Kit had just seen it as a night of torture since she'd been forced into a flouncy dress that itched like hell. She and James had been seated at the children's table and there found a sulking boy of their age. Truthfully, Kit never would have talked to him if they hadn't been forced to dance together. Grudgingly, they'd been pushed into the ballroom and danced a waltz together. All the while, Sirius grumbled about having to dance with a girl. Kit felt equally uncomfortable and complained about getting cooties. The two, despite saying they hated each other, stayed with James for the rest of the night.

She hadn't met Remus and Peter until they actually arrived at Hogwarts. They didn't even sit in the same compartment as them, despite what some people thought. She couldn't blame them, at times it seemed like the five of them were attached at the hip. But the trio had met Remus and Peter at the Gryffindor table after being sorted. Remus was reading Hogwarts: A History and Kit was curious to learn more about the school. Peter had tagged along that night and was placed in the same dorm and James, Sirius and Remus. Kit, for obvious reasons, wasn't in the same dorm as them and was instead put across the hall with the other girls. Being in that room had been nerve wracking the first time since she'd only ever been friends with guys since moving to England. And it was on that faithful night she'd met Lily Evans. Kit had been unpacking her things and Evans scoffed that she didn't own a single dress or skirt, save for the one that was mandatory with the uniform. When Kit asked why it was a problem, Evans said that she wasn't a proper lady. That was the beginning of a five year lecture of what was lady-like behaviour, of which Kit apparently had none. By the third year, she just tuned her out and fought back when she said something particularly insulting. There was one thing that Lily did say that Kit took to heart, though she'd never admit it. Kit developed a fondness for dresses after buying one on Lily's request. (It had been before she stood up to the prude of a ginger)

Kit frowned and hoped there would never come a day where she would have to admit that Lily Evans was right. Steam continued to fog up the mirrors as Kit's shower reached the fifteen minutes mark. One of the benefits of being a witch was that the hot water never ran out. But if she wanted any food, she had to get out now. Remus could only fend off his friends for so long. As she stepped out and looked about her room for something suitable to wear, she thought of the poignant day in her second year when Remus had confided in all of them. The night had been dark and stormy, an ominous sign to the Marauders as they converged in the second year boys dorm. Remus had been shaking, he'd been so nervous and he flinched when Kit tried to put an arm around him. James and Sirius sent worried glances at each other as he began talking, Peter sitting silently beside Kit. A moment of silence had hung over the group at his confession and in that moment of hesitation, Remus had assumed the worst. He yelled the them to get out and the boys quickly agreed, all three of the hoping out of the room in the blink of an eye. Kit had never been one to admit feelings or deal with them well, but she could tell how much it hurt Remus. She'd spent the night talking to him, trying to get him to understand why they'd paused. Eventually, he saw the light and thanked her.

Kit stood back as she looked through her closet and realized that it was because of that night she and Remus were such good friends. James, Sirius and Peter where different. She could joke with them and at times, she could turn to James for a shoulder, but it was Remus she went to most often. That new thought bright in her mind, Kit changed into shorts and an old t-shirt of Sirius's before finally getting to the kitchen. Hair still dripping wet, she smiled at her friends and went to Remus. He was loyally guarding a plate of french toast, which he slid to her as she sat.

"How do you manage to stay in a shower for twenty minutes?" Sirius asked around a mouthful of bacon he'd swiped from her plate. "What do you do in there?"

"Never you mind." Something occurred to her and she spun to look back at Remus. He had bags under his eyes, his eyes were red and he looked like hell. "Oh, Moony, this sucks!" Remus gave a tired chuckle and rubbed the back of his neck.

"It's not the best situation, but we can handle it." Remus said and the others nodded in agreement. But they knew why Kit was so upset, even though she wasn't showing it. It was tradition to spend the last night of summer together and it had been tradition since they were eleven. But if the full moon was tonight, it the guys would be out with Remus and Kit would be stuck at home. There had been a strict rule that no one was around when Remus underwent his transformation but when James, Peter and Sirius found out how to become Animagi, they went with him. There was another strict rule that was Kit couldn't come, even if she could transform, which she couldn't. Remus had never been around a girl when he was a werewolf and nobody wanted to take a chance.

"I've done the research," Kit began but Remus cut her off.

"i know you have. There isn't anything to prove that it's dangerous, but regardless of that says, I am dangerous."

"What if I could transform? Wouldn't that make a difference?" Kit pleaded, her eyes hopeful.

"Can you?" Sirius asked.

"Well, no. But I can learn."

"Kit, it took us the better part of three years to learn how to do it." James hopped up onto her counter and sighed. "It's not easy."

"I know that. I watched all of you struggle to do it. Don't you have any faith in me?"

"Not really," Sirius said as he took another piece of french toast from her plate. James gave him a look before turning to Kit.

"We do, I think you could do it. But the point is, this is for your safety, not because we don't think you can do it."

Kit sighed and knew he was right. She just wanted to be there for Remus. "I guess I'll have to find another way to entertain myself tonight," Kit sighed dramatically.

"Why don't you floo the Eric boy, I'm sure he'd be more than happy to entertain you." Sirius wagged his brows at her. Kit rolled her eyes as she ate.

"Oh, sod off." Eric was a year older than them and apparently had a bit of a thing for Kit. The others had quite a laugh teasing her about it the previous year until she finally agreed to go out with him. The date turned out to be quite fun and the two were now friends, but that didn't stop Eric from sending her presents and flowers whenever he could. Then again, he was a bit of a laugh to be around. He was really cute too. Smirking, Kit rose and put her dishes in the sink.

"Maybe I will go over to his. He's got a yard the size of a quidditch pitch and a couple spare brooms." Kit smiled at the group and thanked Sirius for the great idea before running back to her room. Once she was gone, James smacked Sirius and nearly sent him flying.

"Great job, you dolt."

"What? What did I do?" Sirius yelped, but fixed James with a look, a grin spreading across his face. "No. You don't, do you?" James busied himself with the hem of his shirt and tried to stop the red from creeping up his face. "Merlin, you do like her!"

"Shut up!" James hissed. "Yes, alright, I do. I have for a while." He admitted quietly, for once his bravado gone. Peter gaped at him while Sirius doubled over laughing.

"I don't see how this is remotely funny," James said as Sirius gasped for breath.

"I bloody hilarious! You go around with every other girl-"

"Pot calling the kettle black, don't you think?" James interjected, earning a laugh from Remus.

"-But you're afraid of putting the moves on Kit."

"Listen, just because you see every girl as nothing more than a shag buddy doesn't mean that's how I think! I happen to realize that there is more to a girl than what's between her legs!" James gave Sirius a shove before storming out of the house. Hearing the door slam, Kit ran down the stairs and poked her head into the kitchen.

"What happened?" Kit looked at Sirius and saw how confused he looked. He shrugged and went back to eating. "What did you do?" She sighed. More often than not, Sirius was the cause of trouble within the group. Sure, he and James were best friends, but Sirius had a startling ability to say things without thinking.

"Nothing! Why does everyone always assume it's me?"

"Experience." Kit rolled her eyes and turned to Remus and Peter. "You guys can stay here for the day, if you want. My parents won't be home until tomorrow so you've got free reign while I'm out."

"You're actually going over to Eric's place?" Sirius asked.

"Is that such a surprise? I'll be back tonight to see you all off, of course." She realized Sirius's look and scrunched her face up. "What am I supposed to do for the rest of the day. One of you has already driven James off, Remus will be stuck with his head in the loo for most of the day, Peter will be valiantly by his side. And you," she looked up at the Black sitting on her counter with a sneer, "will be up to no good. Precisely why you aren't to leave Moony's side. I don't want any girls in my guest room, got it?" Sirius looked offended for a moment but Kit patted his cheek with a grin.

"Behave!" She called as she tugged a stray hair into place and stepped into the fireplace. Houses blurred past her, each one gone before she could recognize it. When she stopped spinning and took a step out, she was met by a nice looking young man. His hair was fair and curled around his head loosely. Sparkling brown eyes were startled at seeing the petite Beater in his house, but they crinkled with warmth as he embraced her.

"Katherine! To what do I owe this pleasant surprise?" Eric held her at arms length and looked down at her. She really was uncommonly pretty, with her bright smile and that mop of hair atop her head. Her own eyes gazed back at him and he could see the fierceness within them, something he'd come to adore about the little woman.

"Nothing to do at home and I knew I could come to you for a good time." Kit bumped him with her shoulder as they walked through the foyer to the back garden. A grand expanse of greenery sprawled out before them, a forest just visible on the horizon. As they settled into the soft, warm grass, Kit wondered why she'd never given him a chance. He was really nice and a lot of fun to be around. And she'd always been tempted to play with his hair.

Eric caught her looking and put a hand out to her. "Knut for your thoughts?" Kit accepted the hand and settled against his chest, the warm summer breeze playing with her hair.

"I'm wondering why we only went out once." Kit had never been one for subtly. Behind her, Eric's chest vibrated with laughter.

"I've been thinking that since we went out. You really are a great girl, Kit. I'm just surprised I got there before someone else did." Kit turned to look at him with a grin.

"Can we save that sort of talk for a few months from now?" she asked, laughing when his face lit up at the prospect of being together for a few months.

"Sure, sure." Eric chuckled and settled back into the grass, gently toying with Kit's short hair. She couldn't fight the shiver that passed down her spine when his fingers trailed lightly against her head. Suddenly, Kit sat up and looked out into the field.

"You up a Quidditch match?" Eric had been a chaser on the Quidditch team but hadn't done it the past year because of a detention he'd received at the beginning of the term. "I promise to go easy on you."

"I reckon I'll be a bit rusty," he teased, rising and flicking his wrist to get the brooms.

"Just to warn you, I'm rubbish at chaser or keeper." Kit mounted her broom, quaffle in hand.

"I'll just have to teach you, then won't I?" Eric kicked off and chased her around the skies. Their match lasted for the better part of the day, each one trying to out do the other. Eric gave her pointers and guided her through basic chaser manoeuvres. By the time the sun began to sink behind the horizon, Kit and Eric were laying on the field, exhausted. Kit's head was against his shoulder and he was telling her stories about what he'd seen while on the quidditch team.

"I'm personally hoping to be drafted by the Tornadoes by next year." He said, which earned him a scoff from Kit.

"Really? Everyone knows the Magpies are the team to beat. Although, I'm hoping to be picked by the Falmouth Falcons."

Eric rolled his eyes with a laugh. "The most violent team in history, of course."

"Let us win, but if we cannot win, let us break a few heads." Kit quoted faithfully. The Falcons had always been her favourite team since buying a book of quidditch moves and seeing the carnage the Falcons left behind. "But if that dream cannot be, I'll settle for-"

"England," they both said with a sigh. Being on the National team would be an honour, but eveyone knew the best team was Ireland. Eric stuck out his hand.

"I look forward to some friendly competition in the future."

"I look forward to sending half your team to St. Mungo's." Kit laughed, tossing her head back. The dark sky caught her attention and she jumped up. "Merlin, I was supposed to be home ages ago!" She flashed Eric an apologetic smile as she helped him up.

"This was really fun," she said as they rushed back to the house.

"Yeah. Kit?" He asked as she stepped into the fireplace. "Would you like to give this a chance?" Eric asked hesitantly. The last time he'd asked that question, she'd laughed.

"Only if you think you can deal with me." Eric nodded happily and she leaned out of the mantle to press a gentle kiss against his lips. "See you tomorrow?"

"Of course," He waved as she spun in the fireplace and arrived at her house not a moment too soon. Remus was at the back door his skin stretched over his bones. Peter, James and Sirius all stood by him anxiously. Kit could understand their worry; he looked as if he was going to be sick at any moment. She rushed over and pressed and hand against his back.

"Be good," he gave a humourless chuckle before loping off into the night. Sirius and Peter followed after him, but James stayed back, focused on something in her face.

"You're blushing."

Kit huffed to cover her embarrassment, waving at hand at him. "Am not, now go before he rips my backyard to shreds." James' brows drew together and he opened his mouth to say something, but thought better of it and ran off after his friends. Once she was alone, Kit pressed a hand against her cheek, annoyed to find that it was warm. How could one guy make her blush? She'd never been one to blush before, finding it much easier to laugh off the embarrassment before she had a chance to colour. She padded through to the living room and kicked her shoes off before throwing herself onto the couch. Her eyes were just sliding closed when something tapped at her window.

Kit groaned and felt around for her wand, her eyes still not open. She pointed it at the window and opened it with a little flick. A familiar black bird flew in and sat on the bat of the couch. It hooted loudly at the little girl, who ignored him as she tried to get to sleep. Apparently, the bird had different ideas as she was woken up by something pecking at the skin of her neck.

"Gerroff Magus!" Kit yelled as she swiped at the bird. Damn creature her cousin seemed to adore. She swore at it as he presented his leg, a note attached. Kit recognized her cousin's neat printing and ripped it open lazily.

_Kit,_

_I don't quite know how to get to the King's Cross Station. Could you meet me at the hotel?_

_Rosie_

Kit groped around for a quill, annoyed when she couldn't find one in walking distance. James was going to kill her when Quidditch season rolled around, she was so out of shape. Her match against Eric had worn her out. She rose and thumped into the foyer, the writing desk open and waiting for her. She didn't bother to get a new parchment as she began to write back.

_I'll meet you at the hotel at nine. Completely knackered, see you tomorrow._

_Kit_

Her messy scrawl looked awful compared to her cousin's neat writing, but Kit couldn't have been bothered to do anything about it. Grabbing the loud bundle of black feathers, Kit attached the note and all but threw it from the house.

"Damn bird," she hissed as she fell back onto the couch. She couldn't wait to tell the guys that Rosalinda was coming to Hogwarts for her last two years. She and Rosie were best friends and one of Kit's few female companions. The only reason she wasn't with Rose twenty-four hours a day was that Rose was back in Moscow. Or at least she had been until recently. She'd finally worked up the nerve to tell her parents that she didn't want to study at Durmstrang and came to England to go to school with Kit. She was proud of her cousin even if she'd waited until the last minutes to tell her parents, but it was still a big change. Abstractly, just on the verge of sleep, Kit wondered if Rosie would adjust alright.


	2. Chapter 2

Kit woke with a smile already on her face. Without opening her eyes, she knew today was the day. The first day of school, the first day back as a sixth year, the first day with Rose as a fellow student. Smiling sleepily, Kit rolled over and burrowed deeper into the sheets, finding it easy to drift back into a peaceful slumber. Just on the edge of sleep, she noticed the bright sun poking through her curtains. Why was it so bright, she thought blearily, but her eyes flew open a moment later. She launched herself from the bed to stand inches from the clock on her dresser as if standing closer to the timepiece would make her understand the time easier. It was nine-twenty already and she'd agreed to meet Rose at nine. Swearing quietly, she pulled on something halfway decent and practically ran down the stairs. Remus was sleeping on her couch, the worst of his wounds having already been taken care of by her parents. James was sleeping on the floor by him, Peter stretched out by the fireplace. Sirius, of course, occupied the massive armchair, limbs hanging limply from the sides. Kit rushed past them as quietly as possible and met her parents in the kitchen. When she opened her mouth to apologize for her friends having stayed the night, they both raised a hand.

"Nonsense, Kit. You know they're always welcome," her mother whispered with a kind smile. Her accent was still thick, but the sound always comforted Kit. Hearing it made her slow down her hasty actions long enough to notice she was spreading jam onto the lid of the jar.

"I've taken care of the worst of them, but he'll hurt when he wakes up." Luka, her father, said as he passed her a tea. An accomplished healer, Luka often offered his help when any of them were sick or, more often, wounded somehow.

"Don't worry about your things, we'll take them when we drop the boys off at the station. Just go to meet Rosie." Her mother patted her along, but not before Kit could press a finger to her lips.

"It's a secret, mom. Don't let them know," Kit looked at the guys before disappearing through the front door. She glanced at her watch and rolled her eyes; she was already late. Brushing her bangs from her eyes, she turned a corner and thought about the hotel Rose was staying at. With the image firmly in her mind, Kit disapparated. The tugging sensation behind her navel still made her queasy, bu it was much faster than attempting to walk to the hotel. She stumbled on her landing, falling to her knees in front of the grandeur hotel.

"Hello, I'm looking for Rosalinda Morozov, please." Kit asked the lady behind the counter. The woman looked through a log and shook her head.

"She's already left, dear." She gave an apologetic smile that Kit nearly missed as she ran from the lobby. Why had Rose left? She'd said she was going to meet her! How in the hell did Rosie think she'd be able to navigate London without her help?

"Rose?" Kit called into the busy street, straining to see over the tops of people's heads and failing miserably. She headed away from the hotel and towards the Kings Cross station in the hopes that Rose had at least seen the street signs that advertised the train station. The foot traffic lessened and soon Kit could make out a girl struggling with a luggage cart.

"Rose!" Kit ran and collided with the cousin she considered a sister. She felt Rose's long blonde hair tickle her arms as the wind caught it and felt the familiar warmth of her embrace. It had been a long time since she'd last seen her. A very long seven years. Rain began to patter onto the street as Kit bombarded her with information, rambling on about how the hotel said she'd already left and that she was barely down the street. They walked to the station, Kit telling her foreign relative all about her best friends, the infamous Marauders. James, Sirius, Remus and Peter were her best friends since the moment she arrived at Hogwarts, James and Sirius even before then.

Kit waved off her cousin's worries and smiled. "I think you'll love them. Great bunch, the lot of them." She pulled Rosie's trolley further down the street, bent against the rain.

"What luck, eh? The minute you arrive, it starts pouring." But even as Kit said it, she knew she wouldn't have it any other way. She'd lived in Russia with Rosie until she was about nine when her parents up and left for England. They'd told her later on that it was because of a family reason that she wouldn't understand. Kit shrugged it off for the time being, her parents would tell her when they were ready.

Rose and Kit fought against the wind and made quiet small talk until they finally reached the Kings Cross Station. Upon entering, Kit's face lit up again.

"You're going to love this!" She grabbed her cousin's hand and pulled her through the crowd, heedless of Magus's screeches.

"What are you doing! You'll draw attention!" Rosalinda hissed at Kit as they barrelled through the crowd. Kit's flashed her a bright smile before waving off her cousin's concern.

"Please, these muggles wouldn't care if I ran right into them. I'm too short for anyone to take notice." Although the same couldn't be said for Rosalinda. Tall and willowy, with golden hair that wrapped around her body. She was thin too, enviously so, considering Kit didn't know if she even played quidditch. That wasn't to say Kit truly envied Rose; she'd hardly be able to pick up a bat if she was like Rosie. They were just different, but joined at the hip nonetheless.

Kit pulled up breathless to the wall between platform nine and ten, smile still in place. Rosalinda looked down at her ticket suspiciously.

"Nine and three-quarters? Where...?" Rose looked around, making Kit double over with laughter.

"And here I thought you were the bright one. Just take a running start at it and you'll be fine." Kit walked to the wall and pretended to look at her watch.

"Take a running start at what?" Rose asked, confused by Kit's instructions, but Kit simply looked up and winked at her. She put and hand out and casually leaned against the wall, and with a quick glance around, slipped into the bricks. Rose gaped at where she'd been, a smile slowly forming.

"Running start it is..." Rose pulled back before dashing at the wall. When she should have just bounced off of the solid brick, she slid through them. The front of her trolley hit Kit's back, sending Magus's cage flying. Kit rubbed her back but ducked to get the restless bird.

"I don't know what you see in him, Rose. I really don't." They walked to the scarlet train, Kit laughing at how Rose kept glancing back at the wall she'd just run through. "You don't have anything like that in Russia?"

"Something like it, but nothing that...that...cool!" Kit beamed at her cousin's enthusiasm.

"You ain't seen nothing yet," Kit led her onto the train and poked around compartments, searching for the four guys she'd been waiting to see for weeks. Her head peeked between the doors to one compartment and she grimaced at who was sitting there. Lily Evans, surrounded by her perfect friends.

"Ruskova."

"Evans. You seen James?" Kit loved asking Lily about James; despite being in the same house, they despised each other in a way that was fun to make fun of.

"You mean your dolt of a best friend? He went past a while back with his stupid pack." Evans grimaced, making Kit's face light up.

"Thanks Lily, love! You're doll." Kit blew a kiss at the red-head before dashing off, in the hopes of avoid the curses that were coming from Lily's mouth. "Run!" She told a stunned Rosie as she grabbed her hand and dragged her down the aisle.

"A friend of yours?" Rose asked once they were a safe distance from the fuming girl.

"How'd you guess?" Kit opened a door and poked her head in. Four heads popped up to great her, each one so familiar they were like family.

"Who're running from?" Sirius asked.

"His girlfriend," Kit joked, making James growl and throw a book at her. "Hey! Is that any way to treat your best beater? Besides, I have news for you lot." They stopped laughing and nodded at her in unison. "You know my cousin?"

"Your 'attached at the hip except that she's on another continent' cousin?"

"That would be her. And she's here! To stay!" Kit pushed aside the door with a flourish to reveal Rosalinda. She tucked a long stand of hair behind her ear and waved.

"These are your Marauder friends?" She asked, her Russian accent easily noticeable. Kit opened her mouth to respond, but before she could Sirius jumped up.

"You're Russian?' He asked stupidly. Kit pushed him back.

"Yes, you prat. You'd know that if you actually listened once in a while." Kit rolled her eyes at him. "That charmer is Sirius Black." He went to get up again, but Kit stopped him.

"You look at her the wrong way and I will shove my beater's bat so far..." He shrugged but sat back. "The one in the back eating chocolate is Remus Lupin. He's the nicest one you'll find in this bunch." Remus smiled at Rose warmly. "This is Peter. He's really nice and sweet, if a little misinformed." A stout blond boy glared at Sirius from his seat.

"I blame Pads for that." He muttered. Rosie mouthed "Pads?" to Kit, but she shook her head.

"I'll tell you later. Oh, and this is James."

Rosie let out a genuine smile and gave her cousin a look. "Yes, you've told me a lot about him." She gave Kit a playful push on the shoulder.

"What? What did you say about me?" James's head popped up, glasses slipping down his nose.

"Never mind. This is Rosalinda, or Rose. My best friend!" Kit threw an arm around Rose and squeezed. She took her trunks and put them away for her as Rose sat down.

"Katherine! That must weigh sixty kilos!" Rose had expected her to topple over, yet there she was, lifting her trunks like they were nothing.

"Growing up with this one," she pointed to James, "and five years of quidditch tends to do that to people." Kit sat back and smiled as Rose settled into the group.

"Did Kit just giggle?" Peter asked, looking at her curiously. She'd never been one to embrace the girly, feminine side of her personality around the guys. When she laughed most of the time, it was her loud, clear chuckle. But Rose was like a sister to her and it had been so long since she'd had a girl to giggle with. Kit glared at Peter as she got Rose's bags.

"I am capable of doing that, you know." She continued putting the bags up and sighed as Rosie flitted around her. "You're going to drive me mad come quidditch season." She flopped into a seat between James and Sirius and watched Rose jump when Remus spoke. She seemed nervous, overly so. Maybe she was a bit jumpy because she was new and such. Not to mention as a child Kit had made it necessary for her to be on her guard all the time. Just as Kit thought about the pranks she used to pull, Rose told the Marauders she she'd rarely had a moment's peace growing up with Kit. Across from her, Kit broke into a fit of laughter. Those had been the days! Rosalinda had the uncanny ability to say exactly what Kit was thinking, which was going to come in handy in the years to come. She'd written to Rose all the time and recently she'd been writing about James. They weren't letters confessing her undying love for him or anything; writing to Rose had given her the freedom to say the things she couldn't say to her friends. Now she'd just have to keep an eye on that mouth of hers.

Sirius wrapped an arm around Kit's shoulder and she could feel Rose's confusion. To anyone who knew Sirius, it wouldn't be confusing at all, but Rosie was still new. Sirius was too much of a brother to feel anything but vague annoyance for, but that didn't stop him from getting touchy-feeling when he felt like it. Namely when he just broke up with another girl. Kit hoped that he would be smart enough not to try anything on Rose.

Kit half rose from her seat when Remus mentioned the dark arts. She knew how Rose felt about that subject; she'd never wanted to take it, but had to. Her parents knew she didn't like the course but it was either she took the course or she left Durmstrang, which hadn't been an option. Until now, that is. Finally having had enough, Rose politely told her parents she couldn't spend anymore time learning about torture and Unforgivable curses and that she was going to stay with Kit's family. Silence fell over them, but was quickly interrupted by Lily barging in. Great, Kit thought. And then the red-head turned on the charm. She smiled at Rose kindly, introducing herself politely. Rising slowly, Rosie looked her over, making Lily squirm. Kit loved her cousin sometimes. She wasn't angry often, but when she was, it was a force to be reckoned with. And just when Kit thought Lily hadn't quite mucked it up yet, she asked if Rose was Romanian. Any other time, Kit would have laughed, but as it was she squeezed her shoulder gently.

"Not worth it. Not yet." Kit breathed to her cousin as she faced Lily. "Was there something you needed, Lily love?"

She shook her head quickly. "Nothing."

"Good. Then, ta!" She pushed her back and slammed the door shut. Letting out a sigh of relief from averting the storm, she blinked slowly. Rose was back in her seat, already talking with Remus about something. Kit sat down and let her head fall against the seat.

"Remind me to never get that one angry." Sirius whispered to her, smirking.

"Good idea, because that was just the tip of the iceberg." Kit had been on the receiving end of her wrath only once and that had been long ago. Now, it was probably ten times worse. Beside her, Padfoot barked out a laugh.

"It's easy to tell you two are related." He joked, making Kit smile. "Besides the fact you look nothing alike, of course. I have to say, if all your cousin are that pretty, you must bring them over more often." Kit jabbed a fist into his stomach, making him double over. Whether it was from pain or laughter, she couldn't tell. She went to sit back when he grabbed a a fistful of her hair and gave it a tug.

"Hey!" She screeched, grabbing a handful of his locks. "How does that feel, huh?" He reached around and held her head under his arm, holding her still, his face split into a smile.

"Ew! Get off of me!" Kit's arms flailed about, but Sirius held her fast.

"What do you say?" He asked sweetly. She grumbled that she was not going say something so stupid. "But you agreed to it."

"I was blind drunk when I did." She protested, but Sirius shook his head.

"It was still an agreement." Rose jumped up as she saw Sirius's arm tighten its hold. Remus pulled her back with a laugh.

"They're always like this. It'll be fine." Rose looked back cautiously, but resigned to sit back down.

Kit huffed and screwed her eyes shut. "I swear that Sirius Black is the sexiest man I have ever met." She glared up at him. "Happy?"

"What else?" he prodded.

"And he is God's gift to women. Now let me go, you sod!" Sirius let her go and she tumbled back into her seat. Her short hair was wild around her head, poking out in every direction at once. Rose looked between her and James and broke into bubbly giggles. Remus followed her gaze and choked on his chocolate, he laughed so hard.

"What?" James and Kit said in unison. Blinking, they looked at each other then laughed.

"Your hair!" James wheezed, glasses slipping off of his nose.

"My hair? What about yours?" Kit wiped the tears from her face and held onto James while she laughed. They both looked ridiculous, but she wouldn't have it any other way, as cliche as that was.

"James?' Remus asked, checking his watch.

"Huh?" Prongs snorted then looked down at Kit, who was practically in his lap. God, she looked absurd right now, face flushed from laughing, hair sticking up everywhere. But that was Kit; she never cared what she looked like or what people thought. She dove headfirst into everything she did with hesitation. It was something she'd picked up from James at a young age and their parents had a hell of a time trying to control the pair of them.

"Eloquent," Kit muttered at James' response, eliciting a grin out of Remus and Rose.

"Aren't you a Prefect?" James looked at his watch and swore. "You were supposed to meet with the others five minutes ago." James leapt up, knocking Kit off of her perch and ran for the door.

"Bye!" He shouted before dashing down the corridor.

"Actually, we should get changed." Remus rose and pulled his trunk down, Sirius doing the same.

"C'mon," Kit got both their bags and pulled out their uniforms. "We'll be back."

"Aw, won't you stay?" Sirius pouted. Rose giggled, trying to ignore the feeling that was buzzing in her stomach.

"Any other time, maybe. But Rose hasn't adjusted to being around you enough to allow for that." Rose looked at her quizzically as they walked to an empty compartment.

"What was that?" She asked as she pulled on her skirt.

"The moment Sirius takes his shirt off, he starts to pose, whether he knows it or not. And, speaking from experience, it's easy to get distracted. I don't want his ego getting any bigger."

"From experience?" Rose laughed. "I though you said he was like a brother to you."

"He is, but there's no denying he's handsome." Kit shrugged. Rose thought it would be hard to denying that, but kept her mouth shut for Kit's sake.

"We have to wear this?" Rose picked at the gray kilt and knee-highs.

"I thought you had a uniform at Durmstrang," Kit pulled her blazer on and threw her robe across her arm.

"Of course, but...I don't know. From what you wrote, I thought it'd be different."

Kit laughed as they walked back to the compartment. "That's because I'm used to it now. Don't worry, you will to." Kit gave her hand a little squeeze as she pulled open the door. Sirius was lounging across the seats, hands tucked behind his head. Remus sat across from him, his long legs propped up on the seat by Sirius's feet. Peter was sitting beside Remus, reading one of his textbooks, a frown working onto his face.

"James still not back?" Kit asked, kicking Sirius's legs out of the way.

"We won't see him until we get to the school." As if on cue, the train lurched and a whistle blew. Kit spun to Rose, her eyes alight with excitement.

"Wait until to you see the school!" She grabbed her hand and ran to the front of the train, careful not to go as quickly as she had before. The others weren't far behind as she practically skipped through the corridor.

"What about our trunks?" Rose asked breathlessly.

"They'll be in our dorms tonight. Don't worry. Now look!" Kit let her cousin get off of the train first and pointed to the castle. Rose had never see something quite so majestic. It was lit with thousands of orange torches, each one reflected off of the black lake before them.

"Wow," Rosie breathed. Kit beamed up at, her hand still holding Rose's.

"This is my home." She said quietly, her voice tainted with an emotion Rose couldn't describe. But before she could say anything Kit shook her shoulders and smiled.

"We've got the run of this place. Wait and see," Sirius said proudly from behind them. Rose's hand clutched Kit's instinctively at the shock, but relaxed just as quickly. But Kit noticed how warm her hand was all of a sudden. Sirius bowed to Kit and slipped an arm through hers, Remus doing the same with Rose, and they all took off to the carriages. They clambered inside and bounced off to the Entrance hall. Remus, Sirius, Peter and Kit spoke of all the things Rose had to see when they got to school.

"The staircases!" Peter squeaked, earning him a confused look from Rosie.

"But I have seen staircases before."

"Not like these, you haven't." Sirius gave her a wolfish grin before mentioning that she should learn to tickle the pear. Rosie's pale skin flushed bright red as she tried to come up with an answer. Kit saved her from it by slapping Sirius's arm.

"Eugh, gross! He means you need to learn how to sneak into the kitchens." Kit huffed at the boy, who gave her a sweet smile in return.

"Sneak in? Isn't that against the rules?" Rose received three dry looks for her question.

"Yes, and?" Kit asked with a shrug of her shoulders. Rosie could only hope that Kit didn't get her expelled. The carriage came to a bumpy stop and the others looked to each other, smiling.

"Your new home awaits," Sirius hopped out and held a hand for her, the other leading the way to the castle.

* * *

**Hey there! Thanks for reading and I hope to hear from in a review. I have the next five chapters written, and I'm posting them a.s.a.p.**

**Recognizable stuff belongs to Rowling**

**Rose belongs to ..**

**Kit belongs to me**

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**


	3. Chapter 3

Kit looked up at Hogwarts, a dreamy smile floating across her lips. This was the place she loved to be. She could run down the halls, throwing pieces of chalk at Peeves and know that there were four boys not far behind. She belonged here. Here, she didn't have to worry about why her parents left or what was going on beyond the stone walls. Life at Hogwarts, for the time being, was like living in a bubble, oblivious to the happenings beyond the gates. She had great friends, great teachers and she knew the place like the back of her hand. During the year she spent so much time away from her family that James, Remus, Sirius and Peter became her family. And now she had Rose to share that with. Her wonderful cousin who was a joy to be around, someone who understood Kit's thirst for adventure and zest for the wild side of life.

Rose who was staring up at Sirius with big eyes. Kit growled, the sound rumbling deep in her chest. Jerking her hand away from Rose, she grabbed Sirius's collar with such speed he tumbled back into the wall. He could bed every other girl, break every other heart, but not Rosalinda's. Kit had stayed up with far too many sobbing girl's to let that happen so some she loved so much.

"What did I say about touching her, Black?" She had to look up into his face, but her cold stare was more than enough to prove her point. His face blanched, his mouth moving to say something to calm the girl before him. But as he tried to think of something, his faced calmed. Kit gave his an angry shake. That's right, protect your reputation but you don't give a damn about anyone else's, she thought bitterly. "I will not have you mess with her like you did all the others." She couldn't really justify her protectiveness of Rose, except that she had always been the smart one, the one who didn't get into trouble unless greatly provoked. Rosie was strong too, in ways Kit sometimes wasn't. And if anyone changed that, who would kit turn to? It was selfish now that she thought about it, saving someone else, whether they wanted it or not, because Kit needed someone strong.

"Kit? What's going on?" Kit jumped away from Sirius when James broke her concentration. She looked up at James, shifted uncomfortably for a moment. Rose wrapped her arm around Kit's waist and tugged her gently.

"Come along Kit, I think I am to be sorted with the children in their first year." Kit nodded distractedly and waited until they were a fair distance from the boys before speaking.

"I'm sorry about that Rosie. It's just I've watched that boy break so many hearts and I just couldn't stand the thought of him doing that to you." Kit's eyes went dark with guilt as she pointedly didn't mention the fact she'd done it for her own sake. But Rose smiled at her and was soon whisked off by McGonagall. Kit grinned up at her Head of House and shrugged.

"I was showing Rosie here around a bit." McGonagall looked down at her shrewdly but sighed. There wasn't any point in bothering the young Gryffindor about it now. She waved her off to the Great Hall, but Kit turned to look at Rose instead. The professor gave an annoyed cough, but Kit ignored it, seeing her cousin's fear.

"Now when you go in, everyone will be looking at you, but just keep your chin up and eyes forward. Remember, your representing me in there!" Kit gave her hand a squeeze, but Rose said she didn't think she could do it.

"Now you listen to me Rosalinda Isolde, you will walk in there with pride and grace and you will do it without falling. You wanted to come here. Now you have to show them that you are meant to be here just as much as any of them." Kit told Rose. She meant every word; Rose belonged here just as much as anyone else. Kit knew Rose wanted to hear more, but she turned and went into the Great Hall. Sometimes you just had to throw a bird from the nest and hoped it soared. She walked down the aisle until she reached the spot the Marauders had claimed since first year. Sitting between Sirius and James, she turned to the former and sighed.

"I'm sorry about that. It's just that she's like my sister and given your reputation..." She laughed and was relieved when Sirius did the same.

"I mean no harm, believe me. Good?" He held out his arm and gave her his most pathetic look. It was one that made most girls swoon, it was his signature "deal-sealer" look. Kit rolled her eyes, but settled into the crook of his arm. Beside them, James tapped his fingers impatiently against the table.

"Waiting for someone?" Kit joked, nodding at the tattoo his was beating out against the grain.

"Hm? Nothing," James turned away from them to look at the Head Table.

"What's got his knickers in a twist?" She asked Sirius. He just shook his head and let out a barking laugh. He leant across and gave James a playful punch. "Oh, lighten up. It was a joke." James let out a breath and relaxed.

"Yeah, alright." He threw his napkin at Sirius, who was still punching him. Between the two of them, Kit was being tossed around like a rag doll, much to her dismay.

"As fun as it is to be knocked about like a quaffle, can we focus on my cousin getting sorted?" Kit gave her a thumbs up as she passed. Rose smiled quickly, but kept walking. She'd made it the whole way with her head high. When Dumbledore introduced her, The Marauders jumped up and cheered so loudly some people plugged their ears. Sirius let out a piercing wolf-whistle, making Rose blush from her spot. The sound was cut off by Kit jamming her elbow into his gut. Dumbledore laughed and shook his head,

"Thank you Mr. Black for deafening my ears a little more then they already are. And Miss Ruskova, please refrain from hurting him. You'll need him come quidditch season."

Kit laughed and shrugged. "I pick up most of his slack anyways." There was a ripple of laughter from the crowd. everyone knew that come game season, Sirius spent most of his time flying around, impressing the girls. He was a great beater, but he'd be much more useful if he actually did something productive on the pitch. As a result, Kit played both positions. But the laughter was silenced by the Sorting hat being placed on Rose's head. There was a moment of silence as the Sorting Hat thought then "Hufflepuff!" Kit cheered and watched as Rose sat down by Diggory. She couldn't help but feel a little pang that she wasn't joining her at the Gryffindor table. But some things couldn't be changed, sadly. So long as she was allowed in their common room, Kit was sure everything would be fine. She and the others watched as Diggory kissed her hand, each waiting slowly for Kit's reaction. She shrugged and turned back to Dumbledore.

"What?" Sirius hissed and spun Kit to look at him. "I so much as put my arm around her and you throw me against a wall, but Amos kisses her and you just shrug!"

"He kissed her hand. And besides, he's a nice boy."

"Hypocrite," Sirius huffed.

"Man whore,"

"Fake,"

"Horny slut,"

"Did you just call me a slut?"

"How many girls have you slept with?"

"That's besides the point-"

"No, that is the point."

"God, women!"

"And here I thought you loved us."

"There is a big difference between love and sex,"

"You disgust me sometimes,"

Sirius opened his mouth to say something, but James shoved a dinner roll in there instead.

"Enough. You'd think you two were married or something." He rolled his eyes at Remus and Peter, who laughed at the pair.

Kit turned to James and said, "But I'm right, aren't I?" She smiled at him sweetly, batting her eyes.

"Well..."

"Prongs! You're selling me out to her! I thought I was your best friend." Sirius stabbed his steak angrily, but they all knew he was fine. Kit and Sirius arguing was like the rain; inevitable.

"Sure," Kit rolled her eyes and dug into the feast before her.

"Let's put it down to a test then, shall we?" Remus suggested. "Tonight, a series of challenges to prove who really is James best friend." He looked down at them seriously, the token Marauder glint in his eye. Kit and Sirius looked at each other and nodded.

The sun had long since and technically they all should have been in their dorms. Technically, Kit should have made sure Rose was at least in the Hufflepuff dorm and technically they all had class tomorrow at nine. But that didn't stop James, Sirius, Remus, Peter, Kit and Rose from standing on the edge of the Black Lake at midnight.

Remus, James, Peter and Rose stood on the shore, Remus holding a piece of parchment. "Ready?" Sirius and Kit nodded and shook hands.

"How old was James when he broke his first bone?"

"Eight! He fell off of his broom." Sirius shouted. Remus nodded and gave him one point. Kit huffed and took one step into the freezing water.

"What did he get for Christmas last year from his aunt?"

"A new jumper and a set of gold scales." Kit called, earning her one point. "Ha!" She stuck her tongue out at Sirius as he stepped into the lake. The rules of the game were simple; Remus asked question and for every one someone got right, the other had to take another step into the lake. The loser was determined by who fell off of the sharp drop off first.

"Who was James' first crush?" James turned red at the question, not that anyone could tell in the dark.

"Easy! Evans!" Sirius puffed out his chest proudly.

"Before she opened her mouth, I assume?" Kit asked James from the water as she took a step back.

"Definitely before that," he laughed. He could see her start to shiver as she water lapped against her calves. Apparently Rose saw too.

"Is this safe?" She asked Remus worriedly. He shook his head and touched her shoulder.

"She's fine, if that's what you're worried about. She bounces back from everything." It did little to calm her nerves, but she laughed as Kit splashed Sirius.

"Not fair! Hey!" She ran over and dumped a handful of water on him, soaking his hair. He grabbed her shoulders and held here in place while he shook his head. Tiny beads of icy water covered her face as he shook like a dog. She pushed him back, laughing when he fell into the water. Arms flailing, he ran after as she dashed from the water. She took refuge behind James, who didn't have time to react before Sirius tumbled onto him.

"What the-?" Was all Remus could get out before he was pulled down my the mass of limbs. They rolled together back into the water, each thoroughly soaked in a matter of seconds. Peter came after them, but hovered by the water's edge.

"C'mon you!" Kit grabbed his ankles and pulled him into the inky depths. Now that she was wet, she didn't care what happened next. James dived beneath the water and pulled on her legs, one hand tugging on each of her calves. She gasped as she was pulled under by him and thrashed around, until she got a hold of his collar.

"You are not getting away that easily," she warned as he tried to swim off. She tackled him around the waist and they tumbled onto the shore. "You are going to pay for tonight,"

"I'd like to see you try," James said, wiping the water from his eyes. Behind them, Remus, Sirius and Peter were still thrashing around in the lake. James rolled to face her, taking advantage of the fact she was too busy laughing at the others to notice him staring. Her hair was damp and plastered to her skull, water dripping from her floppy fringe. Her face was bright with a smile that so rarely left her pixie features. She really was one of the guys, the way she laughed so easily with them and knew so much about all of them. They trusted her with some of the darkest secrets they had, Remus especially, and she'd taken them all in stride. But at the same time, she couldn't just be one of the guys any longer. She'd changed since a few years ago; she was a young woman now, no longer the brash tomboy she'd been before. She'd matured in a way that made impossible to mistake her for one of the guys. And with what James was feeling, it would be hard for them to be just friends for much longer. He sighed and looked down at his hands. He wasn't willing to ruin a friendship just because his heart hammered when she was near.

"Knut for your thoughts?" Kit asked, resting her head on his shoulder.

"Nah, they're boring anyways,"

"I'm absolutely certain they're not," she prodded with a smile.

"This is going to be a big year." James admitted.

"Why?"

"Rose is here," she was off, laughing with Peter, Remus and Sirius, kicking water at them. "I'm a prefect and Quidditch captain. Things are changing."

Kit bumped his shoulder with hers. "But you're the infamous James Potter. You can do anything." James looked at her and hoped it was true.

* * *

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	4. Chapter 4

After taking Rose back to the Hufflepuff dorm, they stumbled up to the Gryffindor Tower, each using the person beside them for support. The sad part was they didn't make it to their respective beds until three in the morning. Instead of just going to bed like normal people, the Marauders stayed up and talked about the past summer and the year ahead. There had been much planning that night, though whether or not any of them would remember it come morning was a different story. That night was a homecoming of sorts; Kit had seen all of them over the summer (actually, it was getting away from them that was the problem) but being together at Hogwarts was indescribable.

It wasn't until class almost started that any other them rolled out of bed. As usual, Remus was the first one out, followed by Peter. Sirius, James and Kit seemed to have a competition of who could sleep in the latest and still make it to class. Remus, Peter and James sat in Potions class, hoping Kit would make it before the second bell. From across the room, Rose looked around nervously. What if Kit was sick or hurt? But at the last second, Kit burst through the doors, hair a mess and her robes hanging loosely on her frame. Slughorn opened his mouth to congratulate her on her impeccable timing when she sneezed loudly.

"I hate you, Potter." She hissed as she slid into her seat beside him.

"What did I do?"

"We played that stupid game because of you." She wiped her nose on her sleeve and attempted to right her haphazard robes.

"But you agreed it to. Besides, it was Mooney's idea."

Kit turned and tossed a crumpled parchment at him. Slughorn tutted at the group and asked if he could carry on with his lesson.

"Sorry, sir." James said and nodded at the professor.

"Thank you for allowing me to go on. Must I seek your permission with every class?" Slughorn asked dryly.

"Well, sir. I am a prefect and Quidditch Captain. I've got a certain amount of authority around here- oof!" Kit elbowed him to shut him up and smiled at the professor.

"Ignore my dim friend."

He chuckled and turned to the board. "Believe me, Miss Ruskova, most of the time, I do."

Kit laughed at James' crestfallen expression as he flipped through his potions textbook gloomily. It was laughable at how easily his pride was bruised, so much so that the others started to snigger as well. He whipped around and tossed a quill at Sirius's head, who ducked it easily. Kit shook her head and looked down at her own textbook disparagingly. She hated potions, absolutely hated it. She and potions were like James and Snape; nothing could make it work. The only reason she was taking the course was because she wanted to be an Auror and the only reason she could take it at this level was because she'd spent three solid nights with James studying for the O.W.L. He was actually quite good at the subject and through intense studying and a tiny bit of bribery, Kit had passed. Granted, she'd only gotten an Acceptable, but it was still a pass. She just hoped that the exam this year would be easier. Knowing Slughorn, it wouldn't be, but a little sugared pineapple could go a long way with him. Or at least Kit hoped it would.

Kit read the board and turned to James. "I'll get the ingredients, then?" James looked past her and saw that they were to partner with the person sitting beside them. He nodded and turned to the Bulking Brew in his textbook. He watched as Kit went off to get the ingredients, noticeably so. Sirius smacked his head and sighed.

"You are way too obvious, Prongs."

James fixed his hair moodily. "I don't know what you're talking about." His face was slowly gaining colour and despite his efforts to hide it, his friends all saw the red creeping up his collar.

"Just ask her already!" Remus said.

"I can't."

"Why the hell not?"

"She'll say no," James slumped down in his seat dejectedly. He shot back up when his friends burst out laughing.

"What? What's so funny?" It wasn't James that asked, but Kit, her arms loaded with various jars.

"James being a dolt," Sirius said, earning him a smack on the head.

"He doesn't mean to," Kit said. James brightened at her words. "It just comes naturally to him." Kit shrugged, but threw an arms around him when he deflated.

"Prongs! You take everything to heart! C'mon, if anyone is the dolt here it's me." James opened his mouth to say something, but Kit held a hand up. "Let's remember that I had to bribe Slughorn to pass me last year. You have no argument." James considered her for a moment then sighed and nodded.

"Hey!" Kit exclaimed, earning a bout of laughter from the guys behind them. "Just because I said it was true doesn't mean you can agree!" Her other complaints were cut short when Slughorn's rotund gut appeared at their desk. Kit looked up and grinned sheepishly up at him. He rose an eyebrow at the group.

"We were just going to start working," Remus said.

"I would suggest you so do." Slughorn gave them a final stern look before waddling to the rest of the classroom.

* * *

One hour later later, Kit slumped out of the classroom, her bag heavy with homework. She and James had produced a passable potion, earning them a pass for the day, but Slughorn had assigned a two foot essay on the uses of Petrified Dragon Scales in a potion. Why would she ever need to know what dragon scales were used for in a potion, much less petrified dragon scales. If she became an Auror, she'd just get James to make the potions for her.

The man in question threw an arm around her and gave it a squeeze. "Cheer up, we'll write it together."

"But why do I need to know why they're important? It's not like I'm ever going to use that in my life." Kit moped on her way to Charms.

"Actually..." Remus began, but was cut off by James, who smacked the back of his head.

"Never mind that, we've already decided I'd make them for her." He smiled at Kit, who beamed back. Sirius turned to Remus and made a whipping motion with his hand.

"Stop it," Remus chided his friend, but couldn't help but smiling as he watched James and Kit walk into Charms together, his arm draped over her shoulder. It just wondered how long it would take her to finally notice that James Potter was in love with her.

Professor Flitwick was waiting for them at the head of the classroom and the Marauders took their seats in the front row. The Professor's face crinkled into a smile when he saw James and Kit.

"My two favourite students,"

"My favourite teacher," Kit said back, sliding into her seat. She loved Charms and the complexity of the subject. It was a challenge, and Kit was never one to beck down from a competition.

"I must say, it is wonderful to be in the company of someone with a similar vertical disposition. Or lack thereof," Professor Flitwick laughed as he ushered the other students in. Kit wasn't nearly as short as the diminutive teacher, but she hardly towered over him, unlike Sirius and James.

"Now, today we will be working on a Severing Charm. This will allow you to sever things from others, hence the name. It can be used as such." Flitwick's eyes scanned the room before settling on Sirius.

"Mr Black, if you would," he motioned to the centre of the room. Sirius rose and walked calmly to the pedestal, though some uncertainty could be seen in his eyes.

"Sir, you aren't going to, you know..." Sirius made a crude gesture to his groin, eliciting a laugh from the classroom. Flitwick chuckled and shook his head.

"We save that for the real troublemakers. But, if you keep up the antics you had last year, I may just have to put the charm to use," he gave the rest of the Marauders a look. They all had the respect to look somewhat ashamed. "No matter, observe." Flitwick placed Sirius just so and placed an apple in his hand. He took a few steps back and raising his wand, he said, "Diffindo!" The apple sliced in two and fell apart in Padfoot's palm. He shrugged and took a bite of the experiment before nodding at the Professor.

"I'm glad you approve. Now please begin practice on the apple before you. Remember the motion; a smooth and quick flick of the wrist. The counter spell, reparo," With that, he jumped down from his stage and began to watch the class through beady eyes.

Kit was already smiling. Despite loving Professor Flitwick, Charms came so easily to her that the class required little concentration and allowed her to catch up on things with her friends. All five of the Marauders were quite adept at the subject, even Peter, who was less than astonishing in other classes, seemed to cast Charms with ease.

"So..." She began, waiting for someone to perk up with an idea.

Remus rolled his eyes and looked across the table at his friend. "Kit, it's the first day of classes. There isn't much to talk about. You already know what happened this summer." He cast a sly glance at Sirius who darkened noticeably. Kit laughed and nodded, her mirth making Sirius even angrier.

"Come on now guys, lets not tease poor Padfoot. Everyone has to get rejected once in their life." Even James couldn't keep a straight face and eventually burst out laughing. Sirius stood, glared at the lot of them and walked over to sit by Jamie Scotch, a cute Ravenclaw in their year. Kit scooted over to take his seat and watched as Sirius flirted with the girl.

"Now, watch as the Padfoot creature renders his prey defenceless with its signature attack, the bone melting smile." Remus caught on and nodded at Kit.

"Yes, we seen now as the prey is turned into a helpless puddle of mush,"

"And now he goes in for the attack..." James said, and the trio inhaled at the same time as Sirius leaned back in his chair and although they couldn't hear him, they all knew what he was saying.

"It's a shame that we haven't gotten to know each other yet. Maybe we could get better acquainted during lunch?" Kit mimicked in a low, suave voice. The girl across the aisle nodded while twirling her hair.

"And he's got the prey. Another defenceless creature met its doom because of Padfoot." Remus shook his head with mock-sadness. It wasn't the first time he'd seen Sirius get a girl with nothing more than a smile.

Apparently reading his mind, Kit rose an eyebrow. "Precisely why I don't want him near Rose." Kit could admit that Sirius was good looking. She could also admit that he was suave and very good at flirting. However, she would never in a million years let Sirius get his hands on Rose. Rosie was too nice, too pure, too forgiving. She was essentially everything Sirius wasn't. A cynical part of her mind realized that they would balance each other nicely. Oh, Merlin, no. Over her dead body.

When the bell rang, Kit found herself walking with the guys out to the hill by the greenhouses. The weather was nice enough to constitute sitting outside during the break. The sun was high in the sky and Kit sat back into the grass, rolling her sleeves up. She didn't know what class Rose had before the break and hadn't had a chance to ask her yet. She figured she was off with Diggory and the other Hufflepuffs she was no doubt friends with. Again, a pang went through her, one she knew was selfish. Just because she wanted Rose to stay friends with her didn't mean she had any right to keep her from other people. She settled into the grass and listened to the guys plan something for the following night.

"Don't you think it's a bit early?" Peter asked. "People only just arrived."

"Exactly, we want to let them know what they're in for." Kit could imagine Sirius rubbing his hands together, his mind working out some awful trick to play on the first years. She closed her eyes and began thinking of her own ideas. There was the classic of charging the first years to go to the washroom. They could also convince first years that the door to Filch's office was a secret passage out of the school. Or they could give blood lollipops out and say they were cherry flavoured.

Kit's musings were cut short when her sunlight was suddenly blocked and the Marauders stopped talking.

"Dennings," Sirius said, a certain amount of amusement colouring his voice. Kit opened her eyes and looked up at the blond standing at her feet.

"Eric!" She took his offered hand looked at the group over her shoulder. "I'll catch up with you in Muggle Studies?" she asked.

"Sure," Remus said as Peter nodded. Kit waved goodbye and walked away with Eric, her hand still in his.

"How's you day been so far?" she asked as they walked around the grounds.

"Busy. Transfiguration and Potions in the morning." He pointed to his bag which held four textbooks.

"I was not prepared to have Slughorn first thing in the morning." Kit sighed and put her hand on his arm. Beside her Eric laughed and nodded.

"It's a bit jarring, to say the least. But I can catch you on the way from Potions," he grinned.

"Catch me for what?" Kit asked. In answer, Eric kissed her lightly. Kit's eyes fluttered shut, her body reacting before her head had told it to. She returned the kiss with a little more insistence, surprising herself with the reaction. She'd never had a boyfriend before and he experience with guys went as far as making out with Hector Skorswik in the broom closet after a Quidditch match. She guessed her body knew more about kissing than her head did. Above her, Eric's chest rumbled with laughter as his arms wrapped around her waist. He pulled away but kept his hands on the small of her back. Looking at him, she wondered if she was blushing as much as he was. He looked down, his brown eyes hidden. Kit looked up at him with a smile floating across her lips.

"What are you embarrassed about?"

"You're going to think I'm so pathetic..."

"I promise I won't." Kit began to walk with him, shifting so they could walk side by side but he still held onto her waist.

He chuckled and shook his head. "I've been waiting to do that since our first date." Judging by his crimson face, Kit guessed he didn't mean the one yesterday. She smiled up at him, catching his eye.

"I don't think that's pathetic at all. I think it's cute."

Eric rolled his eyes and groaned. "Cute? Cute? Not romantic or handsome or sexy?" Kit laughed and told him it was simply cute. He raised a fist to the skies. "Damn you adorably good looks!" Kit doubled over with laughter at his display.

"Oh, yes. The horror!" Her voice was heavy with sarcasm as they neared her original spot. The Marauders were deep in conversation, but Kit didn't notice one of them looking over Sirius's shoulder at them.

"You should know something about that," Eric said while putting a hand on her cheek.

"Me?" Kit tried to ignore how nice it felt when his fingers brushed her skin. He opened his mouth to say something, then shut it again with a smile.

"You said to keep all that sort of talk for later on." Kit groaned and rolled her eyes. As they walked to get her things, she tried to fight the urge to ask him what he'd meant to say. As the bell rang, she finally blurted out the question. Dennings smiled at her as she rose and held a hand out to her.

"You're pint-sized but you have so much energy it's dizzying. Not to mention that haircut," his hand twirled a strand on her hair as they entered the castle, the Marauders just behind them. Kit, of course, was oblivious to their presence. "You're cute." Kit huffed at the word, but smiled all the same. She was surprised when he stayed by her side after they reached Muggle Studies.

"The class must have been too small, so they combined the sixth and seventh years." Eric seemed just as pleased about the news as she was. When the teacher opened the door, Kit rushed to get a good seat. Actually, as the rest of the class filtered in, the arrangement seemed perfect. The six of them sat in a group, Remus and Peter at the front, Kit and Eric behind them and James and Sirius in the rear. Professor Burbage began talking at the front of the class, her smile and tongue-in-cheek jokes making the class laugh. This class promised to be a great one.

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**Hey guys! Thanks for reading. . is having some computer difficulties, but we're both trying to work around them. I'm pumping out chapters and things are starting to get a bit more feisty! **

**.Dahlia**


	5. Chapter 5

James Potter was not in a good mood. The morning had been great, save for the fact that Pads would not stop teasing him about Kit, but it had been fine. He'd been partnered with Kit for Potions and they'd joked around in Charms. Then Dennings came along and now he was glaring at the back of the blond head as if he could cause Eric physical pain by simply wishing it. Where in the hell had he come from anyway? Kit hadn't been dating him yesterday, but suddenly they were holding hands? James didn't even want to think about what else they were doing. How could Kit, _his_ Kit even fallen for the guy? He was a sissy on the Quidditch pitch and spent his free time studying. Who liked those sorts of things in a guy?

James grunted and slipped lower into his seat, toying with the idea of flicking pieces of parchment at Dennings for the whole class. Something hit his own temple though, and he looked down to see a small knot of parchment. Sirius nodded at him as he unfolded it, motioning to something on his desk. _Notebook_ was all the parchment said, but James knew what Padfoot meant. Last year, they'd figured out how to charm their notebooks to write to one another. The words came up on everyone else's notebook and faded after a few seconds. In truth, they hadn't created the idea. There was an old book in the library they'd stumbled across and the last pages were covered in student-made spells from across the years. Shaking off the thought, James opened his notebook to the last page just as Sirius's scrawl appeared across the page.

_Something got your knickers in a twist?_

James shot his friend a disapproving look before writing back to him.

_Congratulations Pads, you're not an idiot._

James just wanted to get out of the class, he was not in the mood to be taunted by his friend. If there was one thing Sirius lacked it was the ability to know what he wasn't wanted.

_Remember, it's your fault you didn't get there first._

_It was your genius idea that she went to see Dennings in the first place._

_James, buddy, there's no need to get angry. Sirius rose an eyebrow at James._

_Sirius, buddy, shove off and go shag a first year._

_You really must hate Dennings._

Understatement James bit back the unjustified anger that surged through him. Rationally, it wasn't like he had a claim on her. He didn't own her and he couldn't make her do anything. But why couldn't she have just chosen him instead of the Chaser who never came to practice. James huffed and slammed his notebook shut, unaware that Kit had done just the same in front of him. Her hand snapped into the air suddenly with a little shout escaping her lips.

"Miss Ruskova?" Professor Burbage turned and fixed her with a concerned look.

"Yes, I completely forgot that I had a meeting with Dumbledore and my cousin." She was hastily packing her things up as she spoke, looking back at James and Sirius pointedly. "Actually, he said he wanted to speak with the group f us. Something about making Rose feel welcome..." Kit shrugged and stood up, motioned for the others to do the same. Eric sat back, confused at Kit's antics.

"Do you have a note from the Headmaster?"

"Funny thing about that, I forgot it back in my dorm. Sorry!" Kit all but ran from the room, James, Sirius, Remus and Peter following her as she flew across the cobbles.

"What on earth was that about?" Remus wheezed as she rounded a corner to come out onto the grounds.

"I promised Rosie I'd give her a tour during second period, but I completely forgot and now I'm late," Kit looked around and searched for the familiar blonde hair someone on the grass. Her heart stopped when she saw someone standing over Rose, the familiar mop of black hair and rigid posture obvious from her vantage point.

"Shit," Kit tossed her books down and ran at the pair, wand at the ready. Relieved to see that Rose was holding her own, Kit didn't notice as someone else flew past her to Rosie. Kit's vision narrowed and all she focused on was the fact that Regulus had tried to hurt her cousin. She'd seen his hand cover her mouth and his failed attempt to curse her, and now he was going to pay for it. Overprotective of her family, Kit saw red if any of them were harmed. She didn't have much family besides her parents, most of them were back in Russia, so she swore to protect what she had left. It was her responsibility to see that Rose was safe while she was at Hogwarts.

"What the bloody hell did you do to my cousin, Black?" Kit demanded, not waiting to hear his excuse before she silenced him. She didn't care what he thought he'd been doing. She kicked him in the stomach then picked his up and tried to beat his face in. She had a vendetta against Regulus anyway, so she finally had an excuse to hurt him. Regulus Black was everything Kit hated; he did everything in his power to make her life and the lives of those around her a living hell, he looked down on everybody and he expected he'd get everything just because he was rich. Beneath her fists, he was trying to protect himself, trying to get in a hit of his own. Kit may have been small, but she was fast, something Regulus should have known.

All too soon, hands came out to restrain her, to pull her back from her assault. She knew who it was before he spoke and she fought against him as Regulus felt his newly batter face.

"James Potter, you let me go! I'll kill him!" She thrashed about, but he held to strong and carried her away from Regulus.

"Damn it, Kit, you'll get yourself expelled!" James yelled at her, his cheeks high with colour. He didn't understand. She _had_ to protect Rose, she had to protect the people she loved. She was always the strong one, the one who did anything for her friends. She wasn't going to let some jackass push her cousin around. She'd raised to be strong, that was who she had always been.

"Kitty please? Please just leave him alone. Do not sink to his level…Please?"

Kit stopped abruptly, her fist falling to hang by her side. The air rushed out of her lungs and she simply hung onto James for a moment. He held her tightly and soothed her quietly.

"Kit, I understand. It's okay. But we all care about Rose, alright? We won't let anything hurt her." He let her go and gave her a small smile. Kit nodded, amazed at how his voice and those words calmed her furious mood. A slow burn was still in her gut, but it was pushed away for the moment, her focus instead on her cousin.

"Alright Rosie, but he will pay. And don't you try and stop me. None of you!" She put a hand on Rose's cheek, Rose seeing the cold truth in her eyes. Spoken as a joke, Kit had meant what she said; there was no way Regulus was getting away with just a busted lip and a broken nose. Not a chance.

Rose was already arm in arm with Peter and walking up the hill before Kit had a chance to ask her what class she'd skipped. Remus wondered out loud she recovered so quickly, earning a shake of the head from everybody. Kit smiled, though, and rose her eyebrows.

"She learnt it from me, obviously." Kit joked and began to walk back to the castle, very aware that they had left Regulus paralyze at the lake. Someone would find him.

Eventually, someone did and there had been hell to pay because of it. He walked into the Great Hall the next day with his face just as Kit had left it. He glared daggers at her from the Slytherin table, but the effect was lost when he could barely open one eye. However, the effect of Slughorn's rotund belly appearing in front of Kit at breakfast had the desired reaction.

"Miss Ruskova, may I speak with you a moment." His moustache quivered as he spoke. Kit spun on her bench and look up at him.

"Sure, Professor." She said, but stayed seated, trying to act nonchalant. She knew why he wanted to talk, but she planned on postponing it as long as humanly possible.

"In my office." He turned and led the way, not waiting for her to gather her books or send a quick glance to her friends.

"Piece of cake, no worries." She told a nervous looking Rose with a quick squeeze on her shoulder. The great thing about following Slughorn was that he walked so slowly, Kit could afford to take her time with her goodbyes.

The click of the dungeon door closing was ominous and despite her earlier words, Kit wasn't so sure it would be a piece of cake. She just had to be sure to keep her anger in check and it should go smoothly.

"I assume you know why you're here."

"Yes, sir. Yesterday, I had a bit of a disagreement with Black."

Slughorn huffed from his desk. "'Little disagreement'? Katherine, you practically beat his head in!"

_He deserved it and maybe if he could actually throw a punch, he wouldn't look so awful. _"Sir, it was about something very important to me. Did he come to you when it happened?"

"I found him, immobilized by the lake with a broken nose. Miss Roskova, regardless of what your chat was about, I cannot let this act of violence go unpunished. Detention for two months. Staring tonight."

"What!" Kit screeched, her hands balling up. "Sir, with all due respect, I'll miss the Quidditch tryouts."

"Yes, I am aware of that. Perhaps that will teach you to understand the consequences of your actions."

"But Professor-" Kit began, a rare pleading in her voice.

"Katherine, I know how important it is to you, and as an avid fan, I hate to do this. But you must learn that all your actions have repercussions." His chair squeaked as he sat in, groaning under the weight. Kit grabbed her things roughly.

"But Potter is the Quidditch captain. Maybe he'll make an exception for you?" Kit slammed the door shut without replying. It wasn't worth it to try and explain anything to Slughorn. He couldn't deal with hearing his dear Slytherin's had done something wrong. Her excruciatingly boring detention began that night, her only job was to clean every cauldron without magic and organize the ingredients cupboard every night. Organizing was the worst because she'd just finished arranging everything one night and the next morning it was all over the place again. Her became more and more sour each day until she was near volatile. The knowledge that she might not be on the Quidditch team was ruining her mood the most.

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Wrapped up in her own little word of hate for Slughorn and general dislike of everything else, Kit didn't realize Remus was getting sick until Rose asked her about it one night in the library. They'd agreed to meet after Kit's detention and work on their homework together. So far, Kit had accomplished nothing save for turning the parchment for her essay into paper ammo.

"Kit, why is Remus so sick?"

Kit looked up then around to see if anyone was near. Pleased that there wasn't, she scooted across the table to sit beside Rose.

"So you noticed huh?" Kit lowered her voice to a whisper, knowing that Rose already knew but needed some help remembering. "Do you remember what I told you in my letters? No need to worry Rosie, this happens every _month_." Kit rose her eyebrows until Rose's face became clear. then she started spewing questions about whether he was alright and if there was anything she could do. Kit tried to slow her down, let her know that Remus was very sensitive about his problem, but rose was already out the door. Kit muttered oaths under her breath as she stuffed her thing haphazardly into her bag. This wasn't going to end well, she could tell by the icy ball of dread forming in her stomach. The little spark of anger that had been triggered by Regulus and gather fuel from a month's worth of detentions was growing as she ran down the corridor and into the hospital wing. Throwing the curtains back on the cot reserved for Remus, Kit found Rose.

"You. Are Fast." Kit gasped for air, oblivious to Rose's gestures of warning. Kit looked at her suspiciously, ignoring the glare she was getting from Remus to ask Rose what the hell she was doing. But as Rose tried to get something across with her eyes, Kit looked down at Remus and recoiled.

"Hey Moony, why the death glare?"

"You told Rose about my problem in _second year_?" Kit jumped, her gaze swiveling to Rose.

"Traitor!" She hissed before turning to Remus, trying to stay calm. "Well you know I tell her everything! And besides I was young and I trust her with everything."

"And that excuses you from telling my biggest secret to a complete stranger?" Remus yelled, his pale face flushed.

Kit groaned, the resolve to stay calm almost snapping. "No it doesn't mate but I did. Besides you would have told her eventually right? This saves time, pain and she's treating you liking a king!" Her words were strained with the effort and part of her just wanted to snap and lash out on him. Just let him have it, take out all her frustrations on him. But she resisted the urge and took a deep breath.

"Listen mate I'm sorry alright? Forgive me?" Again, her voice wasn't quite believable to those who knew her really well, but Remus caught her tone and put up the facade. He was just as angry as she was, but they both knew this wasn't the time.

Kit watched everyone relax and laugh along with Rose. She was happy that Rose felt comfortable and that everyone accepted her, but what she'd just done was going to kill Kit. Rose hadn't know Remus long enough to know that he was great at feigning happiness, so how was she to know that the smile plastered on his face was anything but sincere? Kit knew him and she felt herself back away from the group. Even James and Sirius, despite their joking, sent glances at Kit, pity in their eyes. Making a lame excuse about homework and a date with Eric, Kit slipped from the room.

She waited in the common room, pacing for hours, her finger wound tightly into her hair. She shouldn't have told Rose, not without Remus' permission. And her betrayal had cut him deep. He hated when people found out about his furry problem, he assumed that his friends

would leave him without a second thought. And despite her efforts, all their efforts, to make him see differently, that was one opinion he wouldn't change. Kit groaned and flopped into the overstuffed couch. A tiny burst of anger flared at Rose, who hadn't so much as thought about the consequences before she ran off to see Remus. Rose wanted to help people, but sometimes her kind heart overstepped her own reach. If she had stayed for just one moment longer before running off, Kit could have warned her about what to say and what not to. She was angry at Rose for not thinking, she was angry at Regulus and Slughorn, and angry was an understatement for what she felt for Remus. Everything had just built up over the month, and Kit was reaching the breaking point.

She ran her hands over her hair, the short locks standing up in all directions as the portrait swung open. James, Sirius, Peter and Rose came in laughing and smiling at each other. Kit returned the grins, albeit a bit tightly. James ducked down to her from behind the couch and fixed her with a quick sombre look.

"Remus wants to talk with you," he whispered, patting her shoulder before going off with the rest of the gang. Kit nodded, taking a steadying breath before walking to the Hospital Wing. Try and make it though, Katherine, try.

Remus was sitting up in his bed, his foul mood tainting the air. Kit rushed over to him, her hands held in surrender. She vowed not to yell first.

"Moony, please, you've got to understand-"

"You had no right to tell Rose anything."

"I know I didn't. But, Remus, she'd my best friend and four years ago I had no idea she would ever come to Hogwarts."

"Regardless, Kit, this isn't something you run around and tell everyone."

"I told one person!" Kit anger flared with Remus'. "Who, by the way, seemed to take it quite well. Last time I checked, you didn't mind her waiting on you."

"It should be_ my_ decision to tell someone, not yours. This is my problem and despite what you and the others think, having people know about it doesn't help! Because you all still judge me for it, I can tell."

A silence struck Kit, a hollow feeling in her chest. Remus fumed from his bed, not realizing what he'd just said.

"You think that after six years of knowing you as a person, we think you're a monster?" She couldn't believe it! They'd accepted him, regardless of what happened when the full moon came out. "You think we're so shallow as to judge you?"

Remus looked away, but his silence was enough. "Yes. Because it's been like that for my whole life. Everyone says they're fine with it, but I can tell. They flinch when I'm angry, they stay away when the moon gets full." She'd heard the same speech before, but this time it wasn't a whine. His voice was harsh, like Kit was the one to blame.

"Remus, you are so thick-headed sometimes! You really think that?"Kit threw her hands in the air with a huff, the next words flying out of her mouth before she could think them through."Fine. You are a monster. Nothing but a cold-hearted killer. A freak." She turned away from him and stormed out of the Hospital Wing, nerves red-hot with anger.

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**Hi there! Thanks for reading and I would love to hear what you think about this story. There are a few things that should be cleared up before the other chapters get posted. This is a slight AU story, so Lucius Malfoy will be at Hogwarts with Kit, but a year older. **

**Also, this fic isn't for people who love Lily Evans. She and Kit got off on the wrong foot and since it is mainly Kit's thoughts, don't expect her to be too kind to the read-head. One chapter coming up has blatant Lily-bashing. Sorry if it upsets you.**

**.Potter  
**


	6. Chapter 6

The next few weeks had been rough for Kit. She was still angry about what had happened last night and she was still wound up about the detentions. She snapped at first years who were in her way as she stomped into the Great Hall for breakfast. Her shoes clicked on the stone floor as she passed the Marauders without a glance. It wasn't her fault Remus couldn't see past his stupid furry problem and Rose needed to learn to keep her mouth shut. Kit ignored them as she found Eric a few people away and sat next to him. Greeting him with a quick kiss, she curled into his side and began to pick things for breakfast.

"Why aren't you sitting with your friends?" He asked, though he was far from disappointed.

"I wanted to sit with you this morning." Kit fibbed. She did want to spend more time with Eric, but the fact that she'd had a fight with Remus last night was convenient.

Eric looked at her suspiciously, knowing that the so call Marauders were near inseparable, but put his hands up in defeat. "I'm not complaining," he said and wrapped his long arms around her waist. There was a bang at the other end of the table, then the sound of someone storming off. Kit didn't raise her eyes, but knew James had all but ran from the room. There was the patter of feet following them and Kit looked up quickly only to see Rose standing at the door, eyes brimming with tears. Sirius put an arm around her waist, making any guilt Kit felt disappear. They all left and a stunning silence fell over the Great Hall. It only lasted for a moment before the scrape of cutlery and anxious conversation began. Kit squirmed uneasily, but Eric turned her and put a hand on her cheek.

"They'll come around, no matter what happened." He brushed his fingers across her skin with a smile. "Until then, I get you all to myself." He gently kissed her forehead.

"Ready for another day of Slughorn hell?" he asked as they walked together to class.

Kit groaned and put her head against his shoulder. "Don't remind me. I've already got detention from him as well."

"Kit! It's the second day of school!"

"You're honestly surprised?" she asked, leaning against the wall as the rest of the class filed in.

Eric grinned in admittance. "Not in the least," he gave her a squeeze goodbye then left for his own class. Kit entered the room, her hands unconsciously forming fists as she walked to her table. She hadn't sat down yet when Remus put his arms around her.

"I'm sorry. I was caught off guard." He said into her hair. She laughed a little and pulled away. "I think we were both a little wound up." He looked over at Rose and sighed. "My hissy fit was uncalled for." Her eyebrows rose at the term "hissy fit", but she sat down beside James without comment. A thought occurred to her and she spun to hit Sirius in the arm.

"Touch my cousin again, and you'll end up like your brother." She threatened, but couldn't keep from smiling. It felt too strange to be away from her friends for any length of time. All their emotion ran high at times and more often than not, things were said. But it never took very long for the fight to be resolved and things to go back to normal. The only problem was that Kit was notorious for holding grudges, sometimes unconsciously. It was probably one of the few stereotypical female thing she did; drag up previous fights and mishaps during an argument. It bothered Sirius to no end since she was able to drag up every mistake he'd ever made when she lost her patience with him.

But Kit fighting with Sirius was inevitable and something Kit couldn't live without. Every time they had a fight, they were closer afterwards, like the fight had cleared the air between them. Behind her, Sirius, Remus and Peter had begun talking about the Quidditch tryouts. Her heart sunk when she realized she hadn't told James about her detentions yet.

"Hey, James?" She asked, half-turning to look at him. He looked down at her, his hazel eyes shining from behind his glasses. He had apparently heard the conversation, because he began rambling on about the new season and who he was going to ask to play. He said that tryouts were going to be packed with second years, and probably none with any talent. His gaze darkened when he said Dennings was going to try out. Kit grumbled beside him, but before she could say anything, Slughorn had begun the lesson.

A cauldron was perched at the front of the classroom, but Kit couldn't see inside of it. A strange aroma met her nose; wet grass, the smell of brooms and a salty smell she couldn't place. It was familiar, so familiar that she couldn't place it. It was salty mixed with something else that tickled her nose. Beside her, James shifted and moved to sit closer to her. She didn't notice him until his hand reached behind her to use the back of her chair as leverage. He tipped back in his chair, smiling at her nonchalantly.

Someone said that the potion was Amortentia, which made Kit start. Since when were they studying love potions? Then, with a snort, she thought of Sirius and James having to deal with the same problem they'd had when the third years learned enchanting charms. Rolling her eyes, Kit forced herself to listen to what Slughorn was saying.

"While we most likely won't be making Amortentia, it is important to know which ingredients make the love potion work. On the board you will see a list of _only_ the ingredients. By the end of class I would like you to classify each item and explain its significance in the potion."

Kit groaned and hung her head, flipping through her textbook moodily. She hoped no one was going to the ingredient cupboard; she'd spent over three hours cleaning it last night. But as she thought about the rows upon rows of jars she'd been stacking, she remembered that Slughorn had given her a parchment to show her how to organize the jars. The ingredients were sorted according to use in a potion. So, naturally there was a section devoted to things that affected the sense, and within that, ones that altered the brain. Kit grudgingly admitted that maybe the detention was good for something. As she began to scribble her answers down, using her textbook often to double check, James watched her in amazement.

"What happened to you? I thought you were the "I can't do potions" Kit," he looked down at his own paper that was near empty.

"I am capable of learning some things, you know. Detention wasn't worthless, I suppose." Kit continued to write, flicking through her textbook.

"Detention? Since when do you have detention?"

"Slughorn, for about a month and a half now." Kit looked down at her notes, hoping not to make a scene.

"You'll miss Quidditch tryouts!" His hissed, loud enough to get the attention of Sirius.

"What? How in the hell am I supposed to flirt with girls in the stands if no one is there to pick up my slack?" He pouted, leaning over his desk to pop his head between James and Kit.

"I don't know, maybe you could actually play for once?" Kit suggest, which earned her a raspberry in return. "When's your detention?"

"After dinner, until curfew. And before you ask, it was for beating up Regulus." Kit felt Sirius growl and put a hand up to stop him. "Trust me, next time I'll make sure not to get caught."

"I could hold the tryouts at lunch," James offered, but shook his head when he realized how many people were going to come out. "A weekend?" He suggested, but Kit shook her head.

"Slytherin and Ravenclaw already have the pitch booked the weekend Quidditch starts." Kit looked back at Sirius, asking how he knew.

"Regulus doesn't stop talking about it and that cute Ravenclaw from Charms is a chaser." Kit rolled her eyes, not wanting to know where he'd taken her to learn that tidbit of information. Judging by the wolfish grin, they'd spent a bit of time together in abandoned classroom yesterday. Ew, and precisely why Sirius was never going to get married. Ever.

The class dragged on, but at last the bell rang and they were set free. Apparently someone had spread the word about love potions because there was a swarm of girls at the door, ready and waiting for the guys. Every girl in the class had to push, shove and elbow her way through, while the guy simply moved their arms and a path was cleared. Well, only three guys could that. Sirius, Amos and even James. there were shouts of dates, hopeless girls telling Sirius that they'd be perfect together. Kit even spied a few first years. Unable to resist the urge, she ducked down to one of them (though some were taller than she was) and whispered something to her about Sirius. The girl's eyes widened and Kit nodded. She ran off to tell her friends and Kit didn't feel the slightest bit guilty. Smirking, she saw as James and Sirius finally detached themselves from the crowd. Kit was just signing a piece of preachment when they walked over. James eyed it curiously as she handed it off to a first year Ravenclaw. The poor guy was shaking, probably unsure what to do around all the girls. She told him to go to the greenhouses and get the note to the pretty blond girl that was there.

"What was that about?" he asked as they walked to charms.

"Just getting a note to Rosie." Kit said and was about to turn the corner when a familiar hand reached for her waist.

"Don't tell me you were going to leave without saying hi," Eric laughed as she turned to face him.

"Slipped my mind," she said, looking up at him with a pretty smile.

"You are an awful girlfriend. What am I going to do with you?" He chuckled, and Kit felt his chest rumble. It made her smile unconsciously. He ducked down and gave her a quick peck on the lips and she wished him luck with Slughorn.

"Hey!" She called after him as he walked to Potions. "If you can convince Slughorn to let me off detention, I'd be eternally grateful."

Eric smiled, his white teeth showing and shrugged. "I'll do my best."

Kit turned away from him, a smile lighting up her face. She bit her lip, trying to hold it back, but she couldn't do it. After so long of not having a boyfriend (never having a boyfriend), it felt more than amazing to finally be with someone. If she was being honest, she'd forgotten how nice it was to have someone to hold and kiss. A blush crept up her neck as she all but ran to Charms, leaving a furious James in her wake.

"Prongs," Sirius said carefully. But James seemed to stand still for a moment, only his chest moving as he breathed. Muscles in his jaw twitched as his hands closed into fist. Remus put a hand on his shoulder and started pushing him to the Charms class room.

"C'mon, Prongs. Just make it through lunch." James walked into the class stoically. The rest of the Marauders wondered how much longer James could last before snapping. James took his usual seat beside Kit, Peter on her other side and Remus and Sirius beyond him. Without saying anything, Sirius and Remus opened their notebooks and began a rapid conversation.

_Why is he so upset?_ Remus wrote.

_Kit's dating Dennings._ Sirius wrote back and Remus fought the urge to smack him.

_I know that. I meant why is it bothering him so much? He didn't act like this when Wendy started dating Kent._ James had a thing for a girl named Wendy in his fourth year. He asked her out nearly everyday and every time she said no. James wasn't put off, not even when she started dating Kent Wallbar, the beater on the Ravenclaw quidditch team.

_Maybe Kit's different to him. You know, as a friend too. _Remus had to give him credit, sometimes Sirius had his moments. Despite saying he knew everything about women (and many times being shown he was wrong), Sirius knew about his friends.

_You think it's just because she's a friend?_

_I'm not sure. It's one thing James won't talk about._

Remus looked at Sirius, concern for their friend evident.

_It must be serious._

Charms was steadily getting harder and Kit was thankful that she was gifted in the subject. More than once, Peter had to be given special attention to learn a spell. Kit felt back for Wormtail since it drew so much attention to him and he often turned an unflattering shade of puce. The same could be said for him when faced with a woman, a guy bigger than he was, or a difficult exam question. She felt especially bad when she realized that he was the only one falling behind in the subject. As the bell rang, she waited for him and let James and the other go ahead.

"Hey, Kit," he said quietly. His round face was still blotchy and his watery blue eyes held disappointment.

"Charms is hard this year, huh?"

"Not to you or anyone else." His pouted, making Kit reached out and bump his shoulder with her own. One of the great things about being around Peter was that he wasn't as freakishly tall as James, Remus or Sirius.

"Well, if you wanted some help with that, I'd be happy to help." Kit paused just outside the arch to the grounds and thought. She would rather spend her free time with Eric and between homework and detention and the upcoming Quidditch season (hopefully), there wouldn't be much free time to speak of.

"Actually, Rosie is great at Charms. Fantastic even, nice to boot. And," she shared a conspiratorial look with Peter as they stepped into the sun. "I'd much rather she be around someone I can trust than Diggory."

Peter nodded as he considered her offer. "You'd be okay with that?"

"More than okay! Wormtail, I can trust you, right?" Kit put a hand on each of his shoulders and looked into his eyes. He nodded fervently, to which she smiled and sent him off. He walked with a new bounce in his step, but whether it was from the idea of doing well at Charms, being with her very pretty cousin, or having Kit's permission to do so, Kit didn't know but she was happy to see him happy. He went off to the rest of the Marauders and sat by them under the non-whomping willow tree. Not seeing Eric anywhere, Kit joined them. Sirius had smuggled some food from the kitchen that morning and was snacking away at some pastries that were going to be served at lunch. Kit held her hand out and he ripped a danish in half, but just before she could taken it from his outstretched hand, he licked the top of it in one go.

"Ew! Eugh, Black, you are so immature," Kit pushed the snack back at him, rolling her eyes when he stuffed it in his mouth. He smiled around the pastry, his grey eyes full of amusement. She couldn't help but smile in return, even if he was gross and immature.

"Why aren't you with Eric?" Peter asked suddenly. Sirius and Remus both glared at Peter from behind Kit. James didn't appear to be any different but he was now watching Kit very closely. Unsure about the sudden change in atmosphere, Kit shrugged.

"I don't know where he is. 'Sides, I wanted to sit with you guys," Kit smiled at them and behind her back, Sirius gave James and meaningful look. He grinned back, albeit a bit tightly, but it was an improvement.

Kit sat back and looked about the grounds, wondering where Rose was. Her thoughts drifted as a cool breeze swept by, trying to bring winter in. It certainly wasn't hot anymore. It was barely warm on the good days and early in the morning frost began to paint her window. She tugged her sweater closer around her and hoped Muggle Studies was warm.

As it happened, it was pleasantly warm. Apparently Professor Burbage knew what the weather was like and adjusted her class room accordingly. Kit really liked Burbage; she was a younger teacher who still remembered what it was like to be a student. So she didn't assign essays over the weekends unless necessary and kept the class fun, something that had seemed impossible with something as dreary as Muggle Studies. But Kit actually enjoyed the lessons, even if half of the things taught flew over her head.

Eric's father was a muggle, so he knew a bit about how muggle things worked. When Professor Burbage started talking about the telephone, Kit automatically turned to Eric. He laughed at her confusion, but helped her understand (to an extent) what it was.

The only person who didn't seem to enjoy muggle studies was James. His parents were very accepting of everyone, so it wasn't because he thought the study was beneath him. He just seemed cold during that class. Kit tried to partner with him, but he'd turned to Sirius as she opened her mouth. Whatever it was, Kit tried to ignore it. But what she couldn't ignore were the scribbles in the back of her notebook. Notes passed between Sirius and James and Remus about her and Eric, James expressing his dislike for Kit's boyfriend. Kit shook her shoulders and told herself it didn't mean anything. He just didn't like her spending all her time with Eric. There was nothing else to it, was there? Kit couldn't handle thinking about what James may have been feeling while she was with Eric. It just made her feel guilty. So, she put the notes in the back of her mind and made it through the day. She needed to have a clear head when she talked to Rose.

That night fell quickly and after a wonderful dinner, Kit walked slowly down to the dungeon. Her fingers were cramped from scrubbing for so long and she could already imagine the state of disarray the potions cupboard was in. And she had to get out of detention an hour early today to meet with Rose. She pushed open the heavy door and saw that Professor Slughorn was waiting for her, as was a pile of cauldrons. She pushed up her sleeves and bent to collect the cleaning potion from the cupboard.

"Professor?" She asked as the last cauldron was finally clean and before she went to work on the closet.

"Yes, Miss Ruskova," He shuffled through a stack of parchments she recognized as their assignment from that day.

"I was hoping I could leave an hour early tonight." She saw his eyebrows raise and she hastened to explain herself.

"I wouldn't ask if it wasn't an emergency. My cousin, Rosalinda, hasn't been feeling well at all. Homesick, you see. And she wanted me to be with her before curfew." She saw his mind working. Rose was an excellent student, smart and attentive and good at Potions. If Kit was a betting girl, she would have said Rose was maybe a day from being invited to one of his parties. Kit had been once when he saw her Charm four students into the air. But Kit hadn't been back since then. Sirius and James had been invited too, but neither of them wanted to leave Remus and Peter. The more Kit thought about it, the more she realized being in Slughorn's "club" had little to do with talent and more to do with money. She, James and Sirius all came from wealthy families and they all had family members with prominent jobs or grand accomplishments. Kit didn't want to be known because she had money, or her father was one of the most gifted healers London had ever seen.

Besides, that cow Lily Evans was part of the club.

Slughorn let out a sigh, his moustache quivering as he did and Kit knew she needed more of a push.

"Well, if Rose isn't feeling well, she won't come to class. Maybe even go home." Kit stretched her mouth into a frown and lifted her shoulders. "And I hear you're planning another party, and it would be a shame if she couldn't make-"

"Yes, yes, go on. make sure she'd alright. Give her my regards," And with that she was all but pushed from the door. Kit couldn't help but do a little dance once the heavy door was shut. Way easier than had been expected, but she knew the same excuse wouldn't work twice. She checked her watch as she walked down to the common room, noting happily that she was early and had a few minutes to waste. When the portrait swung open, she had to push past a group of first years to get to the Marauders.

"Oh, there's Sirius Black," one girl sighed, the rest of the females in her group turning to look at him as he laughed with James.

"He is so dreamy," Apparently the boys in the little crowd weren't too pleased, as one of them crossed his arms in a huff.

"I hear he walks around in chick's underwear at night."

"I heard he wore make up too." The two guys looked at each other as if to say, "who could like a guy who did that?" Kit hid her own smile; she'd been the one to start those rumours that morning in Potions. It was too great an opportunity to pass up. Smirking, Kit stayed near the door as the rumour was passed around the common room, and eventually everyone was watching him out of the corner of their eye.

"I'd kill for a guy that was that sure of himself,"

Kit choked and coughed, unable to believe her ears. As if he knew what had happened, Sirius let out a barking laugh and winked at Kit. She stormed over and muttered under her breath.

"What happened?" Remus asked, putting his essay aside.

"I told some girl this morning that Pads liked to prance around his ladies underwear at night in the hopes of deflating that massive ego," she shot him a look. "Apparently, ever girl in the room is looking for a guy "that sure of himself." I don't believe it," Sirius laughed again, then stretched his arms above his head and sunk into the couch.

"Well, Kit, when you are this devastatingly handsome, it's hard to turn anybody off of this," he looked down at himself as if he was a sex god or something. Kit whacked him on the head with her potions textbook.

"Of course. Pure animal magnetism?" She asked sarcastically, to which he nodded. Rolling her eyes, Kit sank back into the couch, her arms tucked behind her head.

"You don't have homework?" Remus asked, his own pile surprisingly large.

"I'm leaving in a few minutes to meet with Rosie. Not worth it to get started." Peter and Sirius both perked at the news of Rose being near. Kit smiled at Peter and smacked Sirius. "I mean it Black. No funny stuff with Rose." He lifted his hands in surrender, but he had a wolfish grin she didn't trust. Great, now he had an idea. Kit checked her watch and stood, Sirius following her with Peter on his tail.

"Peter, you can ask her later, this is kind of private." She turned to Sirius and put her hand up. "And, no."

"But you don't even know what-"

"Still no,"

"Kit," he whined.

"Sirius," she whined back and was out the door before he could catch up with her. Rose was standing nervously a few feet away and Kit went to meet her when something flew past her. Not a moment later, Sirius was in front of her, one arm braced against the wall. Even though Kit could only see his back, she knew he was using the knee-melting smile and probably playing with her hair. Kit ran to stand between them and gave Sirius a push.

"Out," she instructed, looking over her shoulder at Rose. "Sorry about that. He doesn't understand that no actually means no." But Kit saw something in her cousin's face and she stopped. Oh, no. It couldn't be, but even as Kit blinked at looked at Rose again, she could see it. That look they all got. Bleary eyed, and there was a longing in her gaze as the portrait closed.

"First of all, Sirius Black is trouble." Rose went to say something, but Kit pushed through. "I mean it. Be friends, I can't stop you from that, because he has his moments as a friend. But do not get into the dangerous territory of a relationship."

"Katherine, why are you so worried about Sirius and I?" Kit pointedly ignored the term 'Sirius and I' and instead answered her question.

"Because, he leaves a trail of broken hearts. I don't want you to become part of that."

"Kit, I know you want to protect me, but I am not a child."

"I know you aren't. You're the same age as me, and I know that. But, Rosie, you don't know anything about how things work around here. You think Sirius is a sweet guy because you've only just gotten to know him. I've spent six years trying to get him to understand that girls are more than shag partners. I don't want you becoming one of them."

"Kit, I can make my own decisions,"

Kit rolled her eyes, patience wearing thin. "I know you can, and at Durmstrang, you probably knew the ins and outs of how to behave. But this school is different, all right? Just take some time to get used to things before you do anything."

"Like what?" Rose asked, her voice getting sharper. They were walking on thin ice now; both Kit and Rose had a temper with which to be reckoned.

"Like jumping into a relationship with Amos Diggory, for a start." Initially, Kit hadn't had a problem with Amos. He was a nice guy, smart, kind. Hell, he was a Hufflepuff for Merlin's sake. But he was just like Sirius, if a little kinder when he dumped his girlfriends.

"Me jumping into a relationship? What about that blond boy you make out with?" Rose huffed, narrowing her eyes at her small cousin.

"That's what I'm talking about! I don't 'make-out' with Eric. You don't even know what you're talking about half the time, Rose. And he's my boyfriend, for your information."

Rose crossed her arms. "Oh, so you're allowed to jump into a relationship, but I'm not?"

"Rosie, I known him for six years. I'd hardly call it jumping into a relationship."

"Well, I don't want you dating him," Rose turned up her nose and rose an eyebrow at her cousin. So they were going to play that game.

"You can't tell me who I can and cannot date!"

"Then you can't tell me who not to date."

"I'm doing it for your protection, Rose."

"Katherine, I know you want to protect everybody, I know you don't want to lose anyone else," Kit's eyes flashed dangerously, but Rose continued slowly. "But I can make my own decisions. Let me prove to you that I can."

Curious, Kit relaxed a little and eyed Rose. "How so?"

"Let me have a week without your guidance, let me get my own bearings of Hogwarts. If I'm still making mistakes past that point, then feel free to correct me." Rose held out her hand, to make the deal official. Kit considered for a moment then shook her hand. After a second, she pulled her into a hug.

"Sorry, I just don't want to see you get hurt."

"I know, Kit. I know."

* * *

**You know the drill. I would love to hear what you think of the story thus far**. **Leave a review if you wish. **

**I own a number of things; Harry Potter is not among them, sadly. **

**Dahlia  
**


	7. Chapter 7

Rose began to walk towards the Gryffindor common room, but Kit pulled her away. Yes, she had agreed to let Rose do what she wanted without interference, but that didn't mean she would let Rose waltz into Sirius's lap where, she would no doubt, end up. Damn, maybe this deal with Rose wasn't such a great idea. She turned back to tell Rose to rethink the whole plan when she was suddenly in front of the portrait with an impatient and very proud looking Rose. Kit muttered the password and walked in. Her nervous state of mind lessened when Rose stopped to admire the common room, forcing Kit to do the same.

Something a akin to a home, she thought. She knew every nook a cranny, where the cool parts were in the summer and the warm parts in the winter. She knew the comfiest spots on the couch and the best hiding spots, should they need to stash something. Kit felt calmer now as she found the familiar babble of sound and warmth of the room. She walked ahead of Rose and tried to tell Sirius with her eyes to back off tonight, Of course, it was lost on him, but Kit took a breath and plopped down next to James. She lifted her feet onto his lap with a smile and watched as Rose tumbled into Sirius' lap. There was a tense silence, where the Marauders paused to judge the reaction. Expecting an explosion, it was odd to hear Rose speak before Kit yelled or screamed or attacked.

"Is alright. Katherine has agreed to let me do what I wish this week." Rose said, and every head swiveled to Kit, who nodded. She was still glaring at Sirius, but at least she hadn't moved or taken her wand out. Instead, she turned to James and asked for his help with something.

"I've used my last believable excuse on Slughorn, so I'll need something spectacular to get out for Quidditch." James leaned in and they began planning a heist. Remus paused his work to lend a hand in the plan. The three lost track of everything, as they so often did when planning a prank, so they didn't notice when Rose got up to help Peter. Kit did notice, however, the sudden look on longing on Sirius' face as she left. Rolling her eyes, she put it down to he had an itch he couldn't scratch and wanted to Rose of fix it. Gross. But when Rose pulled Peter into the small clearing in front of the fire, everyone stopped and watched the mini lesson.

"Peter, I want you to jinx me." Just about everyone jumped up from their seats, shouting at the obscene idea. Kit looked ready to use a few jinxes of her own, but James held her down.

"Rosie I'm not sure that's such a great idea." He said, for as much Rose's sake as Kit's.

The blonde shook her head and waved him off. "Nonesense. When you're ready Peter."

If Kit was being honest, part of her was really proud that Rose was doing this. Of course, she'd suggested the whole thing, but she felt proud as her cousin kicked Peter's behind a number of times. She did feel bad that Peter wasn't doing quite so well, but Rose got to show the boys that she was someone to be reckoned with. However, once the lesson turned intellectual, Kit lost interest and went back to her conversation with James.

"So, what do you suggest, Prongs?" The sudden use of his nickname reminded Kit that Rose didn't know about them being Animagi. A story for another day, she supposed.

"Well, you could always fake being sick," Kit pulled a face at his suggestion. She'd been hoping for something more dramatic.

"That's all you've got?" She asked, tapping his temple. He averted his eyes, the bright hazel hidden by his lashes. "You okay?" she asked, ducked her head to try and look at him.

"Yeah, I'm fine." He lifted his eyes, a brighter than before as he shook off whatever he'd been feeling. "So you want dramatic?" And another round of planning began. At one point, it involved three broomsticks, Fluffy the dog, and a sack of potatoes. The plans became more and more absurd the later it became, and soon Kit found her eyelids getting heavy. James moved at some point in their planning to sit right beside her. She hadn't thought anything of it at the time, but now that she was tired she noticed that James was quite comfortable. As she fell asleep, James moved to lie her down on the couch. The selfish part of him kept him there, lying by her, quite content to spend the night like that. Carefully, he moved his arm to wrap around her waist, overjoyed when not only did she not move away, but snuggled closer to him. Eventually he fell asleep too, with Kit pressed close against him.

* * *

It wasn't until the morning that trouble started brewing. Kit stirred a little as she slowly woke. She was far to comfortable to consider moving. As she opened her eyes slowly, she saw the fireplace, now gone cold, and Rose sleeping in the armchair. Ignoring the fact she was wearing Sirius' jersey, she tried to sit up. that's when she felt the arm around her waist. Eyes flying open, she whipped her head around to see James, fast asleep beside her. She screamed, much to loudly than should be legal in the morning and ran up the stairs to her dorm. The girls were still asleep, except Evans, who was probably already in the library. Kit threw herself onto her bed and covered her head with her pillow.

It was just a fluke, they'd just fallen asleep on the same couch. Oh, Merlin, had Eric seen? Why did it matter if Eric saw, it wasn't like she and James were sleeping together. Okay, technically, they had been, but not in that way! But she didn't feel anything for James besides friendship, so it didn't matter. It wasn't the first time she'd been with one of the guys and they'd all fallen asleep. And Kit had almost won her internal argument when she suddenly placed that salty smell from the amortentia potion.

"Oh, hell," she whispered, covering her eyes. And James had looked adorable with his glasses askew. And he hadn't tried anything while she'd been asleep, which was more than she could say for certain people she knew. Kit hung her head and groaned. Well, this just mucked up everything.

Her nerves were too worked up to stay in bed all day, so she dressed in a hurry, thankful that she didn't have to worry about a uniform today. She got downstairs and realized that she'd thrown on one of James' old white shirts. It wasn't that noticeable to anyone else, save for the fact that it was obviously a men's button down. But it still made Kit a bit uncomfortable when she ran into anyone, like they knew what she'd done last night. But she hadn't done anything, she told herself firmly and rounded a corner with more force than needed. She ran head first into someone, who sneered down at her.

"Malfoy, I don't have the time," Kit said, not noticing the other Slytherins as she tried to pass.

"Is that any way to greet someone," he said, as if he was the epitome of manners.

"I'm sorry, honourable lord of pompous tits and slime. How is your morning?" Kit bowed before turning to Snape, who was never very far behind. "And morning to you, you great ball of pus. Discovered shampoo yet?" With a sneer of her own, Kit pushed past them right into someone else.

"For Merlin's sake!" Kit huffed and stepped back, only to look up at Professor Slughorn.

"Good morning to you, Miss Ruskova. I just spoke to your cousin. She'd feel much better now, thankfully. She is very excited to be at my party tonight. I'll see you there as well?" Slughorn said in a way that left little choice as to whether or not she would in fact be there.

"Of course, Professor. I wouldn't dream of missing it."

"Remember, you must bring a date. Someone who isn't in the club already." Slughorn tapped the side of his nose for a reason Kit could not fathom. So she just smiled and nodded at him.

"Of course." He waddled past her, leaving her with Lucius and Snape.

"You have a date for the party?" Malfoy asked, his voice holding something Kit didn't like.

"I'm sure as hell not taking you." Kit snapped.

"Wouldn't dream of it," Lucius held his hands up and walked off, Snape in his wake. Lucius rarely lost his cool around someone, unlike Snape. The Great Hall was near empty, since it was still before noon, and she found Sirius sitting in their usual spot. Walking over, she smacked him upside the head.

"Bloody hell," he whined, rubbing the now sore spot.

"That was for what ever you tried last night," Kit sat and started to butter her toast like nothing was wrong.

"But I didn't try anything last night,"

"Well, then, it was just for good measure." Kit flashed him a dazzling smile and began eating before he could hit her in return. In fact, he raised his hand, threatening her with the milk jug, when he suddenly put it down.

"Here comes your boyfriend," he said, going back to his meal quietly. Eric came over and asked if he could talk to her alone. He gave Sirius a pointed look before moving Kit down to the end of the table where they could be alone.

"What's up?" Kit asked brightly, trying to hide whatever feelings were running through her. Eric didn't return her smile so quickly and she scooted to sit closer to him. "What's wrong?" she asked sincerely.

"Tell me honestly, do you have a thing for Potter? I am just a filler or something?" His voice held just enough hurt to make her heart clench. His brown eyes held her own, a raw emotion somewhere in their depths.

"Why do you ask?" She questioned, fearing the answer.

"Last night in the common room." He laughed without humour. "This morning in the common room. Because you looked pretty comfortable, and if I'm just being..." he struggled for a word for a moment, his hands clenching, "used, then I don't want to be."

"Oh, Eric, no. Of course not." She pushed his hair back from his brow and shook her head. "You're not filler, you're anything but." She put a hand on his cheek. How could she have let something like this happen?

"You know, if you'd prefer Potter, I understand. I wouldn't be happy about it, but-" Kit silenced him by kissing his lips mid sentence.

"I don't. I want you." He seemed to take her word for it, because he sighed and pulled her onto his lap.

"What are you going to do with me?" He asked, burrowing his head into the crook between her neck and shoulder.

"How about a date?" She asked. "I know we can't go on a real one until Hogmeade, but Slughorn's having this party..."

"I'd love to," he smiled down at Kit, his hair flopping into his eyes. James's hair did that sometimes. Kit started and shook her head to get rid of the odd thought.

"You'll have to get dressed up," Kit said.

"Wait, Katherine Ruskova in a dress? No way I'd miss that." Eric laughed at Kit's sudden frown. Of course, she didn't have anything to wear. She had a dress from a while ago, but it was all stretched now and there was a stain on the from where James had spilled his butterbeer all over it.

Kit stuck her tongue out at him and rolled her eyes. "A rare occurrence," A moment later, Eric stood, saying he had an essay to write and he wanted to get in done by tonight. Kit nodded, and gave him a quick peck goodbye before shuffling back over to Sirius.

"What was that about?" he asked as he stuffed another pancake in his mouth.

"Nothing. Eric and I are going to Slug's stupid party," Kit rolled her eyes and resumed her breakfast, not seeing the Cheshire cat grin Sirius had. Finally, after sitting around and talking to Sirius for what felt like hours, the others started filing in. James, Remus and Peter all sat by Kit and Sirius, James taking care to sit a little further from Kit than usual. Now Remus sat between them, and after a quick joke, the tense mood dissipated. Out of the corner of her eye, Kit saw a familiar girl walk by and jumped up to meet her.

"Oh! Remy! Hi," the Hufflepuff beater stopped to smile at Kit.

"Hey! Ready for Quidditch season?"

"You bet. Ready to hand the cup over to Gryffindor?"

"Not a chance," Remy laughed, her long black braids swinging as she did.

"Actually, I came to ask you a favour. I need to get into the Hufflepuff dorms to see my cousin. Think you could get me in?"

"Kit, of course." Remy nodded to the door and led Kit down to the basement. Kit did admire Hufflepuffs, they were kind to a fault in a way that some Gryffindors weren't. Thinking about it, Rose deserved to be in Hufflepuff; not because she wasn't strong or brave, but because she was loyal and tolerant and worked hard. Those last two were exactly why Kit wasn't in Hufflepuff with her.

Remy lead her to a still life portrait and whispered a password. It opened to reveal a circular tunnel that lead to the common room. Kit was astounded at what the common room looked like. It was very cozy for something that was underground, but there seemed to be a strong theme of circles. Kit laughed a bit at it quietly, making Remy smile.

"I know, a bit much, huh?" She said as she led her through another tunnel to the girl's dormitories.

"You should see the Gryffindor one. Red and gold everywhere," Remy pulled a face, but Kit knew it was in jest. She stopped in front of a circular door labeled sixth years. Kit knocked cautiously and waited for someone to open the door.

"Hello?" A girl's head popped out, her blond hair darker than Rose's.

"Hi, is Rose in there?" Kit asked. The girl nodded and moved out of the way. Remy waved goodbye as Kit slipped in.

"I'm Mary, by the way." Mary stuck her hand out and shook Kit's.

"Yeah, I haven't seen you much this year. Still come out for Quidditch?"

"Every game," Mary laughed. Rose came out from the bathroom and looked towards her closet, not noticing Kit until she was halfway there.

"Oh! Why are you here?" Was the first thing that came to mind, Rose instantly biting her lip. Kit waved her off with a smile.

"I need something for tonight,"

"You got invited to the party, too?" Rose asked as they walked over to the closet. Kit sat on the edge of her bed and nodded.

"I have one dress, Rosie. And it has a stain on it. Could I borrow one of yours? I'd owl mom if I thought it's get here on time, but I don't think that's going to happen." But Kit could tell Rose was already searching for something that would work.

"Size isn't an issue," she muttered, flicking through her dresses. Kit thought about asking why she had so many, bu decided against it. Maybe most girls had more dresses and Kit didn't know. Rose spun to cast a shrewd eye on Kit, telling her to stand up.

"With brown hair, colour won't be a huge problem," her muttering had turned Russian now, leaving Mary to smile and slip out. "Favourite colour?"

"Oh, I don't know. Red?"

Rose smiled at her, "How patriotic," Kit assumed she meant to her house and smiled back. She looked through her closet again and pulled three dresses out, laying them on the bed. Kit looked at them, noticing that only one of then was red. The first was red, the second a deep navy blue and the last black.

"Go on," Rose patted her and put the red dress in her hand. Kit went into the bathroom and stepped into the pool of red fabric. It was a long dress, the bust was a smooth red silk while the skirt was red lace atop of red silk. It dragged on the floor as Kit left the washroom, the extra fabric in the bust reminding of her how small her own bust was. Rose waved her wand and the excess fabric pulled away until it fit perfectly. But Rose wasn't satisfied, judging by her frown.

"No. Try the blue one," Kit went off again and, again, the dress wasn't right. It had made her look too short, something that Kit hadn't thought possible. With a sigh, she picked up the last dress, her hopes not high for the last piece. It would have been a lie to say she wasn't enjoying herself; as a matter of fact, she was having a lot of fun with Rose. She'd didn't get a chance to play dress up with other girls, something she hadn't thought she would have liked.

As she stepped into the final dress, Kit wondered if there were some girls who dressed up every day. Zipping up the back, Kit stepped out, feeling the fabric mould to fit her before she'd even gotten out of the bathroom. There was a silence and Kit peeked a glance at herself in the mirror.

"Nope!" Rose caught her looking and spun her away from the glass. "No peeking." She went back to her closet and dug around in the bottom of it for something. A moment later, she pulled a length of red ribbon out and tied it around Kit's waist. Rose stood back and smiled at her handiwork.

"Do I get to look now?" Kit whined impatiently. Rose shook her head with a smile.

"No peeking until tonight. I'll meet you at five to get ready, and I'll have the dress."

Kit slipped out of the dress with a glare at her cousin. "You are cruel." But she couldn't help thinking that three hours to get ready for something was a bit outrageous. Despite with she thought, Rose was firm about the time and sent Kit on her way. Well, what was she supposed to do for the rest of the day? It was barely two and she had three hours to burn. She _did_ have that Potions essay and a Defense test on Monday. Groaning, she thought about the pile of work waiting for her back in the Gryffindor common room.

* * *

**Two chapters in one day! Crazy, right? Well, I'm hoping to keep this pace up and pump out chapters like there's so tomorrow.**

**Thank you for reading!**

**Dahlia  
**


	8. Chapter 8

Kit had sat through getting her hair done, been squeezed into a dress, and had her face frozen to get make up put on. And she was beginning to enjoy the process, maybe even having fun. But there was no way in hell, she was going to wear those. Rose lifted the lid of a deep green box and showed Kit the shoes. They were heels, smooth and covered in black satin with a red ribbon laced up the back. Kit was currently with her back against the wall, shaking her head at the idea.

"No way. In your dreams Rosie!" Kit could see it now, she'd trip and break her ankle and be out of Quidditch _and _make a fool of herself. Besides, she'd heard every girl complaining about how much her feet hurt after a ball. How was that supposed to make Kit feel better?

Rose held one shoe out to Kit, who eyed it suspiciously. "No Kit, in his dreams." Kit paused to look at her cousin. How did she know what Eric liked, or did all guys like heels?

"I won't hurt myself?" she asked her cousin, sitting back down on the bed.

"Kit, I've seen you stand on your broom and not fall. Two inch heels are hardly going to be a problem."

"What if my feet hurt?"

"We can put a charm on your feet. Happy?" Rose sighed, just wanting to put the shoes on Kit so she could see how amazing she looked. Kit took her time reaching for the shoe, but she finally held it and conceded a small smile.

"I suppose I could do it. For one night." Rose nearly screamed with excitement, making Kit jump. Setting the shoes down, she let Kit slid her feet into the soft shoes. She was surprised to find that they didn't feel that much different than her regular shoes. They didn't hurt nearly as much as she'd thought they would. She stood and smiled when she remained upright. She took a cautious step forward, stepping awkwardly as she got used to the shoe.

"Walk with your heel first," Rose said as she dug around for something. "As use your hips, you'll have better balance." She didn't see Kit's look of confusion or disbelief, but instead straightened to see her cousin walking around the room, her hips swinging slightly to give her better control. Impressed, Rose flashed Kit a smile. With a look at Mary, the two ran over and pushed Kit in front of the mirror. She stumbled a little, but when she straightened, she gasped.

Her hair flew out in every direction, but didn't look like an absolute mess. In fact, it looked like a brown halo. Kit's gaze fell onto her face, and she couldn't tell she was wearing make up, except for the fact her eyelashes brushed her cheeks when she blinked. The dress was what she really wanted to see, but she kept her gaze slow, so she could see everything. The top of the strapless dress had little feathery wisps of lace that decorated her collarbone. The black lace then fell over her chest and was pulled back into her waist by a wide red ribbon, the colour of Gryffindor. Smiling, Kit played with the hem of the skirt, watching as it floated away from her legs, then sunk back again. Her leg were on display, and they looked long, which was odd. But Kit admitted that the heels looked really good. They made her calf muscles flex ever so slightly and made her stand taller. Kit turned to look at Rose and Mary and giggled. They both squealed with equal excitement and hug the small brunette.

"Thank you guys. Even if I was awful to put up with," Rose brushed her comment off and Mary scoffed. They spent a few moments tugging things into the right position and moving hair so it sat straight. Kit's brows drew together and she looked at the clock on the bedside table. Six, already?

"Do you guys have to get ready?" Those simple words sent the to girls in a flurry of action. Rose was pulling on her own dress, Mary was getting the make up and hair things ready. Kit gasped again when Rose stood in her dress. Without make up, shoes or her hair done, it looked stunning. It was full length, something accentuated her height, and was made up of hundreds of large, round sequins. There was a pattern embroidered across the dress, of pink flowers on green vines. Just as Rose shook it out, Mary began to pull on her own. It was beautiful as well. Midnight blue, it went right down to the floor and pooled lightly there. The straps had little crystals in them, reminding Kit of the night sky.

Rose and Mary shared the mirror, something easier said than done when hot irons were being used. But they both made it through unharmed. Rose's hair was finished first and it shined like burnished gold. It was curled only slightly at the ends and fell free to the middle of her back. Mary's hair was free of it's confines and sat straight to her shoulders in glossy blonde sheets. Kit smiled at both of them in the mirror and asked what she could do.

"Sit and look pretty," Rose told her while applying lipstick and finishing up. Rose turned to face her cousin and asked how she looked. She'd done her make up to match the dress, soft pink lips and a light green eyeliner that made her eyes pop. With the way her hair look and the long dress, Kit thought she looked amazing. Then she saw Rosie's shoes.

"You're wearing those?" Kit asked upon seeing the heels that were easily double the height of her own. "You must be mad," Kit rolled her eyes then looked at Mary, who was just putting on her shoes. Maybe it was because she wasn't used to seeing people all dressed up, but Kit thought everyone looked amazing. Dazzlingly beautiful. But with her short hair and minimum make up, Kit felt a shot of insecurity. Rose looked like a goddess and Mary, with her sleek blonde hair, looked like royalty, but where did Kit fit in?

As if sensing the time, each girl got one last look in the mirror before walking out to meet their respective dates.

"Who are you going with, Mary?" Kit asked curiously as she tried to focus on not falling as they approached the steps.

"Amos," Mary said, a little blush colouring her cheeks.

"Really? I would have thought that Rose would go with him," Kit searched her mind for who Rose could have gone with. Mary was already down the stairs and she could heal the familiar rumble of Diggory's voice. How had he gotten into the common room? Before she could ask Rose who her date was, Rose was down the stairs. She heard Rose laugh and give someone her compliments. Then another deep voice grumbled with a chuckle. Then there was silence and Kit took that as her cue. Saying a little prayer that she didn't tumble down the stairs, she took hold of the banister and slowly made her descent.

A stunned silence met her at the bottom of the stairs. Mary and Rose were already grinning like idiots at their handiwork. Amos was smiling at her from behind Mary and Kit smiled back shyly. Her gaze slid over to Rose and her date. Her brown eyes widened as none other than Sirius Black smirked back at her. Okay, she could handle this. They would be in the same room all night, she she could keep an eye on him. Besides, she'd given Rose a bit of freedom. So, surprisingly, instead of glaring or yelling, Kit looked him over with an eyebrow raised.

"You look good, Pads." She admitted finally, thankful that there weren't many people to hear her confession.

"As do you. Though I never thought I'd see the day Kit was in a dress _and_ heels." He joked, but Kit had already turned away to see the final person at the bottom of the stairs. Eric was in the nicest pair of dress robes she'd seen at Hogwarts. All clean lines and sharp creases, the black robes were accented by a vest the colour of smoke. His hair was brushed off his face and if his robes weren't enough, the look of adoration made Kit's knees weak.

"You look..." He seemed to struggle for words, making Kit blush.

"Thanks." She stepped forward to take his arm and secretly was glad that she had something to hold onto.

"You might have to carry me back to the dorms, though." In explanation, Kit pointed her leg out, the black heel catching his attention. Soon, the leg attached to the shoe held his gaze, his eyes travelling up until they came to rest on her face. Kit felt her insides squirm happily; no one had looked at her like that. She couldn't fight the smile that sprang to her lips, but Eric didn't mind. He smiled along with her as they entered Slughorn's office.

People had already arrived and were milling about. Kit recognized a few of the faces, surprised to see as many Quidditch players as she did. Her invitation had said that there was going to be a period of time to mill about as the guests arrived, then they would all sit down for a dessert. Kit couldn't help but have laughed at the idea. Of course, Slughorn would be eating at nine o'clock. No one had announced their arrival, but the other guests stopped to look at the trio of girls and their respective dates. Guys stared at Rose while the females stared at Sirius, as was to be expected. Amos and Mary were getting just as much attention. What Kit hadn't been expect was the number of glances her way.

"What's going on?" She asked Eric after finally making to the refreshments. Eric laughed at her question and put an arm around her.

"People staring? That's what tends to happen when a beautiful woman enters the room." Kit rose her eyebrows at him, but couldn't quite wrap her head around the thought. She'd never thought of herself as ugly, and she liked to think she was a step above plain, but after spending such a long time just being friends with a bunch of guys, she'd lost her ability to sense when people were looking and her and when people were really looking at her. She'd watched other girls get those looks, and send their own smiles back, but was rather oblivious to them herself.

Shaking off the thought, Kit looked around and saw a familiar rotund stomach making its way to the pair.

"Miss Ruskova! I must say you look lovely tonight," Professor Slughorn was dress his best; light silver robes with a dark green cummerbund and tie. He looked very Slytherin, but Kit admitted that his robes fit well. After over a month of straining buttons and silk pulled to tightly across his gut, it was a pleasant change.

"And Mr Dennings, dashing as well," Eric inclined his head and the two began talking about a potion Eric was researching. Eric was quite good at Potions, another reason he was invited besides the fact his parents swam in money. Pointing her hand to say she'd be walking around, she left Eric with a quick peck, which was awkward considering Professor Slughorn was still standing before them. She heard Eric go into deep discussion with Slughorn before she walked off. A large portion of the space had been devoted to a 'dance floor'. The only problem was that no one was dancing and very old classical music was playing. Instead, the space offered a place for students to chat and mingle. Kit stood back and watched the people talk, every so often waving to a friend. She was in the middle of a conversation with a boy who's father was on the national Quidditch team. Kit was enthralled with what he, Denis, was saying.

"Well, he spends most of his time training, you see. At the field just outside London with the rest of the time. He's not a home much 'cause of that." Denis looked sad for a moment, but perked up at a sudden thought.

"But come World Cup season, we get some of the best seats in the arena." Kit's jaw dropped when he said that the families of the players got to share a nice room with couches and Butterbeer.

"You're kidding? Isn't that a bit dangerous if you all share one room?"

Denis nodded. "Some times tempers get the better of some of us, but most of the time it's fine. We're all there to just enjoy the game, right?"

"Right," Kit took a sip of her drink and looked over the boy's shoulder to see Rose emerge from a curtained alcove with Sirius on her heels. She glared at her cousin openly. What had she told Rose about Sirius? She was not impressed or pleased. Rose saw her glare and gulped at it. Kit felt a bit of pride in eliciting that reaction and had hoped to give Rose a bit of a talking to when Slughorn appeared in front of Rose. Kit smirked, that was punishment enough.

"Hey, finally got away from him." Eric laughed and ducked down to kiss her.

"Seems like he found a new target," Kit pointed at Rose, who looked less than pleased by the whole situation.

"Poor girl," he sighed and groaned when Slughorn took a picture. "I hate those pictures," Eric grumbled, and Kit had to agree with him. The Professor used them as bragging tools, so he could pull the pictures up one day and say, "Yes, I taught that student. Very bright, loved me as a teacher." As if; the only students then particularly liked Slughorn were Slytherin's and perhaps a few Ravenclaws.

"I heard he's got a seating arrangement for dessert." Eric whispered into her ear. Kit tried not to shiver as his breath danced against her neck. She smiled up at him when his chest shook with laughter.

"What?" Kit asked, but Eric's lips were upon hers before she got an answer. There was a strange sound from behind Eric and then the familiar sound of someone trying to calm another person. Kit pulled back and looked over Eric's should at two mops of black hair talking to one another. As she looked around, Kit was surprised not see as many eyes watching James and Sirius.

"James, wait for a minute," But even as Sirius went to get James, Slughorn called everyone to the table. There were upwards of twenty people at the party, but they all sat around one table. Old-fashioned as he was, Slughorn had people sitting boy, girl. So Kit thankfully was sitting beside Eric, with Denis from before on her other side. Rose was sitting across from Eric, with Sirius sitting in front of Kit. Beside Rose was James, who was glaring somewhere just above Kit's head.

"Now, William, you say your parents have made headway with a new Potion?" Slughorn began as the food was served. A large, silver goblet was placed in front of Kit, a dense chocolate cake in the bottom with mousse on top. Lifting her spoon, Kit took a less than ladylike bite. Okay, she might not have liked Slughorn, but he had great taste when it came to food. With a gut like that, Kit supposed he had to.

"Katherine, how are your parents?" Kit looked up to see the table looking at her. Even James made eye contact with her. When she met his eyes, she shivered. Had she done something wrong?

"Great. My father has been promoted to head healer at St. Mungo's." There was a small, appreciative applause from the group. "Mum's been offered a few jobs, but she likes being an Auror."

"And what about you? How are you finding this year?" Slughorn asked, a bit of chocolate hanging to his moustache. He should really just shave the thing off, the amount it bothered Kit.

"Yes, Kit, how are you finding it?" She was surprised to hear James ask that question. Eric's hand found hers beneath the table and gave it a squeeze.

"Great, actually. What about you, James?" Apparently, the rest of the table took this as their cure to start their own conversations.

"There are a few things I'd be happier about," He glared at Eric openly.

"Like what?" Kit asked sweetly, but her hand held Eric's in a vice grip.

"Oh, I don't know. I'm finding people have changed since the last time I saw them."

"James, grow up." Kit snapped. Taken aback, James' eyes flew wide open, then narrowed at her.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me, grow up. You're acting like a child." Kit's voice was steadily getting louder, but she didn't care.

"How am_ I_ acting like a child?" James asked incredulously.

"I don't know what the hell I did to you, but stop pouting about whatever it is. Or better yet, stop glaring at me and whoever I'm with. Leaving things be instead of destroying them would be nice too." James glowered at her, but she didn't back down, now aware that all eyes were on her.

"I don't give two shits about what you do, just be mature enough to say something about it," then it dawned on her. Part of her was ashamed, another was furious, and perhaps a tiny part of her was flattered. But she couldn't look past the fact he'd dragged Eric through.

"You're angry because of Eric?" Kit asked slowly.

"No, that's not it," James tried to backpedal, but Kit was on a role.

"Don't get pissed off because someone else got there first, James. Maybe if you said something instead of pretending that everything was fine, you wouldn't be acting like a moody like child." Kit didn't realize Rose had been holding his hand until she heard a sickening crack. When she finally tore her eyes from a fuming James, she saw that Sirius had risen and every face was turned to their argument. Now Sirius bent in front of Rose to inspect her hands and James was blubbering apologizes to her.

Kit nearly lost it then. He'd hurt her cousin, and now that cousin was willingly finding solace in Sirius's arms. With nothing else to do, she did exactly what she'd told James not to do, and caused some damage. She picked up her dessert plate and chucked it at James' head then said a quick muttered goodbye to Eric. She stormed out of the room, her face contorted with rage. Too upset to deal with walking in the damned high heels, Kit kicked them off in the middle of the corridor before running up to the common room.

Remus and Peter were sitting, working on research together when stormed into the room. She ran up to the dorm before they could say anything. Once inside, and not caring who was in there with her, she threw off the dress and pulled on the first thing she could find. Then, just as she was about to leave, she saw her notebook poking out of her bag. Another flare of anger surged through as she remembered all the things James had been writing about her boyfriend for the past month. Grabbing it, she left the room, leaving a wake of charged air behind her.

"Kit, listen," James said as she rounded a corner, and instead of turning and leaving like he'd anticipated, she marched up to him and pushed the book into his chest.

"You dumb, stupid prat!" She punctuated each word with another whack of the book against his chest. "If you have something to say about Eric, say it!"

"He doesn't deserve you!"

"Oh, because you know exactly who I deserve? Let me tell you something; it isn't you. Because I deserve so much better than an immature, nosy, pig-headed, violent bastard." Kit's words rung in the air as she left James alone in the corridor. Not caring about curfew or detention, she left the warmth of the castle and walked out to the frosted grounds.

When had James ever liked her? What hadn't he done something sooner instead of ruining their friendship? She couldn't believe he was so worked up about it and never said anything. Or, at least, never said anything to her or Eric. No, he decided to go behind her back and complain to everyone else. Kit hissed as she realized everyone had been keeping it from her. Rose, Remus, Sirius and Peter had probably all known and hadn't said one word. What, had they been hoping she and Eric would break up so James could take his place? Were they planning to break them up for James' benefit? Did they even_ care _that she was dating someone she really liked? They'd all made decisions about her life without so much as asking her if she wanted anything changed.

Kit's feet had been moving of their own accord while her mind spun in furious circles. By the time she noticed where she was going, she was already at the Black Lake, the pebble shore sharp beneath her bare feet. She tumbled to the ground as if all the energy had left her body, but her mind was still to riled up that she couldn't imagine forgiving one of them for what they'd all done. When she wrapped her arms around her legs, she realized she should have paid a little more attention to what she'd grabbed. At least she had long pants on, but as a top she'd thrown on an old t-shirt. The chill easily slipped through the thin cotton and soon she was freezing, but nothing could have convinced her to go back to the castle, let alone the Gryffindor common room. Alone, with no one to listen, her thoughts became darker and darker. They spiraled around in her mind, and each time she thought about the betrayal, the selfishness of James, her anger grew. So when she heard someone move to sit beside her, she was less than welcoming.

"Bugger off. Not in the mood," For good measure, she stuck her middle finger up without taking her eyes off of the still water. There was a chuckle then the sound of clothing rustling as the person sat down. The chuckle was smooth like honey, but as slick as oil and Kit knew who she was sitting beside.

"I mean it, Malfoy. I'm not in the mood."

"I know you're not." He laughed again at her look of surprise. "Word travels fast around here."

"Then why are you here? Make my life worse? Because I dare you to try. Really, I could use a release right now." Her wand was tucked into the waist of her sweatpants. And she was itching to let loose some of her pent up energy.

"Come, now. Do you really think fighting is wise right now?" His words slipped over like silk and despite her anger, she could understand how so many people fell for his charms.

"Don't you just want to rest?" Lucius asked and got a long, hard look from Kit.

"What do you really want?" She asked cautiously.

"Must I need something to talk to you?" He seemed offended at the idea, and if it wasn't for his smirk, Kit would have believed him.

"Yes," she said simply.

"I'm just offering you the company and comfort none of your friends are providing," He pointed out with a lazy wave of his hand. Kit had to admit that that stung. If Rose didn't come right away, she could understand; she was hurt. But she'd come eventually, right? And she didn't want to talk to James, but if he'd come out to find her, it would at least show he cared. Not to mention Remus and Peter hadn't done a damn thing. Kit threw a rock into the water with a shout. She'd been the one betrayed here, and no cared except for Malfoy? She shivered as she considered that the one person who was comforting her was someone she was supposed to hate. Much to her surprise she found that a cloak was draped across her shoulders. She pulled the warm, rich fabric closer to her and gave her company a small smile.

"Thanks, Malfoy," she said, trying to ignore how odd it felt to be talking to him without curses being tossed around. But the more she thought about it, the more she realized she rarely spoke to him alone. Maybe he was different. She was shattered from the fight, and on any other day, she would have outright refused to speak to him or acknowledge that there may be another side to his usual sneer.

"Must we use the last names, Ruskova?" He sounded weary, as if he thought they were beyond the point of calling each other by their surnames.

"I didn't know you knew my first name," Kit observed as she attempted to ignore how comfortable his cloak was and how great it smelt. Kit shook her head to hear Lucius call her Katherine.

"Well, Lucius, where does that leave us now?"

"Katherine, don't change the subject. Do you want to talk about what happened?"

Kit rose an eyebrow suspicious and considered. "I thought every man was hopeless when it came of women problems. Isn't our voice complaining like nails on a chalkboard?"

Lucius laughed and allowed a nod. "Some have no idea what to do. I like to think that I have some idea. Now, tell me what happened," And with those words, Kit found herself opening up to the last person she thought she would have. She told him everything, from how James had been acting weird, to why she was dating Eric and even how she felt about everything.

"I can't think of a better word than betrayed. They all went behind my back and assumed they knew what was best," Kit finished with a sigh, not realizing until now the Lucius's hand was making comforting circles on her back. She would have leapt out of it (it _was_ Malfoy) except it felt really nice.

"I don't think your friends think very highly of you. Do they not trust you to make your own choices?"

"Apparently not," Kit groaned, the feeling of betrayal getting worse the longer she sat out.

"And this Eric, do you feel for him?" Kit squirmed at having to confess that to Lucius. But his hand slid down to take her hand in his own.

"Yes," she admitted.

"What about Potter?"

"Not after this episode. He's everything I told him he was; pig-headed, immature and violent."

"I want to you to know I'm not saying this just because I don't like Potter, but I don't think he can truly care for you if he didn't come to see you. Or even try to apologize." The words hung in the air and they hurt Kit more than she wanted to admit. Thankfully, she didn't cry, but she turned to lean her head on Lucius's shoulder.

"I have to admit, you're the last person I thought I'd be sitting with, alone at midnight."

"I must admit the same, Katherine." Her full name sounded very elegant coming from his lips. With a voice like silk, it was hard for things not to sound nice. She sighed and played with the edge of his cloak.

"What are you doing here, anyways? I thought you would have been at Slug's club party," He chuckled at Kit's nickname for his Head of House, but shrugged.

"There are only so many times that man can suck up to your family before it gets tedious."

"Tell me about it," Kit whined. She didn't understand why he spoke the way he did. Eloquently, fluidly and a way that seemed just a bit dated. Rose sometimes spoke like that simply because she was learning how to speak English properly. But everyone native to the country butchered the language as her uncle liked to say. She found the way Lucius spoke calming.

"Katherine, it's past midnight. You should go back," Lucius stood and offered her a hand up. She took it and rose to walk alongside him. They didn't speak as they entered the building save for when he froze Mrs Norris as she turned a corner.

"You'll get a head start," he said, and pointed up the staircase to the Gryffindor Tower.

"Thanks, you know, for everything." Lucius smiled at her and turned the corner down to the dungeons, unfreezing the cat as he passed her.

Kit walked up to the common room wearily, his cloak still over she shoulders. Thankfully, it didn't have a Slytherin crest on it, or there would have been a lot of questions. Not that Kit even planned on speaking to any of the guys. She was going to walk into the common room and walk straight into her dorm.

The Pink lady was not pleased to be woken at such an hour, but Kit told her the password and ignored the little huff she gave. When she walked in, she was met with silence. Casting a glare around the room, Kit began to walk up the stairs.

"Don't let me stop you," she added bitterly, knowing one of the would hear.

"Stop us from what?" Sirius asked, already out of his chair.

"Talking about me. I don't mind really. Do whatever the hell you feel like." Lucius's words rang in her head as she walked up the stairs. "Not like I matter anymore," she added quietly. She could afford to sulk and mope after an evening of yelling.

"Kit," Rose said, but Kit slammed the door of her dorm before she could say anything else. Cold, certainly. Uncalled for, not in the least. Kit laid the cloak across the foot of her bed and climbed between the sheets without changing.

Her conversation with Lucius replayed in her head, each time making her feel worse and worse. The anger drained from her as she fell asleep, but it wouldn't stay away for long. Instead she fell asleep feeling very sorry for herself.

* * *

**Hi there! I'm going on a bit of a posting rampage today and I'm hoping to get all the finished chapters up. So that's 8 through 11, with 12 almost done. It's a lot, but I'm excited to get it all up and I'm hoping to get upward of 30 00 words tonight. **

**You know the drill, who owns what and such. I'd love to hear from you all and thank you so much for reading!**

**Also, please check out From Russia With Love by .. It is the sister story to this and is so much fun to read.  
**


	9. Chapter 9

It couldn't be said that Kit was overjoyed about anything the next day, her previous sour mood having clung to her that night. It dug its nails in and latched on firmly, smirking as if to say it wasn't leaving for a very long time. Kit wasn't happy about how she'd tossed the whole night, nor was she happy that Evans made a racket when she finally decided to amble in at three in the morning. But Kit was moderately pleased to realize it was a Sunday and therefore she had little to do. She didn't think she could stand the idea of having class with her so-called friends for a whole day.

What had they been thinking? Kit groaned and pressed her face deeper into the soft cushions, willing them to smother her whole, or at least smother the endless chatter in her head. She knew that they'd all betrayed her, but that didn't mean she wanted to think about it endlessly. It hurt a little bit more each time she did. She didn't want to see Eric yet, since she didn't know how he'd handled the previous night's events, but she didn't want to stay in bed all day. She turned in the sheets and saw Lucius's cloak hanging over the foot board. Malfoy was pretty neutral territory, she decided as she rose from the pillowy mattress. She took a shower, hoping maybe the soothing hot water would wash away some of the thought in her head. And as steam curled under the door and fogged up the mirrors, she did begin to feel better. Not that she'd forgiven any of them, she just didn't have a pounding headache anymore. She turned off the water and stood in the foggy bathroom for a long moment.

Why would they even think that they knew best? Weren't they forgetting about the little brunette who's life they'd decided to control? Worst yet, why did they think she needed to change what she was or who she was with? Eric was a great guy! And apparently none had cared enough about how they'd treated her to come and find her when she didn't go back to the dorm after leaving the party. What great friends, Kit mused darkly as she changed. It was chilly out, so she pulled a Falmouth Falcon's sweater and tugged on a pair of jeans to keep out the chill. Scooping up the cloak, Kit left the dorms with her head high, but didn't meet an eye. She looked through Remus as he walked in and sped past Sirius too. She didn't know where James and she couldn't have cared less as she stepped into the main hall and began her descent into the dungeon. It didn't occur to her that she didn't know how to get into the Slytherin common room. Kit slowed and thought about the general area, knowing it was concealed into the wall. She knew which corridor it was in, but that was the extent of her knowledge. She folded her legs under her and waited in the middle of the hall, drumming her fingers to keep busy. She thought about what the Syltherin's would upon seeing her and hearing her request. None of them were too fond of Kit, but there was some sort of tension she didn't understand when she was around them. Like they were all waiting for Kit to do something. She didn't bother giving it much thought; probably Slytherin's just being strange.

"Katherine?" A voice asked, and Kit turned to see Lucius looking down at her. Snape was flanking him on his right said, Narcissa on his left. If there was one Slytherin she hated more than Snape, it was Narcissa. She was just cold to the bone. Kit wouldn't have been surprised if her heart didn't have a beat.

"I thought you'd want this back," she Rose and held out the cloak. Malfoy took it, his fingers just brushing her's in the motion.

"Yes, well," Kit shrugged awkwardly, not understanding the significance of the graze. "I'll be going," Narcissa gave a look that said she should be on her way and Snape's hand was already twitching to go to his wand. Boy, he was eager today.

"How are things?" Malfoy asked before she had a chance to move. Snape froze and looked at him, dumbstruck.

Kit made a noncommittal sound, not wanting to say too much in front of Narcissa or Snape. "Alright. No one said anything," she was surprised to hear a growl come from her own lips. Malfoy's lip twitched and he bowed his head.

"I knew they weren't good enough," he said solemnly. He turned and whisked his back up away, but not before they could both glare at Kit as they passed her. Lucius extended his arm and offered to walk her to the Great Hall. Kit hesitated, scuffing her runner against the stones.

"I'd better not. You know how people talk," and he did. But that didn't seem like enough of an argument.

"What are you afraid of, Katherine? That your friends will see?"

Kit scoffed, "If you could still call them friends,"

"Then why not spend your time around a higher calibre of wizard. One who won't try to run your life," he smiled at her, his blonde hair bright despite the lack of windows. Taking a breath, Kit nodded and took his arm.

"How were you after I left?"

"Fine. Tired; exhausted, actually. More than a little fed up," Kit rolled her eyes. It was too easy to bring all that stuff up again. There didn't seem much point in still talking about it. They had hurt Kit and now she needed time to heal and see if she could ever truly trust them again.

"I am sorry this happened to you," his voice was earnest, which made her stop at the doors.

"Really?" she asked. "I thought you would have been soaking it up. Isn't this what you try to do everyday to us?"

"Katherine, you mistake me for my friends. Just as yours have proven, not everyone within a group has the same opinion." Like all her friends choosing James while she picked Eric.

"Wow," she was going to have to wrap her head around the idea of a nice Slytherin. But she refused his offer to eat breakfast with him and instead went off to the Gryffindor table and sat down beside Eric.

"Hi," she said quietly. Eric nodded in greeting, still finding his porridge more fascinating.

"So it's true then?" he asked suddenly.

"What's true?"

"Potter's into you,"

"Well, I don't know." Kit pushed aside any doubts she had and turned to face Eric head on. "I'm not here to talk about him. I'm sorry I left the party without saying a proper goodbye."

"You seemed pretty upset," he stated.

"Yeah. Turns out my friends thought they knew better than I did." Kit gave him an apologetic smile, one he returned slowly.

"Do I have competition now?"

"With Potter? Hell, no," she was relieved to see that he relaxed. Taking her cue from him, she forced herself to exhale and enjoy the moment.

"Any plans for today?" Eric asked after a moment of companionable silence. Kit knew the answer before he'd finished asking the question.

"None," she smiled at him, her hands finding his. She wouldn't mind spending the day with Eric; she'd love it in fact. He didn't judge her or try to make decisions for her. She settled against him a bit more comfortably and felt his arms hold her a bit tighter.

"I don't know if I ever got a chance to tell you how amazing you looked last night,"

Kit smiled, flattered by his compliment. "Most of it was Rose's doing. I'm hopeless with most of that stuff." Kit did know how to put on make up, but she didn't have the skill Rose had. It made Kit wonder where her cousin had learned it at all. Durmstrang struck her as a rather masculine school.

"Why don't we find somewhere else to stay?" Kit asked and untangled herself from his grasp. A cruel thought ran through her mind as to where they should go. The Gryffindor common room was a perfectly justifiable place to be. What did it matter if James or anyone else saw, she wasn't dating James. She was dating Eric, and she wanted to sit in the common room. As they walked out, Kit couldn't keep from glancing at the Slytherin table. Malfoy caught her eye and smirked as she passed.

"Do you think the common room is a good idea?" Eric asked as they approached the Fat Lady.

"Why not? We deserve to be there, just like anybody else." Kit walked through the portrait, an uncertain Eric on her heels.

"Well, I know we are, but don't you think everyone will be a bit shaken after last night?" Eric's hands went instinctively to her waist she they entered. He tightened his grip when he saw her friends sitting by the fire.

"C'mon, let's go to my dorm." Eric whispered, if only to get her away from another fight. As it was, he could feel Sirius' eyes burning into his chest. He guided her to the seventh year dorm and pushed open the door, pointing to his bed. All the guys he shared a dorm with were out, thankfully. He watched Kit make herself comfortable on the red sheets and slowly made his way over.

"What's bothering you?" He asked once they were sitting side-by-side. Kit sighed and waved a hand.

"It's nothing," she said and fell back onto the pillows.

"Kit, you hardly fight like this with your friends. If you're unhappy, I want to know," He joined her, and took her hand, giving it a squeeze.

Kit smiled at him fleetingly and considered waving his question off again. He was kind, but she didn't want to whine. But, wasn't the fact that no one had listened to her in the first place what bothered her? Didn't she want someone to listen?

"You can tell me," Eric said softly. She was astounded at how kind Eric was, how understanding.

"They've been complaining about us dating. Them seem to think James is a better match." Kit gave a little huff and propped herself up on her elbows. "But what bothers me is that they don't even know you, they didn't even think to ask if I was happy with you. And not one of them came to apologize. Not to mention James broke Rose's fingers and ruined a whole party."

"Are you happy with me?" Eric asked.

"Oh, yes. Merlin yes," Kit gasped and held his cheeks to know that she meant it. "I would rather eat dirt than be with Potter And you, you're just perfect. You're kind and sweet. You play Quidditch and you treat me like a queen." She pressed her lips against his. "I couldn't imagine someone better." Eric smiled at her, his eyes warm and gentle. His hair was falling into his eyes again, in that adorable way. But Eric wasn't cute, he was handsome now. Thin, but lean with hair you just wanted to run your fingers through. Unable to resist, Kit did just that. Eric smiled at her and put a hand on her waist. She shivered in response, her own hand moving of its own accord. She would have figured out where that hand would have gone had it not been for the door flying open.

Assuming it was one of Eric's friends, Kit didn't pull away. Eric's grip on her wasn't relenting either. Neither of them looked away from the other and their thoughts were identical. Go away, was the unanimous thought, though it went unsaid. Kit's mind was off of the fight, or James or anyone else except for Eric, and at that moment, she didn't want it any other way.

But when she heard the very distinct sound of a female gasp, Kit jumped away, glancing at the frowning Eric before registering who was at the door.

"Rose?" Kit asked, somewhere between concern and annoyance. Okay, so the annoyance was winning out and Kit lifted herself enough to cross her arms.

"What?" She asked rather rudely, but she'd just been rudely interrupted. Eric's hands dragged across her skin as she sat up on the edge of the bed. Curiosity was beginning to stir within her, along with something else that had everything to do with the gossamer touch of Eric's fingers along her spine. When Rose finally caught her breath, she said something Kit hadn't been prepared for.

"James is missing," Rose said without preamble. Kit's eyes snapped up to her cousin, narrowing as they did so.

"Rose, it's Hogwarts. You can't go very far. He's fine." Kit knew Rose was scared for her new friend, but she was overreacting. He was probably sulking in a bathroom or something. Kit shrugged and nestled herself closer to Eric, who had sat up after realizing that Rose wasn't just going to leave.

"Katherine, the Headmaster is worried." That got a bit more of a reaction from Kit. Her eyes darkened as she told Rose to leave. Rose gave her cousin a look that clearly said Kit was being childish because she wasn't doing anything. But she shut the door behind her.

"Potter is a bit daft sometimes," Eric remarked, his hands finding her waist once again. Pushing the issue to the back of her mind, Kit turned and tried to resume what they'd been doing before the interruption. Eric was trying just as hard as she was it seemed. His lips found hers again and his hands began to explore her body.

James was missing. If Dumbledore was worried, it must be more than James locking himself in a broom closet. But Kit didn't care; he'd turn up once there was a big enough party looking for him so he could get the attention. That was who James was, although he'd never been this dramatic before. Maybe this was worse than she thought.

Kit tried to return Eric's embraces with the same vigour and passion, but she couldn't fight the worry anymore. She may have been angry at James (understatement), but he'd been her friend much longer than he'd been her enemy. And she was still angry at him, even more so because of this stunt he was pulling, but she couldn't stay there with Eric.

"Eric, stop." Kit began to pull herself away from Eric, but he held her fast. "Eric, I have to go find James."

"To hell with Potter. You're here with me now," he said, as if that answered everything.

"Yes, but I don't want to be if someone is in trouble." Kit began to fight harder against Eric's arms. Any other time she would have marvelled at his strength, but now it was just a nuisance. "Eric, let me go." She managed to get her hands from beneath his back and used them to distance herself from him.

"So, you're leaving me for Potter?" He spat, his fingers latching onto her forearms.

"I'm leaving you for a friend!" Kit used all her might and pulled away from him, storming out of the room. The door slammed behind her and she was down in the common room a moment later. Remus, Sirius, Peter and Rose all regarded her with emotions ranging from wary to disgust.

"Can we talk about our problems after we find James?" Kit snapped and bent over the map they produced. It was the infamous Marauders' Map, the one they'd just finished. Of course, Kit had worked on it with the rest of the boys, since she was good at Charms. But she didn't get a nice name on the front because she wasn't technically a Marauder. And she didn't have spiffy nickname. But they made sure she was just as connected to the map as they were. In the writing that made up the walls and lined the corridors of the map, Kit's name appeared regularly. It was sweet of them, not to mention when she appeared on the map, it was labeled as "The Goddess." That had been a joke that the boys had taken a bit too seriously. But there was no time to admire their handiwork now and they all leaned over to large piece of parchment.

They were shown on the map as a huddle in the common room, Eric and a few others in the dorms. A few people walked along the halls, though most were in the library or the Great hall.

"Start looking through the grounds, that way we don't risk our lives searching useless for him out there." Kit said, pointing to the parts outside the castle.

"Not to mention it's turned chilly," Peter said as he looked along the West side of the map. Remus looked at the North, Sirius the South and Rose and Kit picking through the East. There was hardly anyone outside, save for Hagrid, so they ruled out the grounds quickly.

"He couldn't have left the school." Remus said as he began to search the dungeons. Remus took the lead, dividing the school into sections and assigning each one to a certain part. Kit was to take the seventh and sixth floor. Rose and Sirius were to take the fifth and fourth floor, Peter the third and second, and Remus on the ground floor and the dungeons. If they found him, they were to go back to the common room and send word to the others using enchanted parchment planes. If they didn't find him by dinner, they were to all meet in the common room then go to Dumbledore.

Kit left with the rest of them and began her search. The seventh floor wasn't too busy save for the ten couples she'd walked in on, but besides the odd sound from an empty classroom, the floor was empty. James had done a rather good job of making himself scarce, she thought with a hint of bitterness. Although she doubted she'd go back to Eric when the search was over. He'd put himself above someone who'd been her friend for years. Then again, she had been fuming at him before, so maybe Eric wasn't fully to blame.

Kit shook her head and came to a familiar part of the seventh floor. The tapestry of Barnabas teaching troll to dance was at her back as she surveyed the stretch of wall before her. Why hadn't she thought of it earlier? The one place that didn't show up on the Marauders' Map and the one place it would be near impossible to find him. James was smart, Kit had to admit. She began walking past the length of wall directly opposite the tapestry thinking over and over again,_ I want to find James Potter_. When the door appeared, Kit paused before opening. Did she want to be the first one to find him? Did she even want to deal with the brunt force of pure anger that was bound to be directed at her? But as she recalled the number of times he was there for her, to comfort her and bring her down from a raging fury, she knew she had to be there for him. She turned the handle and slowly took in the scene before her.

Hundreds of pillows lay torn at her feet, feathers lining the entire floor. There were broken chairs, desks that had holes punched through them and a closet that was missing a door. Kit steep through the wreckage carefully until she could see him. His was pressed up against the back of a couch that was missing both its cushions. His eyes were red from crying and his knuckles were bleeding. If possible, he looked more disheveled than normal.

"You look like hell, James," Kit said quietly, trying to ease the obvious tension. He just glared up at her through his glasses. She met his gaze with a glare of her own, any thought of being there for him abandoned.

"Listen, don't get bent out of shape because someone had more guts than you did." Kit snapped when it became obvious that just talking was out of the question.

"Why Dennings?" James asked.

"Oh, so you'd act differently if it was Remus I was with? Or Sirius?" James looked up at her with such a furious look that Kit actually recoiled. There was a question obviously noticeable in his face. "No, I don't have a thing for Remus or Sirius! Merlin, it's like you think you have a right to me or something."

"I'm looking out for you,"

"Yes, because breaking my cousin's hand is 'looking out for me.' "

"I said I was sorry about that." But Kit was still talking over him.

"And glaring daggers at my boyfriend in really productive too, James. It's no surprise you don't have a girlfriend; I'd kill myself after one day with you."

"Kit, you don't mean that."

"Of course I do. James, it is like I'm being followed and I can't spend my whole life trying to please you and Eric since you both are intent on despising each other."

"Kit, you've spent almost everyday with me since we were nine. You can't mean that."

Damn James Potter and his logic. Kit took a breath and glared down at him. "You know what, James? I'm tired of this. If it came down between you an Eric, I would pick him. He doesn't come with baggage, nor does he try and control who I date. He doesn't hurt my family and I actually enjoy his company."

"I knew you first," James snapped after a moment's silence, as if that explained everything.

"Excuse me! You think that just because you knew me first means you have say on who I date? James, I'm not a house elf; you don't own me or tell me what to do." Kit huffed and rolled her eyes at his childish behaviour.

"I knew you first. I knew you before you were grown up or beautiful. I knew you when you were cute and annoying and thought it was fun to jinx my uncles. Before you knew who you were, when you were scared and insecure. I know the Kit that no one else sees. I know you better than anyone and it kills me to see someone love you without knowing you." James stood abruptly and left her blindsided.

What ever she'd been expecting, it hadn't been that. She felt as if someone had knocked the air out of her.

* * *

**Ooh, drama! Things are changing quickly for Kit. There is more Malfoy drama to come in the next chapter.**

**Drop me a line, let me know what you think.**

**Dahlia  
**


	10. Chapter 10

Kit wasn't sure how long she'd stayed in the Room of Requirement, just sitting numbly on the destroyed couch once the feeling had left her legs and she'd toppled onto the bare furniture. The things James said just didn't make sense, as if she refused to believe him. She didn't want to believe him at all; Eric could get to know her just fine. But the way he'd said it, something in his voice made her stop. She looked down at her hands as they hung limply between her knees and let out a defeated sigh. What was she supposed to do now? She didn't want to agree with James, that just because he had known her the longest meant that no one else could know her that well. But James did know. He knew just about everything there was to Kit. He'd been with her through the awkward stage of pre-puberty and when he was too young to say otherwise, he sat with her when she was feeling down. With a shock, she realized that until recently, he still sat with her when she wasn't feeling great.

But what made him such an authority on what she wanted or needed? If he felt so strongly about he, why hadn't he told her sooner, instead of waiting until he could ruin her relationship with Eric? She knew that James liked attention, but that was going a bit too far. Whatever excuse he had wasn't enough to condone ruining her relationship with all her friends. Her actions before had obviously upset Rose and she was willing to bet Remus, Peter and Sirius didn't appreciate her behaviour. In one fell swoop, James had managed to muck up everything.

Kit hung her head and tried to push the rare, frustrated tears away. The little voice in her head, the one that always twists the blade, pointed out that if James was here, he'd been holding her. Of course, that revelation only upset Kit more and as she curled on her side, she willed the world to forget about her for an hour.

It would be drastic to say that her whole life had been turned up on its head, but in the small span of just over a month she'd gained a boyfriend, nearly lost him, lost her best friend in place for an unrequited love, watched her cousin try to resist the urge to fall for Sirius's charms and fail, she'd pissed off Remus and couldn't ever apologize enough and she'd befriended a Slytherin. So maybe her life had turned on itself, but hadn't given her enough time to get her bearings. Kit clutched onto the couch and tried to sort out why she felt so disoriented. She never got this upset, most of the time she just yelled or threw things, but something in James' words had cut her try as she might, she couldn't find the energy to truly be angry at James. At least, not at that moment.

So instead of getting up and trying to mend broken bridges or yell at someone else or seek a shoulder to lean on, Kit rolled over on the bare couch and closed her eyes.

* * *

Now Kit was missing. Great. Remus rolled his eyes when the clock chimed at six, signalling the beginning of dinner and when everyone was supposed to meet back at the common room. James had been waiting when they'd all arrived, sitting in front of the fire. Sirius had been the first to approach, since Remus had held Rose back. The two had gone off to have a quiet conversation and, thankfully, he hadn't heard anything break from the dorms. Beside him, Rose was growing anxious about Kit's whereabouts. If James knew where she was, he hadn't said anything to Sirius. Remus was just growing tired of the whole ordeal. James and Kit should just put aside their differences and agree to stay friends or try being something more. He didn't want to get in the middle of another fight between the two because if asked to take sides, Remus couldn't make that choice.

James was going about this the wrong way, even Remus, who had little experience with matters of the heart, knew that. He was almost giving Kit and ultimatum, which was a bad idea for anyone you cared for. Kit had every right to be upset about that, but she was acting stranger than she usually would. She was being over dramatic by her own standards. She should have let James know (even the rest of them, too) that she was dating Eric. It had been a shock to the group. One that hadn't been well received by some of them.

But why was Kit obligated to share every detail of her life with them? Weren't they all entitled to some privacy and have the right to say what they wanted, when they wanted to? Then again, she hadn't given him that option when she'd told Rose about him being a werewolf. Groaning, Remus sank to sit on the comfy couch and shook his head. He _hated_ when they fought.

Rose sat beside him and put her head on his shoulder. "This is not good, is it?" she asked and got a weary head shake in return. Rose sighed and fought to urge to go find Kit. She was torn between giving Kit a stern word, hexing her or just begging for the whole thing to be forgotten. She looked down at Peter who was sitting by her legs and gave him a sad smile.

"Do they get back together quickly?" She asked and it took a moment before Peter replied.

"Sometimes. But I've never seen Kit or James this upset." Peter peeked around her to look up the stairs where James and Sirius were. "I hope things work out."

"Me, too," Rose sighed. She looked up the stairs and something occurred to her. "Shouldn't we be looking for Kit?" she asked.

Remus shook his head and Rose looked at him, obviously confused. "Not when there are going to be so many people around. We don't want to make a big deal about it."

"But what if she is out on the grounds? How come James got a search party and Kit does not?" Rose demanded and Remus fought the urge to just say that Kit doesn't deserve a search party, the way she acted. But that was cruel and he felt bad for even thinking it.

"She just needs some time to sort things out." Remus gave Rose a smile before continuing. "As the only one in this group who has any idea what women go on about, I think that's what she needs." Rose wanted to argue, but maybe Kit did need time. Yes, Rosie wasn't pleased about the whole ordeal, but maybe this would all blow over by the next week. Who knows, maybe Kit and James would even be dating then. Rose grinned nervously. Good thing Kit wasn't around.

There was a heavy sigh from behind them and Sirius soon sat beside Rose and put his head on her shoulder.

"Last time James saw her, she was in the Room of Requirement," Sirius said and Remus and Peter nodded with quiet "Oh"s. Rose looked at them all curiously, but Sirius said it was for another day.

"She'll be fine in there. One of us can go tonight to see how she is," Remus said with a sigh. His warm eyes were tired despite the early hour and Sirius looked the same. Rose could feel a tiredness filling her bones, but couldn't figured out why.

"Dinner?" Sirius asked after a moment, and Rose couldn't help the little laugh that came from her lips. Of course he'd be thinking about food. Rose fixed him with a look and tried to stop grinning.

"Two of your friends are going through a crisis and all you can think about is food?" Sirius didn't look abashed in the least.

"Well, there a number of things I'd much rather be doing," the wolfish grin came into place and an arm snaked around her waist, "but I think they might need to sort this out themselves. Why should we all suffer because of it?"

"You are quiet selfish sometimes," Rose pointed out as they stood. "Maybe Kit in is the Great Hall," she said hopefully. Remus shrugged but shared her hope. The four left the common room and entered the calamity of the Great Hall during dinner. The sound of clinking china and loud conversations was comforting and the tension in Rose's shoulder lessened. And as she walked into the Great Hall and scanned the room, searching for the familiar pixie haircut bobbing amongst the other students. And for a moment, Rose was all too excited at seeing her cousin in a head to head conversation with someone. It wasn't until she saw the platinum blond hair that her heart dropped.

"What's she doing?" Rose asked quietly as she walked beside Sirius. Catching her tone, Sirius followed her eyes to where Kit was sitting. Her features were somewhere between sad and frustrated and Malfoy was looking at her intently. Sirius wanted to throttle Kit and at the same time counted his blessings that James wasn't there. But if he ever found out she was hanging around Malfoy, Sirius was certain James would kill him. He gave a huff and pulled Rose to the Gryffindor table. He gave Remus a curt nod and sat down across from him so his back was to the Slytherin table. Remus looked behind him and gave another weary sigh. He looked older suddenly, like the weight of everything was bearing down on him. Rose wondered how long it was until the full moon.

"Things just got ten times worse," Remus muttered, uncharacteristically. He was often tired looking, but he seemed optimistic for the most part and kind. But he just seemed exasperated with the whole mess. Rose, Sirius and Peter were too, so perhaps it wasn't so out of character. It felt like the uphill battle to keep James calm and getting Kit to notice James' feelings for her had been going on forever. Those few weeks felt closer to months, especially as of late. The dinner party Slughorn threw felt like it had been weeks ago, not just the previous night.

"Why?" Rose asked, picking at the food on her plate.

"Where Malfoy is, Snape's never far behind," Sirius said tersely, scanning for the oily boy. Lo and behold, there he was, sitting on the other side of Kit. But Kit wasn't paying him any attention, which was good. Unfortunately, all her efforts were directed at Lucius Malfoy. Sirius knew his family well enough to know his kind looks and consoling words were anything but sincere.

"C'mon, give her some space," Peter said reasonably before tucking into his food. The others followed his suit, albeit with a bit less fervour.

* * *

Kit shook her head as she entered the Great Hall. It was a bit after six and she should have gone back to the common room and told the guys where she saw, but she couldn't bring herself to face them. Selfish and weak, she wanted someone to listen and not judge her. She wanted a shoulder to lean on since she'd finished crying already. She scanned the Great Hall and looked for a familiar face. Eric was nowhere to be seen, but she didn't know if he really wanted to hear what she had to say. To her surprise, she looked at the Slytherin table next and found someone looking right at her. It was unnerving to meet his icy eyes then watch them crinkle into a smile. She smiled back reluctantly and walked over, thankful that she wasn't in her uniform. As it was, she felt like ever eye was on her, she didn't need a bright crest to advertise her betrayal. She slipped into the spot Lucius had opened for her and ducked her head.

"I heard Potter was missing," Lucius said as she sat and Kit looked up at him.

"How many times must I tell you, Katherine? Word travels fast." She shrugged and picked at a dinner roll.

"I just, you know, want to talk to someone." Kit admitted quietly.

"You mean your friends aren't there for you?" Kit's eyes darkened and she shook her head. "But they all jumped to find James, I assume?" Kit's brow crumpled and she glared at her plate as if she was willing it to set on fire. "That's hardly fair," Lucius remarked dryly.

"No, it's not. But maybe something came up," Kit said weakly, but she could see from the look in his eyes that it wasn't enough. They just hadn't looked for her.

"You wanted to talk?" He asked after a moment of silence.

"I don't know. I just wanted to be around someone who wouldn't bring up James."

"Consider the topic closed." Lucius said and told her she should eat.

"Not hungry," was she quiet response.

"Quidditch tryouts are coming up. Don't you want to be on the team?"

"Not if James is the captain." But it nearly broke her heart to give up something she was so passionate about. She didn't think she could handle a whole year of his antics if she and Eric were still dating.

"He said that no one really knows me like he does." Kit said, looking up at Lucius with wide brown eyes. "But that's not true. Other people know me well."

"James is just using arguments he know will hurt you the most." He leant in and shook his head. "He's being spiteful,"

"No, he's not," Kit said, but the more she thought about it, the clearer it became. He was just finding things that mattered to her to try and get a reaction from her. She had counted him as her best friend and when he needed blackmail, he used that. She cared for Eric, so he used him to get to her. Kit felt like crawling in a hole and not coming out until James and his drama was long gone. How could he have treated her like that? Like she was some little kid that he could manipulate using the things she held most dear. Shaking her head, Kit balled her hands into fists.

"Katherine, Potter is nothing but trouble for you. You need to start being around people who truly care for your well-being." Lucius looked over Kit's shoulder to the boy beside her and rose a brow. "Isn't that right, Severus?"

The pale, oily boy glared at Kit, Potter's right hand, and gave Lucius a look. Kit wasn't too keen on being friends with either of them, but she'd turned to Lucius as a last resort. But he apparently knew much more about what her friends were doing than she did. How had Kit been so blind to it all? She shook her head at her own foolishness and saw Snape grimace from the corner of her eye.

"I don't need your friendship," Kit sneered at Snape and received the same look back.

"Neither do I."

Well, she was glad that was settled. Kit found herself believing Lucius' words more and more. He said that she'd taken a dislike to him simply because his friends had taken a strong dislike to James and Sirius. He said he wasn't like his friends and Kit was inclined to believe that after speaking to Snape, whom she found insufferable. He was snobby and rude to almost everyone he met and was a social outcast. He seemed oily, like you could never trust him with a secret since it was so likely to slip right off his tongue the next day. He was smart, from what Kit could tell, but no one ever noticed because no one could look past his awful personality, sneering demeanour and greasy hair.

And if that weren't enough, she'd found out through Lucius that Severus liked Lily Evans. Any possibility of even acknowledging the Slytherin was long forgotten when she'd learnt that. Who could ever like that red-headed goody-two shoes? Besides having told Kit off a number of times for breaking the rules and hanging around the Marauders when she should have been studying, Lily was the first person who had corrected Kit in Charms.

Kit wasn't great with criticism in the first place, but to have someone like Lily Evans point out that she wasn't doing the arm motion properly and attempt to _help_ her was unbearable. It was like Evans had looked down at Kit and decided that a dunce like her needed help. Kit quickly pointed didn't need help from some girl with a rod rammed up her backside and received a detention that night for giving Lily donkey's ears. That had beginning of a very long rivalry. Evans was probably the only person who could hold her own against Kit in Charms and never missed an opportunity to gloat at how well she did on a Potions assignment. There was nothing more irritating that a person who was smart and wanted the whole world to know. Thankfully, Lily had a less than sparkling personality and was terrible at Quidditch and had no sense of adventure. She was the sort of person that would be married right out of school, have three kids and be a homemaker. It disgusted Kit.

So imagine Kit's intense surprise when the week before Quidditch tryouts, James walked into the Great Hall with Evans on his arm. Kit had managed to mend a few of the bridges she'd burnt during her (on-going) fight with James. She and Rose were talking, but Kit knew she'd hurt her cousin. She'd been trying to make it up to her as often as possible and things were beginning to look up. Despite the fact that the week Kit had given Rose to be on her own was long gone, Kit wasn't as protective, something she struggled with at first. But if she wanted Rose to forgive her, she had to be lenient. Remus and Peter were glad to have her back, Remus more so since it meant there wasn't going to be a fight. Kit and Sirius were still hesitant; he was James' best friend and he'd been hurt by what she'd done, but Sirius was just as much friends with Kit as he was with James. The only person Kit refused to speak with was James. They didn't fight, as a matter of fact they didn't acknowledge each other. It was the one thing that hadn't been put right.

Kit was sitting at breakfast, chatting with Rose about Christmas and what she wanted.

"Katherine! I couldn't," Rose said bashfully, but Kit knew better.

"C'mon, Rosie, you've got to want something." Kit said over her cereal to Rose, who was sitting across from her. To her right, Sirius's ears perked up at the conversation.

Rose chewed on her lips as she thought. "There were some beautiful dresses I saw in London," Kit groaned and looked dejectedly down at her breakfast. She hated shopping for clothes, something Rose hadn't forgotten. "Oh, Kit, maybe a broom then?"

"Plan on playing Quidditch?" Kit asked.

"Not really,"

"Not the best investment then," Kit admitted with a smile.

"I don't know, Kit. And what is the point of asking me? Where is the surprise in that? You are very creative, you'll think of something."

Kit sighed heavily, earning a chuckle from Remus. "Fine." Kit wracked her brain for what Rose would even need, much less want.

"Why are you talking about Christmas, anyway? It's hardly November yet," Sirius said. Rose was the first to answer, which was great because Kit didn't have an idea.

"Because, you need to be prepared. What if the store does not have what you want and it's the night before? Or what if you need to order it? Things do not always come in on time." Sirius looked stunned for a moment, which made Kit laugh so hard she dropped her goblet. It was almost like things were back to normal. Then Remus waved at someone behind Kit. She turned around and saw James with Evans on his arm.

Just like that, any shred of normality was shattered.

"Morning," James greeted the group, smiling at everyone but Kit. He pretended he couldn't feel her glare at them as they sat down. Apparently Lily felt the same way.

"Do we have to sit here?" she asked, looking up at James with her too big green eyes. He started and looked down at her, brow creased then said goodbye to the Marauders to sit further down the table. Sirius, who was closest to Kit, put a hand on her shoulder.

"Kit?" he asked quietly. She nodded at him and tried to exhale slowly. Her breath came out in a huff as she watched Evans flick her stupid red hair over her shoulder and bat her eyes at him.

"I thought they hated each other?" Peter said and got a whithering look from Sirius and Remus in return. Kit stood and tossed her bag over one shoulder.

"I'll see you guys in Potions," Kit beat a quick retreat to the library were Eric had said he'd be. She found him surrounded by a pile of Potions textbooks and half a dozen crumpled parchments.

"Hi," Kit said as she cleared a spot to sit in.

"Hey, hon." Eric smiled up at her and gave her a quick peck before looked down at his work in dismay.

"How's it coming?" Kit pointed to his current parchment, almost filled with his cramped writing.

"Better. Why do I leave these things to the last minute?" He asked with a chuckle. Kit wrapped an arm around him and shrugged.

"If you figure out why, let me know." Kit pressed against him on the bench and put her head on his chest.

"What's the matter?" He asked, picking up on her mood. Kit took a breath and looked up at him.

"James is dating Evans now."

"I thought they hated each other," Eric said and Kit nodded. "Well, it's rather petty, if you ask me." Kit looked up at him for an explanation.

"Well, it seems like he's dating her to make you upset. And it seems to be working," He played with a little lock of her hair as he spoke and Kit shook her head. "But you are upset, hon. And I'm not happy with James. No friend would want you upset on purpose."

"Eric, I know you're trying to help and you are, but I really just want to sit with you." Eric nodded at his girlfriend and drew her up onto his lap. She put her head in the crook between his neck and shoulder and sighed. This was what she wanted; someone to hold her when she needed it. He held her close and ran a comforting hand through her hair. Kit sighed and snuggled closer to him. Why couldn't her friends have just left things as they were instead of ruining everything?

* * *

**I've got one more chapter to post tonight and then I think I'm caught up. :) It's been tons of fun writing and posting all of this. Now, the only thing is there might be a bit more waiting time between chapters as I have to write it before I post it.**

**Drop me a line, I'd love to know how you feel about it.**

**Dahlia  
**


	11. Chapter 11

The day was finally upon them; Quidditch tryouts. Kit had woken with a feeling of dread balling in her stomach. The tryouts were going to be held after dinner and run until curfew. Granted, Kit was not happy since not only could she not be at the tryouts, but she couldn't even see them from a window. It didn't help that James was like a child on Christmas morning, jittery with excitement. Evans was never far behind and what bothered Kit the most was that she kept trying to keep James calm. She told him that it was just Quidditch and that he shouldn't be so excited about a _game_. Everyone at Hogwarts knew that Quidditch was basically Potter's lifeline, so the fact that Lily was attempting to change him was more than annoying.

Sirius, Remus and Peter all promised her they'd find a way to get out of detention. James was so busy to offer his help, not that she would have accepted it. But Kit kept her head down, fuming all day. Even as they planned at the afternoon break, she couldn't stop her jaw from clenching.

"We need one more person," Remus mumbled as he looked down at the plan they'd laid out. Kit couldn't be of much help, since she could easily get caught if she planted anything. Sirius would keep Slughorn distracted, Peter was on lookout for stray students and Remus was in charge of actually planting the smoking dungbomb. But they needed one more person to have Kit's broom ready and take her to the tryouts. Peter, Sirius and Remus had to sneak away before they were caught, so they couldn't stick around.

"For what?" A familiar voice said as Eric went to sit beside Kit. He took her hand beneath the table and gave it a squeeze. That alone, and his warm smile, made Kit relax.

"Breaking me out of detention."

"For the tryouts?" Eric guessed it was a stupid question, but he asked nonetheless then nodded at Remus. "Count me in," he shared a loving smile with Kit before bending over the parchment and learning everything he needed.

"I'll give you my broom now, since you can't get into the dorms. Meet me here," she pointed at the corridor by the Great Hall that led to the dungeons.

"Why don't I meet you at the Potions classroom?"

"It'll look like you were in on it if you're waiting for me there. We don't want anyone getting caught." She looked at the parchment for a moment before smiling at the group. "Played properly, it'll just look an accident and we'll get off free."

"I'll have the supplies at dinner, and Peter, Sirius and I will go ahead and plant everything." Remus said.

"Be careful." Kit warned as she rose and went to get her broom.

"You going to try out?" She asked Eric on the way to the common room. He caught up with and held her hand.

"Of course. Now that I don't have detention I'm eager to get back on the team."

"Still you have it after a year of not playing?" Kit teased. She climbed the stairs to her dorm and rose an eyebrow at him from the top step.

"You'll just have to wait and see, won't you?" Kit rolled her eyes at him. She hoped he made it onto the team; it meant more time with him and someone else to listen to besides James.

The dorm was empty, which wasn't surprising. Kit entertained the idea of putting Gillyweed at the bottom of Lily's bed, but decided that it was too much work for such a small prank. Kit bent to get her broom from under her bed and smiled at the gleaming wood. It was an original Nimbus and Kit's fourth broom since attending Hogwarts. Being a Beater was the fastest way to ruin a broom, especially the way Kit played. In the second year the tail of her broom was ripped off by a Bludger during the final game. Third year a Slytherin snapped it in half after Gryffindor beat them two hundred, nothing. Fourth year her favourite broom was destroyed when one of the Beaters on the Ravenclaw team tackled her into the stands. Her broom, along with her left forearm, shattered. Thankfully, nothing had gone wrong in the fifth year, although the Nimbus had seen better days. It was a fast broom, easily maneuverable but stable. She lifted her broom over one shoulder and felt around for her beaters bat. At the end of second year, when it was apparent she and Sirius were going to be on the team for a while, they went out at got their own Beater bats instead of the ones the school used. They had nicer, leather handles and didn't splinter as easily.

Eric was waiting for her in the common room and whistled when he saw her equipment.

"You still have the same broom?" he asked, admiring the intact Nimbus.

"Last year was a tame Quidditch season." She handed her things to him and followed him up to his dorm, where he put them in his trunk.

"I've never understood why girls can come up to the boys dorms, but not the other way around."

Kit sat on the edge of his bed and shrugged. "I guess girls are just more trustworthy,"

"Sure," Eric said, rolling his eyes. He came to sit beside her, his hand holding hers.

"You say that like you don't think it's true," Eric simply shrugged. "Okay, how about this. Would you like Sirius Black having access to those dorms?"

Eric's eyes went wide and he shook his head with a laugh. "I guess you're right," Kit sidled up against him and wrapped her arms around him.

"Thanks for doing this,"

Eric smiled at her, his eyes soft and lovely. "I'd do anything for you," his chest rumbled when Kit blinked up at him, apparently taken by surprise.

"Anything?" She asked coyly, her face lighting up.

"Oh, Merlin. What did I do?" Eric laughed. "Alright, anything."

"Prance around in pink briefs?"

"I do that already, love,"

"Really? Why have I never seen this?"

"I didn't want to ruin my image," Eric joked, flicking his hair back and making the most absurd face Kit had ever seen.

"What an image it is," Kit joked as she pulled a face.

"Oi!" Eric pushed her back onto the bed and pinned her down with a smirk. "Take it back,"

"No way,"

"C'mon," His hands found her waist, slowly trailing up her sides until she squirmed.

"No,"

"Kit," Eric teased, holding her waist. She screeched when he began tickling her, laughing and thrashing around until she could flip him over.

"Ha!" Kit yelled triumphantly. She lifted her leg and leapt over him before running down the stairs.

"Get back here!" Eric followed her down and chased her through the common room.

"You'll have to catch me first," Kit teased from the other side of the couch. She blew him a kiss then ran for the portrait, Eric on her heels. The two left a number of confused people behind them as they ran though the castle. Twice they passed a professor, but were gone before they could have points deducted.

"Gotcha!" Eric's voice echoed in the empty corridor as he caught Kit and held her tight. Panting, Kit leaned against the wall and laughed. Eric put his forehead against hers and smiled.

"You're fast,"

"Mhh-mm," was Kit's eloquent response. She didn't know if it was the excitement of the run, or what, but when Eric's lips gazed hers, she reached out and pulled him closer, a warmth in her lower back spurring her. Evidently feeling the same thing, Eric held her waist and kissed her deeply. He felt so nice, so warm. She could feel the bricks pressing against her back as Eric pushed himself closer. The warmth spread through her as she reached out to hold Eric as tightly as possible.

"And here I thought you were upset about Quidditch try outs," someone mused from behind Eric. With a small groan, the light sound lost beneath Eric's grumble, she looked over his shoulder to see Sirius. He stood with his arms crossed and fixed her with a serious look. She rolled her eyes at him and waved a hand for him to leave. She'd done the same for him too many times to count, the least he could do was return the favour. When she didn't hear him move, she sighed loudly.

"Go away, Black. I'm a bit occupied." Eric's grinned against her neck as he trailed light kisses along her skin. She gasped when he found a soft spot just behind her ear.

"I can see that,"

"Then why aren't you leaving?" To make her point stronger, she hooked one of her legs around Eric's legs, letting her foot run along the back of his calf. Eric shivered against her and told Sirius to leave, albeit less politely than Kit had.

"It's important," Sirius said, his voice hard with what Kit assumed to be anger. Letting out a cry of frustration, she unlatched from Eric and faced Sirius. He looked pointedly at Kit's boyfriend. "Alone,"

"Merlin, Sirius. You're so annoying!" Kit said. "Leave," she heard him run down the hall and bent her head to lean against Eric. They both sighed and came to the same realization; the mood was gone. To save them any awkward chat, the bell rang, signalling class was about to start.

"Kit?" Eric asked as she went to get her things.

"Hmm?" she turned to face him and saw he was blushing slightly. "What is it?" He drew her closer and took a deep breath, steadying himself for something.

"Next time, let's try not to get interrupted." Eric's brown eyes were smoldering as Kit giggled, but she sobered when she caught his mean.

"Oh," She blushed too, "I think that could be arranged." He captured her lips in a deep kiss that left her breathless.

"Oh," was all she could manage as she walked into Transfiguration with none of her books.

"Where were you?" Remus asked as she scooted next to him. Remembering something, Kit held a hand up to tell Remus to wait as she whacked Sirius on the arm.

"Thanks, you great git." Sirius simply smirked from his seat, leaning back on the back legs of his chair. Kit kicked them out from under him with a smile. She'd been waiting to do that since the beginning of the year.

"Oi!" Sirius rubbed his head and glared up at her.

"Have I ever interrupted you when you were with a girl?" She asked.

"Every time I try to talk to Rose,"

"That is an exception. Any time besides that?"

"I suppose not,"

"Then please return the favour." Kit asked before turning back to a surprised Remus.

"You spent the rest of the break with Eric?"

"He is my boyfriend." Kit said, but her brow creased when she noticed Remus staring at something on her neck. "What?"

Sirius craned his head to see and burst out laughing. "Aw, he left his mark on you, Kit." Kit growled at him and looked down to see the beginnings of a hickey on her neck. Great.

* * *

Kit was distracted for the rest of the day. By the thought of the guys springing her from detention, the try outs and the promise in Eric's words. She ate at dinner but didn't taste anything. Eric sat beside her, his hand warm against her leg. She smiled guiltily at him and trailed her fingers along the top of his thigh.

"You alright?" Peter asked when Eric noticeably jumped and Kit smirked at him.

"Just fine," Kit said while smiling at the blond beside her. Remus laughed, but shared a look with Sirius that Kit did not like. James was sitting with them, his arm around Lily.

"You going to be at tryouts, Dennings?" James asked.

"Of course." He looked down at Kit and rose his brows with a grin. "I might be a bit late," Kit beamed at him and snuggled closer. Of course, Remus, Peter and Sirius knew what they were talking about. James was painfully out of the loop on this one, something that Kit didn't particularly mind.

"I've got to get to detention," Kit remarked. She rose and kissed Eric goodbye, mumbling another thank you against his lips.

She put a hand on Remus's shoulder and whispered, "Is everything in place?" Remus nodded up at her before shooing her off.

"Don't want you to be late!" He called as she left the Great Hall. She had a jump in her step as she walked down to the dungeons. Realizing it, she slowed and made herself seem unhappy. She didn't want to tip Slughorn off.

"Right on time, Miss Ruskova." Slughorn nodded at a pile of dirty cauldrons and went back to his marking. Kit nodded at him and went to work half-heartedly. All she had to do was set the dungbomb off with a flick of her wrist and she'd be gone. She bent her head and feigned worked extra hard to get the burnt crust of some potion off the side of the cauldron. Sliding her wand out, she flicked it at the storeroom and went back to work. It was only a few moments later that an awful stench began to fill the room.

"What in Merlin's name is that?" Slughorn asked, and went to investigate. Kit followed him, her tie pulled around her nose and mouth.

"One of the younger classes must have spilt the ingredients," Kit said, realizing that not only had Remus hidden the dungbomb, he'd moved many of the jar around and toppled over a few. She had to remember to thank him for that later.

"Eugh, Miss Ruskova, there isn't much you can do, especially with this smell. You're excused for the night."

"But, sir, surely I could do something," he didn't need to know how eager she was to leave.

"No, this is dangerous. I should deal with this personally."

"I know you can fix it, sir," Kit beamed at him (as much as was possible through a tie) and all but ran out of the corridor. Eric was leaning against the wall, exactly where he'd said he'd be. He kissed her quickly before running out to the pitch with her. He gave her the supplies and with a final encouraging embrace, he ran out onto the field. Kit stayed a bit back, checking her broom and the stands of the pitch. She saw a large, white furry hat and Rosie's face poking out from beneath it. She waved, but faltered when she saw Lily sitting beside her. Kit went to say something but James called out to her.'

"Stop wasting time, Kit!" She dutifully jogged over and stood beside Sirius. James was standing in the middle of a semicircle of new recruits and old team members.

"You've all come here because you want to be on the Gryffindor Quittich Team, otherwise known as the winning team," this got a round of laughter, which James fed off of. "There are a few spots to fill from last year's team, but I warn the old members; if a new kid is better than you, kiss your position goodbye." His eyes lingered for a moment too long on Eric, the threat more than obvious. Eric smirked back at him and mounted his broom with the others.

"Start with laps around the pitch. This is just to see your handling," he blew a whistle and everyone took off. Sirius and Kit flew together and Kit saw he had his beater bat hanging from his belt.

"You seem pretty confident," she said as they flew around. The newer guys were behind them, but so far no one had fallen off of their broom.

"So do you,"

"I sincerely doubt that there are two people who could replace us as Beaters," Sirius laughed loudly, his head thrown back. Even with his eyes closed, he made the turn at the edge of the pitch, amazing the students behind him.

"I have one request for this year," Kit said.

"What would that be?"

"Don't shag any of the new girls. We don't want a repeat of last year." That past year, Sirius had shagged the two Chasers, who were two years older than him. During their final game, they found out they had both slept with Sirius. Instead of hurting Sirius (which was the smart answer) they started fighting with each other in the middle of the game. Ravenclaw won by default because the two girls couldn't put aside their differences for one match.

Sirius laughed again and nodded. "I'd like to win this year."

"Me too," on James' whistle, they landed and were the first to receive instructions.

"I want to test agility. You two fly around and try to knock them off their brooms. Feint, get them to chase you. Play like it's an actual game." James seemed very serious about the whole thing, something Kit should have expected. Kit nodded seriously back, but couldn't keep the smile from blossoming onto her lips.

"Ready?" She asked Sirius once they were in the air.

"I think between the two of us, we can whittle out the useless ones," Kit wouldn't have been so mean about it, but he was right. This was the fastest way to thin out the crowd. Kit moved to fly beside a young second year. He looked up at her, surprised then smiled. She smiled back before edging him into a race. Nodding, he pushed his broom as fast as it could go, which was rather impressive.

"Follow me!" She yelled back at him. She weaved through the crowd of people Sirius was working with then dipped to fly so close to the ground her toes trailed through the grass. Looking back, she saw he determinedly on her tail. With a smirk, she pulled up lightening fast and few almost vertically up until she was level with the highest stand. The boy followed her, though it took a bit longer to get the climb.

"What broom do you have?" she asked.

"Comet,"

"Impressive," Kit nodded then went back to thinning the crowd. She saw Denis, the keeper from the previous five years working to find the good ones. After a quick nod, Kit found a group of girls on broomsticks who were ogling Sirius.

"Trying out?" Kit asked as she flew over.

"Yeah," one said, not even looking at Kit.

"Then follow me,"

"Can't Sirius work with us?" one girl whined.

"No, he's busy. Come on." Actually, he was busy talking to James. Kit watched as they exchanged words then Sirius went about testing Eric. Sirius led him around an awful route, full of sharp turns and inclines. They wound around the goal posts, flew over the stands, anything to get Eric to show a weakness. Pushing that frustration away, Kit led the six girls onto the pitch and took them through a course. Apparently she hadn't pushed all her frustration away as she was leading them through the same sort of suicide lap. Oh well, they didn't need weak players on the team. By the end only one girl was still following her. Kit slowed and wiped the sweat from her brow. Grateful for the break, the girl stopped to catch her breath.

"What's your name?"

"Amy Clarke. I'm in second year."

"I'm Kit Ruskova," Kit held her hand out and shook Amy's.

"Oh, I know." Amy saw Kit's confusion and explained. "Denis is my older brother. He says you're one to beat. Judging by that try out, I'd have to agree."

"You're really good, Clarke." Kit looked around and saw that groups of students were leaving the field, apparently having not made the team. Slowly flying over to the remaining people, Kit talked with Amy.

"Is everyone in your family great at Quidditch?"

"Yeah, I've got a younger brother too. He'll be here in two years." She laughed for a moment. "With a guy like our dad, it's hard not to be in Quidditch." Kit nodded and dismounted in the group. There were a good number of people left, enough to fill the team twice.

"Good. You guys are good. But we need great. What position were you hoping for?" James sorted the group into four smaller groups. Kit and Sirius looked grudgingly at the three people who wanted to be Beaters. It became apparent after a few minutes that they had no skill aside from muscle. They wanted to be Beaters simply for the violence of it and had no tact for strategy. Having gotten rid of the competition, they watched the rest of the hopefuls. Or at least Kit did; Sirius had already taken to his adoring fans.

"How is it going?" Rose asked Kit when she flew over. They weren't needed on the ground and it was easier to see the progress from up in the stands. Kit floated in front of them, perched on her broom.

"Good, it's a good lot this year." Kit scanned the group and pointed at the small Amy Clarke. "I hope she makes the team. She's the only one trying out for Seeker and we need a new one." Tammy had graduated the previous year and they couldn't have a team without a Seeker. "See the boy at the hoops? That's her older brother, Denis. Their father is on the National Team for the World Cup.

"What about your position? Beater?" Rose asked, looking at Sirius and huffing at his antics. Kit scoffed and waved her hand.

"Not a problem. Already gone." Kit said.

"And James?" Lily asked from beside Rose. Kit surveyed her for a moment before replying.

"Honestly, he has nothing to worry about. He's a great Chaser." Kit said truthfully, and went to ask why Lily even cared, but a look from Rose stopped her. "It'll be a good team," Kit was distracted by a loud shout from the pitch. Eric was on his back and James was on his broom a little ways off, his expression somewhere between smug and worried.

"What happened?" Kit asked, kneeling down by Eric. He let out a groan as he sat up.

"I was testing him," James explained, but she saw the Beater's bat in his hand.

"So you aimed a bludger at him from four feet away," Kit hissed, looking at him incredulously. "Potter, you're so immature." Kit eased Eric to his feet and led him to the change rooms.

"What a prick," Kit muttered as she set Eric down. "How is it?"

Eric shrugged and looked away.

"Eric Dennings, if you're hiding something because I'm a girl and you don't want to look weak, cut it out." Kit stood before him with her hands on her hips, one eyebrows raised.

"It's just a bruise."

"I'm a Beater, don't try that. I know what damage it can do. Come on," she eased his shirt off and saw a bright red patch on his stomach. Having been in the same situation too many times to count, she felt around his ribs. He gave a little hiss of pain but when Kit felt it again, she thought it wasn't broken.

"You're going to be black and blue come morning," she said as she took a seat beside him on the bench. "But nothing's broken as far as I can tell." She put an arm around him and kissed him softly.

"James is a dead man," Kit said and Eric laughed quietly, moaning a second later.

"As much as I appreciate it, I'd rather leave that on the field. No sense in getting into a fight about it, babe." Eric said.

_So much better than James,_ Kit thought as she kissed him. They were both sweaty from practice, but they were to preoccupied to notice. Kit was reminded of the fact he wasn't wearing a shirt when she ran her fingers down his back. His hands found the edge of her shirt and ran along her back. Eric shifted and began to push her back to lie down on the bench.

"If I knew this was going to happen, I'd make a habit of getting hit more often," Eric said, his voice thick with something as his hands ran along the hem of her skirt. "By the way, never wear a skirt when you play Quidditch." He pinched her, making her jump against him. His lips were just lowering down to catch hers again when someone stomped in.

"James sent me to check on Eric,"

"For fuck's sake, Sirius!" Did he have a shag detector or something? Just an uncanny habit for walking in on her and Eric when things were heating up. "He's fine,"

"More than that evidently," Sirius remarked. Kit couldn't see him, but imagined him leaning against the entrance, arms crossed.

"Sirius! Leave!"

"Everyone is leaving the pitch, just so you know."

"Good," Kit heard him leave and turned to Eric with a grimace.

"Sorry about that,"

"Not your fault, babe." Eric bent his head and caught her lips again. She shivered when he started lifting the edge of her shirt, the chilly air making her skin tighten with goosebumps. Her heart hammered against her chest with a sudden realization of what was going to happen. Her shirt was halfway up her ribcage and Eric was moving to peel it right off. Suddenly, she wasn't so sure.

"Eric," she mumbled against his lips when it became obvious that he wasn't going to let her pull away.

"Yeah, babe?" His fingers grazed her leg, lifting it to wrap around his waist.

"I'm not sure about-" her hesitations were cut short, thankfully, by his low groan. He eased off of her and held his ribs.

"Maybe there are some that are broken," Kit said, her hands shaking as she pulled her shirt down. He gently pulled his on and they walked back to the castle. He kept a firm grip on her, despite his side. She tried to return his grins, but found herself faltering almost every time. She dropped him off and made a lame excuse about having to talk to James about the team then ran from the Hospital Wing.

"Katherine?" A smooth voice asked when she slowed to lean against the wall halfway between the common room and the Great Hall. It was almost curfew, not that Kit payed any attention.

"Lucius, hi," Kit said quietly, looking up to see him standing over her.

"Rosy cheeks? Katherine, what have you been up to?" Lucius sat down beside her and let her lean against him.

"It's cold outside, that's all." She really wasn't comfortable talking to Lucius about what she was feeling. Not that she even knew what she was feeling. She was upset for a reason she didn't think she could explain. She liked Eric and they'd known each other for a long time. She trusted him. So why did it feel so wrong? Why was she so scared about something that had only seemed natural that morning? But at the same time she was embarrassingly curious. What would have happened if they'd kept going. Well, she knew what would happen, she wasn't that naive. But what would it feel like? Would be like those romantic novels she snuck from her mother's room in her fourth year? There were so many things about it that she wanted to know about at the same was hesitant to even explore.

"You're lying to me," Lucius remarked dryly. She was, but she figured he'd just have to live with that. But her concrete resolve diminished when he turned to her and unleashed the full force of his stormy eyes on her. Normally, it wouldn't have any effect on her (at least, she hoped as much), but she was a bit of a wreck from the events. There was a strange feeling in her gut she couldn't get to go away and seeing Lucius's eyes ablaze like they were did little to quell the flame. She was confused, greatly so, and wanted some answers.

"Have you ever wanted something even though it doesn't feel right? You've been told it's bad but you're still curious,"

Lucius looked at her evenly as she bit her lip in despair. She wasn't like this normally, and it was a nice change from the bold, self-assured Katherine. He nodded at her and before she realized what was happening, he bent down to caress her.

"What!" Kit jumped back and kept an arms length between them. "What the hell?" In his defense, Lucius kept his cool despite Kit's shriek. Her eyes were too wide, her face too pale.

"You spoke of something forbidden. I only assumed..."

"Don't." Kit snapped, her already confused state worsened by this turn of events. Now she felt guilty to boot.

"I apologize," Lucius said, his voice dripping with sincerity. She looked at him warily, and stood without giving him an answer. "Katherine,"

"What, Lucius? I'm tired, hurt, confused and I'm working my way up to agitated." Kit deflated a little as she leaned against the wall. She was just tired, completely and utterly so, of drama and confusion and feelings that she didn't know how to control or react to.

"I am sorry. I hope this doesn't effect our friendship." That was it; a year ago, Kit would have sworn Malfoy was amongst her greatest enemies, now she was counting him as a friend. Kit liked being spontaneous so long as the constants in her life remained unchanged. James was no longer a friend, Eric was turning out to be something different that she'd originally thought.

"I honestly don't know, Lucius. Just give me until tomorrow morning, please." Lucius nodded and offered to escort her to the common room.

"I really don't need Sirius on my case, too. But thanks for the offer." Kit slowly ascended the stairs, her feet dragging up each stone step. She gave up and sat in the corridor outside the common room, unable to convince herself to move. the portrait opened and Rose came out. Kit half wished she wouldn't notice her, but of course Rose did and she immediately began fussing about her.

"Are you alright? Oh, Kit, we had no idea where you were. And after James disappearing before." Rose caught sight of her cousin's face and stopped dead. "What is wrong?"

"Rosie," was all Kit managed before latching onto her cousin. Rose murmured comforting things to Kit in Russian, holding her close. Kit didn't cry, but held onto Rose's shoulders, just finding comfort in that. And as Rose spoke softly to her, Kit's eyes dropped and she was soon asleep against Rose. Setting her against the floor gently, Rose poked her head into the common room.

"Kit has fallen asleep. Can one of you carry her to bed?" Rose asked and saw James get up but be held back by a biting look from Lily. Sirius nodded and followed Rose out into the hall.

"I can't take her to her dorm, but she can sleep in my bed tonight,"

"Without your company, I assume," Rose asked as Sirius bent to pick up the little Beater. Even sleeping, Kit's face showed signs of stress. She didn't know if Sirius noticed or not, but Rose certainly did. Kit stirred as Sirius walked through the common room. Rose caught James' eye and saw a flash of concern from behind hid glasses. She gave him a small, sad smile as she climbed the stairs behind Sirius. He deposited her onto his bed and Rose pulled a blanket over her.

* * *

**There it is, the last chapter for tonight. And I'm over 30 000 words! I hope you enjoyed this chapter and hopefully the whole fic. Let me know what you think.**

**Dahlia**


	12. Chapter 12

Kit woke early the next day, despite the strange happenings of the night before. Feeling restless, she gently removed herself from the bed, trying to not to disturb the sleeping Rose beside her. A quick glance around the room revealed that James and Sirius were missing from their beds, although Sirius's absence was to be expected. She tiptoed across the hall to the girls dorm and sighed. She was sore from the tryouts and was in need to a nice long shower. The bathroom was empty, as would be expected at two-thirty in the morning, but Kit was glad for the solitude. The water was scalding hot, perfect for relaxing her tense, sore muscles. She scrubbed at her face and emerged a few moments later, skin steamy and soft.

A light snore came from Lily's bed and Kit knew she couldn't go back to sleep, so she quietly dressed in a pair of sweats and threw a heavy sweater over top. Donning her favourite scarf, hat and gloves, she snuck out to the Hogwarts grounds. Chilly air rushed to great her as she slipped out of one of the secret passages just by the Gryffindor Tower. The residual warmth was trapped by her sweater, thankfully, and she walked the grounds quietly. There was something about a clear, frosty night that Kit had always loved. Her feet left prints in the light snow and she didn't bother to cover them up as she wandered; they'd be gone by morning. Her feet led her to the edge of the lake, a place she'd spent many nights with the boys. It was a place she associated with the best nights of her life.

Sinking down onto the pebbled shore, she recalled the first night she'd ever had firewhiskey. She and Sirius had neatly finished off a bottle. She recalled singing loudly with him, an arm around his shoulder, the words all slurring into one. Then there'd been that time where Peter dropped his favourite watch onto the shore and they all spent the better part of a weekend searching for it. They used have competitions to see who could swim to the other shore the fastest. She'd spent the first night of this year at the lake with Rosie and the gang. Things had changed since then. Kit lowered her eyes and played with the pebbles at her feet. There was a crunching sounds as someone joined her. Her lips twitched as she remembered the last time she'd sat like that.

"You have a habit of finding me, Lucius," Kit joked, not raising her eyes.

"Does Mr Malfoy make a habit of finding you, Miss Ruskova?" Kit snapped her head up and saw her Headmaster sitting beside her. For a moment she was confused as she watched him mirror her movements.

"Professor, with all due respect, what are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same thing. Do you make a habit of wandering the grounds unattended after curfew?"

Kit smiled at him and shrugged. "I suppose," she said without a hint of embarrassment or bashfulness. "Though, sitting beside the greatest wizard of my time is hardly unattended."

"Ah, flattery, Miss Ruskova," Dumbledore's eyes twinkled at her as his face creased with a smile. "I often find the lake a very soothing place,"

Kit nodded at looked out over the chilly lake. It wasn't iced over, but frost clung to the edges and Kit knew by looking that the water was frigid. Nothing moved across its surface, so the lake was glass smooth. The Giant squid wasn't restless, as it so often was. For a moment, Kit felt completely alone with Dumbledore. The lights of the castle were behind her and there were no sounds around them. It wasn't a sad or unnerving feeling, but it was odd. Turning to look at him, she wondered if Dumbledore had so much magic that everything around him bowed to his ability. Did animals cease their movement around him?

"You know, Miss Ruskova, we had to pull many strings to allow Rosalinda admittance to Hogwarts,"

" We're all very thankful for that, sir," But he kept talking as if she hadn't interrupted.

"Don't let that go to waste," He rose, much quicker than should be possible for a man of his age and looked down at Kit.

"What do you mean?" Kit followed him as he began to walk back to the castle. His dark robes billowed around him and a cool wind caught the edge of his beard. It swung as he walked, almost like it had a mind of its own.

"We aren't oblivious to student life. Teaching is only half the job of a professor," He looked at her, willing her to understand. She nodded slowly and met his gaze.

"So, you know about what goes on with the students,"

"Mr Black should learn to not boast so loudly about his triumphs," he said in a voice that was light and joking. Kit laughed out loud, remembering to tell Sirius that Dumbledore knew all about his exploits in the morning.

"Sir, if you know so much, maybe you could give me some insight," Dumbledore shifted and stood patiently in front of her. After a moment's hesitation, Kit said, "What changed?" Apparently he didn't need any more clarification than that, as he chuckled and looked at her over his glasses.

"Sometimes, the heart can make people act in strange ways," With a last meaningful glance, Dumbledore walked into the castle and left Kit on the steps. Well, that was helpful, she thought sarcastically. that last look had gone over her head and quite possibly left her more confused than he had that morning.

Kit shook her head and blew the air out of her cheeks. She'd never understand her Headmaster. She pushed open the heavy doors and walked slowly back to the common room. She wasn't worried about getting caught since Dumbledore himself had been with her. The large clock above the fireplace boasted four in the morning as Kit entered the empty common room. She wasn't exactly tired anymore, so she picked up a forgotten book from one of the tables and settled into the overstuffed couch.

It was on of those awful romance novels that middle-aged witches always read about a down-on-her-luck witch fresh out of a bad relationship who finds a new and rather surprising love in the shy, geeky assistant at the Ministry. Kit had read a few of them (stolen from her mother's bookcase, of course) and have never truly enjoyed them, but she needed something to pass the time. She was just reading about Mary (the witch) and David (the geeky assistant)'s first date when someone joined her on the couch. She lowered the novel to see Remus sitting beside her, he face ghostly pale and a sheen of sweat clinging to him.

"Moony," Kit sat up and rubbed his shoulders. He didn't look good at all. "Do you need something?"

"A cure?" he asked feebly, a hint of sarcasm in his voice. Kit smiled back at him slowly. It was a few days away from the full moon and he was feeling the worst of it.

"Well, in the mean time, anything else I can get for you?"

Ignoring her question, he fixed her with a feverish glare. "Why did you tell Rose I was a monster?"

"I can't believe you're bringing that up. You're not a monster," Kit had the same argument with him every few months. Everyone had the same argument with him every few months.

"I am. Kit, I am."

"How? How on earth could you be a monster? You stay far away from any humans when you change, you take every precaution. You bite yourself for Merlin's sake!"

"I'm murderous! I have a craving for blood. How is that normal?" Remus's eyes blazed, something that should have been a warning.

"So, everything that has a craving for blood is a monster? Vampires, werewolves and lions are monsters?" Kit hissed back at him.

"Yes. This is a disease, Kit. It can't be cured. A disease is eating away at my humanity,"

"Oh, stop it. That's not you talking, Remus. It's the wolf,"

"I am the wolf."

"You're not," Kit spoke softly, remembering the last she'd had with him. "You're not a wolf. That's not who your truly are,"

"I am!" Remus yelled, jumping and growling in Kit's face. She jumped but didn't fight back. His gold eyes searched her face wildly. "What aren't you fighting back?" he grumbled.

"Because the last time I fought back, I said some things I didn't mean." Kit slid off the couch and crouched in front of him. "Remus John Lupin, you are a kind guy, caring and way too smart to be hanging with the likes of me. This isn't you talking, Remus. I know it isn't." Kit remembered complaining about how things kept changing around her, but this monthly occurrence stayed constant no matter what. Knowing she shouldn't, Kit found the spat reassuring.

Remus held her gaze furiously before he came to and his eyes went wide with horror. "Katherine, I'm sorry,"

"Don't be." She hugged him tightly and stayed like that for a while. "It's been a rough night," Remus pulled back and looked questioningly at her. With a sigh, she sat beside him and confided everything with him. How angry she was James for his behaviour, how she felt about Eric, her strange friendship with Malfoy, the events after the Quidditch tryouts and her odd conversation with Dumbledore.

After it all, she hung her head and sighed. "I don't know anything anymore." Remus smiled sadly at her and shrugged.

"I'm not exactly the person to come to for this sort of stuff. Have you talked to Sirius?" Remus asked harmlessly, but got a whithering look in response.

"Not an option. He'd never let me live any of it down." Kit looked around and bit her lip. "I just wanted to talk, you know?"

"You're not the same Kit you were before Rose got here. Last year you would have rather stuck a fork in your eye that talk about feelings," Remus laughed.

"I guess Sirius had been rubbing off on me." She wrinkled her nose at Remus. "But this doesn't make me a sap."

"I'd never dream of it," Remus said and she hugged him for it.

"You're the person to talk to. James and Sirius either don't care or don't get it."

"I wouldn't be so quick to say they don't care," Remus said thoughtfully. Kit rolled her eyes and shook his shoulders.

"What is it with cryptic answers today? Can I just get a straight answer?" Remus thought about that for too long than should have been reasonable. He seemed to seriously consider a question Kit had thought was rhetorical. "Remus?"

"Nothing, just thinking." He looked away and fiddled with the fraying fabric of the couch. Kit gave a frustrated scream and fell back against the pillows.

"People think too much. It's dangerous," Kit joked, glad when Remus joined her. For a moment she'd been worried that another strange problem would spring to life.

"I've never asked, but why do you wake up in the middle of the night? Before the full moon, I mean."

"Insomnia." Remus looked out the frosted window and up at the sky. "It's like I can feel the moon calling to me. I get restless, pent up." he sighed deeply, sounding much older than he was. "Usually, I just unleash it out on whoever's closest."

Kit twisted around so she was lying on the couch with her feet in his lap. She'd spent many nights like this with him. Mainly in his second year when he'd told her about his condition. Before he was too old to cry and be weak, he used to stay up with her and cry from the pain of it. He didn't want to cry in front of the guys, so he would find her and they would stay in the common room until morning and he was all dried out.

Settling into the old routine, Remus moved to sit beneath her knees so she could rub his arm. Evidently following the same thoughts he turned and said, "Thanks," Kit smiled lopsidedly at him and shrugged.

"You're a great friend, Moony. You deserve the best." He made a disgruntled noise but Kit let it pass; pick your battles.

"If you've got so much energy at four in the morning, want to do my Defense homework for me?" Remus laughed loudly at Kit, who pouted back at him. "I wasn't exactly kidding, wolf-boy." Remus still laughed at her until she socked him in the arm.

"Alright, I get the point. Stupid idea," Kit muttered to herself.

"It's not that sort of energy. It's more like I want to run, or hike." Remus looked longingly outside for a moment, the warm embers of the fire bringing his scars to life.

"Well, it just so happens I've got some connections." Kit wagged her eyebrows at him.

"I forgot, you and Dumbledore and best buds, right?" Remus rose an eyebrow at her and laughed when she nodded.

"Don't you know? He's becoming an official Marauder tomorrow,"

"I don't think it's right to haze the Headmaster," The idea of seeing Dumbledore walking, blindfolded, to the top of the Astromony Tower set Kit off and she was laughing so loudly Remus smothered her with a pillow out of fear.

"You'll wake up the whole school with a laugh like that," his face was straining to stay straight.

"Aw, you love it." Kit joked when she could finally breath again.

"You wouldn't be Kit without it," Remus shrugged and was tackled into a hug a moment later.

"I don't know when or who, but you will make some woman very, very happy." She caught his sudden look of doubt and smacked him lightly. "Trust me, I'm a girl. I would know." Kit sat back with a satisfied smile only to be attacked a moment later. Not by Remus, but by a blond force that landed in her lap.

"Bloody hell, woman!" Kit yelled she realized it was Rose. "What are you doing!" Kit felt her heart was going to explode, it had received such a shock. Remus was laughing beside her, amused by Kit's reaction. After a moment, Kit's face broke into a huge grin and she was laughing away with them.

"But seriously, why are you up? And how did I make it into Sirius's bed?" She looked suspicious at Rose and just hoped Rose hadn't been spending the night with the resident playboy.

"You fell asleep in the hall. He carried you to bed." Rose looked away and up the stairs for a moment, something clouding over her face.

"If you'd rather be up there with him, don't let me stop you," Kit teased, but there was a serious question lurking behind the light tones.

"Why be with him when I have two favourite people here, I ask you?" Rose hugged them both before sliding to sit beside Kit as opposed to onto of her.

"Anyone for Exploding Snap?"

"You know how to play?" Kit rose a eyebrow at her cousin, but moved to cut the pack. "You in?" she waved the deck at Remus who put his hands on the table and nodded.

"No mercy?" Kit asked, a challenge in her eyes.

"No mercy," Remus agreed, turning to Rose.

"What is 'no mercy'?" she asked, a bit worried.

"No jumping back from the bang," Kit explained. "We had to enforce it a few years ago when Peter kept ducking to avoid the blow.

"All right, no mercy," Rose smiled at Kit as she began to deal cards. Over the course of four hours, the set fire to the couch, burnt five fingers between them. Rose singed a lock of her hair and Remus almost lost an eyebrow. In her excitement, Kit had slammed her hand onto one of the piles just as Remus caught the other one first. The whole deck exploded in her palm, eliciting a stream of curses from Kit, some Russian, some English. There were scorch marks on the coffee table from one of the move violent rounds.

"Morning, babe," someone mumbled as he stumbled into the common room. Eric leant over the edge of the couch a kissed the top of her head. Kit didn't see the harsh look Rose sent him over her head, but instead twisted around to face him.

"How're the ribs?" she asked, admiring him in his old Quidditch jersey. He was really god looking.

"Sore," Eric rubbed a spot on his side and winced. With a a little smile, Kit leaned over and kissed it gently.

"All better," she said. Remus faked gagging behind her and got a whack on the side of the head for it. "Mature," she chided.

"I could say the same for you," Remus challenged. Kit stuck her tongue out at him and settled back into the couch.

"What were you doing up so early?" Eric asked as he wrapped his arms around her from behind the couch. Kit ran her hands along his strong arms and sighed.

"Wouldn't you like to know," she said, trying to make her voice mysterious. The attempt failed when Remus told Eric they'd been up talking.

"You were awake the whole night?" Eric asked, something strange in his voice.

"Not the whole night. Why?" Kit turned to face him, curious.

"Nothing," he caught her look and tried again. "Nothing, I just don't want you getting to tired. You feeling sick?"

Kit laughed at his concern and shook her head. "No, I just couldn't sleep."

"Well, you could have come to my dorm. I would have taken care of that," Eric rose a brow at her and let his hands play along her waist. She giggled and squirmed against the couch.

"Eric!" Kit exclaimed, not hearing Rose's quiet noise of disgust.

"She was fine down here," Rose pointed out with a look at Eric.

"I just want to make sure my girlfriend's okay,"

"That's sweet," Kit kissed him quickly then jumped up to change for the day.

* * *

The first Hogmeade trip of the year was something everyone waited for. For third years, it was the first time, but for everyone else it was returning to that little slice of heaven just outside the school. Kit loved Hogmeade, everything about it. The Three Broomsticks or the Hog's Head if she was feeling a bit more daring. Zonko's was always visited by the Marauders, so much so that the owner knew better than to ask questions about their purchases. Kit was more than excited to go, but in her excitement, she'd forgotten about her previous promise to her cousin.

"Kit, I am excited for you to show me around Hogsmeade," Rose said that morning in the common room. She supposed someone had let in her as she rubbed her bleary eyes. When Kit could finally see straight, she saw that Rose was sitting on the couch with Remus, Sirius and James. Lily was sitting by James' legs while reading a textbook. Overachieving goody-two shoes, Kit thought bitterly. But her thoughts were cut short as she realized what Rose had just said.

"Oh, Rosie, I'm so sorry! I promised Eric to a proper date today," Kit rushed over and tried to reason with Rose, but she was already storming out. She was muttering rapidly in Russian but Kit caught the word bastard amongst the fray. Kit's brows rose and she followed Rose out, but the portrait was slammed in her face.

"Great," Kit mumbled as she rubbed her face. "Please tell me one of you is taking her," They all shook their heads back at her.

"She said she was really looking forward to you showing her around." Remus said and put a hand on Kit's shoulder as she slumped into the chair beside him.

"She even turned me down," Sirius remarked, astounded by the simple fact.

"I can't say I'm disappointed. You still have a date, don't you?" Kit asked, running a hand through her hair. James snorted behind her when the ends all stood up.

"Anastasia Turner," he said. Kit rolled her eyes at him and looked to Remus.

"I really messed up this time, didn't I?"

Remus chuckled and nodded sadly. "Apparently so," he rose and ruffled her hair. "Rose'll forgive you. Eventually," the gang laughed at her when she openly glared at Remus.

"You're supposed to be the nice one," she complained as she climbed back up the stairs. She should have remembered that she'd promised Rose a tour of Hogsmeade. She was a horrible cousin. Mood dampened slightly, Kit took her time getting ready. It was rather chilly outside, so she chose warm leggings and an over-sized Falmouth Falcons sweater. Kit rummaged through her trunk, searching for the thick wool socks her mother insisted on packing every year. They were grey and far too big for Kit, but they were so comfy and warm that she didn't mind. She pulled them on and let them bunch around her ankles before finding her boots and a warm hat. While it wasn't the giant snowball of white fur Rose so often donned, Kit's was bright red and too long so it hung off the back of her head. Although she was boiling by the time she was finally changed, she knew one second outside and she'd be grateful for the extra layers.

"Ready?" Eric asked when she walked over. He'd been talking to Denis in low tone about Quidditch, if Kit heard correctly.

"Sure," Eric jumped up and wrapped an arm around Kit. She waved goodbye to Denis and snuggled into him.

"I promised the guys I'd go the Zonko's and get some supplies," Kit explained as they walked down the main street. "It looks suspicious if one of us buys enough prank supplies for the whole year. We divvy up the costs in the end."

"You guys have got this down to an art," Eric remarked. Zonko's was massive and confusing to a first-timer, but Kit was a seasoned veteran and navigated the aisles with ease.

"Kit! Here to stock up, I assume." Jesse, the cashier, asked when Kit rounded the corner. He smiled at her and walked around to show her the new arrivals. "I've already shown this to Sirius when he was in, but I thought you would like it as well." Jesse pulled a box down a box and held it out to her. The label read Paul & Paul. Catching his eager gaze, she peeked in and saw two figurines of pure silver. Or, at least, they looked like figurines, but when Kit picked one up, it's eyes blinked and he jumped to stand on the counter.

"Paul!" he yelled, waving a hand at the second man, who hopped over the edge and joined his brother.

"We are Paul-"

"And Paul."

Kit peered down at them and smiled. "I got that much from the box," She shook the container at them and asked what they did.

"Anything, that's the beauty of it," Jesse interjected. One of the Paul's looked up at him disdainfully.

"Aye, we do whatever the young maiden requests." Kit realized they were all silver because they were knights in full regalia.

"They can lift up to three times their weight, pick locks, deliver packages. They're small enough that an owl can carry them but they can catch stray cats or frogs." Jesse plucked them back up and dropped them in the box. "They activate when they leave the box and don't need any care."

"Neat," Kit took the box. "How much?"

"Regularly, two galleons and seven sickles. But for you, I'll knock of the sickles." Jesse placed them on the counter with a smile. "Anything else I can get for you?"

An hour later, Kit left with two Paul & Paul's, a charmed goblet that refilled automatically, four packages of dungbombs, a new set of cards for Exploding Snap that exploded into different fireworks, and a special book of Charms Jesse had put aside for her.

"They're right up your alley," he had said with a tap on his nose. Kit laughed as she hoisted the bag higher up on her arm and grinned at Eric.

"I hope you won't use any of those on me," he said as they pushed past the crowds of people in the Three Broomsticks. They found a table near the centre and Kit dumped her bags onto the seat beside her.

"Butterbeer?" Eric asked and walked off when she nodded. The Three Broomsticks was always amazingly warm and Kit was already shedding layers. Butterbeer made everyone's insides warm, so Kit had removed her jacket, hat and gloves in anticipation.

"There you go," Eric set a mug down in front of her and took a long sip from his. "Come here," he held one arm out and allowed Kit to sidle up next to him in the booth. He wrapped one arm around her and she settle against his chest.

"I could spend the whole day like this," Kit said. Eric laughed from behind her and she felt him nod.

"Me too, provided that the drinks kept coming,"

"Oh, so you'd need to be drunk to spend a whole day with me?" Kit joked, making an absurd face at the drink.

"Not even close," Eric whispered, placing a kiss just below her ear. Kit squirmed against him which made Eric laugh.

"You're way too ticklish," To prove his point, Eric slid a hand down her waist and tickled her. She jumped and squealed, making half the heads turn in her direction.

"Stop it!"

"Make me,"

Kit grabbed his face and kissed him deeply. His hand stopped tickling her long enough to slide to her back and hold her close.

"Good enough?" she asked breathlessly a few moments later.

"Hardly," Eric whispered, his eyes smoldering. That moment was ruined by a gust of bitter cold wind and the unforgettable sound of Sirius flirting.

"Kit!" He called to her and led his date over to their table. He got drinks of him and his date and left Ana to sit with the couple. Kit sat back and sipped her drink quietly. She wasn't exactly friends with Ana, but she didn't mind being around her. It was the looks she was sending Eric that were bothering her. Feeling possessive, Kit reached up and kissed Eric again. Sirius chuckled when he came over and looked at the pair.

"Aw, look at that. Young love," Sirius held his heart and collapsed into his chair with a snicker. Ana gave a short laugh and sipped her drink. Kit sat back and fixed Sirius with a look.

"Been to Zonko's?" she asked when he began looking through her bags.

"Nope. Ana doesn't want to," Sirius shrugged but snapped his head back up with Kit began making whipping sounds at him. "Bugger off," he said with an eye roll. "You picked up a lot of stuff,"

"Yeah, like I'm sure James, Remus and Peter did as well. Remember, we all agreed to stock up and split the cost?" Kit rolled her eyes when Sirius smacked his head. "Dolt," she commented.

"C'mon, come back with me. We'll shop together?" Sirius asked. For a moment Kit wanted to say no, but she was getting tired of Ana making eyes at Eric. She finished her Butterbeer and nodded at Sirius.

"Alright,"

"What? I thought we were going to spend the day together, babe." Eric looked up at her as she rose and began pulling her gloves and hat back on.

"I'll meet you in the common room tonight, kay? I'm sure Ana would be glad to keep you company," Kit turned and left with Sirius. He looked a bit disappointed as they walked across to Zonko's.

"Don't worry, I'm sure someone else will shag you tonight," Kit said. Sirius gave a grumble, but perked up when they entered the joke shop.

"I miss this place," Sirius inhaled and smiled brightly at the familiar place.

"I can't believe you admit to liking shopping,"

"Prank shopping. Difference," Sirius pranced along the aisles, gathering things in his arms gleefully. He looked like a kid of Christmas or, more realistically, a teenager with an endless bank account. Sirius, despite his other qualities, had an amazing ability to make Kit smile.

"It's still shopping. Granted, it probably makes you seem like even more of a catch." Kit rolled her eyes and watched him ladle things into his arms. "I don't get it. How can the entire female population be in love with you when I have personally spread rumours that you wear make up, prance around in frilly underwear, are actually bald, and have an STI? I'm stumped,"

"You said I had an STI?" Strangely, he didn't seem upset about it. More like he as impressed. "Well, Kit, the only thing I can say is raw animal magnetism. Women unconsciously want a man that can provide for them. I am strong, physically attractive and good breeding material." He bent and gave her chaste kiss on the cheek. "It's in your nature,"

"Eugh!" Kit wiped her face clean and stalked after him. "No way. You're big headed-"

"Confident,"

"-annoying-"

"Persistent,"

"-cheating,"

"Imaginative." He paused to consider that one and shrugged. "Horny,"

"I'm seriously confused by women," Kit rolled her eyes skyward as they walked out of Zonko's. Sirius had easily spent twelve galleons and he didn't blink an eye. Kit's family was well off, but Sirius's was stinking rich.

"Well, I'm confused by guys in love," Sirius said as they climbed into a carriage.

"What?"

"They give up everything to be with one girl for the rest of their lives. They go all gooey-eyed around their significant other. Settle down," Sirius gave a little shudder. Kit laughed at him and shook her head.

"I mean, they pine after her, get all mopey when she's not around and act like their life's complete when she's around." He shook her head and stared out the window. "Nope, I don't get it." Kit stifled her laughter and shook with unreleased giggles.

* * *

**Hey there! Sirius has an answer to everything, doesn't he? Well, the next chapter is almost finished and I'm just editing it now. **

**The next chapter has men (boys) acting like idiots, celebrations and I have a little snippet for you. Anyavioletta did this for her story "The Good Morrow," and I liked the idea. (Great fic, btw)**

...she silenced him by grabbing his shirt and kissing him fully.

**And I'll leave you with that. I'd love to know what you think about the fic and thanks to pixiestixz for reviewing. I really appreciate it! Thanks to everyone else that put this on their alert or favourite list. Bridge and I are pumping out chapters so I hope to update really quickly.**

**Dahlia  
**


	13. Chapter 13

**This chapter contains swearing, drunken foolishness and mild sexual themes.**

**Consider yourself warned.  
**

* * *

The Great Hall was unusually loud that morning. Forks scraped against plates, goblets were slammed down, cheers echoed off the walls as Quidditch players came in. Jeers were thrown between Gryffindor and Hufflepuff. Kit sat between James and Sirius, all three of them shovelling food into their mouths. Kit's plate was stacked high with pancakes and bacon, a big bowl of fruit to one side and a massive goblet of pumpkin juice at the top of her plate. Every game she packed as much food in as she could. Rose looked at her nervously as she walked past and put a hand on her shoulder.

"Is that smart?" she asked, but James answered for her.

"Trust me, it'll end up all over the Quidditch pitch in a few minutes." He took a long glug from his goblet and gave Kit a quick smile. Regardless of how great a player she was or how often she practiced, she always got sick before a game. And instead of feeling queasy on an empty stomach and feeling sick for the who game, Kit filled up on food that morning and was able to play the game feeling better.

"Oh, Kit!" Rose only managed to fuss over her cousin for a moment before she was pushed away.

"Rose, I'm fine. I've done this before. Go wish your team luck and I'll see you in the stands." Kit smiled fleetingly at Rose as she walked away before turning back to her meal. She gave it a final look as she pushed it away.

"You sure?" Sirius asked from her other side.

"Completely. I'm full. Let's go," Kit stood and James gave the signal for the rest of the team to follow. A fanfare of cheers followed them out as they walked to the pitch. Kit changed and swung her bat around a few times. The first game of the year. The whole feeling of James as a captain rode on this game. Glancing at him, Kit noticed how nervous he was.

"Prongs, you'll be fine," Kit pushed aside any hard feelings they made have had for a moment and patted him of the back. "We'll win. You've picked a great team." James opened his mouth to say something, but saw something in Kit's face and pushed her out onto the pitch. Her feet just touched the grass before her whole breakfast came up. Her insides heaved three times before she was completely empty. James rubbed her back as she was sick and with a wave of his wand there was a glass of water in his hand.

"Here," he held it to her, but she held off for. With one hand raised, Kit gave another heave. After she was sure she was alright, she took the water and gulped it down. James filled it again and she washed her face.

"Thanks," she said as they walked back. He grinned at her quickly, his glasses dropping down his nose. Then he saw Eric coming up behind her and glared.

"You alright, babe?" Eric asked, running a hand through her hair.

"Got nervous," Kit said. James stood before the team and began his pep talk.

"This is the first game of the year; a lot rides on this. My ability as a captain, our ability as a team, Sirius ability to get girls through bragging rights," there was a ripple of laughter, including Sirius who didn't look abashed. "But this is against Hufflepuff. I've seen their team and we aren't up against much. But that doesn't mean we don't try. Diggory is someone to watch for; he'll try his hardest to screw us up. But we're good, really good this year. Let's give it our best-"

"Beat a few heads in!" Kit yelled from her spot. James chuckled and nodded.

"If we must." He led the team out and they mounted together before taking to the sky. The crowd was a sea of red and yellow. Their cheers grew when Hufflepuff flew out and the whole school watched as James and the captain shook hands. Then the quaffle was in the air and the game had begun.

"Take you Diggory first!" Sirius yelled to her once they were positioned.

"Why?"

"I don't like him!" Kit rolled her eyes at Sirius, but did aim a bludger at Amos when he came by. Kit could see Amy, their Seeker, circling up high in the air, keen eyes searching out a glint of gold. Kit scanned the crowd and saw Rose sitting on the edge of her seat between a swarm of Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs. Rose was probably having a hard time deciding who to cheer for. Smiling to herself, Kit looked down at saw James with the quaffle and Eric on his tail. They hadn't gone over that in practice. Kit flew closer to the goal posts now the the quaffle was far away from Denis.

"What are they playing at?" She asked him.

"No idea, but it'll cost us the game," Denis grunted. Apparently he wasn't too pleased by their behaviour either. Kit watched as James threw the quaffle in and celebrated his victory, only to have Eric slam into him as he flew away with the quaffle. James tackled Eric directly and sent him flying back across the field. Eric tried to keep his hold on the quaffle as James wrestled for it. Eventually, Toby, the newest Chaser, intervened and scored a goal.

"I don't know what Potter and Denning are up to, but it can't be good for their team," Marcus said as commentator. Kit groaned and whacked a bludger in his direction. James was being a prick and if he didn't smarten up soon, it would cost them the match. Kit zoomed around the pitch and held a bludger off Eric as he went after the quaffle. From across the pitch she saw Amos hovering near Rose, obviously not paying attention. Let the Hufflepuff team do what they what, Kit thought as she sent a bludger in the Hufflepuff captain's direction. But Sirius whacked a bludger so hard at Amos that he went flew across the pitch towards Kit. The two collided and Kit slammed against the stands behind her.

"Diggory!" Kit yelled and threw him off of her. He aimed a punch at her but was caught by Sirius who hit him soundly in the head with his Beater's bat.

"Padfoot!" Kit tackled him and slapped him. "You're going to cost us the game!" Sirius grumbled and muttered something about good for nothing jerks, but stopped when Amos aimed a bludger at him. Sirius doubled over and nearly toppled from his broom. What the hell was going on today? Kit flew past Amos, whacking him in the side with her bat, only to find Eric and James tackling each other to get the quaffle.

Kit caught up to James and grabbed a handful of his jersey. "Call a time out!"

"No!"

"James, do it!" James glared at her up signalled for a time out, flying down to stand with his team on the pitch. When they landed, Kit grabbed James, Eric and Sirius and ripped them to shreds.

"What the hell are you playing at? You're are the same bloody team!" She smacked James and gave Eric a push. "Seriously! And you," she spun to face Sirius, "I don't care what Amos did, but don't send him flying just because he was making eyes at my cousin. Do you know how many penalties shots they'll get because of you three alone? Pick it up and leave whatever problems you have off of the pitch, alright?" Kit snapped at the three boys. "I have never seen anyone act so immature in a game before, so smarten up or else prepare to hand the cup over to any other team since they don't fight with _each other _on the pitch!" They had the grace to look abashed once Kit was finished. Kit sucked a breath in and faced the rest of the team.

"You guys are doing really well, and if weren't for these dolts, we'd be winning." Kit nodded at them all and the team was back in the air.

"Kit," she turned to see Amy floating beside her. "Thanks for that."

"Someone's got to keep them in line," Kit shrugged and told her to keep her eye out for the snitch.

"I'm way faster than Davis, anyway," Amy winked and flew up.

The match went as well as Kit could have hoped from them on. After eight penalty shots, only three of which scored, Amy caught the snitch in record time and Gryffindor walked away the victors.

"You're all damn luck Amy such a great Seeker," Kit hissed to James and Eric when they were in the change rooms.

"We get it Kit, we acted like morons," James snapped at her.

"Damn right you acted like morons. I can't believe you!"

"Yeah, well, I can't believe you're still dating him," James muttered and turned away from her. So this was all about her dating Eric? How stupid was that! James Potter was the world's biggest prat sometimes. Kit rolled her eyes and gave an exasperated huff as she gathered her things and went over to the girls side of the room.

"You did really well today, Amy," Kit said to the young girl.

"Thanks, but I didn't do anything exceptional." Kit gawked at Amy.

"You are kidding, right? You out flew a Seventh year. It was amazing!" She clapped her on the shoulder and walked with her back to the rest of the team.

"This calls for celebration!" James announced as Amy was swept up by her brother. There was a crowd waiting for them outside and Amy was carried out by them.

"Kit!" Kit felt arms wrap around her and saw Rosie's massive hat by her head. Laughing, she returned the hug and asked if she enjoyed watching it. "Yes! Are all games so violent?"

"Trust me when I say this was tame compared to what will happen later on this year," Kit laughed off Rose's quick look of horror and instead pulled her into the common room. "For now, we celebrate!" Kit was pulled into the room by Eric, who shook a bottle of Firewhiskey at her.

"Your favourite," he joked and laughed when she took the bottle from him. Ever since that first taste of the stuff with Sirius, she'd fallen in love with it. Music was already booming from somewhere and there were students going over the game in the corners. But the Quidditch team was in the centre, the couches and tables pushed to the side, and they cheered and danced. It was the only time Professor McGonagall turned a blind eye to what they were doing. Kit took a long drink and kissed Eric as she passed the bottle back to him.

"This is the beginning of a very good season!" She shouted at him over the noise. Eric laughed and drew her close, his hand resting in the small of her back. They swayed to the music and shared the quickly emptying bottle, and Kit began to get that happy, light-headed feeling. Sirius bumped over to them and swapped their empty bottle for a fresh one.

"How'd you get all of this?" Kit could see a stash of it in one corner, easily ten bottle stacked against one another.

"Rosmerta has a soft spot for me and my parents don't notice it's missing," he took a swig from his own personal bottle and leant in. "Is everyone in? Rose?"

"Yeah, why?" she was mildly worried, but it wasn't like she could stop a tipsy Sirius when he was determined.

"I want to put a silencing spell on the room. Less trouble down the road," Sirius tapped his temple and went for the portrait. She saw him make a few attempts to cast the spell before Rose came over and did it for him. He turned to her, his easy going smile in place as he led her off somewhere. Kit shrugged and kept moving against Eric. She looked around the room and saw Remus had loosened his tie and had a drink in his hand. She'd tease him about that in the morning.

"Hey, babe," Eric whispered in her ear, his hand moving to slip beneath her shirt and to trail along her back.

"Mm-hm," Kit mumbled back as she pressed herself closer to him.

"I think we should find somewhere more private," Kit spun to look at him and shook her head.

"I have not had enough to drink to even think about that," Kit grabbed the bottle from him and went off into the crowd. Eric could spend some time alone. She danced along the people, surprised to see little Amy amongst the swarm of bodies moving to the music. Denis was a little ways off, looking grumpily at his baby sister.

"Hey! Cheer up, she's not doing anything," Kit said, coming to stand beside him. "Drink?" He shook his head and went back to looking at his sister. "Your loss," Kit took a sip and moved to stand in front of him. "Start having fun! Come on," she tugged on his hand and pulled him onto the dance floor. He looked at her incredulously as she took his hands and started dancing with him. She spun herself on his arms until he got the idea and loosened up a bit and started to dance with her. She nodded and twirled around, laughing when he did the same. She gave him a sip of her drink and left him to dance with a pretty sixth year.

Kit was doing good. She was like the party fairy, flitting around and making sure everyone was having a good time. She deserved a medal or something. Or at least another bottle of Firewhiskey. There was probably a third left in hers and it wasn't going to last very long. Kit looked over and saw James setting up glasses on a table.

"Ooh, looks like fun," she said as she approached. Her empty hand went to brace herself against the table and she saw Remus and Sirius come up and watch with drunken curiosity. "A drinking contest?" Kit burst out laughing and almost spilt her drink. "Do you know where I'm from?" she asked, only to hear Rose say exactly the same thing.

"You're all going down," Kit slurred and propped herself up to see Sirius sit down in front of Rose. James poured five shots for Sirius and Kit poured five for Rose. Kit sat back and watched as they stared each other down. Well, Rose did, Sirius was kind of glassy-eyed.

"Ready?" They nodded and Rose braced her hands on the table. "Go!" Rose and Sirius both reached for the first glass and they both downed it easily. The second went down quickly as well, as did the third. But when it came to the fourth, Sirius hesitated. James was cheering him on, shouting at him to keep drinking. Sirius threw it back and screw his eyes shut. Rose meanwhile drank her delicately and with ease. While Sirius had his eyes shut, Rose tossed back the final shot and Kit cheered.

"That's right! You can't beat a Russian at this!" Kit danced in a circle and took a celebratory gulp of Firewhiskey.

"I'll go against you," James put a hand out and waited for her focus on it and shake it. When she did, she sat down where Rose had been and put her bottle to the side. She eyed James, with his shaggy, messed up hair and his tie askew. He looked really good all of a sudden. Kit didn't have time to think about that any further because the shot had been poured and Remus had already shouted go. Kit picked up the first and tossed it back, grabbing the second before she'd finished the first. The rest went down easily mostly because Kit had a few years practice at this and she was drunk already. She slammed her glasses back down and reached for the next, finishing that one easily. But James was tied with her as she took her fourth shot, so she chucked it back along with the fifth and sixth then reached over and took his final shot. James yelled at her but she silenced him by grabbing his shirt and kissing him fully. There was Firewhiskey on her lips and she smelled like the pitch, but James held onto her over the table in an awkward embrace. She pulled back with an indulgent grin and nodded at his row of shots.

"I won," she said and giggled when he didn't reply. Behind him, Rose in his arms, Sirius's whined.

"Hey! Where's my losers kiss. If Prongs gets one, I should to," he lowered his mouth down, but Rose jumped away from him and landed on James' lap. Remus and Sirius laughed while James looked down at her, confused as to why she was there. Hadn't he just been kissing Kit?

"Rose against Kit." Someone announced and only then did Kit realize there was a small crowd around their table. The crowd cheered and soon Kit was facing Rose while ten shots were being poured. Kit felt warm and tingly, her head felt too light and her hands were eager to go against her cousin.

She looked down at the ten shots and looked up at Eric, who had poured them "Since you're such a professional," he said with a wink. She tried to check that Rose had ten as well, but kept losing track after seven. But he yelled go and a moment later, Rose was already downing her first shot.

"I wasn't ready!" Kit yelled as she grabbed her first drink. Rose was on her third as she polished off her second. Hastening to catch up, Kit took two shots as quickly as she could, hissing when it caught up with her. Across from her, Rose was slowing down, if only slightly. Kit took another and slammed her fist against the table. She took another and all but threw she shot glass down.

"Giving up?" Rose asked in slurred Russian. Kit shook her head and went for her seventh shot. People were cheering all around her to keep going and as she blinked and shut her eyes, she heard a massive roar and opened her eyes to see Rose sitting triumphantly before her.

"Aw, man," Kit slumped and stood wobbly. "Stupid Russian," she said, but was pulled up by Eric before she could say anything more. He carried her away from the crowd and the still stunned James and set her on the couch. Kit frowned up at him and felt around for her wand.

"I have a spell," she said slowly. "It makes people less drunk, or makes you drink more," she waved a hand in front of his face. "Doesn't matter," she furrowed her brow and fixed her gaze of her stomach. After a moment, she pulled up her shirt to show her bare stomach and tried to recall the right words. It did something to her so she could drink more and not get sick. It was a great trick she'd picked up from someone, but she couldn't remember who. She stumbled over the words a few times before smiling up at him triumphantly.

"Got it,"

"Good," Eric bent down to kiss her bare stomach, his hand trailing up her leg. Instead of squirming like she usually would have, Kit put a hand on the back of his neck and pulled him to her lips. Fueled by enough Firewhiskey to make her pass out, twice, Kit returned his embrace like she never had before. Eric settled against her and she lifted a leg to wrap around his waist. His hands lifted her shirt and felt her warm, soft skin. Kit smiled against his lips and pushed her hips into his. His hands moved to his belt and began to work at it sloppily. He couldn't get his fingers to work properly. A moment later the music stopped and light flooded in.

"What is the meaning of this!" A shrill voice shrieked from the portrait.

"Shit," Eric muttered and all but fell off of the couch. Kit sunk lower into the cushion in the hopes that McGonagall wouldn't see her.

"I think we're in trouble," she whispered to Eric. At least, she'd thought it had been a whisper.

"That you are, Miss Roskova," McGonagall pulled her up and looked down at her.

"What is the meaning of this?"

Kit considered her question and thought before answering, her brow creased and her eyes too wide. "I think this celebration of victory was because Gryffindor handed Hufflepuff's ass to them at the quidditch match." Kit said. She countered her slurring words by over-enunciating everything. If she did that, how would she even know she'd had anything to drink?

"Miss Ruskova!" Geez, she was really angry.

"Sorry. I think this celebration of victory was because Gryffindor handed Hufflepuff's ass to them at the quidditch match, professor." Kit said with a smile. McGonagall's nostrils flared and she looked out over the common room.

"While I am glad you were victorious, I cannot let this behaviour stand." She saw little Amy hiding behind her less-than-sober brother and took a deep breath. "Consider yourself warned," she swept another cold gaze at the lot of them before spinning on her heel and walking briskly from the teenagers. There was a moment of silence before the whole room burst into a cheer. Eric climbed back on top of her with a wicked grin.

"You're going to get it tomorrow," he chided, the effect lost when his hand danced along her curves.

"I'd rather get it now, if you please." She said, surprised when he lifted her up and carried her up the stairs.

"Tonight, I bid you adieu," Kit said to the room. There were a few sniggers in response, but Kit had already been whisked away by then. He deposited her on his bed and made quick work of her shirt and pants. Kit pulled him back and began to fumble with his belt. His head dipped to kiss her neck, moving along the familiar curve. His hands moved down and she felt her bare skin against his. She felt his settle on one spot and she moved her hands to hold his hips.

"Eric?" she ran her hands along the skin just below his navel, but got no reaction. "Eric?" she rolled over and watched him flop over onto his back. A rumbling snore came from him and Kit couldn't stop laughing. It was hysterical to the inebriated teen; every time they tried to get more physical, fate stepped in. Kit rolled off of the bed, landing with a thump before reaching out for her shirt. She pulled it on and pulled on Eric's boxers, wobbling for a moment before walking out into the hall, oblivious to the fact she wasn't wearing any pants. Her foggy mind worked through the crowd of bodies coming from each dorm until she stood before one and pushed the door open. It was quiet and empty, a thing Kit would have been thankful for if she hadn't passed out a moment later.

* * *

She was dead to the world for ten hours, in which she slept like a log in a bed she assumed was hers. She woke up slowly to a blissfully dark room; not that that stopped the pounding in her temples. Her mouth felt like it was filled with cotton when she tried to swallow. Apparently, swallowing was a very bad idea as all Kit tasted was Firewhiskey. Kit felt a wave of nausea that would have made the strongest of stomachs quiver. She must have made a sound because a moment later someone was rubbing her back as she laid on her side. Kit cracked an eye open to see James leaning over her, looking tired but better than she felt.

"You do realize you spent the whole night -morning- in bed with me, right?" He seemed a bit too gleeful about that piece of information.

"Too hungover to care." Kit groaned and turned to press her head into the pillow. She gave an audible sigh which turned into a moan when even sighing caused her head to pound. James laughed quietly and pulled the blanket closer around her. She mumbled something at him, but was asleep again before the sentence finished.

Suddenly, the door banged open and there was the sound of someone searching around frantically. "Katherine?" The clear voice rang through the aforementioned girl's head and she tried to gather the energy to chuck a pillow at her too loud cousin. Someone beat her to it, judging by the thud of impact and Rose's screech.

"Shh," someone grumbled from their bed and Kit knew it was Sirius. Out of all the Marauders, she and Sirius were the only ones who didn't use a Charm or potion to cure their hangovers. Mostly because they'd made a bet the night they'd tried Firewhiskey that they would never use magic to cure a hangover and whoever broke it first had to pay a ridiculous amount of money. Not to mention being subjected to the teasing that the winner would undoubtedly produce. Kit and Sirius had too much pride to lose this battle.

"Kit, you and Eric...?" Rose sat at the edge of James' bed and touched Kit's foot.

"No, now leave, you perky Russian." Kit gave her a kick and buried herself deeper into the sheets.

"You'll have to get up sometime, love," James told her gently. He got the same treatment and was kicked off his own bed.

"No love. And not a chance. Wake me up on Monday," she heard Sirius grunt in agreement and then heard the door shut behind James. Remus and Peter were probably still downstairs and knowing Remus, he was cleaning up.

After a moment of silence, Kit tossed a pillow at Sirius, hoping it landed in the right place. Judging by the "oomph," it did.

"Why did we make that stupid bet?" she asked, slowly working her muscles back into order. It wasn't easy and Kit was certain there was some form of vomit on her shirt, but eventually she managed to prop herself up on her elbows.

"I don't know. But I'm not losing to you,"

"Eugh, you're such a man," Kit groaned then looked down at herself. She groaned again and flopped back, her head colliding with the wall in the process. Swearing under her breath, Kit saw that she was wearing Eric's boxers instead of pants and that for the most part, last night was one foggy montage. Great, Kit thought as she shut her eyes. Wasn't that just fantastic? Now that she thought, she wasn't even sure if her answer to Rose was right. A million questions ran through her head, leaving her more confused and angry and headache-y than before. She ran a hand through her hair only to find that something had made it sticky. Moving glacially, Kit managed to get to the bathroom and shed her clothes. The scalding shower helped her head and a quick brush of her teeth managed to remove the lingering taste of vomit and Firewhiskey and removed the sweaters it felt like her teeth were wearing. She emerged feeling a bit more like Kit and donned some of James' old clothes. She snuck slowly into Eric's dorm and found him lying face down on his bed, bare as a baby from the waist down. Shit. Kit felt a wave of fever flush over her as she backed away from the snoring mass. She felt sick all over again and just managed to make it into the bathroom before emptying what was left in her stomach. That was the third time she'd been sick in one day. Kit slid down from the bowl and laid her cheek on the cool tiles. It felt really, really good. She spent the rest of the day in there, sleeping against the cold floor. She didn't come out until the sun had set and people began to complain about the fact Kit was holding up the bathroom. She stumbled down to the common room and saw that the gang was sitting by the fire, Sirius looking marginally better than he had that morning.

"Kit," James said and moved along the couch to make room for her.

"You're not off the hook yet." She warned him. "I still have no idea why I didn't have pants on." Her eyes darkened and James slipped an arm around her.

"Just having too much fun. By the way, avoid McGonagall for the next few days." Kit groaned and held her head. Things just weren't looking up. Remus leant over and put a hand on her shoulder.

"You know what really helps a hangover?" Kit and Sirius looked at him. "A big burger, dripping with grease and a side of messy onion rings..." He kept going but Kit and Sirius were running for the nearest toilet by grease bit. For a guy who was nice on the outside, Remus Lupin had a mean streak just like the rest of them.

* * *

**Oh, dear, poor Kit. She lost a drinking contest to Rosie. **

**Thanks to everyone who's put this on their favourites or alerts and a supers thanks to reviewers!  
**


	14. Chapter 14

**Warning: This chapter contains coarse language and mature themes. Viewer discretion is advised.**

* * *

It had begun as a normal break. Seriously, it had. James, Sirius, Peter, Remus, Kit and Rose had been sitting in one of the corridors since it was too cold to spend a whole hour outside. They'd been talking about the upcoming Christmas Ball; Rose was excited and everyone else was as well, but to a lesser degree. There was one every year so the appeal had lessened over the year. Kit thanked her lucky stars it wasn't formal so she didn't need to get into another dress. She'd liked the last time, not that she'd admit it out loud to any of the guys. She suspected that Rose already knew how much she'd enjoyed the experience.

Sirius had been complaining about not having a date, which earning him a boatload of looks. Then, in the middle of running through his options, he'd stopped and made a sprint for the door. Curiously, James had followed first. That turned out to be a bad idea. He'd taken a single step onto the fresh snow when something collided with his chest. Kit heard him shout and ran out after him. Two snowballs hit at the same time. It became war.

Sirius acted like a child about a lot of things, but he had the mentality of an eight year old when there was snow on the ground. Kit and James couldn't say much since they too dissolved into a state immature bliss when a snowball fight began. And as per usual, it was only a matter of time before someone played dirty. It was James who broke first and grabbed the back of Kit's jacket as he stuffed a handful of snow down it. She danced around, arms flailing around for a good while, much to amusement of everyone present. Bent of getting revenge, she got Sirius on her side and together they pinned him down and Kit shoved a snowball down his pants. It was hilarious for Rose and Kit, but not so much for the guys as they winced in pain as he howled.

"No baby Potters for him," Kit told Rose quietly. The blonde sniggered and doubled over when Kit was knocked flat on her back by James. Kit yelled and fought back but he held her tight.

"Do you remember anything about the party after the quidditch game?" he asked when she settled down a bit.

Kit stopped and turned away from him. She still didn't know if she and Eric had had sex that night and it was obvious that Eric didn't remember. She felt the same embarrassed shame colour her cheeks as she rolled out from under James.

"Kit?" he asked, a bit of laughter in his voice. They'd been joking a minute ago. He crawled over to her and shook the snow out of her hair. "Are you okay?" He looked at her from under his long fringe and pushed his glasses back up his nose. Kit ran her hands through her hair and sighed.

"Yeah," she said eventually, casting a glance at Sirius. He was her best bet for trying to figure out what happened. It would kill her to ask him, but he was her only hope. He had the most experience and she did trust him. But there was a rather large part of him that would want to do nothing but tease her for it. Ironically, it was difficult to make Sirius act seriously. She'd have to make him swear to secrecy and promise to not joke about it.

Kit was a saint compared to Sirius, even compared to James who'd had his share of girlfriends. She had an old fashioned view on sex; it was meant for someone special. It wasn't something that you just handed out like a political flyer. So the knowledge that she broke one of her most steadfast rules because she'd had too much to drink made her burn with shame. More than that even, disappointment. She liked to have fun, but not in that sense, so she was appalled. She was mostly bothered that she'd done it and she couldn't recall a damned thing about that night. Giving a frustrated groan, Kit fell back against the snow and covered her face.

"Distract me," she ordered through her mitts. James was confused for a moment before lying beside her and putting his hands behind his head.

"Remember that one Christmas when you parents forced you into a dress and you ran through the snow in it just to get out of it?" Kit laughed a little beside him and nodded.

"Didn't you do the same thing so you didn't have to wear your dress robes?"

"Guilty as charged." James conceded and said that she was probably happy the Christmas Ball wasn't formal.

"So happy." Kit said.

James shifted and looked at her as if he was considering something. "You looked good in that dress, though." He said after a moment and when Kit looked up his glasses had just slipped halfway down his nose. She smiled slowly and shook her head.

"Thanks," she tried to not think about what had happened at Slug's party but the odd tension had already crept back into the air. James shifted uncomfortably and coughed. Kit looked away and saw Sirius saunter over. He looked between the two and shook his head.

"Oh, having problems?" he asked sweetly. Kit rolled her eyes at him and accepted his hand up. She brushed her clothes off and realized her whole back was soaked. A quick look around proved that all of them were soaked and shivering. Kit grimaced and hurried back into the castle, willing herself to remember the drying Charm and the warming one that was used on their beds. Remus of course was the first to remember and soon they were dry and warm and on their way to class. Kit stopped Sirius and held him back from the rest.

"I need to talk to you," she said seriously.

"I haven't done anything to Rosie,"

"I know. This isn't about her." Kit hesitated a moment, looking at her feet before meeting his gray eyes straight on. "Please," To her surprise Sirius sobered immediately and nodded at her. He didn't act differently during Transfiguration, which Kit was grateful for. The last thing she needed was James or anyone else catching wind of her worries.

* * *

Kit was aware that time was passing but she was still shocked when she found herself sitting cross-legged across from Sirius on his bed. It was dinner and there was no one in the dorms or the common room, but they'd silenced the four-poster just to be safe. Sirius faced her and fixed her with an unwavering stormy gaze.

"All joking aside, I promise. You've never been like this," he said, noting how she was fiddling and fidgeting, how she couldn't meet his eyes. There was a moment of silence before Kit squeezed her eyes shut and put her head in her hands.

"I can't believe I'm doing this," she muttered to herself before taking a breath. "The night of the first game, we'd all been drinking. I think I'd gone through three bottles of Firewhiskey, and I can't remember much of what happened."

"Kit, get to the point."

"I left with Eric and when I wake up he's asleep with his pants off." She hissed in a breath. "Shit, I can't remember anything, Sirius. Not a damned thing."

Sirius looked over her before replying. "You think you had sex with Eric? You told Rose you hadn't." Kit rubbed her face and nodded, but paused.

"I don't know. How can I tell? Eric doesn't remember anything. And I thought I hadn't. Besides, she'd have Eric's head on a platter if I told her I did." Her voice was growing shrill with each word and she couldn't sit still.

"You're pretty worked up about this,"

"Yes, because unlike you, I have morals. Sirius, I can't...I don't know what to do."

"Why did you come to me instead of Remus. This seems more like his things. There are feelings involved here," he was a crooked smile but faltered when he saw her grimace.

"Because you've probably been every girl's first time." She tried to get the message across but when she only got a blank stare back, she hung her head. "How can I tell if I'm still a virgin?" It was probably the most awkward question she'd ever asked in her life. She couldn't even look at him after saying it.

"Never mind, this was a stupid idea," Kit got up and willed her face to stop burning. Sirius held her shoulder.

"I don't know. Honestly, Kit, I don't." He tensed when her face showed a look of utter defeat, her features crumpling. He hesitated, unsure, but she picked herself up and blinked back the stinging in her eyes.

"Okay. Thanks, but you can't tell anyone, okay?" She pleaded and made sure he knew that "anyone" meant James Potter.

"I'll take it to my grave," Sirius surprised her by giving her a quick hug. "I'm not great with the whole feelings thing, but things'll be okay." He gave her a winning smile and pulled her out and they went down to dinner. Eric hopped up to meet her when they entered and pulled her down to sit beside him. He held her close and whispered things in her ear that would have made McGonagall blush. He'd been like that since the Quidditch party, which did little to calm Kit's nerves.

"You going to the Christmas Ball?" Eric asked over his goblet. Kit poured some tea and nodded at him.

"Of course. But I'm leaving the next day. I won't be back until classes start." Kit was expected home for the family dinner and she'd been invited to some other dinner that her parents wanted her to go to.

"You'll come see me over the break, right? I'll be gone until school starts up again," Eric took her hand and ran his thumb across her palm. "Babe?"

"Yeah," Kit said distractedly. She was shocked to realize a moment later that she'd been thinking about how annoying it was when he called her 'babe.' And he had this habit of licking his lips before he kissed her. And his hair kept falling in his face which made Kit want to scream at him to just get it cut already.

Kit rose suddenly and pushed away from him to walk out of the Great Hall. He was so annoying and touchy-feely all the time. Kit whipped around the corner and walked into James on his way to dinner.

"Hi. Where are you going?"

"Eric's getting on my nerves," Kit tried to ignore the way James' face lit up when she said that. He caught her sullen look and wiped it off.

"Sorry. But you'll be on break soon. You'll get to see your family." James offered, turning with her to walk back to the common room.

"Yeah, it'll be nice to see them again."

"And you know how much _I_ love Mrs Ruskova,"

"James, don't hit on my mom; it'd make things awkward between us."

"Well and truly noted." James crossed his heart and winked down at Kit as she sunk into the couch. "Any plans while you're off?"

"New Year's party. My parents are out at someone's place for the night so I've got free reign."

"How come your parents trust you? You are easily the least trustworthy person in your family."

Kit smacked him but shrugged. "My parents grew up in really strict homes, I guess they don't want the same for me."

"Seems to me like you could use a little firm scolding,"

"Pot calling the kettle black." Kit sneered suddenly and looked at James. "Speaking of, are you going to his family dinner?"

"What dinner?"

"Me and my parents are invited and Sirius's family is going to be there, but I don't know what it's about."

"Maybe it's to celebrate Christmas?" But James knew that wasn't the case. If Sirius's parents were behind something, nothing was right. "Be careful, alright?"

"Thanks, dad," Kit rolled her eyes and smacked him with a pillow. "But we should all get together for Christmas. The whole gang since Rosie'll be at my place."

"It wouldn't be Christmas without Mrs Ruskova's famous spiced wine."

"I think she makes a whole pot just for you, you know." Kit felt herself relax and start to enjoy the idea of going home. Rose must have really been missing home if even Kit was looking forward to seeing her parents. She wondered if the Mozorovs would be at the family dinner.

* * *

The whole castle smelt of cinnamon and cloves and the halls had been lined with shimmering snowflakes that spun and twinkled as you walked past. Peeves was throwing snowballs at students in the corridor as they entered the Great Hall. Kit found herself walking past Peeves unharmed simply because she was associated with the Marauders. He even lifted his Santa hat as she walked in. Waving back at him, Kit looked out into the room and felt herself smile. The tables were gone and instead there were refreshment tables along the walls. The centre was a dance floor and there were already a score of people swaying to the music the live band was playing.

Kit thanked the Headmaster for not making this a formal event. It was more like a final celebration before people went away for two weeks. Kit had chosen a pair of jeans and a sleeveless black silk shirt that tied around her waist. Or, more appropriately, Rose had chosen it and forced her into it. Kit's personal choice was to Charm a set of muggle Christmas lights to blink on and off as she wore them as a belt. Eric had been confused at first as to why she wanted him to owl his parents asking for the muggle lights they had but loved them on her.

"As if you need more sparkle," he remarked as he led her onto the dance floor. Kit smiled at him and cast an eye out for the others. They were going to go together but Sirius's date had been taking forever and Eric had grown impatient. Surprisingly, Sirius was taking Anastasia Turner, the same girl he'd gone to Hogsmeade with. It wasn't often Sirius found himself with the same girl twice unless, of course, she was easy. Kit assumed Ana was of that kind and she immediately lost any respect she had for the fellow Gryffindor.

Kit spent most of the night with Eric, sitting with him, acting silly or pointedly trying to ignore the glares James was sending his way. Finally, having had enough, Kit stomped off and made an excuse about getting drinks. She braced her hands against the table and took a deep breath. She wasn't glaring at Lily the whole night. Of course, she was a goody two-shoes who didn't know fun if it smacked her upside the head and most likely had a mandrake rammed up her rear end, but Kit had refrained from making a scene. Why couldn't James do the same? Kit filled a glass with punch and threw it back. One of the professors looked at her with distaste but Kit turned away and looked back over the crowd.

She couldn't move as she saw James' fist pull back then land squarely on Eric's jaw. The glass in her hand dropped and shattered but Kit was already pushing through the growing crowd to the guys.

"What the hell!" She yelled as she pushed into the ring the crowd had formed. James pulled back again and punched Eric in the gut. Eric grabbed him and threw him off. A cheer went up behind her as Kit walked over and pulled James away.

"What are you doing?" He was sporting a bloody nose and there were drops of blood in his robes but Kit shook him despite his injuries. "Just beating up my boyfriend for no reason?"

"No reason?" James gave a single, humourless chuckle as he glared at Eric over Kit's head. "I have every reason to smash his head in."

"Care to enlighten me, then?"

"Yes, Eric. Care to enlighten her?" James pushed Kit roughly aside and grabbed the front of Eric's shirt. "Why don't you tell her about how you spend your nights? All warm and cosy with Ana Turner."

Eric's eyes flicked to Kit and he shook his head. "He's lying. Kit, I would never..."

"Yes you would, and you have been twice a week since school started!" James laughed and threw his hands up, rounding on Kit. "I cannot believe you gave everything to him." He gave her a pointed look and Kit felt something bubble inside her. She'd lost her virginity to someone who's been cheating on her? She grabbed Eric and pulled him down to her height.

"Tell me the truth. Eric, tell me it isn't true." He couldn't look her in the eye. Kit sucked a breath in and shut her eyes against the tears that stung them. She felt a swift, sharp pain in her chest that threatened to make her knees buckle. For the life of her, she couldn't figure out why it hurt so much, only that it did. She threw Eric away from her in disgust and tried to push her way out of the crowd.

"Move!" Kit shouted at them, her voice thick with unshed tears. She pushed and elbowed her way out until she could breathe again. The hallway was cold and empty and in the sudden silence, Kit let out a sob. She collapsed and sank to her knees. The bright, blinking lights around her waist seemed wrong all of a sudden, the cheery mood gone and replaced with a dark fury growing beneath the immense betrayal.

"Kit," someone reached down and put a hand on her shoulder. She whirled around and stood to face James. He recoiled at seeing her twisted features and stumbled when she shoved him.

"How could you?"

"How could _I_? Kit, he was the one cheating on you!"

"In the middle of the ball, in front of everyone."

"You're worried about your reputation?" James scoffed and rolled his eyes at her.

"No, James. I'm worried about the fact that half the school now knows I lost my virginity to Eric!" She gave a frustrated scream and slammed her fist against the wall. "How could you? I was happy, James. Don't you get any of that? Finally happy,"

"So, what, you've been miserable for your whole life?"

"You don't understand!" Kit turned away from him and wiped at the tears that blurred her vision. He reached out and forced her to look at him.

"Then make me,"

"I've always been one of you. One of the guys, James. Always. I was never seen as anything else." She could feel something shift and break inside of her. She didn't want to admit it, she didn't want to share any of it, but it was threatening to rush out now. It pressed against her mouth, her lungs, until it felt like she couldn't breathe. She tried to stop it, to hold her breath until the moment passed, but the pressure built until she couldn't keep it contained. With a sob, she exhaled and gave a scream.

"I was never loved, James! Not like that! I watch you and Sirius and Rose and Lily get that attention, getting the looks, the embraces. Eric was the only person who ever saw me as more than the rough mate of the Marauders.

"I pretend to be happy with the way you all just treat me like a friend when I want so much more. And now you ruin the one relationship I had and I find out that the one person I thought loved..." Kit trailed off and pulled herself away from James. "You don't get it because you get that glory. Everyone loves James Potter."

"People love you," James said.

"No they don't. There are people who hate me, there are people who blame me for things I didn't do."

"I love you." James stepped towards her, reaching for her just as she stepped away. Her eyes were red and stained with tears. But behind the glassy sheen, they were hostile. The look was clear; she didn't want to hear this now. And it had better not be a joke. "Kit...Katherine, I have been in love with you, hopelessly so, since the day we met. You have never been just a friend to me. You've been there for me-"

"James, stop."

"-my whole life. Not an hour goes by when I don't think of you-"

"Stop it, James."

"Why? Because you're afraid of what will happen if you fall in love again?" He was right, of course. And he could see it in her face. "I know you, Kit. Better than anyone. I know you're scared-"

"I'm not scared!" Kit yelled at him. "I was just told that my boyfriend cheated on me and you think this is the perfect moment to rip the final piece of normality from my life by telling me you've loved me since you were nine?" Kit backed away, shaking her head. "No. James, I won't listen. I will not have this last shred of my life before all this began taken from me. I can't." She allowed a single pleading look at him through the tears. "You know me so well, then you have to know I can't do this. Not now."

"Katherine, just listen," James grabbed her shoulder as she ran for the steps. Kit rounded on him and punched him squarely in the nose. He dropped his hand and held his nose, looking up at Kit with a mixture of anger and pity.

"Don't you dare pity me, James. I don't need it, not from you. Not when you were the one who ruined everything," Kit took a step down so she looked him in the eyes. Blood trickled from his nose, which had been broken in two places, and his glasses were shattered as they laid crookedly across the bridge of his nose. "Don't talk to me again. Don't...don't even look at me. I want _nothing_ to do with you." She whirled around and left him on the steps. As she climbed up to the highest tower, she could hear people around him. She could pick Rose's voice out, followed by Sirius's.

Sirius had lied to her. He promised he wouldn't tell a soul about Eric. Kit wiped at her eyes and pushed herself to keep walking. The temptation to just break down there on the steps was strong. She faltered twice, her feet tripping on the stones as another swift, sharper pain went through her chest. Finally, she gave up and sat on the stairs, her head cradled in her hands.

"Kitty?"

Kit groaned and pushed herself up. She didn't want to talk to anyone, especially not Rose.

"Katherine!"

"What do you want Rose? To yell at me and make me feel guilty for not telling you the truth about Eric? To tell me that you didn't like him from the start?" Kit turned to look down at Rose and saw the glimmer of tears in her blue eyes. It was like if Kit ever snapped at Rose, she cried. Kit didn't have the energy or the patience to treat Rose like a child now.

"Don't cry. For fuck's sake, don't. I don't need that too,"

"_You_ don't need it? Katherine, I know this is hard-"

"No, you don't. You have no idea, alright?"

"Do not assume you are the only one who knows pain, Katherine."

"Oh, merlin, Rose. This isn't some game of my life is shittier than yours." Kit closed her eyes and took a breath. "Just go away, Rose." Her cousin made an attempt at arguing but Kit cut her off. "For once in your life, just listen to me, please. Don't fight, just go away."

"If that is what you want," Rose said, her voice still wobbly.

"Yes, Rose. That is exactly what I want. To be left alone." Kit ground her teeth and walked away from Rose. Thankfully, she didn't encounter another soul as she made her way up to the highest point in Hogwarts. It was higher than the Astronomy tower and technically off limits. But Kit and Remus had climbed up one time in second year and Kit had loved it. The best part was no one could get up there and pass her by chance. She climbed up the ladder into the old, abandoned divination classroom and unlatched the window facing east. Climbing through that, Kit sat on the cold roof tiles and wrapped her arms around her knees. The roof was flat, so there was no threat of falling off. Not that Kit would ever consider jumping off either. She wasn't suicidal, she just needed space or time or both.

Kit looked out over the grounds, all glittery with snow, and asked what had changed. What made this year so much more different than the last. The answer was obvious and Kit blamed Rose for the way things were. If she'd just stayed back at home and sucked it up for two more years, nothing would have changed. Things would have been the same; James wouldn't have confessed any hidden feelings because, now that Kit thought about it, it was exactly like Rose to make him talk about how he felt and to push and prod him until she knew the truth. Rose should just go home and leave Kit's life to Kit. None of the guys would have interfered if Rose hadn't been there; they avoided feelings like the plague and certainly wouldn't have mucked around in her business out of simple fear of the consequences. But Rose was family and she could get away with anything since, hey, she and Kit were like sisters. Kit shook her head furiously and banged it back against the stones behind her.

Sirius had betrayed her, Eric had as well, James just about threw their friendship out the window. What did she have now? A cousin who thought she could play God, a werewolf who thought he wasn't worthy of love and Peter, who was as useful to her as the rat he became. Great. What a great hand she'd been dealt.

Happy fucking Christmas.

* * *

**Angsty, huh? Well, I've been on a writing spree which is great since I was really bad at updating my chapters for a while, but I've got quite a few finished now and I'll be posting them tonight.**

**You know I don't own Harry Potter or anything else you recognize and J.K Rowlings. I make nothing from this other than joy and warn fuzzys.**

**Dahlia  
**


	15. Chapter 15

To say Kit was on a rampage would be an understatement. The only person who wasn't on the receiving end of her wrath was Remus and even then, Kit hardly spoke to him. A single look from someone (and there were plenty) and they had buck teeth a moment later. Kit had three students in the Hospital Wing by the end of the day. Hands clenched, she rounded the corner and saw Eric standing a few feet away, his back to her. He never heard or saw her coming. One moment he was waiting to get into class, the next he was pushed up against a wall with a wand pointed at his chest.

"You. Little. PLEB!" Kit screamed and shot a curse at him from point blank. He was thrown against the wall with so much force that pieces of rock crumbled beneath his back. She was pleased to see that his nose hadn't healed yet.

"Kit, it isn't what you think,"

"Oh, you it's not that I wouldn't put out for you?" She bent to look down at him and sneered when he couldn't think of a reply. "That's what I thought. You're pathetic," she waved her wand and hoisted him up by the ankle and tossed him down that hall with another flick of her wrist. She heard him land with a thud and walked over him on her way to find James.

Apparently people knew where she was headed. Sirius caught her and tried to hold her back.

"Prongs didn't do anything wrong, Kit." He tried, but she wouldn't have any of it.

"Sod off before I hang you from the Quidditch hoops." She pushed past him and began climbing the stairs to the common room.

"Why are you so upset?" Sirius ran after her and heard her humourless chuckle.

"Why don't you ask James? In fact, tell him you want to know everything I said last night. Every last word." Kit smiled at Sirius as he passed her and fixed her with a worried stare. Kit wanted to fight and making James relive what she's said, make him drag up everything, would enrage him. He'd have to come fight her and he'd be so riled up it would be a great duel. Fuelled by the idea, Kit went through the rest of the day solely focused on remembering curses from the textbook she'd taken from the forbidden section of the library. She was so wrapped up that she didn't notice the looks the Slytherins were giving her. Looks of approval and excitement, like they'd been waiting for years for something like this to happen. She watched eagerly as she tossed Eric around and showed no mercy for his pleas and attempts at apologizing. The way she refused to speak to her blood traitor friends, her blatant lack of respect for authority or fear of the repercussions. She truly was furious.

She didn't notice them until one turned to her at dinner and said, "I knew it wasn't true. You've got potential." The girl looked at her in awe before Kit sent her fleeing with a glare. Whatever that had been about, she didn't have time to think about it because Sirius was running towards her. It was getting dark out, Kit noticed as she looked up at the enchanted ceiling.

"I can't believe you said those things," Sirius hissed at her, giving her a dark look.

"You should. They were true." She refused to look at him and instead inspected her wand, a knowing smile tugging at her lips. "Let me guess, James wants to meet on the grounds immediately."

"Yes," Sirius spat and followed her out as she calmly walked out the doors and found James pacing and fuming at the bottom of the hill. He looked up and reached for his wand but hesitated at the last moment.

"What's the matter Potter? Aren't you mad? Aren't you furious that I blamed you for everything?"

"Shut up!"

"I bet you just want to curse me into oblivion, don't you?" Kit paused and picked at a spot on her wand. "But you can't, can you? You love me too much to hurt me," Kit said mockingly, pouting at James. He swore and brandished his wand. It was only then Kit noticed Remus, Peter and Sirius flanking James.

"Don't do it, James," Remus warned, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"Yes, James. Do it."

"Prongs, this isn't Kit, she's angry, but it'll blow over." Sirius tried to pull James back, but he froze when Kit yelled at him.

"Stay out of this, Black!" She turned her eyes to him and he saw the plain fury glowing in them. He'd been right, this wasn't Kit. He'd seen her blind angry before, but this was harsher, more deadly. She truly believed that everything had changed now. It was insecurity that was making her lash out, hidden under the facade of anger and betrayal.

"James knows this won't blow over. He knows the truth because 'he knows me so well.' " Kit sneered at him and threw her arms back. "C'mon, James. I know you're just itching to throw me about, so do it already."

"Kit, you don't mean that," James tried.

"You couldn't be more wrong." Kit lifted her wand and sent a curse at him. He sent one back and soon the ground was lit up with spells. Students gathered at the windows to watch the battle. Some in awe, others in disgust, but everyone was watching. Kit was thrown back and landed flat on her back, but scrambled up to send James flying into the Forbidden Forest. They were bloody and sore, bruised and beaten by both magic and each other.

"Do you really know me James?" She screamed at him at one point. "Is this the girl you knew?" James wiped at the blood that was streaming down his temple and spit a mouthful onto the grass.

"Potter, Ruskova, my office. NOW!" They looked up to see Dumbledore outlined by the light of the Great Hall. Kit brushed a leaf from her hair and began walking up the hill calmly. Dumbeldore was fixed her with a withering look as she passed him and went into his office.

"Miss Ruskova, in the time frame of just over a day and a half, you've sent four students to the Hospital Wing, not including Mr Potter here. You've used illegal curses on Mr Dennings and have physically assaulted him numerous times." He watched as Kit nodded and looked away, but there was still an anger burning in her eyes.

"Mr Potter, you also took part in the duel despite the fact you both know it is against the rules. I understand that you have some problems that needed resolving, but not in this school. I will not tolerate this behaviour!" His blue eyes pierced through both of them and he finally released a deep sigh.

"You are both lucky tomorrow you leave for holiday. If you return and this behaviour continues, I will have no choice but to punish you for your poor choices."

"Punish?" James asked.

"Expulsion," and with a nod James was released. "Kit, stay back." Kit thought she was going to get the worst of it now and find out that she'd already been expelled. "In your sudden war path, did you not realize that your cousin was missing?"

"Where is she?" Kit asked hesitantly.

"Her parents have taken her back to Russia."

"Good riddance," Kit muttered while picking at her nails. Dumbledore gave her a serious look but dismissed her.

* * *

Kit had sat by herself on the train back to London and was met in the station by her parents. Luka and Tori Ruskova were both wrapped in each other's arms as they waited for Kit to come through the wall. Kit had inherited her height from her mother and had inherited most of her features from her, but had acquired her father's sense of adventure and talent with a wand. She'd learnt how to fight and duel from him and she'd learnt how to play quidditch from her father.

Kit couldn't wait to get back to some form of normality. She saw her parents and ran for them, nearly bowling them over.

"Katherine," Luka bent and kissed the top of her head before leading her out.

"Is James not with you?" her mother asked and got a stony silence in response. Sharing a quick look with her husband, she took Kit's hand and walked her down the street. A portkey was waiting for them in the back of an alley and in a moment, they were in front of their mansion in the countryside.

"So, kiddo, any plans?" her dad asked as she flopped down on the couch and drew her legs up to sit cross-legged on it.

"There's the dinner at the Blacks," Kit offered and shrugged.

"But I thought you were going to have a New Years party," her mom came to sit beside her and ran her hands through her short locks.

"Not really an option anymore." Sensing the direction the conversation was headed, Luka excused himself and left Tori to talk with their daughter.

"Honey, what's the matter? You seem upset," Tori didn't realize the torrent of problem that spilled from Kit's mouth at those simple words. All Tori could do was sit with her until everything was out. She rubbed circles on Kit's back and let her just talk.

"Katherine, honey, things are going to change. That's how life is, but you control how you let them affect you. This was bound to happen," Seeing her daughter's confusion, Tori smiled. "It was obvious you were much more than a friend to James lately. As for Eric, there are men in the world who are like that. It doesn't make it right and knowing that doesn't make it any easier, but it's the truth." Kit leaned against her mom and relaxed into the familiar embrace.

"You certainly inherited your father's temper." Tori mused. "And I know you're upset now, but in a few days, you'll be ready to forgive James and Sirius and Rose. Eric you may never forgive, but I think we can both agree he's not really important," Tori scrunched up her nose and managed to get a watery laugh from her daughter. "Go on, get some sleep and you'll feel better in the morning. Remember the rule in this house..."

"Never go to bed angry," Kit replied and kissed her mom goodnight. Her dad popped his head in from the office and gave her a kiss. Kit climbed the stairs and changed into bright red pyjamas and curled up on her bed.

* * *

Kit woke to the smell of eggs and bacon being fried and all but ran down the stairs to get a plate. Toby, the houself, held a plate out to her and wished her a happy Christmas.

"Thank you, Toby. How's Tonna?" Kit picked up a piece of bacon with her fingers and ate standing at the counter as she spoke. Toby had a female houself who was pregnant and expecting any day now.

"Tired, but happy, miss. We'd be happy to let the children work for your family." Toby bowed his head and smiled creakily up at her. He wasn't nasty or dim; quite the opposite, actually. He was funny and often made rather witty remarks about her friends once they were gone.

"Well, make sure they're all healthy before you do anything. Send Tonna my regards," Kit went to scoop up her eggs with a piece of toast when a fork was placed by her plate.

"A fork, miss." He pushed it at her until she took it and went back to making food once she did. "I hope your dog friend doesn't plan on staying very long this year. I believe he marked his territory last New Year's." Toby flashed a grin at her and Kit tried to look reprimanding.

"I promise I'll keep Sirius reigned in this year,"

"I thank you, miss," he said as she walked out into the dining room, plate still in her hand. Kit walked around until she found her parents sitting in the library, still wearing their pyjamas. It was a tradition to stay in you pyjamas all day on Christmas.

"Happy Christmas, dear," her mom gathered her into a hug and nodded at the pile of presents. "We were waiting for you. You father is eager to see what he got this year," Kit laughed at her dad before sitting on the floor and reaching out for a yellow-wrapped box and handing it to her father.

"Happy Christmas," she said as he unwrapped it. It was a set of gold cuff links, a gold pocket watch and a gold tipped quill, all monogrammed. Luka thanked her and handed her a gift. It was long and thin and wrapped in bright red and gold striped paper.

"Dad, you didn't!" She ripped it open to reveal a gleaming new Dashwood broomstick. It had just come out and was the fastest broom on the market. And the most indestructible.

"I figured you'd need one sooner or later." Luka chuckled and groaned with Kit launched herself at him. "Just try not to get this one destroyed,"

"I swear," Kit looked down at the polished wood and the sleek tail.

"Refreshments," Toby announced as he carried a tray of apple cider into the library. He placed a mug in front of Kit and told her there was someone waiting for her at the door. Puzzled and a bit wary, Kit rose and followed the houself into the foyer.

"Happy Christmas," Remus and Peter said, looking sheepishly at Kit as she stood before them. Kit gathered them both into a hug and tried to apologize.

"Don't want to hear it," Remus said, holding a hand up. "We'll talk about it later, but for now," he picked up a bag and held it out to her.

"Oh, guys!" Kit led them both into the library and after a quick hello, Kit pushed their presents at her friends. She asked Toby to bring two more mugs of cider and went about opening her presents. Remus had bought her a pair of bright red gloves with leather palms.

"Your old Quidditch set were pretty worn out," He said as she hugged him. Her old ones were fingerless from wear and the palm had all but fallen off.

"Moony, thanks! Now, open yours," Kit sat back and was completely distracted by the smooth feel of the leather and the warmth of the wool. When she finally looked up, Remus was looking down at his wrist. Rose had helped her pick out a gold watch for him, with a night sky depicted on the face. The hands were a line of stars and if he really looked, there was a silhouette of a wolf by three o'clock.

"Kit, this is great!" Remus gave her a hug and they both pushed their presents to Peter. Kit wondered if they'd spoken to Sirius or James. She hadn't even spoken to Rose yet. Kit looked back to the pile of gifts and saw the three boxes that hadn't been touched. Remus caught her gaze and offered a smile. He went to say something, but Peter's squeal of excitement made him stop and smile at the Marauder.

Apparently she and Remus had had similar ideas as to what Peter would want. Remus had bought him a giant box of Bertie Botts and Kit had got him a massive bag of caramel clusters.

"Wait, there aren't the ones made with cockroaches, are they? Because last year I couldn't tell the difference," He eyed them warily and cautiously took one out. With a laugh, Kit took one and popped it in her mouth. Caramel clusters were among her favourite candies and Peter had been the one to introduce them to her.

"That was the time we gave you blood lollipops and said they were cherry and acid ones and said they were lime," Kit hooted with laughter and even Peter joined in.

"I had a hole in my tongue for the whole day. I think I had a lisp for a good month after it healed." Peter stuck his tongue out again to check and sure enough there was a circle on it that was lighter pink than the rest.

"We never meant to cause permanent damage." Kit gave him a little push and went about opening his gift to her. It felt like a book and Kit almost went to tell Peter he was out of his mind if he thought she would read a book over the break. But when she saw the cover she immediately flicked it open.

"What is it?" Her mother asked, trying to peered at it as Kit eagerly scanned the pages.

"_Fortenberry's Guide to Charms and Jinxes." _Peter said and hoped her parents weren't upset.

"Fortenberry is like a god when it comes to dueling," Kit pointed out. "Listen to this: By last count, Max Fortenberry dueled four hundred and fifty-seven wizards and witches and lost only twice in his whole life. He admits that the great Wizard Albus Dumbledore beat him soundly after a duel that went on for two hours." Kit sighed and looked down at the picture of Max Fortenberry dreamily. He was a good-looking young wizard who was almost unequalled in the dueling world. "What I would give to marry him,"

"Ew," Peter made gagging sounds until Kit hit him with the book.

"I gave her a weapon too, great," he rubbed his arm and stuck his tongue out at her. Kit responded by doing exactly the same thing, which made Remus mutter something about the level of maturity.

"She gets it from her father," Tori told Remus as she stood.

"Wait, where are you going?" Kit followed her into the kitchen and hopped up on the counter when it became obvious that her mother wanted to talk.

"Katherine, I think you should consider inviting James and Sirius over. You always spend Christmas with them. Besides," she turned to look at the roast in the oven and spoke with her back to her daughter. "If he really is in love with you, he'll only try harder if you ignore him."

"He hasn't tried anything save from confessing he loves me at the most inopportune times."

"Then imagine what he'll be like if he has to try harder. Especially if you're single now," there was a threat somewhere in there, Kit knew it. She sighed and hung her head. Now her mother was pushing her to date James.

"Mom, I've just been told that Eric cheated on me. Now doesn't seem like the right time to start thinking about dating someone else."

"But you and James are so perfect together. Besides, you won't be young forever. You need to start thinking about these things,"

"Mom!"

"It's the truth, Kit."

"Eugh! You sound like auntie Sonya and Uncle Misha. They spend every Christmas break trying to set Rosie up with some boy."

"What can I say? Old habits die hard, dear. You're both pureblooded, this is how life works." Her mother looked away, something flashing across her face, but Kit didn't notice as she was too busy spooning stuffing into her mouth.

"Katherine!" Her mother whisked the spoon away and gave Kit a smack on the arm. "Can you not wait until dinner?"

"Mom, you know my relationship with stuffing." Kit easily ate a plate of stuffing every day of the Christmas break. The houselves made a separate dish of it just for her, made with cranberries and lots of herbs. Kit pouted at her mom and she was pushed out of the kitchen and joined Remus and Peter in the library. Her father was gone and had wisely left the room to the teenagers. Remus already had his nose in one of the books as he always did when he visited her house.

"You wanted to talk?" she asked Remus as she folded her legs under her and took a long drink of apple cider.

Remus sat opposite her and Peter sat hear him. Remus looked at his folded hands and tried to pick the right words. "I've spoken to James,"

"Figured that,"

"And he feels awful. Really, Kit, he does. But he's telling the truth. He loves you,"

"Remus, I can't. Not now. I'm seriously hurt by what happened." Kit felt odd saying such things to Remus and Peter, but they to be said since they were the go between for her and James. Remus nodded at her.

"He knows that. So he's going to back off," Kit eyed his suspiciously until Remus finally broke and gave a chuckle. "Okay, so James never backs off, but he will for the rest of the break. He really doesn't want to get expelled." Kit smiled at him and nodded.

"Me neither. If you're going to visit him, could you take this to him?" Kit held out a box to Remus that had James written across the top in her sharp writing. "I got it before we started fighting, so..." She handed it to Remus and told them they could stay for the rest of the day, but they said they'd promised to go visit family and spend Christmas day with their parents.

"That's fine," Kit said and led them to the door. "Have any of you heard from Rose?"

"Not a word," Peter said as he pulled his hat on. Kit frowned and looked up to the owl perch by their house for Magus.

"I guess she's busy or something," Or she doesn't want to talk to me, Kit thought as she hugged Remus and Peter away. She watched them walk down the road to James' house. She sighed and closed the door, resting her head against the wood.

"Honey?" Her mom called and Kit turned to see her all dressed up to go out.

"What are you doing?"

"We have to go shopping, remember? The Blacks dinner party. You can't go in jeans and a t-shirt. We need to get you a dress," Tori smiled at her daughter and pushed her up the stairs. Kit groaned and tried to resist, but it was really no use.

* * *

**I know this is a bit shorter than the previous ones, but trust me when I say the next chapter will make up for it. Chapter 16 has been my favourite to write, by a long shot. **

**Dahlia  
**


	16. Chapter 16

Kit didn't necessarily hate shopping. It was more like she had to be in the mood for it. And she certainly wasn't in the mood for it now. First of all, it broke years of tradition of staying in p.j.s all day . Now she was walking around in a blouse and jeans (which she'd fought to wear; she was supposed to be wearing a skirt), shopping for a dress for the dinner Sirius's family was holding the next day. She flicked through racks without seeing anything until her mother had had enough and took her to a store where all she had to do was stand while a witch took her measurements and found dresses that she thought would look nice. Kit sat in the plush leather seat and couldn't help but think that it was nothing compared to the one in the Gryffindor common room. She mother laden with easily twenty dresses.

"Mom, please," Kit tried as she was pushed into a dressing room with the first one. And so began the beginning of the never ending shopping trip. Kit was squeezed and slid into dress after dress only to have them turned down a moment later.

"I can't imagine what you'll be like on me wedding day," Kit muttered as yet another dress was rejected. It was really itchy, so she wasn't complaining about that. She tried on another dress, a deep blood red in colour with a low cut back and a long skirt. There wasn't anything itchy on it since it was made of pure silk. It looked conservative from the front, with a high neck and simple straps, but revealed all of Kit's back down to the small of her back.

"Eet iz parfait!" the french sales girl said and made Kit twirl. Kit did so then clambered off of the pedestal.

"One rule. No heels," she warned her mother who went about telling the girl it had to be shortened.

"Not a problem," she waved her wand and it was altered to sit perfectly on the floor with just a pair of simple flats.

"Perfect, we'll take it!" Tori looked overjoyed at the purchase and pushed her daughter out of the store, who was happy for a completely different reason.

"Good, we can go home now," Kit took off in the direction of the nearest fireplace, but her mother stopped her.

"Not yet. We have to get jewelry and make up. Not to mention the shoes." Tori put an arm around Kit and hugged her close. "Kit, you are making this worse than it has to be. Just try and enjoy yourself, please?" Tori looked at her daughter with her big eyes and frowned at her so absurdly that Kit couldn't help but laugh.

"Oh, alright," Kit linked her arm with her mother's and made an honest effort to enjoy herself.

"Any idea what this is about?" she asked while they were looking at jewelry. Tori shrugged as she inspected a lovely diamond ring.

"Not a clue. I suppose Walburga wants to extend her reach," Tori put the ring back and went to look at necklaces. "Kit, what do you think of this?" Her mother asked for a long gold chain with a twinkling diamond pendant at the end. She held it up and slipped it over Kit's head. The charm hung just below her chest and seemed entirely took long for the dress. But Tori grinned and turned it around so it would hang off of Kit's back and settle in the middle of her back. Kit learned to trust her mother's ideas when it came to fashion and she stood back as it was put on the counter and Tori went about finding other pieces. She bought a pair of earrings and a single bracelet before leading Kit from the store and steering her towards the shoes. Kit groaned but went about trying on shoes.

"Kit, it would look much better if you wore heels with it," Tori said after they'd spent an hour in the store and still hasn't found anything.

"No heels," Kit said for the tenth time.

"Kit, you would love even more lovely," Tori held a pair out to her and gave her a sweet smile.

"You and Rose with your high heels," Kit muttered as she pulled them out and inspected them. They were black and had a low heel compared to her mother's standards. She put them on and walked around the room with more grace than she would have thought.

"Admit it," Tori said as she watched her daughter. Kit snapped her lips shut and pretended to lock them shut. "Say it,"

"Never!" Kit smirked and sat down to take the shoes off.

"Say it, or I'll make you wear those for the rest of the day,"

"Fine! You were right,"

"And..."

"And they don't hurt as much as I thought they would. Happy?"

"Very," Tori planted a kiss on the top of Kit's head and they made a final stop at a make up store when the woman spent over an hour fiddling with different colours and styles. At last, she picked a bunch of products, many of which Kit had never used before, and bundled them up for Tori. A piece of parchment was handed to them that was charmed to go through the whole look step by step. Tori thanked the woman and paid her and finally they were heading home.

"Go get ready!" Tori said when Kit went to flop onto the couch.

"What? It's three o'clock,"

"And the dinner starts at five. Get going," Kit pushed herself up and went to the bathroom, where scented soaps had been laid out for her by one of the houselves. She showered and lathered herself in lotion since it was sitting in the middle of the vanity. She stepped into her room to find that everything had been laid out on her bed, from undergarments to the make up and Tonna was standing at the edge of the bed.

"You shouldn't be doing this," Kit said as the pregnant elf went about getting things ready.

"I asked to do this, miss. It's been so long since you've been dressed up." Tonna had been a houself with her family since Kit was born so she'd been through everything with her.

"Oh, alright," Kit grumbled a little bit and Tonna hopped up on a ladder to fix her hair. Houselves had their own type of magic that needed no wand and was very effective for everyday chores. Tonna looked at Kit before snapping her fingers and trying out different styles.

"I miss you long hair, miss," Tonna said as she tucked a strand into place.

"I don't," Kit said with a snort. She'd cut it all off in fourth year when a chunk of it had been burned off by a prank gone wrong. She'd kept it short since then. Way less hassle.

"I supposed you wouldn't. You hated getting your hair done."

"I used to sit in this chair for an hour while you braided it." Kit shifted now, even though she'd only been sitting for a few minutes.

"And if you keep fidgeting, you'll be stuck here all night." Tonna took her arm and pointed at the very lacy black thing on the bed. "I take it you can put that on yourself." Tonna smiled up at Kit and watched her frown at it.

"Yeah, but where's the rest?" When there wasn't a response, Kit rolled her eyes. Of course.

"The dress _is_ backless, miss."

"I know, I know," Kit slipped them on under her towel and stood still as Tonna climbed on the bed to slip the dress over her head. It pooled around her ankles but would just float above the floor once Kit put the shoes on. Tonna sat her down on the bed and got the make up out. She scoffed at the step by step instructions and instead snapped her fingers after studying the picture and sat back to look at Kit.

"Beautiful. We're almost done," Tonna slid Kit's feet into the shoes and put all the jewelry on, taking time to get the backwards necklace to hang properly. Before she was dismissed, she spritzed a bit on perfume at Kit then walked out with a laborious bow.

"Tonna?"

"Yes, miss,"

"Take it easy, and good luck." Kit smiled as Tonna held her bulging stomach.

"Thank you, miss."

Kit let the door shut and took a moment to look at herself in the mirror. She didn't feel or look like herself. There was too much make up and the dress was far more Rose's style than Kit's. She didn't look bad; quite the opposite but Kit didn't feel comfortable in the least.

"Honey!" Luka called down for her and frowned at her as she walked down the stairs.

"No. You are going back upstairs and changing." He said after one look at the back of her dress.

"Thank god," Kit turned to go back up but her mother's voice stopped her.

"She'll do no such thing, Luka. You look lovely, dear." Tori was dressed in a black dress and her father was dressed in elegant green dress robes. Tori put a hand on her husband's arm to calm him and led the family to the fireplace.

"Black Manor," Luka said with a final helpless look at his daughter. They stepped out to a congregation of the Black family. Or most of them, Kit noticed. There were a few that had already graduated from Hogwarts, along with Regulus, Sirius and a few aunts and uncles. She tried to refrain from sneering when she saw Bellatrix. She was confused by the group, since her family appeared to be the only guests that weren't on the Black family tree. But before Kit could say anything, Walburga was welcoming them and introducing the family.

"These are, as I'm sure you know, the Ruskovas." Walburga bowed her head in respect to Luka who did the same coldly. She smack Sirius when he greeted the family with a "Hey, what's up?" Kit caught the sharp look in his mother's eye and went to stand by him.

"What's going on?" she whispered as they were lead into the dining room.

"Not a clue," and that was the last thing she could say to him. He was seated directly across from her but the table was too wide for them to talk without being over heard. Kit stood behind her seat and waited for the Black family to sit before she did the same. Kit was seated beside one of Sirius's uncles who kept commenting on how wonderful she looked.

"Don't you think so, Sirius?" he asked loudly and to Kit's surprise the whole table stopped to listen.

"She looks lovely," Sirius said after a moment. He looked at her and flicked a hair out of his eye. Smiling charmingly, he commented on the colour of the dress.

"Very beautiful and rather fitting," he grin broadened when Bellatrix sneered at Kit from across the table. Kit didn't know what sort of weird relationship Sirius had with his cousin, but Bellatrix was beyond creeping when it came to Sirius's choice in friends and shags. "Don't you think that colour looks great on Katherine, Bella?"

Bellatrix glared at the guest again before smiling sweetly. "I think it's a beautiful colour. But, of course, she couldn't pull off green." Bella fixed the way her emerald green skirt hung and batted her eyes at Kit.

_Yeah, because you look so great, you zit,_ Kit thought but held back from saying it. "I'd never want to wear green. It makes people look sickly, dear." Kit leant over and placed a comforting hand over Bellatrix's. She huffed and swiped it away, forcing Sirius to stifle his laughter into his napkin. Kit grinned at him and winked to let him know he wasn't going about this alone.

"Regulus, how is the nose?" she asked Sirius's brother over the soup course.

"Fully healed now. I thank you for the concern," he smirked at her as she swallowed a mouthful of broth. His look as he watched her raise the spoon to her mouth made her gag ever so slightly. She clamped her lips shut and looked away, catching Sirius's eye as she did. He looked furious if his white-knuckled grip on his spoon was anything to go by. Kit noticed that his hair was longer now which was never a good sign. She put her foot out under the table and tapped his leg. He focused on her and she smiled at him. He relaxed the tiniest bit and tapped her leg back. The conversation had turned elsewhere and left Sirius and Kit a moment to finally talk to each other.

"I'm sorry about this," Sirius said but Kit shook her head.

"You were forced here just as much as I was." She said and since she could reach out and comfort him, she nudged him with her foot. "It'll be over soon. Besides, you've got me here until it is,"

"Thanks," he said sincerely but then he grinned at her in that signature cocky way and Kit raised her eyebrows at him. "I must say you look devastatingly beautiful tonight." Kit father was sitting near enough to Sirius to have heard to comment and catch the roguish grin. He gave the young man a stony look which Sirius didn't even notice.

"Watch it, Pads. I might think you've begun to fancy me." Kit quirked a brow up as reached for her goblet of wine.

"Not my type, love,"

"Right, you prefer girls who have no standards. How could I have forgotten?" Kit shook her head at him and was delighted to see him laugh. The familiar banter was a nice break from the stiff and formal conversation that had dominated the night. They chatted quietly with each other until dessert was served. A decadent plate of chocolates and mousses and other assorted sweets was placed before each guest, along with a side plate of fruits.

"Katherine, are you sure you should be eating that?" Bellatrix sneered as Kit picked up the darkest and thickest chocolate mousse. She gave Kit's body a pointed look and looked smug.

"Quite sure. See, I actually play sports so I don't inflate from looking at a sweet. Unlike some," Kit gave Bellatrix an equally pointed look, but smiled before popping the sweet into her mouth. Sirius actually choked on his dessert upon seeing Bella's face. Eyes watering, he reached for his wine and gulped it down.

"Don't be a pig, Sirius," Bella snapped at him.

"I'm not the one you should be worried about," Sirius wheezed between gulps. Kit coughed to cover up her own fit and couldn't meet Sirius's eye when she finally settled down out of fear they'd start up again. Thankfully, they were forced to act like mature adults when Walburga stood and made an announcement.

"I'm sure you've been wondering why we've held this dinner," she began in her raspy voice. Everyone at the table perked up and listened intently. Kit had thought that she'd held it simply because she'd loved her family and wanted to spend time with them. Her family had obviously been invited to make Sirius feel more comfortable. Obviously. Kit rolled her eyes and looked at the female head of the Black family.

"We have an engagement in the family." Kit looked around and expected to find Bellatrix looking gleeful or Regulus looking proud but was met with the same confused looks. Oh, dear god. "My..." she struggled to get the word out, "son Sirius will be marrying Katherine Ruskova this summer."

"WHAT!" Kit and Sirius both stood and yelled at the same time. They looked at each other then back to Walburga who was glaring at her son.

"Being with the Ruskovas with teach you some respect. Maybe they will make you see sense."

"See sense about what?" Kit asked. Behind her Regulus stood and put a hand on her shoulder. She spun to glare at him and saw his sweet smile.

"She doesn't know. That's sweet." He held her shoulders and bent to look her in the eye. "You parents are highly ranked Death Eaters. You're going to marry my idiot brother and make him finally see how this world is supposed to work." he spoke to her like she was a dim-witted child. She smacked his hands off of her and fixed him with an icy look. "There it is. You've always had a dark streak in you, dear. Especially last week," he whistled and held her cheek. "We've never been so proud of you."

"No, you're absolutely wrong." She shook her head, but all she could see was him still smiling at her. All the looks from the Slytherins, Malfoy's sudden attachment, it all made sense.

"But I'm right, aren't I? You've always known about it. You feel the same way about mudbloods. Look at the way you treat Lily Evans. It's inside of you, Kit." He opened his mouth to say something else but Sirius vaulted the table and tackled him to the ground. Kit drew her wand, her hand shaking from anger when people began to move.

"Don't even think about it." Her eyes went dark and despite disagreeing with Regulus, she was doing exactly what he'd said. Beside her, Sirius was wailing on Regulus and Kit chuckled once when she heard his nose break yet again. She kicked Sirius with the tip of her shoes and when he didn't move and bent and dragged him up.

"Shut up," she told him before he even opened his mouth. She pushed him to the door. "Go back to my place. You," she turned on Walburga and took a menacing step towards her. But in all her attempts to make her squirm and look afraid, she just looked pleased. They all did with the exception of her parents, who looked afraid and disgusted.

"You're wrong, you hear me?"

"Get away from her!" Bellatrix shouted and aimed a spell at Kit. Kit deflected it and sent one right back. It was nasty and a particular favourite from Peter's Christmas present from her. Another one flew past her head and Sirius came to stand beside her. Suddenly everyone had their wands out and there was an all out fight going on in the dining room at the Black Manor. Kit focused on Regulus and Bellatrix because she hated them the most. She deformed Bella's face with one spell, making her forehead swell to the size of a watermelon. Regulus was already in bad shape from his fight with Sirius and it took one jinx to leave him unconscious on the floor. Kit heard Walburga spew awful things about Sirius as he attacked his own family. Sirius heard them too, judging by the way his whole back tensed. Kit ran at Walburga and sent her flying into the wall. The Black family was astounded that two teenagers could pick off so many experienced fighters so easily. It made Kit all that more powerful in their eyes and the news of her power would not go unnoticed by the Dark Lord. Kit's parents fought back as well and soon they, Kit and Sirius were the only ones standing.

"You think this will go unpunished?" Walburga hissed from where she was lying on the ground. "The Dark Lord will hear of this, Luka. Mark my words. You will pay. That precious little whore of yours will pay for what she did." Walburga raised a bony finger to point at Kit. "You'll be with us one day. You'll fix my traitor of a son, the blood traitor. Change him, Katherine, make him see. Fix him because you can. And you will because you like power, you crave it-" Kit silenced her with a flick of her wrist and stood above her.

"Don't think for a moment you know me." Kit stepped on her as she walked out into the foyer, grabbing Sirius by his shirt as she did. She stepped into the fireplace and yelled out the name of her house. She and Sirius stood alone in the foyer for a moment.

"Kit, I had no idea."

"I know you didn't. Just go to James' house." Kit pointed to the door but Sirius stayed resolutely in front of her. "What?" He pulled her into a hug and held her close.

"What's this for?" Kit asked, her patience wearing thin.

"For standing up for me back there,"

"But James-"

"I've never had James over." He pulled away and looked sheepish for the first time since she'd known him. "No one knows what it's like. Thanks," Kit patted his shoulder and tried to smile at him. "I know you've got a lot to deal with right now, so I'll stay out of your hair until things have smoothed over." Sirius reached out and kissed her temple before running for the door. Kit's parents arrived not a moment later and she rounded on them before they'd wiped the dust from their clothes.

"Death Eaters! How could you! You preach about equality and you work at the Ministry, for Merlin's sake!" Kit cried at her mother. "You've lied this whole time? You're just like Walburga, just like the others but you're too afraid to tell your only daughter the truth!" Kit shouted at them, furious that they'd kept something so important from her. It was like life kept screwing with her; every time she thought things would settle out some new shit hit the fan.

"Katherine Lynette Ruskova, do not speak like that to your mother." Luka's voice boomed through the foyer and he strode forward to his daughter. "Don't assume you know the whole story. If you can calm down enough to hear it through, we would like to clear the record." He walked past her into the sitting room and Tori followed him and left Kit alone until she was ready. Kit slumped against a wall and forced her breathing to slow. There had to be a reason, there _had_ to be. She wiped her face and pushed her hair back before kicking off her heels and padding over to the sitting room. Her parents were sitting on the couch and Luka nodded to the armchair opposite.

"The whole story," Kit said and drew her legs up to her chest.

"I assume you know who the Dark Lord is," when Kit nodded Luka continued. "Well, when he was still a young boy and just beginning to change from Tom Riddle to the Dark Lord, my grandfather joined his ranks. He had the same beliefs as the Dark Lord did since he was of pure blood. Because he was one of the first and one of the most dedicated members of the Death Eaters, he received a high ranking. He was revered and feared for the things he had done. He raised his sons to have the same views and brought them into the society. His sons taught their sons the same way. And they all followed without question." Luka smiled faintly. "Except my brother and I. Half brother, really, but we were raised in the same house. Our father took us to Death Eater meetings when we were young enough to be impressionable but older enough to be useful. Misha and I were the first ones to go against the family tradition, but we couldn't leave his reign until our parents were no longer our guardians.

"Do you know what Occlumency is?"

"Being able to read someone's thoughts?"

"Right. The Dark Lord is very skilled at Occlumency and therefore knew about Misha and my true feelings about what he was doing. He wasn't pleased. Misha and I were punished for our choices as young men. You were too young to remember, dear. But Misha and I had to keep going."

"Why?" Kit was surprised to see a flash of horror cross her father's face but it was gone a moment later and Kit tried to pretend that she'd imagined it.

"They threatened to hurt you and Rose. And before that, they threatened our wives. We could take the punishment or it would be given to our daughters instead." The sudden darkness in his voice and the way his hand gripped her mother's made Kit shudder. She didn't want to know what the punishment was. "We fled to England in the hopes of getting away. Misha stayed and hoped he could tough it all out. He was afraid of what would happen if the Dark Lord ever caught up with him." Luka sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"I don't know if this sudden proposal between you and Sirius was set up by the Dark Lord to get you closer to his followers or it was just Walburga trying to do him a favour to get closer to him." Kit could tell where this was headed and stood up suddenly.

"You cannot stop me from being friends with Sirius!"

"Kit, his family is trouble,"

"That's where everyone makes the mistake. He is nothing like his family. Nothing!"

"It's dangerous, Katherine,"

"I don't care! He's been there for me, I won't leave him because you're too ignorant to see he's more than just his family name."

"Katherine," Luka said in warning.

"No, dad. I won't abandon him. I can't. As you very well witnessed, I can take care of myself."

"This is a lot to take in, but I want to you be safe-"

"Coddling me isn't going to keep me safe. Leaving Sirius to the mercy of his fucked family isn't going to keep him safe either!"

"I don't give a damn about Sirius! Katherine, you are in danger, I will not lose you!" Luka grabbed her and tried to make her understand the severity of what had happened. "Walburga will let him know about what you did, how powerful you are. You are not safe."

"Then none of my friends are either and I won't leave them to die." Kit wretched herself away and went for the front door. She ran out without grabbing a coat or shoes and sprinted to James' house.

"Sirius! James! Sirius!" She shouted through the door, smacking her palms against the door until it stung.

"Kit, what's wrong?" James pulled the door open, but Sirius grabbed her first and pulled her inside. Kit clung to him like he was her life line and told him what had happened. James watched them, a jealousy burning at the sight of how Kit held Sirius close and how he cradled her. She was whispering to him, telling him things James would probably never know. James stomped up the stairs and slammed his door shut.

Sirius led her to the couch and set her down. "Kit, I'm so sorry,"

"I'm scared, Sirius. For the first time in a long time I'm scared. For my dad, for you guys, for my own life." She buried her head in his shoulder and forced any useless tears away.

"We won't let anything happen to you. I promise." He ran his hand up and down her back and rocked her very gently.

"You can't tell the guys. I'm serious, if they knew everyone would get overprotective and then they'd risk their own lives for me. I can't have that."

"You don't always have to be the hero, Kit."

"But I do. I have to be there." Kit sighed and refused to explain any further. It was too many emotional problems for Sirius to deal with in one night.

"Finished yet?" A very sore looking James asked, looking at them from the bottom of the stairs.

"James, listen. I'm sorry, it's just that Sirius knew the circumstances."

"And I never will, will I?" he asked.

"Probably not," Kit admitted and got up to hug him. "I'm sorry,"

"Me, too." James said into her hair. He held her back for a moment look down at her dress. "Why are you all dressed up?"

Kit looked over at Sirius with a smile and turned back to James, her eyes alight with mischief. "Don't you know? Sirius and I got engaged tonight,"

James passed out in her arms.

* * *

**Ta-da! Poor James. And poor Kit. And this is where the plot thickens. **

**A big thanks to pixiestixz who has faithfully reviewed. Thank you so much!**

**Dahlia  
**


	17. Chapter 17

The days that followed had been uneventful compared to the night Sirius and Kit had dubbed, "The Blackest of Nights." Kit still tried to wrap her head around the idea that her father was a Death Eater. He'd shown her his Dark Mark and she still couldn't believe it, even if he was only one because he was being forced to be. Luka never missed a chance to tell Kit that she was in danger, and Kit never missed a chance to tell him that she was well prepared. During the break she never ventured further than the Potter's home down the street.

After that night, Kit pushed aside all her fears and worries to only ever think about them when she was alone. She never admitted she was scared to anyone but Sirius and never told a soul what had happened. Of course, everyone now knew that Sirius and Kit were engaged. Sirius had even gone out and bought a cheap ring with a fake diamond in it as a joke. Turning the whole night into a joke made it easier for Sirius and Kit to move on and forget what else had happened that night. Rose was the only person who wasn't in on the joke.

Kit woke to the sound of someone stumbling around downstairs. Well, she hadn't been woken, per say. She hadn't even gone to sleep yet, but her parents were dead to the world down the hall. Kit grabbed her wand and slid from her room. She was silently grateful for the number of times she and Rose used to sneak around the house. Her feet ghosted across the floor and down the stairs. She saw someone walk around in her foyer, pacing along the longest wall. It wasn't until the figure turned and Kit caught a glimpse of golden hair in the moonlight did she know who it was.

"Rose, it's the middle of the night," Kit ran down the last steps and went over to her cousin. "What are you doing here? I thought they'd taken you back to Russia,"

Rose nodded and Kit noticed the tears. "Shit, what happened? Are Misha and Sonya okay?" That seemed to set her off even more and her hands began to tremble. "C'mon." Kit pulled her into the kitchen and sat her down at the table. What did Rose find out? If was anything like what her parents had told her a few nights ago, her reaction would be reasonable. Kit still had a hard time believing that her family had standing amongst the Death eaters. It explained a lot about what had happened at school and why Lucius Malfoy had taken a shining to her, but that didn't make it any easier to accept.

"What happened?" Kit put a mug of tea in front of her and a bottle of firewhiskey within reach. Better safe than sorry.

"Father kept leaving at night and coming back beaten and bruised. I do not know why, but one night he comes home in very bad shape." New tears came to her eyes and Kit guessed she was remembering what her father looked like. "I ask and they say something about Dark Lords and betrayers."

Kit blanched and reached for the alcohol. This was worse than she thought. She swore fluently for a minute and took a sip of firewhiskey. Misha was just like her father, then. Kit held her head and tried to think this through. There was no way she could tell Rose the extent of it. Not a chance. If Rose knew how much danger she and Kit were in, things would never be right again. If she even knew Kit was in remote danger, she'd follow her every where to make sure she was safe. No, Rose would get the gist of it but not the whole story.

"Kit? Do you know this 'Dark Lord?' " Rose asked after taking a shaky sip of tea.

Kit nodded slowly and looked up the stairs to where her parents' room was. It wasn't her secret to tell, but Rose needed to know. "Rose, the Dark Lord is a very powerful, very dark wizard. He believes in pureblood supremacy and wants to get rid of 'blood traitors.' It's a load of bull, but he has followers. They're called Death Eaters. Our family has a lot of standing within the Death Eaters." Rose looked askance at her and Kit tried to explain it better.

"See, our great-grandfather had the same beliefs as the Dark Lord and was one of the first to join the young Dark Lord when he began gaining followers. Our fathers were the first in the whole family to go against the idea of pureblood supremacy. But they couldn't make that decision or put it into action until they were legally adults. So, the Dark lord knew about their true feelings for a very long time. They tried to leave his ranks, but, as you know now, can't. What's happening to Misha is a punishment. I found out a few days ago my father was doing the same thing." Kit paused and shook her head. "They thought that moving to England and starting a new life would help. That's why I moved, Rose. It was getting too hard to keep resisting the Dark Lord, so we moved. Your parents tried to stick through it," Kit took another drink of firewhiskey and sighed.

"He's been gaining more power and wants our family back. He thinks the easiest way to get them back is to beat the standards into them," Kit sighed and rubbed a hand over her face when Rose gave a little sob. "Sorry," she mumbled. "The point is there isn't anywhere safe for us right now. He's tracking us, he knows where we are and now he knows how our parents feel about him."

"Why don't they just leave?" Rose asked shakily.

"You can't just 'leave' the Dark Lord. There are repercussions, awful ones. Besides," Kit face turned bitter, "he's threatening them with us." So much for keeping the danger thing a secret.

"What?"

"Malfoy, Regulus, Combes, they're all sons of Death Eaters. The Dark lord is threatening to have us killed if they think of leaving. So they're forced to stay and be punished." Kit slammed her hand down, making Rose jump. She pushed away from the table and went to look out the large window that overlooked the river. Now her father was going to get even worse because she couldn't marry Sirius. Bitterly, she wondered if the Dark Lord even cared or if Walburga would look to it herself to make sure Luka was punished for her refusal. She put her head against the cold glass and wished for her friends to be here. She wanted to hear Remus say something clever and that would solve all her problems. She wanted Sirius there so she could tell him his family was fucked up. She wanted Peter to be there so she could have someone to lean on who wouldn't say anything. She even wanted James there, if only to hear him make the promise that he'd fix everything and that Voldemort wouldn't get anywhere near her or Rose.

"There's a spare room upstairs, Rose. You can put your things there." Kit told her cousin, looking at her reflection in the window.

"What do we do, Kit?" Rose asked. Kit could tell, feel, that Rose was grateful Kit was holding it together for the both of them. There had to be someone who was the emotional rock and it was Kit.

"We can't do anything, Rose. Not yet. But we get ready, we prepare and the minute I graduate, I'm going to find the Dark Lord and kill him myself." Kit spoke with such clarity, such conviction that it made Rose shiver. There wasn't a doubt in her mind that Kit would stay true to her word.

"Go to sleep. You can talk to my parents tomorrow about all of this."

"What about you?"

"I'm not tired." Kit refused to take her eyes off of the dark landscape before her but she heard Rose leave with a sigh. Kit waited to hear her door close before she pulled her jacket on, checked her wand was there and went out onto the road. It wasn't a long walk to the Potter's house, but in the dead of night with the wind whipping at her face, it felt like forever before she was standing on the familiar door step. She knocked three times then stuffed her hands into her pockets.

"Katherine?" James' father answered the door and let her in after rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "Do you know what time it is?"

"Are James and Sirius here?" she asked, ignoring his question.

"The whole gang is," he said and told her to wait in the living room while he got them.

"No, I'll just go up, if that's okay." After a moment of hesitation, he nodded and followed her up the stairs. She pushed open the door to James' room and saw the guys sprawled out across the huge room. She closed the door behind her and sunk to the floor. No one stirred as she sucked in a breath, but James jolted awake when she couldn't hold it in and slammed her fist against the door.

"Kit?" he rubbed his eyes and squinted at her. He was as blind as a bat without his glasses, but he could pick her out anywhere.

"I just needed to be here, okay?" In the dark he nodded and walked over to her, carefully stepping over his sleeping friends.

"That's fine," he sat beside her and put an arm behind her. She put her head on his shoulder and relished in the momentary serenity. She let herself relax and finally fall asleep.

* * *

Kit woke with a stiff neck and cramped muscles. She was lying on her stomach across the floor of James' room, her head lying against Sirius's arm. He stirred and looked down at her with a smile.

"Morning, love," he mumbled and grabbed her hand. "My, what a lovely ring. Who is the lucky guy?"

"You should meet him. He's a prat with the biggest ego in recorded history and walks around like he's some sex god." Kit laughed and rolled away from him. She stood slowly, groaning when her muscles protested. Sirius followed her and wrapped an arm around her waist.

"Watch it, or else I may actually think we're engaged." Kit warned but did little to get away from his grip. Sirius had been like that since the Blackest of Nights and if he needed to find a way to thank her without actually saying thank you, she wasn't going to stop him.

"Get a room, newly weds," Remus said dryly when they stumbled into the kitchen. James was laughing at it, which was a good sign. He knew it was all a joke and that something happened that night. He didn't know what, but if his two best friends wanted to keep it a secret, he couldn't stop them.

"Piss off," Sirius reached over Kit to grab a piece of toast and stuffed it in his mouth as someone knocked on the door. Peter jumped to get it after realizing no one else would.

"Ew!" Kit jumped away from Sirius and tried to shake the crumbs out of her hair. She smacked him on the arm but froze when she heard Rose's familiar voice come from the corridor. The Marauders, save for Peter, exchanged looks and went back to what they'd been doing with smiles on their faces. Kit should have felt a bit guilty about doing this, especially after last night, but she needed and laugh and thought that Rose would need one too. Sirius took his place behind Kit and wrapped his arms around her. She put her left hand on top so the twinkling ring was visible. Rose walked into the kitchen a moment later and looked around.

"Peter says someone is getting married?" she asked, confused. She looked at each one intently, pausing when she got to Sirius and Kit. Kit made a show of pushing her hair back with her left hand, but the theatrics weren't needed. Rose took one look at them wrapped up in each other's arms and fainted. Peter was nearest and caught her, carrying her over to the nearest seat.

"Look at that, Prongs. You reacted like a girl," Sirius patted him on the back and went off chuckling to get some coffee.

"Coffee? While my cousin is passed out?" Kit rolled her eyes. "Thank god I'm not actually getting married to you."

"Wait, we're not actually getting married?" Sirius looked hurt for all of half a second before grinning at Kit. Kit rolled her eyes again and tried to fan Rose.

"Here," Sirius waved a cup of black coffee under her nose, obviously thinking it would wake her. Kit scoffed and took to mug away.

"You obviously don't know Rose at all. She's not a coffee person." Kit looked around for something in the kitchen and finally plucked a banana from a fruit bowl and peeled it under Rose's nose.

"Bananas? Really?" Sirius looked at the fruit incredulously but watched as Rose slowly woke.

"You bet. I don't know why; these things are foul." Kit held the banana out for Rose, wiping her hands on Sirius's shirt.

"Well, my coffee helped," Sirius pouted and watched as Rose's eye flicked between the two of them.

"Rosie,"

"You are getting married?" Rose asked slowly.

"We've been engaged by his family. They seem to think that this was a perfect match," Kit scrunched her nose up at Sirius who was messing around with his hair.

"But you are engaged?" Rose was sitting up now and sipping the coffee hesitantly. Sirius smirked triumphantly at Kit.

"Technically and legally, yes. Here's the thing, since this was an arranged marriage and the groom's family made the arrangements, the bride's family has no say." She saw Rose go to say something and she waved her hand. "Stupid pure blood wizard rules. They don't make any sense, but until Sirius or I is seventeen and we can legally break up, we are technically engaged."

"That make absolutely no sense," Rose said with a small smile.

"Tell me about. I have to be legally bound to this dolt for a whole three months," Kit looked across at him and shook her head. "It'll never work out between us,"

"Don't I know that," Sirius laughed and smiled broadly when Rose joined him, however hesitantly.

"Why would there be such a strange rule?" Rose asked.

"Because back in the day, the women never got much say. So instead of running into problems with how the women were being treated, it was just put into wizarding law." Remus said from his perch. The top of his head was just visible from over the top of the _Daily Prophet_.

"Thanks, nerd," Sirius joked as he took Rose's coffee and drank it himself.

"Can I see that?" Kit asked, reaching across the table to get the paper.

Remus folded down a corner of the paper and raised an eyebrow. "You want to read the paper?"

"Do you even know me? Of course not. I just want the funnies," Kit smiled at Remus as he shook his head and handed them over.

"Thanks!" She scanned them and focused on something. "You know what I don't understand? Why would a wizarding paper publish horoscopes? I mean, unless you actually believe in prophecies and divination, it a load of crap."

"Then why do you read it every week?"

"Because it's funny. Listen to this: Aries, beware of danger on the horizon. You choices have repercussions." Kit's voice lost its joking tone the more she read of her horoscope and despite what she said earlier, there was dread forming in her gut. It eerily similar to what her father had been warning her about. She looked at, her gaze flickering between Sirius and Rose. There was a flash of worry as she looked at Sirius, but she hastened to hide it. She ruffled the paper and shook her head.

"Load of bull, like I said." Kit tossed the paper into a waste bin and braced her hands against the table. There was nothing to horoscopes, they were just a load of crap printing by second-rate Seers. There was no truth in it. Then why had it made her so nervous?

"Kit?" she looked up to see James looking at her and she nodded.

"I'm fine. Just didn't get a good night sleep last night."

* * *

**There it is, folks! I've got a few more chapters to post today and hopefully I'll be able to really bump up my word count. **

**Dahlia  
**


	18. Chapter 18

New Year's Day was upon them and at the Ruskova house, decorations were being put up. A score of candles had been charmed to float about the main floor. There was a large array of bottles on the kitchen counter which Kit had put out in no particular order. Remus was rearranging them into different types of alcohol.

"No one is going to notice, Moony." Kit said as she put another armful onto the counter.

"I will and it will bother me all night," he went back to arranging them like they were a flower bouquet and ignored Kit's laughter. She walked out into the foyer and made sure there was enough room for everyone's jackets then went into the living room where James and Sirius were charming more candles to never burn out, never catch fire to anything else and to float.

"What are we telling people?" Kit asked Sirius, leaning against the wall.

"That we're engaged." He stopped and walked over to her. "If a certain someone if expecting us to be engaged, then we should be engaged." He whispered, giving her a meaningful look. There were probably going to he Slytherins at the party, or at least someone who had contact with them so if they wanted to stay out of trouble for a while, they were going to have to play happy family for a while. At least until people were too drunk to notice they were with different people.

"Fine," Kit groaned and told him only for a little while.

"Good," Sirius bent and brushed his lips against her temple. She could handle that; it was not unlike kissing family on the cheek in greeting. "Shall I call you babe?"

"Not babe! Eric called me babe," Kit rolled her eyes and looked up at the ceiling.

"Honey?"

"That's what my mom calls me."

"Aw, that's cute."

"Bugger off,"

"Kitty? Cat? Kitty cat?"

"That's just gross." Kit smiled up at him. "It's perfect."

James coughed and laughed when they jumped apart. "How'd you even get the house to yourself?"

"We've been over this. My parents trust me. And they trust your parents, who are near by and can help if things get out of hand. Besides, I know I've got one sober tonight to keep people in line."

"Who?"

"Peter promised to stay bright eyed for me."

"Lightweight," Sirius and James coughed at the same time, smirking at each other.

"Be nice," Kit warned and left them to getting ready. She went up stairs and knocked on Rose's door. It was strange to think that this was where her cousin would be staying from now on. Or until she moved out.

"Can I come in?"

"Sure," Kit pushed open the door to see Rose standing at the foot of her bed, looking at a bunch of outfits splayed across the bedspread. "Help. Which one should I wear?"

"Rose, I am useless with this stuff."

Rose looked down at her cousin and nodded. "I know. You are not even ready yet. Now, choose." Rose waved a hand across the bed and went over to the vanity to do her make up.

There were a bunch of skirts and glittery tops. Kit didn't see a single pair of pants in the whole mix and every shirt was either flimsy or frilly or shiny. "Uhhh," Kit closed her eyes and pointed at one at random.

"There," Kit pointed at a little black skirt with a white lace top.

"Goodie! That was my favourite," Rose scooped it up and bounded over to the bathroom.

"Then why did you need my help?" Kit asked, but the door had already shut. Rolling her eyes, Kit looked at the remaining tops. There wasn't a single one that Kit would consider wearing on a regular basis, but a few seemed harmless enough. There was one that even looked like a normal shirt. It was champagne coloured and when she picked it up, Kit found that the back was not a single panel, as a normal shirt would be, but twenty overlapping strips of fabric that crossed haphazardly across the back. It left a lot of skin bared and was oddly reminiscent of the red dress she'd worn to the Black's.

"Borrowing one of your shirts!" Kit yelled and threw it over her arm.

"I knew you would!"

"Why didn't you answer me last time?" Kit heard Rose laughed but got no reply. Sometimes she wondered about her cousin. She walked out and pushed open the door to her room with her hip. She gave Sirius a look, but went about getting her things out while he sat on her bed.

"We need to talk about what'll happen tonight," he said as she pulled a pair of leather pants from her closet. They were cut to look like muggle motocross pants with seams across the knees and Kit adored them. Even Sirius admitted to liking them.

"We act like a couple until people seem drunk enough to not notice I'm off with whoever and you're off with Rosie doing god only knows what."

"We need to look convincing,"

Kit spun and rose an eyebrow at him. "Oh, I see. This is a ploy to try and get into my awesome leather pants." She scooped her clothes up and shook her head. "Not going to happen Sirius. You're like a brother for one, and Rose would probably lob my head off if she saw."

"So she does fancy me!"

"You're supposed to be my fiance, remember?" Kit gave him a look then walked into her bathroom.

"Katherine, we are engaged. Do you really need to go somewhere else to change?" He got a door slammed in his face as a response. Kit smiled at the shut door before hopping and dancing into her pants. It took a while since leather wasn't the easiest fabric to get into, but eventually she had them on and was pulling the borrowed shirt over her head. There was one major problem with the shirt. There were twenty-something straps along the back and Kit could only reach about five of them. With a groan, she walked out and asked for Sirius's help.

"Sure," he got up and began unrolling and setting the fabric right. His fingers grazed her back as he set each one against her skin. When he finished, he traced the places where she skin showed. Kit shivered and jumped away.

"Stop it! Ew, you're like my brother!" Kit shook herself and crossed her arms. Sirius let out his barking laugh, doubling over.

"Oh, Kit, you'll never make it through tonight." He went to the door, laughing as he did.

"What on earth are you planning?"

Sirius popped his head back and smiled crookedly at her. "Expect the worst," he leant in and pressed a quick kiss against her cheek. Kit wiped at her face and stuck her tongue out at him.

"I might just crack a firewhiskey bottle over your head if you try anything!" She yelled but he just laughed in response. Eugh, he was impossible to deal with! Kit ran a hand through her hair and let it stay messy and wavy around her face. With a glance at the clock, Kit saw it was nearly time for people to start arriving. She jumped down the steps, sliding down the railing until she jumped off at the foyer. Sirius was already there, looking dashing for Sirius. Which meant his hair was mussed up and he was wearing a button down unbuttoned so it showed off just enough of his chest. Kit rolled her eyes at it and gave him a little push.

"No funny business, okay? It'll be hard enough to keep everything in line without having to worry about you,"

"Where's your sense of adventure?" Sirius reached out and pulled her to him. "C'mon, it'll be fun. A night of no commitment. Not even a whole night, a few hours tops. You can't tell me you never thought about spending a night with this,"

"Maybe when I was young and impressionable, but I know better now." She looked up at his hopeful grin and sighed. "Fine. But only because you love theatrics."

"Good," he smirked and ran a hand through her hair.

"Wait until there's actually an audience," Kit pulled away when she heard people coming and saw James, Remus and Peter join them in the foyer. They face the fireplace and Kit reached out to take the Butterbeer from Remus.

"Get your own," he told her with a smile.

"When is everyone coming?" Kit turned as best she could in Sirius's arms to see Rose standing there, looking stunning. Sirius whistled softly, just loud enough for Kit to hear.

"Why did I agree to be with you?"

"It was your idea, remember?"

"Get everyone drunk really fast," Sirius hissed and tore his eyes away from Rose to look down at Kit.

"I'll do my best," Kit said and gave Sirius a smack. A moment later people appeared in the fireplace. "Hey," Kit greeted them and pointed them in the direction of the kitchen. With a wave of her wand, music began to play. Not the annoying classical stuff they played at the balls at Hogwarts. Really music. Rock. Then a stream of people started coming in and soon Kit's house was nearly filled. There were people she knew, people she didn't, rich, middle class, Hufflepuffs and Gryffindors, even a few of students that had already graduated.

"You and Sirius are getting hitched?" one asked, and Kit remembered him to be the chaser from the Slytherin Quidditch team.

"Yeah, this summer," Kit snuggled into Sirius and gave him a little nudge. Sirius nodded and whispered something in Kit's ear that made her blush furiously. His hands slid down to her hips and he moved them to the music until the chaser went away. Kit went to ask him where he'd learnt such awful things, but he pulled her close.

"They're still looking," there was a bunch of graduated guys standing together in one corner and they watched the couple suspiciously. Kit smiled up at Sirius coyly and with an internal sigh, she kissed him. Sirius smiled against her lips and let his hands slide down into her back pockets. He turned her so the guys could see and made her jump against him.

"Sirius," she warned, but he was distracted. Rose walked past, jumping along with the music. Sirius groaned and watched her go.

"They're still looking." Kit grabbed his face and pulled him back, leading him into the living room and backing up onto one of the couches.

"Stay here, alright?" she asked but was off before he could say anything.

"Rose!" Kit yelled and grabbed her cousin's shoulder. "I want to talk to you!" Kit pulled her away and walked until they could hear each other.

"What?" Rose wasn't bitter, but she wasn't exactly pleased with her cousin either.

"Rose, Sirius and I, it's an act. There are a bunch of people we think are with the Dark Lord. They already know about the attack on the Blacks, then. Sirius and I have to look like a couple if we want them off of our backs for a while. And it needs to look like I'm in charge."

"If they're here, why isn't your father here? He was worried this would happen,"

"I told him it would just be you and the gang," Kit admitted, looking a little ashamed.

"Kit!"

"I'm sorry. But don't get angry with me about Sirius. And trust me, if I had a choice, I wouldn't be doing this. Please?"

Rose looked at her cousin and nodded before heading back into the party. That had gone marginally better than anticipated, but Kit couldn't do much about it. She headed back and found Sirius flirting with a girl. She glared at them and stomped over, making sure to get the girl out of the way. One of the Slytherins was on the couch and near enough to hear their conversation.

"Sirius! We're engaged! Can't you just keep it in your pants, for once?" Kit looked back at where the girl was retreating and snorted. "She was probably a half blood too," she sneered and made sure Sirius caught her eye. He went to defend the girl but Kit silenced him with a quick kiss.

"Your bleeding heart needs to stop." She told him and gave the Slytherin a look before climbing over Sirius and planting a knee on either side of his thighs. Sirius looked up at her, the mock hunger in his eyes. She let him take over from there on and eventually the guy left out of discomfort. When he did, Kit all but jumped away from Sirius and pulled him up into the bathroom. She locked the door behind them and went about washing her mouth out.

"Oh, come one. It wasn't that bad," he complain and sat down on the counter.

"Sirius Orion Black, you are like a brother to me. It was bad on every level. It was just, ew." Kit scrubbed her tongue and hoped to get the feeling of him out of her. Sirius hopped up from the counter and banged a hand against the wall.

"You're not _that_ upset, are you?" she asked incredulously, but caught on when he made a rather loud and disgusting sound.

"Oh, Sirius, _gross!" _Kit hissed but he did it again and nodded at her to do the same. "No way, not a chance!"

"Kit," he moaned loud enough that she could hear the cat calls in return.

"You're going to pay," she hissed before bumping her hip against the wall and moaned. "I hate you. Merlin, do I hate you. You're ruining my reputation."

"Like you had a sparkling one to begin with,"

"Not in this sense!"

"I knew it would happen eventually," Kit heard someone say as they passed the bathroom and heard the thumping. Kit's mouth hung open as she looked at the door, her brows furrowed.

"No, no, no. People don't actually think that, do they?" Kit sat on the counter and continued to hit the wall in sync with Sirius.

"Apparently so." He looked at her then away before speaking. "After this, can we go different ways? It'll just look like you got embarrassed and wanted some time away from me."

"I forgot you were so knowledgeable," Kit mumbled but nodded. He grinned and pulled her down from the counter. He reached back and wrinkled the straps of her shirt, folding them over and moving them so they laid even more haphazardly across her back. He mussed her hair up then tried to flatten it. The result was something not unlike a hornets nest on top of her head. He kissed her roughly and bit down on her neck twice until she cried out. He smirked up at her, an absolutely filthy look on his face, which only broadened when she realized what she'd done.

"I'm going to kill you," she told him as he undid the buttons of his shirt and moved his pants to sit diagonally on his hips. He ran a hand through his hair while he tried to mess up his shirt. With a groan, Kit held his head and mussed his hair up herself.

"I knew you'd get into it eventually." He smirked at her then grabbed his wand. He told her to stand against a wall. He stood in front of her and picked her up. He pointed his wand at the spot on the wall where her back was braced against and let her down a moment later. When Kit turned there was a damp spot on the wall.

"Okay, that's gross," she watched him get his hands wet and run them along his hairline.

"It is exercise," Sirius shrugged and put the finishing touches on. Kit followed his lead and dampened her forehead. "Now for the finale,"

"Not a hope in hell. Sirius, not a chance. Sirius, stop it. I mean it stop!" But he went on making lewd noises and smirking at her. Kit looked away, unable to keep looking at him and joined him. She would regret this later in life, she knew it and Sirius would never let her live it down.

"There, it wasn't so bad, was it Kitty?" he pressed a quick kiss against her cheek then ducked out and was met with a round of cheers. Kit sat back for a moment and tried to forget what she'd just done. Her cheeks burned as she stepped out and looked sheepishly at the leers she got from the guests. She noted that the group of assumed Death Eaters looked pleased and with a nod at each other, they left. Kit tried to fool herself into believe that they truly believed the act. But it wasn't them she was worried about. She'd be a fool to think that the Dark Lord would have the wool pulled over his eyes.

"You certainly get around fast," someone remarked as she walked through to the kitchen where the alcohol was. Kit laughed half-heartedly and skipped past the group. She grabbed the first bottle she could find and took a deep drink. Sighing and putting her head on the counter, she didn't see Rose and James behind her. But she did hear him yell for everyone to get out. They did and after a round of grumbles and annoyed looks, they all went to the fireplace. Kit heard someone say they had room at their house and that the party was being moved elsewhere.

Kit turned and saw James and Rose tangled up in each other on one of the chairs. "At least I had the decency to get a room," she muttered and glared at the two of them.

"Decency? You think anything about that was decent?" James waved at hand at the bathroom she'd just come from.

"James, you're such a twat! What part of an act don't you understand? It was a lie."

"Sirius looks pretty proud of himself," James muttered, letting his hand run along Rose's arm. Kit glared at it as his fingers trailed along her skin, her lips pulling into a sharp line.

"Do you even know Sirius? He looks happy because now everyone thinks he's successfully shagged every girl in our year." Kit gave a sound at the back of her throat and turned away from them.

"I thought you said you didn't want to be with Pads!" James yelled at her as she climbed the steps. Kit turned and without thinking, walked down to look him in the eye.

"James, we had to pretend to be together."

"Why?"

"You wouldn't understand," Kit turned to leave but James grabbed her.

"Why do you always say that? Without fail, you always say that when you don't want to talk about something. I'm not dim, Kit, I think I can keep up." Kit could smell Rose's perfume on him and it was making her sick. She could see Rose and Sirius behind James and she struggled against him.

"It's not just my problem to share, James. I'm entitled to have secrets, just like you." Kit pulled free and rolled her eyes. "If you're such a good friend, you'd know I need some things to stay private."

"Kit, I think he should know," Rose said quietly. Kit turned to look at her a ran a hand over her face.

"Why? So he can act brave and do something stupid? No, I am going to take care of this."

"You can't actually fool yourself into thinking you can beat him on your own." Sirius said.

"I can! I will do this on my own. This isn't even your problem! It's mine and Rose's, that's it."

"Why do you have to do everything on your own?" Sirius asked, anger lacing into his words.

"The same reason you hate your family; it's who I am. Because if I don't I will pull you all into it and you'll get hurt." Despite the heartfelt words, Kit's voice was still stony and exasperated. Why did nobody get it? This was her problem and she would fix it. On her own. Because she couldn't bear the thought of knowing she'd put them in danger. Rose stepped out and out a hand on her shoulder. Kit winced yanked it back. Couldn't people just understand that she wanted to do this alone?

"Katherine, we are not weak. We will do this together. With or without your permission." Rose looked at her honestly and Kit could feel her trying to calm her cousin down.

"Okay, so you all want to run head first into He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named and try and kill him for me? And then what? Leave me to pick up the pieces?"

"We are stronger together," Rose said. Kit tried to ignored the way James' face had contorted. At least he knew what he was in for.

"And more likely to be picked off one by one. He's ruthless. This isn't some duel with Malfoy, this is serious."

"When did you become an expert on him? I thought you just found out about this," Sirius pointed out.

"Hearing that my uncle was torn to shreds shed some light on how he acts. My parents told me." She paused and took a breath, horrible thoughts plaguing her mind. "My dad told me. He warned me." Kit sat down on the stairs and glared at her friends. "This isn't a joke."

"We know that. It's precisely why we are not letting you do it alone." Rose sat beside her and put an arm around her. "We are going back to Hogwarts soon and my parents said Dumbledore is safe. He will help us." Kit allowed a small smile on her face. The fireplace blazed to life and green flames shot out for a moment before her parents stepped out.

"Dad!" Kill yelled and ran at him. He gathered her up and held her close and winced when she held him tighter.

"Thank you," he whispered, pressing a kiss against her head. "He's not convinced, but he's willing to move on for now." Relief flooded through Kit and she held tighter to his broad shoulders. She pulled back at look intently at his face.

"Dad?" she asked, her concern evident. Her friends' heads popped up and they watched as Kit and her mother all but pulled Luka into the sitting room. "What happened?" she asked her mother. He looked physically fine but his eyes held something dark. There were no cuts, no blood, but he looked like he'd aged considerably in a few hours. She bit on her thumb as she paced, afraid to hear the answer.

"I thought you said he was moving on,"

"But we attacked the Blacks." Tori said quietly, aware of Kit's friends nearby. Kit looked back at them and shook her head at her mom.

"They know enough." Luka groaned at his daughter and shook his head.

"Why would you get them involved?" he hissed at her. It suddenly became evident where the protective and stand-alone part of Kit's personality came from. "This was a matter entirely within the family!"

"Luka," Tori tried to soothe him and ran a hand across his brow.

"No. I will not have them involved. It's too dangerous." Luka groaned as he stood and left to sit in his study. Tori age her daughter a kiss on the cheek then followed him.

"I'll make him see sense," she said softly before the door clicked shut behind her. Kit took a steadying breath and turned back to her friends. They looked upset by what had happened. James got up and hugged her.

"We'll leave. But if you need anything, we're just down the road." James hesitated for a moment then pressed his lips against her temple. Kit didn't even react. She stood in the same spot as they left, and Rose stayed on the steps.

"Kit?"

"Physical, I can deal with. It heals and everyone moves on. But that..." Kit shook her head and her shoulders slumped. "It's different, it's difficult to move on from." She ran a hand through her hair and curled her hands into fists. "Now that sick bastard is screwing with their minds." And Kit was stuck at home because she was too young. She felt useless all of a sudden.

"Has been long night. Come, we sleep now." Rose stood and led Kit up the stairs. She walked with her into her room and sat on the bed beside Kit.

"It's like what happened with Lev, only now that bully is the most powerful dark wizard and Lev is my family." When she and Rose were young and still living in Russia, they had been friends with a boy names Lev. They used to play in the park by their house, but these older boys used to make fun and Lev and push him around. Kit tried to stop them, but they just pushed her away. They always came home covered in scrapes and cuts. Lev's parents blamed her for what had happened and told Kit that she couldn't play with him anymore. Kit had fought and screamed and been sick for three weeks until she'd had enough and marched over to his house. Turned out the boys had been back and really given Lev a beating since she wasn't around. It was Kit's fault he'd been hurt; she hadn't been there for him. Now her family was being hurt and she couldn't do anything because she was too young and her parents didn't want her in danger.

Kit ran a hand over her face and thanked Rose. "I just don't want anyone getting hurt," she said as she climbed into bed, still in her leather pants.

"We won't let that happen." Rose assured her and gave her shoulder a squeeze. Kit hoped she was right.


	19. Chapter 19

Kit found herself back at Hogwarts all too soon. But at the same time, entering the safety of it's hallowed walls allowed her to exhale and relax at last. She felt safe, like the world was a million miles away. She could try and forget about the threat looming over her family and friends. Until, of course, the Headmaster called them in for a meeting. Rose and Kit stood in front of his desk and waited for him to finished reading the letter he held in his hands.

"I assume you know the details of your family's history,"

"The bones of it," Kit said. "Enough to know that our fathers made a ruckus with they disagreed with the blood supremacy thing."

"Yes, Katherine. It caused quite a stir. In this letter, Misha has asked for protection for the both of you. You know that no one can Apparate onto the grounds?"

"Yes,"

"These grounds are secure, so you are safe. But we will have extra precautions at night and all the professor will keep an eye out for any trouble the students might cause."

Kit nodded and looked at her shoes, scuffing one against the other. She wanted to ask him something, but she knew he'd frown upon it, so she tried to hold her tongue.

"What of our parents?" Rose asked, saving Kit the trouble of speaking.

"Tori is an accomplished Auror, Luka a healer and both your parents are very skilled. Aside from their own power, the Aurors at the Ministry have taken initiative to give them extra protection." he smiled at them briefly before putting the letter down at looking at them seriously.

"You understand how dangerous this man is. While I can assure of your safely while you are on these grounds, I must give you a warning for the spring break and this summer. There are Death Eaters everywhere. I'm sorry this can't be easier or kinder, but he has allies in many places. I urge you to take extra care in where you go. You are both to bright to be lost so young,' he gave a twinkled eyed, fatherly smile then dismissed them. Kit nodded and followed Rose down the stairs. But rose stopped and looked at her cousin seriously.

"I am going back to Russia." Rose said, her eyes downcast and almost frantic with worry.

"Are you out of your mind!" She'd get caught or seen or taken. Rose shook her head and slumped against the wall.

"You do not understand, you get to know your parents are okay, I do not have that luxury. I will take precautions, will not go straight home. I will...I will stay with Josef. I am safe with him. He will not let anything hurt me." Rose looked as upset as the idea as Kit was. Kit grabbed her shoulders and gave her a shake.

"Then I am coming with you,"

"You will do no such thing. You will stay here at the school and I will go and you will say nothing. To anyone!" Rose told her shrilly. Kit went to argue but she was cut off. Rose said she'd be back by the end of the week. "You must stay here Katherine. Promise me. "

"Rose,"

"Promise, Katherine."

Kit tried to stare her cousin down but broke and nodded slowly. "Fine. I'll stay here." Kit put her had on Rose's shoulder. "Give them my love." She said and gave her cousin a fierce hug. She was leaving that night and Kit would be sick with worry until she came back.

"Write everyday. If I don't get a letter from you, so help me, I'll kill you when you get back." The dark thought that Kit not getting a letter might have meant Rose was captured or worse wasn't spoken. But it was understood. Kit gripped Rose a bit tighter then went to the common room without looking back. She'd come back in one piece, she'd be fine.

She ran into Sirius as she was entering the common room and he was leaving. He took one look at her and his eyes went wide.

"You're letting her go!" Sirius had the letter in his hand and tried to push past Kit.

"Pads," Kit put her hands on his chest and pushed him back into the room. "She needs to make sure her family is okay."

"You should go with her. Someone should go with her,"

"As much as I hate to admit it, she can take care of herself. It's only until the end of the week and she's staying with a friend of hers." Kit led him to the couch and sat beside him. "She loves her family. She needs to make sure they're okay, especially after finding out that they might be targeted."

"She'd better come back," he muttered darkly and looked out at the window.

"Sirius, can I ask you something?" He grunted and ran a hand through his hair. It was falling into his face now, almost reaching his cheeks now. "What does Rose mean to you?" He shifted and looked away, tucking the letter into his pocket. "Sirius?"

"I don't know." He admitted finally. "She's not just a fling,"

"So she's not another Ana Turner?" There may have been a hint of bitterness in Kit's voice. Or perhaps a lot.

"Nothing like her. But I don't know." Sirius sat back a flicked a hand through his hair.

"You can tell. I've confided in you often enough," Kit settled against him and let him think. She took the time to admire the fake ring on her finger. She wondered if Rose would be wearing one similar to it soon.

"She's just perfect. I feel like hitting anyone who looks at her and when she smiles it's like..." he trailed off and coughed in embarrassment. Kit didn't say anything but couldn't help but think that maybe, just maybe, Hogwarts resident playboy had fallen in love.

* * *

Kit was walking down the hall during a break when someone called for her. She spun and got a fist pushed into her stomach. Wheezing, she doubled over, but someone grabbed her hair and pulled her head up.

"You think you're so powerful," they mocked as she reached for her wand. "You think you can get away with shaming my family," Regulus jabbed his wand into her ribs and hissed a hex in her ear. Pain shot through her side and the vision of his smirking face above her blurred.

"Your family didn't need any help to do that," she wheezed, grabbing at her side. He grabbed her shirt and slammed her against the wall, her head cracking against it painfully.

"Did that hurt?" he caught the winced she gave when he pushed his wand against her side. "This is nothing compared to what he'll do to you and your family. You'll learn to beg for mercy." Regulus slid his wand down her side and Kit could feel the sickly warm flow of blood down her skin. "Beg," he ordered her. She twisted her face away from him and locked her jaw tight. He tightened his grip on her arm and pressed the tip of his wand into the fresh wound. She screamed in pain, crying out and thrashing against him.

"Mr Black!" Professor McGonagall rounded the corner and Regulus jumped away from Kit. "Headmaster's office. Now!" Regulus went off past her, sending Kit a smile over her shoulder. Kit slumped and clutched her side. The Transfiguration professor fixed the wound and helped her back to the common room. Rose couldn't know about this, Kit thought as she bit back a moan from just sitting down. She couldn't know.

* * *

Kit dutifully received a letter each night from Rose and by the end on the week poor Magus didn't even try to be mean to Kit. He was exhausted from the frequent trips back and forth and Kit let him rest in her room until she'd replied. Then she gave him the letter, some food she'd snuck from the dinner and let him take his time before he went off. But despite the fact Rose's letter were sent to calm Kit, she found herself getting more and more worried with each one. Rose still hadn't found her parents and Kit couldn't fight the icy feeling in her gut.

Kit held the most recent letter in her hand, where Rose, or Isolde as she wrote in the letters, had told Kit, or Lynette, that she would be home soon. Rose tried to sound okay, but even in her writing Kit could tell things were right. She ran to the Headmaster's office and banged on the door.

"I need to use your fireplace," she said breathlessly when he opened the door. It was the only fireplace that had Floo that Kit knew of. Dumbledore nodded and let her in. She dove for the fireplace stuck her head in, yelling the names of her house.

"Mom! Dad!" she called and sighed in relief when they both came rushing to the fireplace.

"Katherine, what's wrong?" Luka asked, his face dark with worry.

She'd swore to Rose that she wouldn't tell anybody where she was but she couldn't let her parents be ignorant. "Rose's parents are missing." Luka and Tori looked at each other for a moment before they asked permission to Floo into the office.

"Of course," Dumbledore nodded and they stepped back to let Luka and Tori out. Immediately, Kit was gathered into their arms and she pressed her face into her father's chest. He ran his hand down her back and held her close. For a moment, Kit believed everything would be okay, just so long as her dad kept holding her. But soon she was standing on her own and her heart raced frantically again. What if they were dead? What if Rose had gone looking for them? A million thoughts and questions ran through her mind, each one more distressing than the last. They jumbled together and buzzed around like wasps in her head, each one leaving the stinging realization that each one could be true. Kit felt a shadow of pain rush through her and she held her side. She heard Dumbledore give an order than Sirius, James, Remus and Peter were to come to his office immediately. Kit stared at the fireplace, willing it to show Rose's face or fill with green flames and for Rose to step out. She heard her friends rush in and felt James take her hand but she refused to take her eyes off of the fireplace.

"Do you know where they are?" James asked quietly.

"Not a clue,"

"And Rose?"

"She's probably gone looking for her," she said quietly and Luka heaved a sigh and braced himself against the table, exactly like Kit always did.

"This is why I didn't want anyone else involved."

"Rose is part of the family, dad. She's a part of this whether anyone wants her to be. Just like I am."

"No, you will not get involved." Luka's face turned ruddy under his usual cool visage, but Kit met it head on.

"I already am, dad." Luka went to say something, his gaze dark as he stared down at his daughter, but there was a bang as the door slammed against the inside wall. Misha stood there, looking like hell, but everyone focused instead on the familiar, pale-haired limp form in his arms.

"Albus, help us!" Misha said, his voice raw and he put Rose on the desk. He and Luka began talking in low and rapid Russian.

"Papa?" Rose's weak voice made everyone stop and look down at the girl who seemed to be drained of all life, of all energy. Her eyes slid back shut before she heard Misha call for her and grab her hand.

"Mr Lupin and Mr Pettigrew, go get Madam Pomfrey. Mr Black and Mr Potter get Professor Slughorn and tell him we need the strongest sleeping draughts he has. Explain her condition," Dumbledore saw them off before turning to Kit. She stood in the same place, her eyes now fixed on her cousin sprawled across his desk.

"Where were you?" she asked her uncle quietly.

"The old family home," he said without thinking. Luka knew his daughter too well and grabbed her before she'd taken a single step.

"Katherine, you cannot face him. I cannot lose you!"

"I can't lose Rose! He might have killed her, dad! Doesn't that mean anything to you?" Kit grabbed her wand and fought against her father's arms.

"Kit, she'll be fine,"

"You don't know that!" Kit screamed, her face contorting into pure agony mixed with hate. "He can't get away. I won't let him!"

A small voice broke through Kit's cries, asking her not to leave. Kit froze and slumped against her father. "I won't, Rosie. I won't." Kit's head was pounding, and she felt exhausted. Kit followed her family and friends as they went to the Hospital Wing and she took the seat by Rose's bed. She tried to stay up and keep an eye on her, but she was fast asleep in a moment.

* * *

Kit jolted awake when someone put a hand on her shoulder. Rubbing her eyes and looking around, she saw James standing behind her with two cups of tea.

"Here," he handed one to her and sat in the seat beside her. "How's she doing?"

"Good. They, uh, say he used an Unforgivable curse on her," Her hands tightened around the mug, the hot china scalding her fingers, but she only winced and didn't release her grip.

"How are you holding up?" he asked carefully after blowing on his tea. Kit looked down at the swirls of steam rising from her mug and tried to figure out how she felt.

"It's my fault." She said finally, the guilt that sat heavily on her shoulders settling more comfortably now that she'd admitted it.

"What makes you think that?"

"I should have stopped her. I just should have done something or gone after her. I could have stopped this." Kit glared down at her mug. James put his tea down and wrapped an arm around her.

"Kit, this isn't your fault. There wasn't anything you could do to stop her,"

"I could have gone with her."

"And then you'd be lying here, just like she is and we'd have two friends in the Hospital Wing." James held her until she gave in and settled against him. "She'll be fine, Kit. And one day, you and I will take care of him. For good." He pulled her close and ran his hand along her arm until her drifted back to sleep. He gently plucked the mug from her hands and set it on the table. He sat with her for some time, alone to think about the slumbering girl beside him before the rest of the gang walked in. They were already quiet since they didn't want to disturb Rose, but doubly so when they saw Kit sleeping. Rose had been in the Hospital Wing for two days, awake but tired and weak. Kit had barely slept since the night Rose had come back and they were worried.

"How is she?" Sirius asked quietly, trying not to wake anyone.

"She feels guilty. She's blaming herself." James watched as Kit's eyes flicked around behind her closed lids and sighed.

"It's survivor's guilt," Remus said quietly. "It's what happens when someone close to a person gets hurt. Even if there isn't a remote possibility that they could have helped, the guilt that they are fine and someone they love is hurt gnaws at them."

There was a moment of silence as they watched Kit shifted around in her sleep. "How do you know about it?" Peter asked.

Remus sighed and looked down at the sheets, considering before he answered. "My mom was like this after I was bitten. She thought it was her fault. She still has some trouble during the full moons," Remus gave the sleeping Kit a sad smile, rubbing a spot on his hip unconsciously. It was where he'd been bit and he had a habit of rubbing it when he was upset.

"She'll be like this forever?" Peter asked but Remus just shrugged.

"Someone should take her to sleep," Rose said, her hand going up to touch Kit's limp hair.

"Rosie!" Sirius jumped up and held her hand. The others began asking her how she was and how she was feeling, but she was adamant about Kit getting some proper sleep.

"James, why don't you take her?" Rose said and grinned as he scooped her cousin up easily. Kit buried her head into the crook of his neck and Rose caught the way his face lit up when she did. James grinned at her and took Kit up to the common room. He thought about laying on the couch but worried about other people being loud. Instead, he carried her up to the dorm he, Sirius, Peter and Remus shared and laid her down. He hesitated then slowly, carefully, lowered his lips down to kiss her as she slept. She didn't stir in his bed. He pulled back suddenly, his cheeks red from his action, but he all but skipped from the room.

* * *

The first thing Kit did when she woke was find Rose and give a huge hug. She was in the common room with the rest of the guys and Kit nearly launched herself at her cousin. Rose yelped in alarm but returned the embrace. Kit pulled back and gave her a smack upside the head.

"That was for even thinking about going by yourself to find your parents. You nearly gave me a heart attack, woman." Kit grumbled but smiled with Rose laughed.

"Like you wouldn't have done exactly the same thing," She laughed as Kit rubbed her eyes and asked how long she'd been asleep.

"About a day and a half," she said and watched her cousin's eyes widen.

"Really?"

"Poor James had nowhere to sleep." Rose looked at James, who was looking rather embarrassed and trying not to show it as Kit laughed and sat beside him.

"Sorry 'bout that," she said.

"You needed the sleep," James put an arm around her and turned back to Sirius. "You said something about March Break?"

"Yeah, anyone have plans?" They all looked around at one another before Rose cleared her throat.

"I was hoping you guys would come to Russia with me. Just for a week, but there's a nice cabin up there and we'd have it to ourselves." Rosie had caught on very quickly that when it came to parties or breaks, parents weren't necessary. Or wanted. Kit smiled at her cousin and nodded.

"Of course I'm there. And James too," Kit nudged him.

"Oh, yeah. And how do you know that?"

"Because your family loves me." Kit shrugged and smiled when he eventually nodded. "So where is this cabin?"

"Way up North. But it is very beautiful and there is a small town just down the hill with the best things. There is a cafe with hot chocolate..." Kit watched as Rose got lost in her explanation to Sirius, Peter and Remus. They watched her hands as she tried to explain what the town was like. Kit caught the word chocolate and sighed.

"What I wouldn't give for some chocolate right now," she mumbled. James' chest rumbled with laughter beneath her and he asked how much she really wanted it. "Why?"

"I've got a box stashed upstairs. From early in the year. Someone left it on my bed,"

"Wait, so you're trying to pawn old and suspicious chocolate off on me?" Kit snorted and shook her head. "Not a chance."

"C'mon, I'm sure it tastes fine,"

"James, if it was just left on your bed, there's a pretty good chance it's spiked with Amortentia or something."

"That would be even better. Then you would finally just give up and date me," James wrapped his arms around Kit and held her tight even through she struggled.

"Ew, why would I date you? You're, like, Quidditch captain. Gross." Kit sneered at him the same way half the blondes in the hallway did when they saw Peter. James laughed and buried his head in Kit's shoulder.

"Your hair's getting longer," he noted when it tickled his forehead. It almost reached her chin now and hung a wavy mess about her face.

"I need to get it cut," Kit lifted a strand and looked at it disdainfully.

"I don't know. I like it," Kit thanked the gods that James couldn't see her face. She smiled and bit on her lip to try and hold it back.

"All the more reason to cut it," Kit joked and ruffled his own shaggy hair. It always looked like he'd just been dragged around the grounds backwards, and despite her teasing, Kit found the way it stuck up in the back endearing.

She frowned when she saw the flash of gold on the coffee table and leant forward.

"What's that about?" she asked Remus who was still laughing about something.

"Nothing. Nothing at all," Kit eyed him suspiciously but James just laughed and pulled her back. He moved so he was leaning back against the arm of the couch and Kit was leaning on his chest. She didn't catch Rose turn back and say something to the boys, only that they all laughed.

"Do you feel out of the loop?" she asked James.

"Oh, yeah." James gave Sirius a look but got a smirk in return. "And it looks like that's the way things are going to stay."

Kit rolled her eyes and glared at her cousin. "Great." Kit looked around and reached for her wand. It was in her back pocket, so it involved a bit up awkward movement but she raised it into the air.

"_Accio Fortenberry's guide_." Kit held her hand up and caught the book as it flew into her grasp. She gave Sirius a pointed look before flicking to the chapter dedicated to decapitation and dismemberment. Sirius cleared his throat and gulped. Kit just smiled at him from over the top of the textbook.

"What's that?" James asked, reading a particularly gruesome spell from over her shoulder.

"A book of spells. Peter got it for me for Christmas."

"By the way, I never got a chance to thank you." James sat up and Kit turned to face him on the couch.

"For?"

"The Christmas present," James grinned at her and watched Rose jump up from the room. Kit looked after her but James' hand on her cheek brought her back. "It was great,"

"Thanks," Kit smiled crookedly at him.

"I never got to give you yours," James stood and went to his room.

"It's okay!" Kit called after him but he was already gone. She looked at Remus and asked askance of him.

"Do you have any idea?"

"Not a clue," Remus said and went back too quickly to his book. He was lying, Kit thought and considered forcing the truth from him but the portrait was thrown open and Rose came in, arms laden with overdue gifts. She ran and tripped on the corner of the carpet, flying into the back of the couch. The gifts scattered across the couch and she took a moment to pick out the one with a certain name on it. She tossed it at Remus and threw one over her shoulder to Sirius who was standing behind her, very obviously look at her rear end as she bent over the couch. Kit was more than pleased when his gift hit him in his slack-jawed face.

"Nice catch, loser," she teased, ducking when he tossed a handful of paper at her. She stuck her tongue out at him childishly and jumped to hide behind Remus. Poor guy had been innocently unwrapping his gift and the next moment be was being tackled them held up like a shield.

"I leave for one minute," James said as he came down the stairs, a small box tucked under his arm.

Sirius eyed his present warily before opening it. "I hope you don't have the same sense of humour as your cousin," he said, but smiled nonetheless.

"What did Kit get you?" Rose asked innocently enough, but cast a sideways glance at Kit. They both watched at Sirius looked down at the box, an unconvincing frown worming onto his face,

"I hate you." He said as he pulled the black, lacy bra from the box. It was perfect match to the lacy thong Kit had bought for him. Kit caught Rose's eye and burst out laughing. Remus saw it and doubled over and James soon joined in, his face crinkled with the knowledge that the matching bottom was buried in the bottom of his trunk. Sirius slunk over and with an ease that made Kit wary, slid the bra over Rose's clothes and hooked it in place.

"I think it would look much better on a blonde." He said with a smirk.

"And I think that thong would look great on a guy about this tall," she raised her hand to his height, "with an ego the size of England." With a flick of her wrist, the thong was in her hand and with a nod, James pinned him down. Kit fought against his thrashing legs, but eventually got it on him and snapped the waist band.

"Don't you think it looks smashing, Rose?" she asked her cousin while trying to flatten her hair. He looked ridiculous, absolutely so with a skimpy black thong on over his trousers. Rose bent over the armchair for support and unhooked the bra. She tossed it on the armchair and burst into another round of giggles when she miss and it landed on Peter's head. Kit had to lean on James for support as Peter laughed and hooked it around his head so it looked like he had ears. Rose charmed a camera into her hands and told the boys to get close. Sirius stood by Peter, his hands on his hips as he proudly displayed his thong. At the last minute Sirius jumped onto Peter's lap. When the picture came out it showed Sirius jumping onto Peter and Peter's mousy face jumping in surprise. Poor guy look terrified. Kit was leaning on James and didn't notice the flash go until it was too late. A picture came out of her and James leaning on each other, laughing like lunatics.

"Rose!" Kit yelled and tried to get the picture, but Rose was off joking with Sirius and too distracted to notice. Or she was pointedly ignoring her cousin's protested, which was what Kit suspected.

"Here," James pushed the box into her hands and rubbed the back of his neck. She looked down at the red box and opened it carefully. Inside was a thick gold chain with a dozen little charms dangling from the end. Kit peered closely at them and saw that there were four family crests, one for James, Sirius, Rose and herself. There was a little wolf from one clasp, a rat from another, there were a pair of antlers and a bone. All of them were tiny gold figurines and there was still room on the bracelet for more.

"I know you don't wear a lot of jewelry but, I thought this could be something to remember us all by." James made a vague motion with his hands and didn't look her in the eye.

"I didn't know you ever shopped for jewelry," Kit said as she admired it.

He gave an embarrassed cough and bit his lip. "My mom helped me pick it out." He admitted, looking about as shy and bashful as a sixteen year old could look. Kit tore her gaze away from the gift and looked up at James. Her breath caught when she saw how intense his eyes were, those three cliched words easily readable in his hazel orbs. Kit threw her arms around him and pressed her lips against his. James froze, shocked, but snapped out of it and held her close. She didn't think about Remus or Peter or the fact that Sirius had taken Rose up to his room; all she was focused on was James and where he held her. She smiled against his lips and he pulled back.

"What's that for?" he asked, resting his forehead against her.

"Just me wondering why I never did this before." Kit reached out again and pressed her lips to his again. She could feel the scratch of his stubble and the softness of his lips all at once. She grabbed a handful of his shirt and pulled herself closer. James moved and led her up the stairs. He walked backwards, his lips finding her neck every few steps he pushed open the door to his dorm and pressed Kit against the door frame. His lips found hers again and they would have kept going if Sirius hadn't cleared his throat. James and Kit looked up to see Rose and Sirius in a compromising position (although, not nearly as compromising as the one she and James were in). After a moment of silence, Kit giggled and pulled James back and closed the door shut behind her. She kissed James and instead held him against the wall.

"I hope another night without a bed won't hurt you," she whispered, a smile playing across her lips. He watched as they moved around the words and he was held entranced before diving back in. His hands ran along her side, tailing along her ribs. Kit gave a wince of pain as he brushed past the long scar on her left side. James stiffened and pulled back.

"What's wrong?" his eyes were filled with concern though they were still hazy with lust.

"Nothing, just a scratch." Kit waved a hand and pulled him back before he thought too long about it. Thankfully, the feeling of his hands along her spine was enough to distract them both from anything other than the person they were attached to. 


	20. Chapter 20

Kit stretched her arms above her head and gave a satisfied smile when she heard her back crack. She slumped back down happily and popped a grape into her mouth. She was sitting across from Peter in the Great Hall, waiting for the others to come down for breakfast. Kit couldn't figure out why she'd gotten up so early, only that she had and now she was looking at Peter and wondering about something that had happened last night.

"Wormtail," Kit began, looking at him with a little smile.

"Yeah, Kit?" His watery blue eyes flicked up to her and he smiled back.

"Do you know what Rose and them were talking about last night?"

"Well, she was talking about her cabin last night and then she was talking about the food they had there-"

"About the money, Peter." Kit gave him a look and watched as he coloured and fiddled with his knife and fork.

"Oh, that was nothing," he said unconvincingly. Kit prodded him further but he stayed resolutely silent.

"Peter, please."

"I can't." He looked down at his lap.

"You like my cousin, don't you, Peter?" Kit began slowly. He nodded fervently, not catching on to what she was implying. "And if I ever angry at you, it could be very possible that Rose would feel the same way. And maybe, I don't know, not talk to you." Kit spoke lightly, choosing a pastry as she threatened her friend. "But, if you help me some time might open up in her schedule for more Charms lessons." Kit looked up from the English muffin she was pulling apart. "Got it?"

Peter looked distressed for a moment as he checked for the rest of the gang. He kept his eyes trained on his plate as he spoke. "They made a bet to see how soon you and James would start dating." Kit smiled at him and instead of being angry at the fact they'd put money on something like that, she saw opportunity.

"How much did Rose bet?"

"Ten galleons," Kit whistled and shook her head.

"And when did she say James and I would be dating by?"

"Five days. Four now." Peter squirmed and his face resembled someone having to pass a kidney stone. Kit jumped up and planted a kiss on his head.

"I think a lot of time just opened up for Rose," Kit said and smirked when she saw James walk into the Great Hall.

"Hey," he said, a still smile plastered on his face. Kit sat beside him and went about her breakfast, smiling to herself the whole time. "What are you grinning about?" he asked and Kit couldn't blame him for sounding a little wary.

"Nothing. Nothing at all," Kit looked up at the sound of wings by her head and saw one of the school's owls landing on top of her English muffin.

"I was going to eat that," she told the bird, who merely hooted in response. She took the envelope from him and offered her now ruined pastry. Her name was written on the front in red ink but there was no other name on it. She looked around the table before shrugging and turning it over. Remus, Sirius and Rose walked in as Kit opened the letter. The was a poof and a dozen rose petals flew around Kit's head. She watched them float around her and jumped when a bouquet of them came from the letter. Everyone was smiling, especially James who turned to her and took her hand.

"Will you go out with me?" he asked, his face just a bit too hopeful. Kit caught Rose smirking and covered James' hand with her own.

"Not yet," she said, a rather anticlimactic response for such a grandiose delivery. James frowned at her but brightened after a moment.

"I'll just try harder," he shrugged and went back to his breakfast. Rose's jaw was practically on the ground.

"What's the matter?" Kit asked her innocently. She just shook herself and muttered, "Nothing," before going back to her meal. If Rose ever found out, Kit would be in so much trouble. Not that Kit really minded; she liked to stir things up every once in a while.

* * *

For five more days Kit continued to refuse James, who, surprisingly, wasn't put out. When asked about it he just smiled and shrugged. She'd kissed him hadn't she? So obviously she wasn't angry at him. It was simply a matter of wooing her. And, god bless him, he did. He sent fireworks off in the Great Hall, sent her dozens of roses each day and one bouquet containing a bloom that looked far too exotic to have come cheaply. He took her outside and charmed the stars to spell out her name, he even charmed two stone cupids to serenade her as she walked to class. It got so bad at one point Professor McGonagall pulled her aside and asked her to, "Please, for all our sakes, just agree to date the boy."

So Kit was grinning from ear to ear as she walked down to the Great Hall for breakfast that morning. Her new charm bracelet danced around her wrist as her arms swung. She sat beside a very grumpy looking Rose and gave her a hug.

"What's wrong?" she asked, pouting at her cousin. Kit knew exactly what was wrong; Rose had lost a bet. In fact, she thought Rose now owed Sirius ten galleons.

"Nothing. Bad sleep," Rose waved a hand and glared at her cousin. Kit went back to eating her bacon like she didn't know anything. She glanced up when James walked in seemingly empty handed and alone. He took her hand and made her stand in the middle of the of Hall.

"Since all my other attempts failed to get the right response, I thought I'd go back to being a traditionalist." He gave a little smile and held both her hands. "Katherine, I've adored you since I can remember. Will you go out with me?"

Kit took a moment to consider, relishing in the silence then smiled. "Yeah, alright," she shrugged.

"No way!" Someone shouted from the Gryffindor table. "He charms cupids to follow her around and that doesn't get it, but all he has to do is ask her and she agrees?" Another boy laughed and nodded at the two.

"Thank Merlin that's all it took. I was beginning to think that's what was expected," he got a smack from his girlfriend and conversation resumed. Kit wrapped her arms around James and kissed him gently.

"Why'd you keep me waiting for so long?"

"Let's just say Rose is out of some money right about now." Kit laughed when he looked at the blonde, completely confused. "You're cute," she said and James scoffed.

"Nah, I'm handsome." He sat down on the bench and pulled Kit into his lap. There was a bang followed by the sound of feet stomping down stairs. Remus, Sirius and Peter appeared at the door a moment later. They ran at the table and skidded to a halt before James and Kit. They all looked at each other before Sirius let out a whoop and threw his hands up.

"You owe me!" he said to Rose then proceeded to dance around like a complete dolt. Kit laughed and shrugged at the dark look Rose was giving her. Then she stopped and challenged her cousin with a look.

"Yes, Rosie?" Kit asked.

"You are in big trouble," Rose muttered darkly.

"Are you implying that I knew about your bet?" Kit asked, raising a hand to her chest.

"Not implying," Rose said coolly and leant in. "Tonight at the lake. You're going to pay."

"She's taken a liking to the lake! Told you we were related," Kit told James with a grin. "Fine. Doing what, exactly?"

"Seeing who can stay in the lake the longest." Rose smirked and nodded out to the still chilly sky.

"With the least on," Sirius offered, a filthy look on his face as he looked at Rose. Kit shouldn't have been shocked to see the same look on James' face but cleared her throat at him nonetheless.

"Fine with me." Besides, the challenge would be to get Rose down to her skivvies. Last time Kit recalled, she'd been a bit embarrassed about changing on front of the boys, something Kit had long since moved on from. Rose smiled at her cousin and nodded.

"It's on then. See you tonight," Rose stood and gave Remus and Sirius a stern look.

"Where are you going?" Sirius asked, beginning to follow her out.

"Getting your money," Rose said, less than pleased to have to say it.

"Good," Sirius followed her out and Kit couldn't help but imagine him sprouting a tail and following her around like the dog he was. But in her mind he looked more like a puppy than the massive bear-dog he became.

"Kit," James said after watching Sirius and Rose leave.

"Yeah?"

"I'd be happy to keep you warm once you get hypothermia." James said. Kit smacked a hand against his chest but smiled.

"I guess I'd be pretty happy too,"

* * *

Kit had brought two sweaters with her, an extra pair of socks and the warmest cloak she had but looking out over the frigid waters of the lake, she began to wonder if they'd have any effect. She looked across at Rose who was shedding her cloak. Kit caught James smiling at her and pressed a quick kiss against his lips.

"I expect you to hold to your offer," she told him as she tossed various clothing onto the beach. She peeled her socks off and tossed her skirt onto the growing pile. A wind rushed by and covered her bare skin with goose bumps. She jumped around to keep warm and told Rose to hurry up.

"I never would have pegged you for that sort of person," James said lightly waving a hand at her chest. She was wearing a blue bra that was lacy and wired and padded. She flicked a smile at him.

"That's 'cause I bought it for you." The way his face changed when she said that was a look she would never forget. Like shock mixed with amusement mixed with the face all kids got on Christmas morning. She grinned at him before nodding at Rose who began to inch her way into the water. She and Kit were both down to their skivvies and were both already shivering. Kit ran over to the nearby rocks and began climbing up the side and standing atop the little diving platform almost every student knew about. Rubbing she arms, she looked down into the chilly waters and hoped for the best.

"No time like the present," she muttered before jumping in.

There were no words to describe how cold that water was. It felt hot, that's how cold it was. Kit gave a scream as she came up for air and latched onto the rock by her.

"Fuck, that's cold!" She was prepared to climb back out if it hadn't been for Rose's laugh. Maybe Kit had a bit too much pride for her own good, but that sound alone made her let go of the rock and tread water a few feet away from Rose. She was shivering so badly she couldn't talk properly, but she glared at Rose as best she could. She would _not_ let her win. Kit reached behind her with clumsy finger and made a dozen or so attempts until she finally unfastened her bra. She held it up and tossed it out of the water, failing by four feet.

"I l-l-like th-that bra," she stuttered. Rose asked if she was ready to give up yet.

"N-n-not a hop-p-pe in hell," Kit said. She couldn't feel her legs or arms as she tread the black waters. She flexed her hands in the hopes of getting some feeling back but it didn't work. Kit watched her cousin who, while didn't look comfortable, was hardly struggling as much as Kit was. It was a losing battle. Kit huffed and scrambled to shore.

"S-ss-crew this." Kit clambered up and wrapped her arms around herself, keeping what little warmth she had left in her and effectively covering her breasts. Her hands shook violently as she pulled the sweater over her head. James caught her hands and helped her with the rest.

"Your lips are blue," he said as she huddled near him for warmth. Rose was getting out of the water now, shivering to a lesser degree but she looked triumphant.

"N-n-newest craze," Kit joked and she stopped dead because she felt the warmth seep back into her blood. It felt like warm honey being poured onto her and she nearly melted onto James.

"Thank Merlin," she muttered casting Rose a grateful look and wondered why she'd never bothered to learn that spell. James hugged her close and they all walked back to the castle together.

"You know, you really do the strangest things sometimes, Kit." he said as he stoked the fire in the common room.

"But it wouldn't be the same if I didn't," she wrapped an arm around his waist and tugged him back until he left the fire and went to snuggle her. She tucked her feet up and put her head against his chest. His chest rumbled with laughter and she felt him nod.

"I suppose," he watched her as she watched the flames. Her skin was still cool to the touch, but she wasn't shivering anymore. Her hand played absently with his shirt and James tried to fight the way his stomach quivered when she did that. She thankfully didn't notice but Sirius did and gave James a wink from over Rose's head as he and Rose walked up to the boys dorms. James could read it easily enough; it meant, more than anything, that Sirius wanted him to distract Kit so he could have some alone time with Rose without worrying about the state of his genitals. James shrugged as if to say, "Nothing I can do," and ran a hand through Kit's hair when she stirred. Kit swatted it away and stumbled up to her feet.

"Sleep," she said while rubbing her eyes.

"You could have slept in my room," James said as she walked around the couch.

"I think I've spent enough nights in someone else's bed to last a lifetime of gossip. Night," She slowly climbed the stairs and it felt like a lifetime ago since she'd spent a night in her own bed. She shucked her damp clothes and left them in a pile before climbing into the bed and drawing the curtains. Tomorrow was Saturday so she didn't need to worry about waking up early. She slid under the covers and sighed as the warm sheets wrapped around her. She was asleep before her head hit the pillow. No one bothered to disturb her to ask where she'd been or whether she was actually dating Potter even though she was engaged to Sirius.

Kit bolted awake and put a hand over her face. She was so dim sometimes! Most of the school had seen her agree to date James. Including the Slytherins. Shit. Kit threw herself back against the pillows and gave a little scream. When would she catch a break? She spun around to lie on her side and tried to go back to sleep. Something brushed against her leg and her first thought was how James had managed to get into the girls' dorm.

"Kit?"

"Rose?"

"What are you doing here?" they asked as together and Kit waved her hand around.

"This is my bed,"

"I thought you would have been with James,"

"I could say the same for you and Sirius." Kit could only make out Rose's head in the darkness, but she felt her shrug. Rose turned and pulled herself deeper into the covers. Kit's brows pulled down as she remembered something and she fumbled around for her wand.

"What are you doing?" Rose mumbled, her face buried in a pillow.

"Rose, I wasn't exactly expecting company," she accioed a shirt and a pair of shorts then went about shuffling into them without getting up. It involved a lot of awkward movements, but eventually Kit had clothes on.

"Oh," Rose said slowly then turned to face Kit in the dark. Kit lit her wand and saw the look on Rose's face.

"What's the matter?"

"I do not want to lose this," she said. She looked down and picked at a corner of Kit's pillow. Kit pulled her cousin into a hug and nodded.

"Neither do I. And we won't let that happen."

"We?" Rose gave a little laugh and pulled back to look at Kit.

"Well, it's pretty obvious I can't get rid of you lot."

"Ha, not a chance." Rose gave her shoulder a squeeze before rolling over. Kit could feel herself drifting off to sleep, thankfully. She was right on the edge, in that moment between sleep and awake where a single movement could tear you from any hope of dreaming.

_Bang_.

And there was the movement. Kit grumbled and stumbled out of the bed to see what had happened. She squinted at the beds and saw that all the curtains were drawn and nothing had fallen over. There was a knock at the window and Kit stomped over to it.

"Who sends post at this hour?" she asked out loud.

"Stop stealing Rose." Sirius said, floating by the window on his broom. In her sleepy daze, Kit didn't really register that he was flying at the top of a tower and what the consequences would be if she pushed him hard enough, only that it would quickly solve the problem.

"Get lost, Sirius."

"I would have thought you dating Prongs would have loosened you up a bit."

"Sirius, she's not here." Kit closed the window but Sirius held it open.

"Liar, she's right there!" Kit turned to see the same sleeping lump she'd left.

"No, she's not. Sirius, keep it in your pants for one night?"

"Just one?" he asked, his smirk visible even in the dark night.

"You're too persistent and annoying for your own good." She told him plainly.

"We need to talk." The sudden seriousness in his voice made Kit stop considering to toss him off of the broom. "As your fiance, I'm not sure I like the idea of you dating James." He ducked out of the way when Kit lunged at him and flew back to safety.

"Never marry him. Ever. I'll kill you both if you do." Kit climbed back into bed after warning her cousin and waited for a half a second for something else to happen before falling asleep. She didn't even hear her cousin agree to her warning as she fell into unconsciousness.

* * *

"Does it seem like we have more breaks than actual school?" Sirius asked as they rode the train up to Rose's cabin. It was a muggle train, which had been an ordeal to get onto. Rose knew what to do, since she'd done it before, but Sirius, Remus, James, Kit and Peter were left to stare at the ticket counter like it was written in Latin. Which probably would have been easier to understand than the thing before them.

"What's a pound?" Peter asked Rose as he looked down at the paper in his hands.

"Who makes money out of paper?" Sirius wondered out loud as they walked through the station. Rose had been smiling the whole time, enjoying their confusion but couldn't help it when they stopped at the gates. They were big revolving doors made of thick metal bars. The five students stared at it while Rose fought to breathe.

"What the hell is this?" Kit walked up to it and tried to push on one part. It didn't move, it didn't even squeak. She took a step back and fixed the contraption with a glare, as if she could will it to work. She took a breath and pushed against it with all her might. James, Remus, Peter and Sirius looked at her efforts and wondered what she was doing wrong.

"Kit," Rose pried her cousin's hands off of the metal bars and made her take a step to the left. Giving her a little push, Kit walked through the revolving doors and huffed once she was on the other side.

"I would have gotten it eventually," she muttered and Rose just patted her on the head.

"I'm sure you would have." Rose led the others through it and they waited on the platform for their train.

"It's weird not having to walk through a wall," Peter said as he watched the people mill around. He held onto his ticket like it was his life line and they all looked a bit uncomfortable. Rose was leaning against one of the posts and sipping from a hot chocolate she'd bought at one of the vending machines. Merlin, watching their faces as the cup dropped down and filled with hot chocolate had been priceless. They were all convinced that it was magic. There was a sudden gust of wind down the platform and Rose took a step closer to the edge. Sirius reached out and pulled her back as the massive train hurtled down the line. Rose laughed and pulled everyone onto the train, trying to keep an eye on them as dozens of people vied for a good seat.

"Remus?" she called when it became obvious they were missing someone. He emerged from the second level, looking a bit dishevelled.

"I just followed the crowd," he said, stunned as he sat down with the rest of them. Rose fussed over him until Sirius got jealous and pulled her into his lap. James found a paper in the seat behind them and unfolded it. His brow crumpled suddenly and his stared at the lines on the page.

"Okay, this isn't even English," he said, tossing the paper to one side.

"James, that's because we're in Russia." Kit said slowly.

"All this muggle stuff just blends together after a while," he said. Kit had to agree with him there. After getting off the Hogwarts express, Rose had insisted they take muggle transportation all the way. She said something about the beautiful countryside. Kit couldn't take the time to admire it since James' hands were being very distracting along her waist. She squirmed in her seat and tried to ignore the way Rose was smiling at the pair.

"Могу ли я получить что-нибудь для вас?" A uniformed man asked if he could get anything for them, a pad of paper in his hands. Kit felt around her pockets and found she had some left over muggle money.

"Есть ли у вас меню? Для продуктов питания?" Kit said, her rusty Russian a bit evident. She'd asked for a menu but it took the man a moment to get it.

"Yes. I have a menu," the man said in accented English. Kit pouted a bit that her Russian had become so bad. The man smiled at her.

"Is not so bad," he said after catching her look. He handed her the menu and looked over the group. "You are not all from Russia?"

"How'd you guess?" Kit asked.

"Your friend looks confused." The man nodded at James who stopped looking confused only so he could glare at the man. "But you and she are from here." He nodded to Rose, who nodded back.

"I haven't been back in a while, if you couldn't already tell." Kit joked.

"We are glad to have you back." He said with a grin. "I am Damon."

"Katherine," Kit held her hand out and shook his. Damon said he'd be back in a short while to take their order. Kit looked over the menu, which was in Russian, and started to pick some things out.

"I don't like him," James said after a moment. The whole compartment hooted with laughter. It took the littlest thing to make James jealous. Kit shook her head as she perused the dessert section.

"He was just being friendly."

"A little too friendly, if you ask me."

"James. Do you want anything?" she waved the menu around and asked the group. Rose took it and looked through with Sirius and Remus. Peter just asked for a tea. Kit took the menu back and asked James for the last time if he wanted anything.

"I'm fine," he said as he stared out the window. Kit looked at him, waiting for him to say something else, but he just watched the landscape rush by.

"Whatever," Kit mumbled and looked up to see Damon walking back to them.

"Ready?" he asked and poised his pen at the ready.

"Yes. Two teas,"

"Cream and sugar?"

"Yes, please. A coffee and whatever this is." She pointed at something on the menu. "I could only recognize chocolate and that's good enough for me."

"That's chocolate truffles. Very good," Damon wrote it down and took the menu. Once he left, Kit and the others pooled their money. It looked like there was enough and when Damon returned Kit handed him what they had out.

"Сдачи не надо." Kit told him to keep the change and laughed when his brows rose at how much was there.

"Thank you," he set the cups out and handed a coffee to Rose, a tea each to Kit and Peter and put the truffles in the middle. He bent as he set the truffles down at whispered to Kit, "Я думаю, ваш друг не любит меня гораздо," he said that he didn't think her friend liked him very much and Kit waved a hand.

"Он не хотел оставаться за бортом." Kit patted James' arm and grinned at him. She told Damon that he didn't like to be left out and Damon smiled.

"Или он ревнует," Damon said he might have been jealous and Kit laughed.

"Maybe a bit." Kit poured a dollop of cream into her tea and swirled it around.

"Then I will leave," Damon smiled at the group before walking off. Rose looked like she'd been enjoying herself, judging by the grin she was trying to hide behind her coffee cup. Kit stuck her tongue out at Rose before snuggling up to James. He didn't react, just stared out the window.

"Prongs," she said and his eyes just flickered over to her. Kit huffed and put her tea down. "What?"

"Nothing,"

"James, don't be a prat."

"Oh, so now I'm a prat?"

"Come on," Kit stood and took his hand. She wasn't going to have this in front of the guys. "James," he didn't budge and stared her down. "Alright, fine. We'll do this here. Why are you angry?"

"If you'd rather go off with Damon, don't let me stop you."

"Excuse me?"

"Oh, come on! You two were flirting!" James hissed.

"I was being nice."

"Sure," James scoffed.

"James, believe me when I say I don't know the first thing about flirting."

"Sure you don't." James said, but looked up when Rose said that it was true. Kit didn't recognize flirting short of being pushed up against a wall and snogged.

"Lord, James, it's like talking to a brick wall! I was being friendly, that's all." She'd just been nice to the guy. Sure, he was cute, but she was dating James. "I'm dating you, aren't I?"

"Like that's ever stopped people before. Look at Eric," James mumbled. Kit tried to ignore the pang that went through her when he said that. She was still pissed at him for cheating on her, but it still hurt like hell to think about. There was a moment of stunned silence and Kit could see the flicker of regret in his eyes. Not it that stayed there for long.

"I'll see you guys when we get to the station." Kit stomped off and went up to the second level. The whole place was nearly deserted and Kit found a seat in the back corner. She pulled her feet up and wrapped her arms around her knees. Men! They were so dim! And why he he have to mention Eric? Kit pressed her forehead against the glass and let her breath fog it up.

"Katherine?" Kit looked up to see Rose walking towards her.

"Why did I agree to date him?" Kit asked, anger lacing into her words.

"Because you wanted me to lose ten galleons," Rose said with a small smile as she sat beside Kit.

"Если это поможет, я его ударил. Несколько раз." Kit looked out the window when Rose said she'd hit him multiple times.

"Good," Kit muttered before sighing. "I just don't get it. He goes on about knowing me for so long and knowing who I am, but he doesn't even realize I'm nearly blind when it comes to romance."

"Love is blind. And James is stupid, idiot boy." Rose put an hand on Kit's shoulder and gave it a squeeze.

"Got that right," Kit said and gave a sigh. "I'll just meet you guys on the platform, okay? I want to, you know..."

"Brood?" Rose offered.

"Something like that," Kit watched her cousin walk off and turn back to give Kit a little smile before she went down the stairs. Kit pushed herself deeper into the plush seat and let she eyes slide shut. She didn't know if she'd expected it to be easy or what, but dating James was different than just being friends with him. There were a whole new list of rules and regulations that Kit had no idea about. They weren't friends anymore, it was something more than that. But she didn't want that; she wanted things to be like they were before. Before Eric, before the Dark Lord, before everything. She just wanted things to be uncomplicated and normal. Most of all, she didn't want James acting like a prat the whole time.

* * *

**Hey guys! I know it's been a long time since I updated, but I'm planning on getting a lot of chapters up tonight. And Bridge and I have finally gotten to the good part! It won't be for a few chapters, but we've been waiting to write it since we started planning this fic **

**Peace. Love. Potter**

**Dahlia**


	21. Chapter 21

Kit stood just inside the cabin and watched as Rose ran at the guy had seemingly broken into their vacation spot. And instead of attacking him or anything productive, she hugged him. Kit frowned at the guy and tried to place him.

"Josef! Where have you been? I have been worried sick! What happened?" Rose squealed when he picked her up and twirled her around. Josef Krum, how could Kit have forgotten. Rose wrote about him often enough, but she had no idea he planned on spending the break with them. Wouldn't this be interesting, she thought when she saw the way Sirius was glowering at him. Not that Rose noticed, she was fussing over Josef.

"Katherine," Josef said and shook her hand. "It has been a very long time." Josef was a great Quidditch player, which Kit admired but she hardly knew anything about him. She shook his hand and nodded at Rose.

"Got some catching up to do?" she asked.

"A few months worth," He smiled and went back to Rose and they settled down on the worn couches. Kit picked her bags up and walked around the cabin. She didn't remember any of it although she thought she'd been there as a child. She poked her head into the room and saw that they were well furnished, if a little dated. Each room had a large bed and a dresser. There were only four bedrooms, though. Kit picked one at random and tossed her bag onto the bed. She pulled out a pair of her dad's socks. The one's that were way too big but too warm to give up. Kit kicked her shoes off and pulled them on. The cabin was still cold despite the sun outside. A fire hadn't been started in the fireplace so the wood walls and floors clung to the chill of winter. As Kit pulled them on, she had a sudden vision of her father twisting in agony in some room, just so she'd be safe. She stopped and tried to stop the sharp pain that wound through her chest.

"Kit?" Remus knocked on the open door. "You okay?" He came to sit beside her and the bed creaked as he sat.

"Yeah, just, you know, worried."

"You heard what Rose said, this place is locked up tight. There are tons of wards protecting us."

"Then how did Josef get in?" Kit wondered and dread went through her. She bolted up and whipped her wand out, running back into the living room.

"Rose!" Kit screamed and watched as all hell broke loose. Josef was pulling Rose out the door while men piled into the house. She recognized some of them from her childhood and the way Rose's face contorted meant she knew them as well. Kit fired a hex at Josef who pulled Rose in front of him to take it. Wands were flying around, things were begin destroyed but Kit wouldn't give up. The others had her back now, but Rose unconscious in Josef's arms, completely helpless.

"Get the cousin!" Josef instructed and tried to pull Rose out.

"NO!" Kit pushed through the wall of Death Eaters, cursing anyone she saw. One of the men grabbed her arm and held her close. She saw his fist pull back and she jammed her wand into his throat. He coughed and wheezed, dropping to his knees in front of her. Kicking him down, Kit saw the door close. "ROSE!" Kit pushed harder now, ignoring the stinging in her side and the spells being thrown at her. A slicing charm caught the side of her face, and another sliced the back of her legs. She could see one waiting for her by the door. He smirked when she made eye contact with him and he raised his wand. Kit knew what word was coming before he opened his mouth.

"_Cruic-" _James sent him flying with a spell and ran at him to finish the job. Kit threw herself against the door and landed heavily on her hands on the gravel path. She saw Josef with Rose a few feet ahead, trying to make it to some unseen barrier before he could Apparate.

"Josef!" Kit left a trail of blood on the pristine rocks as she walked over to him. He held Rose close but there was something missing. He wasn't looking to harm anyone.

"Don't. Josef, I don't know what you've been told, but this won't help." Kit told him. She felt a thick trickle of blood from her temple and swayed.

"They have Maria!" he screamed, his eyes frantic. The flickered all over the place, back to the house, at the girl in his arms, back to the bleeding mess Kit had become.

Kit didn't care who Maria was and she sure didn't think that Maria was even alive. "Josef, you've heard the stories." Kit gulped down whatever was stuck in her throat and took another step towards him. "You heard what I did to the Blacks. I'm the one you want." She took another step, her wand clutched in her right hand.

"H-he wants you both."

"At some point, I'm sure. But what he wants now is power. I have that. Rose, she can't, she doesn't have the gut for it. Imagine it, Josef. The glory you'd get when they find out you caught me. You'll be a hero, a god among men. Just let her go."

"That's not true. You're just like her. You can't kill."

"I already have. Two of your men are already dead." It was a bluff, but she could see the hope light up in his eyes. "Let her go, Josef," Kit could feel herself sway, she could start to feel her legs shake. If he didn't agree to it soon, they'd both be screwed. Kit forced herself to take another step. She saw his eyes look over her shoulder and widen but when she turned to look, all she saw was the flash of a spell and then nothing. She felt her legs leave the ground and the awful crunch of landing on bone. Kit couldn't see anything, she couldn't feel anything. She could hear murky sounds, distorted by the blood loss. There was a twisted scream and a gurgle and Kit tried to fight her way to consciousness to make sure Rose was okay. But she couldn't find the strength to move or even open her eyes. She heard the crunch of gravel then a whoosh of something being pulled through the air. Pain blossomed in her stomach, sending a bolt up her side. Kit jerked awake, her eyes flying open. The world was doused in a red haze, her eyes clouded by the blood still seeping from her temple.

"Haven't seen you in a while," Natalya grabbed a handful of her hair and pulled her up. "I've heard you've got quite a dark streak in you. Pity I never got a chance to see it." She trailed her wand through the thick, clotted blood on her cheek, making Kit wince.

"Maybe if you come to your sense, you can use it on your traitor friends." She frowned back at the cabin and Kit could see smoke swirling up from it. "They put up such a good fight," Natalya laughed when Kit tried to thrash around, but could only manage a little twitch.

"Stop playing around. Just get them to the Dark Lord." Josef said, his voice verging on panic.

"In due time, Josef. You have to learn to enjoy the process," She surveyed Kit before throwing her back down. Kit slammed her eyes shut and bit down on her lip to stop from screaming out. She could taste blood in her mouth, she could feel it on her tongue. She opened her eyes to see Natalya crumple not a foot from her. Four pairs of feet ran past and a moment later someone was shaking her.

"Kit? Katherine?" the person asked frantically. "Someone get help!"

"Kit mom's an Auror," someone else said and ran back to the house.

"Kit? Can you hear me? Oh, god." He put a hand on her cheek and tried to calm her down. Kit felt like screaming. The Death Eaters were gone now, so why hadn't the pain stopped? Where was Rose? Was she okay?

"Remus!" Kit heard a familiar voice shout and the crunch of someone coming up the gravel. They gave instructions to everyone and she saw feet go past, rushing into the house. Someone put a hand under her back and another under her knees. Unable to hold back, Kit screamed, the blinding, sharp pain shooting through her whole body.

"I know, Kit. I know. Just hold on, please. Kit, just hold on." The person carried her inside, cringing at her silent screams. Kit's vision blurred again, this time from tears that made clear tracks over her bloodied face.

"Put her on the bed."

"Dad?" Kit croaked. Her back arched off the bed when they put her down.

"Honey, calm down. I know you're in pain, but you need to stay still." Luka brushed a hand across her brow and reached for his case.

"It hurts," Kit moaned, trying to stay still and not managing it. She writhed on the sheets, every move causing another shock of pain. But when she stayed still she could feel the numbness that she was scared of and the darkness pulled at the edges of her vision. Things shifted in and out of focus, her hearing going with it.

"Drink this," Luka pressed a vial to her lips. She gagged on it and coughed, a spray of blood landing on the floor.

"Katherine, you're scared. You're making this worse." Luka's voice was the assuring, calm one he used at work, but on the inside he was anything but calm. The threat the Dark Lord was sending them was obvious. They knew where to find them at any time. Kit was coughing up blood.

"Kit, drink it." He held the vial to her lips and watched to make sure she swallowed. She looked up at him, her face covered in blood and cuts, but beneath all of that Luka could see the raw fear in her eyes. The way she latched onto James' hand made it evident things were much worse than they looked. Kit suddenly screamed, her whole body arching.

"Do something!" James shouted at Luka. Kit's hand went white, she was holding onto James' so tightly. She sobbed and thrashed around as the potion worked into her system. It was fast acting, but Kit had to endure two agonizing minutes as the potion made it to her heart. Her screaming stopped and her whole body went limp. James looked down at her, unable to speak.

"She's alive. Barely." Luka said professionally. "The potion slowed her heart. It means she won't feel pain while I work."

"She'll wake up?" James managed to ask in a small voice.

"Eventually,"

* * *

The days went by slowly for everyone. There was lots to do; Tori had to take things up with the Ministry about the attack, Luka had to make sure everyone was okay. Thankfully, the fight had been with young witches and wizard and therefore the damage didn't run a deeply. Young fights knew how to cause violent momentary pain. Experienced ones could make it last for weeks. Natalya had more experience than Luka had imagined. The others were sore and scratched, Rose was inconsolable, but his focus was his daughter. Four days and she hadn't so much as stirred. The potion had worn off only an hour after it'd been administered, but Kit still hadn't woken. Someone was always by her side, watching her for any signs. It was like watching the dead without the comfort that they no longer felt pain.

Luka was forced to witness it, but his wife refused to see her daughter in such a state. The fact that it might be the last time she saw her daughter went unsaid. He stood with Tori in the empty bedroom and watched the wilderness moved around outside the window.

"This is too much, Tori. I don't want her to give in but if it would save her this pain..."

"Katherine would never choose the less painful route, regardless. Luka," she turned him to look her in the eye. "We cannot do anything. If we try to leave, Kit will be left an orphan. We have no options."

* * *

Rose spent her time trying to be there for everyone else. Luka needed a hand treating everyone's wounds, Tori needed help cooking the meal, and the others needed someone to talk to, to worry to. Rose smiled so often she felt as if her face might crack at any moment. With the stress that was working beneath the calm exterior, it just might if things didn't look up soon. What if Kit never woke up? What if she had to face the Dark Lord without her cousin? How would she do it? How would any of them cope with having to bury someone so young and loved? But the one thing that plagued Rose's mind the most was how Kit was willing to risk her life for Rose's. How ready she was to endure torture of whatever else He could think of just to be sure Rose was safe. But Rose couldn't do anything to repay her. Not while she lied half-dead on a bed, mind lost somewhere else. All she could do was be there when she finally woke up. Rose refused to think _if_. Kit was a strong girl, something like this couldn't defeat her. Like Kit always said, you can move on from the physical.

It made Rose think of how Kit held out on dating James just to make Rose lose a bet. It felt like Kit was holding out to make them sick with worry. If that was the case Rose might just kill Kit herself.

* * *

She could see him, she could see the wicked grin on his face, the way his dark eyes watched her as she writhed. She could see every feature in with perfect clarity, a sight that would haunt her for years. She'd never seen his face before, but she knew who was standing before her. She saw a landscape around her, familiar but only fleetingly so. The name would strike her but be whisked away a moment let. She was dazed as she crawled along the cement.

"I'll kill you," she croaked, her throat raw from screaming.

"Oh, I think Natalya already took care of that," he calmly inspected his wand, not even looking at the crawling mess at his feet.

"Let them go. I'll do anything," she could see them, fighting against the arms that held them back. They called for her to stop, but he was already laughing.

"Anything?" he nodded to someone and a boy was standing in front of her. No more than ten, he was shaking and sobbing. He pushed the boy to her and nodded.

"Nothing but a mudblood," he said dryly. He saw her horror and shook his head. "You said anything. But if you can't..." He spun and pointed his wand at one of them. "_Avada Kedavra!"_ The green flash blinded her and left behind the familiar body of her childhood friend. She gave a choked sob but didn't move to the boy. He smiled gleefully and chose another one of her dearest friends. The body of who was going to be the Best Man at the wedding was lying at her feet, lifeless eyes staring up at her. A boy screamed in horror and pressed himself against her leg.

"Make a choice!" He roared and grabbed the one person she couldn't bear to see killed.

She tried to move, to do something, but the boy held her in place, looking up at her with big brown eyes. She saw the flash of green and couldn't hold back.

When Kit woke, it wasn't with a twitch or a moan, it was with a full-bodied, blood curdling scream. She sat bolt up, pain darting through her sides and screamed again and again. She couldn't get it out; the flash then the body lying at her feet. Candles were lit and people rushed in, fussing over her, trying to get her to lie back down, but she didn't. She was shaking and her sobs increased when he came in. For a moment, standing in the doorway Kit thought he was a ghost, that she hadn't been dreaming. But he came to her and wrapped his arms around her. Unable to move her left arm, Kit held him close with her right, grabbing a handful of his shirt and keeping him there.

"You're alive. You're alive," she said over and over, sobbing into his shoulder. James held her head, running a comforting hand through her hair and whispered sweet things to her.

"Kit, it's okay. I'm here. It's okay," James rocked her gently and nodded at the others to leave. Luka left last with an anxious look at his daughter. James moved Kit gently to lie down against him. Tears fell steadily from her eyes but James wiped them away and put a hand on her cheek.

"James," Kit said miserably.

"Kit, you don't have to talk about it. You're better now. You'll get better." James said as he pressed a kiss against her temple. He carefully wrapped his arms around her as she began to shake. He ignored her apologizes and rubbed her back until she was asleep. Her face was nestled against his chest, but he could see the wound on her temple and the nasty ones on her legs. But he wasn't worried about those, what worried him the most was the haunted look in her eye when she saw him in the doorway. When she looked at him before falling asleep, there had been a frantic worry in her eyes. He'd been sick with worry when she'd been asleep, but the same concern tugged at him now. He wanted to know what had upset her so much, if only to make sure it never bothered her again.

* * *

When Kit woke up she was alone. She felt around the bed and when she couldn't feel James anywhere, her breathing turned frantic. Why wasn't he there? What had happened? Kit forced her eyes open and squinted against the bright sun. Her body ached everywhere when she sat still but it went through her like lightning. She bit back the moan that threatened to burst through her lungs as she pushed herself off of the bed. The weight on her feet forced her to remember that her calves had been sliced open. She bent her head and forced one foot in front of the other until she was out of her room. While she'd been half-dead her father must have gotten rid of her ruined clothes. She was wearing a loose cotton shirt and a pair of sweat pants that had to belong to James. But it felt like sandpaper across her lacerated muscles. The cotton rubbed against a wound on her shoulder she hadn't realized she'd had. Kit's left arm was wrapped up in bandages and held against her body in a sling.

"Is there tea?" she asked as she inched into the kitchen. Remus spun to face her and gathered her into a hug. She winced but smiled at him. He had his sleeves rolled up as he made scrambled eggs for lunch. Kit saw the burn that ran the length of his forearm.

"Moony!" Kit couldn't reach out and grab his arm as quickly as she used to, but she held it and sighed. "I'm sorry,"

"Not your fault," he said with a smile. Kit saw Peter smiling just as much as Remus was and sat down wearily.

"Why is everyone so happy? We were just attacked." She looked at the plate of eggs Remus placed in front of her and picked at it gingerly.

Remus took a seat across from her and looked at her frankly. "Kit, we all thought you were going to die. Seeing you awake is more than a relief to all of us."

Kit didn't know what to say. She was embarrassed; they'd be attacked because of her and they'd all be hurt because of her. "How long was I out for?"

"Four days,"

"Wow," Kit breathed and shook her head. She still felt muggy and all kinds of painful but he was right, she was alive and so were all her friends and family. But before she could say anything else, she was being tackled by her cousin.

"You stupid, stupid girl! If that ever happens again, you let them take me! Never do that again! Never!"

"Ow!" Kit moaned as the blonde went about fussing about something. Rose jumped back and clamped her hands down. Kit could see her lip trembling and threat of tears.

"I am sorry. Are you alright? I am sorry. Please do not be angry with me. I am sorry." Rose shook her head and took another step back. Kit watched as Rose's face crumpled and an onslaught of tears began.

"You listen to me. It took me ten minutes to get down that hall, don't make me get up again." Kit held her arms open and hoped she could keep her own act together. Rose gave a wobbly laugh and hugged her gently.

"What part of you is not covered with bandages?" Rose asked with a shaky laugh. Kit frowned and pulled the neck of her shirt out. Oh, there were bandages there. She went to shrug but found that hurt a bit too much.

"None," Kit said with as close to a shrug as she could get which was lifting her right shoulder. She really hoped this pain wouldn't last forever and until it went away she had potions on hand. Rose kissed the top of her head and sat down beside her.

"Is it safe to come out?" Kit heard Sirius ask, his arm waving just outside his door. Why wouldn't it be safe? Kit wondered as she picked at her eggs.

"You know, they'd do a lot more good if you ate them," Remus whispered to her.

"Not hungry," but she smiled at him.

Rose looked at Kit and said, "I will be right back." She left to go speak with Sirius and Kit watched as Rose gave him a little push back into the room.

"What's with them?" Kit asked Peter. He looked around anxiously and shook his head.

"Nothing,"

"You need to learn to be a better liar." Kit said. But when it became obvious she wasn't going to find out, she looked around for something else. "Where's James?"

"He went down to the town with your parents to get food and such. I think your dad wanted something from the muggle store for a potion." Before Kit could ask when they'd be back or when they'd left, Sirius was being placed Rose had recently left.

"Pads!" Kit went to hug him but stopped at the sharp pain up her side.

"I get it, hug me when it doesn't hurt so much." He seemed giddy for some reason. Kit immediately smiled with him. It was nice to see him happy and not brooding. Kit nodded at Rose for the tea and took a deep sip. It was hot, but her throat itched for something to soothe it. She reached for the sugar and put a few spoonfuls in. Rose put a hand on Sirius's shoulder which Kit didn't notice because Peter was swiping her wand off of the table and Remus was high-tailing out of the kitchen.

"What's going on?" Kit asked, looking up from her tea. She frowned at Rose and saw her hand encased in Sirius's. "That's not fair," Kit told them, a whine evident in her voice.

"Huh?" Sirius asked intelligently.

"I can't very well hurt either of you. This isn't fair." Kit wanted very badly to stand up and throttle Sirius until he realized that if he ever treated her cousin badly, she'd not only dismember him but she'd rip him apart piece by piece. The grip she had on the mug went white and she took a deep breath.

"Kit, remember, you are hurt," Rose began to say, trying to calm her down. But Kit grabbed onto the front of Sirius's shirt with her right hand and pulled herself up.

"You listen to me. You do anything untoward to my cousin, I'll hurt you. You push anything on her, I'll hurt you. You even think about another girl, I'll throw you in the lake. Do I make myself clear?"

Sirius looked at the girl who'd been through hell and back to protect her cousin and nodded. "Crystal."

"I don't want to hear about how great the sex was-"

"Katherine!" Rose said indignantly but Kit just did a half shrug again.

"-and I don't want to hear about any broom closet escapades." Kit glared down at him until he nodded and she gave a single nod back.

"Good." She lowered herself gingerly back into the chair and took a sip of her tea.

"Is she unconscious?" Remus asked as he poked his head out from the hall. He spotted Kit sitting, calmly drinking her tea and walked over hesitantly. "You're taking this awfully well,"

"I can't do much in my current condition. Besides," she looked out the from window and saw James and her parents walk up the gravel path, "there are more important things at the moment."

Luka pushed open the door, his arms full with grocery bags and his hands full of muggle change. He set everything down on the coffee table that had a long scorch mark across the top and told the others to put their stuff there as well. He looked up into the kitchen and froze.

"Katherine!" He ran over and immediately became a Healer instead of a father. "Why are you out of bed? You'll upset the dressings. How are you feeling?" he pressed a hand to her brow and checked the bandage on her temple.

"You're warm." He said and told her to get right back to bed.

"Dad, I've been in bed for five days now."

"You don't need to remind me. And I won't have you spending even more time there if you manage to get yourself even more hurt. Now, off to bed."

"I got here fine, I'll be alright, dad."

Luka met her stare with a steady one of his own, a brow raised. "Oh, and how long did it take you to get from the room to here?"

Kit looked down at her hand and chewed her lip. "A while,"

"Hm, and how much did it hurt?" Luka crossed his arms when she didn't reply and bent to look her in the eye. "You need rest, whether you want it or not. Bed." Kit groaned and laboriously pushed herself up from the table.

"Here," James ran over and put one of her arms around his neck. He carried most of her weight as they hobbled down the hall. He helped her lie back in the same bed and sat beside her.

"I'm sorry," he said suddenly. Kit looked up at him and took his hand.

"Why?"

"Everything I said on the train. It...it was stupid. I didn't mean any of it." Kit ran a hand along his arm to soothe him, but kept going. "And I just kept thinking, 'what if this is it? What if everything goes wrong and the last thing you remember is me acting like a plonker." He held onto her hand tightly and looked away.

"James," Kit pulled her hand out of his and touched his cheek. "Whatever was said on the way here was and still is the farthest thing from my mind." She pulled on his shirt and made him lean down to her level.

"I'm so happy you're alive," he said.

"Me, too," Kit smiled before reaching to kiss him. He cupped her cheek and pulled himself closer, savouring in the feeling of her, very much alive beneath his hands. Never breaking contact with her, he moved to lie on the bed with her. He leant over her, his arms bearing all the weight and lowered his head back down. Kit could only use one hand, but she let that hand play with his hair and trail down his back.

"I can't wait for these bandages to be off," James said against her lips as his hand ran up her leg past the scratches on her legs and gently traced the ones that wrapped around her torso. His lips brushed along her unscathed temple and kissed her forehead and cheek before finding her lips again. He brushed the hair away from her face and pressed his cheek against hers.

"Never scare me like that again." He told her and felt her nod.

"James?" she mumbled.

"Yeah?"

"I'm tired." James laughed quietly at her and removed himself from the bed.

"I'll bring you some food later." He bent and kissed her forehead. She reached out and pressed a final kiss to his lips then rolled over and closed her eyes.

* * *

**I hope you liked this chapter. I'd really like to hear any feedback from you guys, what you think of Kit and such. I'm not going to hold my story hostage until I get reviews, but I would really like to hear from you. It's just a simple click and a few words, I promise.**

**Dahlia**


	22. Chapter 22

It was the same man, the same features, same twisted grin. The boy was there too. The little boy with the big brown eyes that tugged at something inside of Kit. Her legs burned and the boy wailed as she pulled him through the reeds. His voice was taunting them, laughing at her attempts to make it through unharmed. The boy tripped and Kit scooped him up. He was younger in this dream, a mere toddler who could barely walk on his own. Kit cradled him close to her chest and ran away from the voice.

"Kit?" someone called her name and she knew who it belonged to. She wanted to yell at him to go away, tell him that it was too dangerous but she was frozen. The boy sensed something and started screeching and scratching at Kit. She held him tighter to her chest and ran to where she'd heard James. He stood there, his back to her, calling out her name. He didn't see Him step out from the reeds. Kit screamed but had no voice as the wand pointed at James and the green light flashed by. She usually woke by now, but she was forced to watch his body fall limply onto the ground. Her grip on the boy went slack and he ran to James. Kit watched in horror as He raised his wand again at the boy.

Kit felt something get wretched from her chest, like someone trying to pull her heart out. Her legs kicked and thrashed, arms reaching out for a child that wasn't there. Her eyes snapped open and she saw the canopy above her. Her breath shuddered out of her lungs as she tried to force the image from her mind. It was a month after the attack and she still had the nightmares about the nameless boy and the Dark Lord picking off her friends one by one. She was scared. She woke up every night drenched in a cold sweat. She'd stopped screaming now, but the shadows still looked too dark, too familiar some mornings.

A month had gone by and the physical wounds had almost healed. There were two stiff, silver scars across each of her legs. Her left shoulder and arm had a smattering of little scars and scratches. The one that had faded the most was the C-shaped one that ran from her right temple to just below her eye. It was almost invisible now and certainly wouldn't catch any attention if her eyes stayed as hollow and haunted as they currently looked. Kit's toes curled up when they touched the cool floor and she padded over to the bathroom. Flicking the hot water on to full blast, she stepped into the scalding water and sighed. It was ritual now, every morning she would stay in the steamy bathroom until she knew she could face the school again without fear. Some days she could make it to class on time, others it took her until the first break to pull herself together.

She'd been doing really well the last two weeks. She'd made it to all her classes without fail, but today she could feel it. Her hands were still shaking and she couldn't stop them. The boy's cries rang in her head and she could feel echoes of pain she hadn't felt in a month. Seeing him die felt like a piece of her was being ripped from her. Like a bit of her soul went with him. She didn't know who he was, only that she had a need to protect the young figment of her mind. Kit slid down the wall of the shower, crying under the sound of the rushing water. She wrapped her arms around herself and tried to stop remembering. Some days, some blissful days, she couldn't remember a thing about the nightmares, but others every detail played in vivid focus in her mind.

Today, she couldn't get the image of James' face as he realized what would happen. The way he body fell and crumpled to the ground played and played again until Kit knew exactly how each piece of clothing folded as he went down. She wondered if He knew what she was going through, if He was enjoying it.

"Katherine?" there was a knock at the door and she heard Lily asked for her. She didn't have the strength or the will to move or even speak, but Lily didn't need that.

"I know you're in there. Come on," Lily gingerly pushed open the door and found Kit sitting in the shower. Grabbing a towel, she turned the water off and wrapped Kit up. She sat Kit down on her bed and crouched in front of her.

"I have no idea what happened over break and I have a feeling I don't want to, but I hate seeing you like this." Lily hadn't exactly taken a immediate liking to Kit, but she couldn't stand to see anyone like this. "If you've been having nightmares, go see Madame Pomfrey about getting a sleeping potion. I'll go with you," Lily gave her a smile that faltered when Kit didn't move. "Come on," Lily pulled her up and instructed her to get dressed. Kit did so and walked beside Lily numbly as they went down to the Hospital Wing.

"Madame Pomfry? Kit needs a sleeping potion. Dreamless is most important." Poppy looked over Kit and frowned before turning back to her cupboard.

"Here, take this. A spoonful each night." Kit nodded and slid the vial into her bag. They walked towards the Great Hall together and caught sight of James coming to them. He smiled at her and Lily, his glasses slipping down his nose. All Kit could see was him falling, that look of dreaded surprise on his face. She felt sick.

"I have to go," she said before running into the nearest washroom. James watched her go before turning to Lily.

"Bad night?" He asked and Lily nodded solemnly.

"I don't know what happened but today it hit her really hard."

"I thought it would easier now that she's healed, but this is worse than when she was hurt," James said mostly to himself. Lily stopped him before they entered the Great Hall.

"What happened?"

"We were attacked at a cabin. Death Eaters came for Rose and Kit. Kit," he looked back to the bathroom she'd rushed to, "Kit had it bad. She was out for four days. Something happened while she was out, something none of us can figure out." James sighed and put his forehead against the wall. He hadn't been sleeping well either, but he hadn't been spooked awake by nightmares; he'd been lying in bed, listening to the sound of Kit thrash around in her sleep.

"It's getting hard for all of us," James said finally, heaving his chest up with a sigh.

"You look like you need a coffee," Lily said and she led him into the Great Hall.

* * *

Kit emptied what little she had in her stomach out and sat back against the stone wall, staring down at her hands. The washrooms were abandoned at this time of the day, so she had the peace she needed. She stood and splashed her face with water until she felt a bit more human. Putting a hand on either side of the sink, Kit sighed and wished for the nightmares to stop. She'd give anything to be able to sleep through the night, to never have to see her friends die in front of her.

"I could help you." Kit jumped and spun to see Severus leaning against the wall she'd just been sitting against.

"I don't want your help," she said as she wiped a bead of water from her cheek.

"I think you might."

"Back off, Snivellus." He winced but caught her arm. "I'm serious. The last time I got friendly with a Slytherin, it got me in a heap of trouble."

"I'm not interested in bringing you to the Dark Lord."

"You shouldn't be interested in me. Period."

"Kit," she stopped walking and turned to face him. She stood there, out of arm's reach and waited. "Tomorrow, when you realize that potion won't work, I'll be here." He brushed his limp hair back and fixed his fathomless eyes on her. "It's an offer." He left as abruptly as he'd come in and left Kit to wonder at what he'd said. Well, sneer actually and never consider it. She shook her head and walked into the Great Hall. She felt better than she thought she would have. She wasn't peachy just yet but the terrors were a bit further from her mind.

* * *

The time had come. Kit watched as Rose got settle in her dorm. Dumbledore had given her the extra bed and said she was to stay there as long as she needed. At first she'd been confused, but she was more than happy to welcome her in. Maybe she just needed some company. Kit nodded at Rose as she walked across to the boys' dorms and knocked on the door.

"Hey," James answered it and settled against the door frame. "Do you think it'll work?" James asked about both the potion and having Rose nearby.

"I hope," Kit said slowly. James leant in and kissed her softly, his hand holding her lower back.

"Me, too." James said against her lips. Giving them a final peck, they wished each other goodnight and Kit went to brave the night ahead. She pulled the vial from her bag and a spoon she'd taken from dinner.

It tasted worse than foul, but as Kit pulled the covers around her and bid a drowsy goodnight to Rose, she could feel her mind slip into dark nothingness. She felt like she was floating.

There was nothing but darkness around her. There was no face, no twisted smile. Her heart didn't hammer in her chest to the point Kit thought it would bruise her ribs. In her dream, she smiled into the darkness, her hands reaching out and brushing along sweet nothing. The boy was nowhere to be seen but that didn't bring the relief she'd hoped it would. Instead, she found herself calling for him by a name she'd never heard before but it came from her lips easily. But he never called back, there was nothing around her. The darkness grew palpable and heavy around her. She caught a glimpse of him running off. He was older this time. Nearly her age.

He looked like...

Kit ran after him, chasing him through the darkness that seemed to push her on. She whimpered, cried at him to stop running, that something wasn't right but he kept going. He stopped suddenly and whipped out his wand. Kit ran up to him and grabbed his shoulder.

"STOP! Don't, please!" She begged him, tugging on his arm, but it was too late, she could see Him coming. Dark robes billowing around him, His face so dark that Kit caught herself wishing it was a mask. But it wasn't, His mouth and eyes moved freely when He spoke to her, taunted her. Something grabbed her arms and held her back. She screamed and thrashed at the iron grasp but it was in vain.

"Katherine," He hissed at her, a smile playing along His mouth as He pointed his wand at the boy. "Katherine," He said again, savouring the way it felt on His lips.

"Wake up!"

Kit's eyes flew open. She fought in vain against what was holding her down. "Katherine, it's okay. It's okay. It's me, Rose. I'm here," she spoke soothingly to her and Kit tried to calm her frantic heart. Rose sat and stroked her hair until the tears had subsided. She felt hollow as Rose curled up beside her, continuing to whisper in Russian to her. It was early in the night still, though it was past curfew. Kit got out of bed and pulled a cloak around her. Rose reached for her but Kit gave her a quick smile that didn't reach her eyes. She retraced her steps to the Slytherin common room and banged her fist on the stones.

"It didn't work," Snape said as the door appeared. It wasn't a question at all. Kit just looked at him and made him see the bags under her eyes. "You've got blood on your face," he said dryly and wiped it off with his finger. Kit flinched back and told him she just wanted the potion. He nodded and stepped back into the common room.

"Only a spoonful," he warned her as she took the vial. She was desperate for something to stop the nightmares.

"Trouble sleeping, Katherine?" Lucius said from one of the sleek couches. Kit could just make out his luminous hair from the rest of the darkness.

"None of your business," she snapped and went to leave. Snape followed her out and held her arm before she could get away.

"Katherine, if you need anything..."

"I don't know if you're enjoying the fact I can't sleep because of your sick, twisted Master, but just stay away, alright?"

"You're welcome," he said as she walked down the hall. Kit didn't reply as she rounded the corner and trekked back to the common room.

"Kit!" James met her on the staircase and swept her up into his arms. "Rose said you had another nightmare," His pressed a kiss against her hair and led her back to the dorms. Kit hadn't told him about the boy in her dreams and she didn't plan to. She was still confused about who he was and why Kit had such a visceral reaction to him being hurt. She pulled herself tighter against James as they walked through the empty halls.

"Why were you out here?"

Kit showed him the vial and lied through her teeth. "Madame Pomfrey made a stronger batch for me." James would hate it if he knew she'd gone to Snape. And although she would enjoy seeing Snape strung up from the Quidditch hoops or some other torture James could think of, she couldn't do it just yet.

"James, do you mind if I stayed in your dorm tonight?"

"Not at all," James took her cloak off as they walked up the stairs and he watched as Kit swallowed a mouthful of potion. "Come here," he pulled her down and drew her body close to his. She fell asleep with her back pressed against his chest to the sound of him murmuring in his sleep.

* * *

Kit woke up and saw James face just above hers. His cheeks were flushed from sleep and he an arm wrapped around her waist. But it wasn't the way his hair stuck out around his head or the way his lips were pursed just a tiniest bit that made Kit smile. It was that she wasn't seeing him fall or die or scream in agony. He was whole, complete and breathing. She hadn't had a single nightmare during the night. Not a scream nor a cry to be heard. Kit smiled, unable to hold it in, and pressed herself closer to James. She kissed him and giggled when he rolled and held her beneath him, his arms hold her back. He still hadn't opened his eyes but he knew every line of her body from memory. He felt along the new scars on her arm, traced the nearly invisible one of her cheek. She ran her hands through his hair, making it stick up and held his cheek.

"James?" He grunted in response and mumbled something against her shoulder. "You're still half asleep, aren't you?" He nodded as he kissed her neck and finally opened his eyes to look down at her.

"Best wake up ever," he said with a cute smile. Kit crinkled her nose at him and laughed against his shoulder. "I take it the potion worked," James was already smiling but it seemed to grow when Kit nodded. Kit smiled with him and allowed herself to be pulled with him as he rolled and kept her against his chest. He gave a sigh of relief, which made Kit's head bob. She played with the fabric of his shirt, her fingers rubbing along the cotton.

"I'm happy," he said at last and Kit didn't know if he meant in general or if he was talking about the potion. She decided that she didn't care which one he meant and instead kissed the bit of skin that peeked out from them collar of his shirt.

"Me, too."

Someone pulled back the curtains and pulled Kit into a hug. "I'm glad you're better," Remus said as he pulled her up. He turned her towards the common room, ignoring James' protests. "Post came for you," Remus pushed her downstairs and watched as she inspected a letter. It had scrawled, left-slanting writing along the front, spelling out her name. She pulled it open and read the short note.

_I hope the potion worked. I look forward to seeing you in Defense. I hope your opinion of me has changed since last night. _  
_ -S_

Kit crumpled the note and tossed it in the empty fireplace. James tumbled after her and frowned at the parchment.

"What was that?"

"Just a note from nobody important." Kit shrugged and grinned at James. He looked adorable, his glasses on crookedly, rubbing his head to trying a force the sleep away. She gave him a little push back up the stairs.

"Go get changed. I'll meet you in the Great Hall," She intended on just giving him a quick kiss in parting, but his hand was on her back a moment later, his other running through her growing hair. Her hands held onto his chest and she pulled him closer. She had to stand on her tip-toes to try and reach his lips and Kit moved one of her hands to hold the back of his head and pull it down to meet her halfway.

"Giant," she joked against his lips.

"Pygmy," he said against her.

"Oi!" Kit pulled back and gave him a look, but stopped short when she saw the passion in his eyes.

"Easily remedied," he said as he bent to hold the top of each of her thighs. He lifted her up a second later and Kit threw her legs around his waist as she tried not to fall. James smirked and gently pushed her against one of the walls.

"Easy," he said again breathlessly as he dipped his head back. Convinced that she wasn't going to fall, Kit ran her fingers along his bare arms and enjoyed the feeling of his shiver. James held her in place with his hips and torso, leaving his hands free to run through her hair and caress her cheeks.

"Um, I need to change for class."

James jumped and hastened to catch Kit, only managing to hold her arms as she fell to the ground. He crouched down and caught her red face between his hands. Then she just started laughing and James soon joined her.

"Maybe it isn't quite so easy," she whispered to him and sent Rose an embarrassed smile as she passed. James pressed his head against the wall, shoulders shaking with laughter. It felt good to laugh after so long. He stayed there and ran his fingers through her hair. It nearly reached her shoulder now and Kit found herself scrambling to find the hair elastics she'd abandoned many years ago.

"I think you guys scarred Rosie," Remus said as he came to find what exactly had sent Rose fleeing. He shook his head at the tangle he and Kit were in and put his hands up. "I don't really want to know," he walked back down the stairs slowly and James stood once he was gone.

"I'll see you at breakfast," Kit took his offered hand and was hoisted to her feet by him. He went to kiss her again but Kit held a hand to his lips. "We may never make to class at this rate,"

"I really don't mind that." Kit shivered as his lips brushed her ear but took a step back.

"I'm being serious." She put her hands on his shoulders and looked him frankly in the eye. "James, it's nearly the summer break. Then there will be no classes, no schedules and we can do what we want."

His eyes lit up but he frowned. "That's two months away."

"Exactly, so think of how great it'll be in two months." Kit stroked his cheek.

"Two months, Kit. I don't think I can do that,"

"Nonsense. You've waited this long, haven't you?"

"Tease," James chided. Kit shrugged and walked off to her room. She heard James mutter something about being the death of him and smiled to herself. Kit dressed in a hurry and ran out to meet James in the common room. It was mad how much she wanted to be with him. She guessed it was just the relief of having slept without screaming or shaking. She caught up with him just as he was leaving and gave his waist a squeeze.

"That was fast. For a girl," James teased and whistled when he saw her crooked shirt and her skirt sitting loosely on her hips. "Jeez, did you dress with your eyes shut?" James said but had no problem about being the one to fix it up. They walked into the Great Hall laughing with their arms wrapped around one another.

"True love, bleh," Sirius gagged into his bowl, sharing a smirk with Peter and Remus.

"Sod off, you un-romantic twit," Kit gave him a push as she walked past, effectively getting a large smear of syrup across his nose. "I'm just glad things are back to normal," she told him as she sat down, James on her other side. She glanced at Rose and saw her embarrassed face over the top of her mug.

"Yes, because you two snogging is totally normal." Sirius gave them both a look, but this time James gave him a push.

"That's to say nothing about you and Rosie." Something clicked in Kit's head as James spoke and she sat bolt up.

"Shit," Sirius muttered, remembering that she was no longer hurt. He tried to duck as she grabbed a fistful of his hair.

"Oi!" he shouted, but she didn't loosen her grip.

"I know I made you swear you wouldn't hurt my cousin, but I want you to know how serious I am about this."

"I think I got it the first time,"

"Regardless. For safe measure, I feel I should warn you I have now learned that very handy dismemberment charm from the book Peter bought me. Got it?"

"Yup. Duly noted." Sirius nodded and sighed when Kit let him go. "She is the single most scary person I have ever met." He muttered to Rose, who burst out laughing.

"Good," Kit smiled and went back to her breakfast like nothing had happened. She looked around a noticed the general buzz of the whole school.

"What happened?" she asked Rose, waving to the loud conversations happening at each table.

"I do not know." Her cousin shrugged and went back to eating her bagel. As if on cue, Dumbledore stood and the whole room dipped into silence. He generally had that effect on a room.

"Good morning everyone. I would like to make an announcement. Your teachers and I have put together a little game, if you will. Something to relieve some stress before your final examinations this June." This was new. Kit turned on the bench to look up at the Headmaster. "There is a golden egg hidden somewhere on the grounds. Whoever finds it, will be granted one wish, and only one. It could be anything, except of course the death of another person. You will be given one hour, and keep in mind that your wish will only last until the last stroke of midnight and the day is done. Good luck too you."

A wish for anything? That could come in handy. Kit turned to face the Marauders with a grin. "Whata you say, boys? How about we get ourselves a golden egg?" They all mirrored her smirk and instead of rushing out like everyone else was, they cleared a spot on the table and worked out a plan.

"He said the grounds, so it could be anywhere," Remus frowned at the map they were constructing out of various breakfast items. A pile of bagels represented the castle and he began setting the cereal around to make the forest.

"It wouldn't be in the forest because that's off limits. And it wouldn't be at the bottom of the lake since it's too easy for someone to get hurt." James said as he looked over it.

"Can we assume it isn't buried somewhere?" Kit asked, poking her fork into the yogurt that was representing the swampy area just beyond the greenhouses.

"I guess. Filch would have a fit if he found the students digging holes in the grounds. Not to mention what Hagrid would do," Sirius shook his head and pointed at the stack of bagels. "I think our best bet is within the castle."

"But he said 'on the grounds.' " Peter pointed out.

"It might have been to throw people off," Kit said and pulled the Marauders' Map out of James' back pocket. After looking around to make sure it was safe, she tapped it with her wand. "I solemnly swear I am up to no good."

"Do you expect there to be some label saying 'Golden Egg?' " Sirius asked as the ink spread out. There were people milling about everywhere, and it was difficult to discern the people from the walls and corridors.

"No, but this is the most accurate map we have of the school." Kit frowned at it and pointed at the map. "I think we can rule out common rooms. Someone would have noticed it being hidden there if that was the case. And the teachers' quarters are out too. What does that leave us with?"

"Every corridor, classroom and bathroom in the school." James said. "We need to figure out a way to divide the whole school up and do a thorough sweep of every place we can get to."

"Wait," Kit said slowly, reaching for her wand. She focused on the spaces between the walls and waved her wand across the parchment. The parts of the map where people had been began to fill with colour until there were only a handful of places left blank.

Remus nodded at Kit and grinned. "If we assume everyone is looking-"

"Which they will be,"

"-the egg has to be in one of the places they aren't." Remus quickly divided the places up. Kit was to take the upper-most options: the astronomy tower and the divination classroom. James took the level below in the deserted Charms classroom. Each floor was divided up that way until every space was taken.

"Ready?" James said as he stuffed the map back in his pocket. They all nodded back and went their separate ways. Kit ran up the stairs until she was forced to use that rickety ladder. She inhaled the stuffy air and coughed at the incense that hung in the air. That was precisely why she'd dropped Divination as soon as she'd been able to. She lifted the long tablecloths of each of table and searched under each crystal ball and overturned tea cup. She dug through the massive container of loose tea leaves and slipped through every book. Her cheeks were flushed from the stifling heat when she finally emerged and deemed the place empty. She breathed a grateful breath of fresh air as she landed back on the floor and began to climb up to the Astronomy Tower. It was deserted, which was surprising, but as Kit leaned over the edge, she could see scores of students running around the grounds, looking under every rock and fallen branch. Kit tried to recall her lessons and as took apart each telescope and put them back together after inspecting them. One of them had been too difficult and she'd just left it in pieces for Professor Sinistra to take care of.

"I take it you haven't found the egg yet," someone said coolly from the door and Kit rolled her eyes.

"Take a hint, Snape. I don't want your help or whatever it is you're offering." Kit face the greasy boy and put her hands on her hips. "I've got boyfriend and a fiance that would love to have an excuse to beat you up," she told him. Technically, she and Sirius didn't have to be engaged anymore, she was legally seventeen now but they'd never gotten around to filling out the long and complicated forms.

"Actually, _I'd_ love to have a reason to drop you off this tower, so don't tempt me."

"How did the potion work?" he asked and Kit felt like smacking him. She didn't want to be friendly with him, not in the slightest, but if he was her only hope of a quiet night she'd have to make some effort not to treat him like the bag of pus he was.

"Fine. Thanks, whatever." Kit shrugged and looked out over the grounds so she didn't have to see what was visible of his face from behind his lank hair.

"Why do you hate me?"

"You mean besides the fact you're a Slytherin, a stuck up prat, so dirty I feel the need to wash when you're around and that you're so good at Potions it makes me sick? By association."

"I don't follow," he said, but he was smiling out at the grounds. She was jealous of how well he did at Potions.

"You're becoming a Death Eater, you hang around Regulus and Malfoy and...well...I just don't like you. Why am I even talking to you?" Kit asked herself and walked off, throwing her hands up in the air.

"Maybe you could try to see things from my perspective," he said as she walked through the door.

"Not a hope in hell." she slammed the door shut and ran down the stairs. The Slytherins were really getting on her nerves this year. More so than the previous years. Snape! she asked herself as she walked back to the Great Hall. Snape hated her by association just as much as she did. This was probably some ploy his parents had schemed up to get her over to his side. She was so sick of mind games!

Kit threw herself onto the bench and ran a hand through her hair, looking disdainfully at the ends. On a completely different and superficial note, her hair really needed a cut. It was starting to need more taking care of than the simple wash and dry system she'd had before. Kit pulled the one elastic she'd borrowed off of Rose and tied her hair back.

"No luck?" Rose asked as she sat beside her.

"None," Kit muttered. "I could have really used that wish too."

"For what?" Rose inquired as she poured a drink.

"I don't know, to know the answers to the Potions exam, to get Sirius off of you for a day, to have a day of peace." Kit laughed and took a glass of water. "What about you?"

"A day without you frowning at Sirius," Rose said and Kit lifted her head to inspect her cousin.

"It bothers you that much?"

"What do you think?"

"It's just that he's said so many things to other girls. I love him but I really, _really_ don't trust him with this stuff."

"But you've seen him. He is kind and caring and gentle." Kit snorted at that one and Rose rolled her eyes. "So, not gentle all the time. But he does care."

Kit wanted to tell Rose how against love Sirius was. It came from a childhood so devoid of it that it was criminal. She wanted to tell Rose that he'd been just as caring and kind with Jessica, Harper, Kayley, Haley and Laura. He probably couldn't even say the word love in a meaningful way. But Kit held her tongue and rolled the glass between her hands. Short of tossing him into the lake and holding him under, there wasn't much Kit could do. Rose had made it very obvious how she felt and Sirius felt something but Kit didn't know what. He'd _said_ it felt different than the others but now Kit wondered if that was just because there was way more danger because Kit was threatening him, or, more specifically, his manhood. Or maybe it was because he didn't know Rose her whole life while he'd known most of his shags since they were awkward eleven year-olds.

"Did you get it?" A breathless James asked, Sirius on his tail.

"Nope, did you?" Kit asked as James slid to sit beside her. He put his head on her shoulder and sighed.

"I really wanted that wish."

"What for?" Kit asked and laughed when he pulled her into his lap and whispered in her ear.

"For you to forget about waiting until the summer,"

"James! You could have wished for a day without any fighting or without anyone going hungry and you wish for _that_!" So, Kit had been thinking along the same lines, but he didn't need to know that. He shrugged and reached out to take her glass.

"To be honest, it was the only thing I was thinking of," James looked down at the water swirling around in the glass instead of his girlfriend but she still saw the way the back of his neck turned ruddy.

"That's cute, if a little randy." Kit said and James gave an embarrassed cough. She played with his hair as Remus jogged in empty handed.

"Anything?' he asked them hopefully, but his face fell when they all shook their heads.

"That leaves Peter," Remus said while looking out the door. Sirius and James made little scoffing noises. Rose smacked Sirius for it but Kit kind of agreed with the others. If Peter was their only hope things didn't look to bright. He would have lost his head if it wasn't attached to his shoulders. He'd lost his pet frog on the first day of school and had yet to find him. Kit admitted defeat in her head and they waited for Peter to come back empty handed. She talked about the upcoming tests and their plans for the summer when she suddenly sat up straighter and looked around. Rose did the same thing and they both stood.

"Where are you going?" Sirius asked as they began to walk out of the Great Hall.

"To find Peter," Rose said quickly before dashing out with Kit on her heels. What if something had happened to him? Life wouldn't be the same if the little, watery-eyed friend wasn't around. Kit ran past Rose to the room Peter had been assigned to. It was an old Potions classroom in the basement and when Kit threw open the door she saw something she hadn't been expected.

Peter was surrounded by girls. Girls of every age and house. They all pined for his attention in a way that would have been ridiculous if Kit hadn't been so furious with them. Why did they get his attention while she was stuck all the way at the back? Kit elbowed her way through, pushing past the stupid girls that were trying to feel his hair or get a smile from him. One of them even tried to say she was Peter's best friend.

"Come on, Peter. You know I'm your best friend," Kit said breathlessly as she finally made it through the crowd.

"But of course, I am more then best friend." Rose came up and turned his face to hers, stroking his cheek and playing with his hair.

"Oi! Not a chance, blondie." Kit gave her cousin a push and wrapped an arm around Peter. "We all know I've known you the longest. I've been there for you." Kit tried to pull him from the crowd but it was like trying to walk through a brick wall. So Kit settled for standing in front of him and grabbing his cheeks. "Your eyes are so blue," she said, staring at the pretty pale eyes as they blinked up at her in surprise. Why had she never noticed that before? Or the fact that his face wasn't rat-like at all, it was elfin and sweet. Kit ran her hands along his arms and tilted her head.

"Peter, I know you think Rose is great and all, but I'm the better one here. She's way too uptight for someone like you. You want to have fun don't you?" Peter nodded furiously but before Kit could say anything she was pushed aside by Rose.

"But Peter, I'm not uptight. I know how to have tons of fun." Rose wagged her eyebrows at him, a trait she'd probably picked up from Sirius. Rose pulled him from the room and left a number of girls pouting at their backs. Kit ran out and followed them, noticing that Peter was already panting from the short run.

"What's going on?" James asked as he caught her running by. He tried to hold her still as she tried to run past and eventually gave up and just ran beside her.

"Rose took Peter. That cow!" Kit muttered and left a shocked James in her wake. Kit threw the door to the common room open and growled when she saw Peter pulling Rose into his lap. Kit ran at the couch but Rose got there first and put her feet in his lap. Kit glared at the two of them and considered throwing the large textbook on the table at Rose's head.

"What is going on?" Sirius asked James as he ran in. James shrugged and grabbed a hold of Kit.

"Gerroff!" Kit told James, fighting against him. He looked over her head at Sirius who was too busy watching Rose and Peter walk up to the dorms.

"Why did Rose just take Peter upstairs?" Sirius asked, his voice dark.

"Because she's in love with him, duh." Sirius laughed at Kit's reply but sobered when he realized Kit wasn't laughing.

"You are joking, right?"

"Hardly. Have you seen him?" Kit waved her hand up the stairs and sighed. Why had she never noticed how cute he was before?

"Did Madame Pomfrey slip you drugs or something?" James spun her around and looked her in the eye. She had a dopey, love-sick expression on her face.

"When did you suddenly fall in love with Peter?"

"I don't know. I just sort of realized this afternoon." James and Sirius locked eyes above Kit's head, matching expressions of horror on their faces.

"The egg," they said at the same time and James slumped onto the couch, dragging Kit with him.

"Of all the things he could have wished for..." Sirius muttered, running a hand through his hair.

"Like you would have wished for anything different." James scoffed but Sirius was already up and getting Rose away from Peter. "Kit, just stay here until midnight. You'll regret it if you don't."

"Like hell I will," she muttered, still trying to pry James' arms off of her. Kit crossed her arms and pouted. She glared at Ana Turner who walked past and up to the boys dorms. "No way," she hissed as she heard the boys' dorm door close and the muffled sound of Peter being pushed into bed.

"Gross," Kit stuck her tongue out and tried to wipe the image of Peter with Ana from her mind. Actually, she tried to wipe the image of Peter with anyone but her from her mind. James gave up trying to hold her back with his arms and pinned her down to the couch easily. He looked up at the clock on the mantle and sighed. This was going to be a long four hours.

* * *

**Third chapter in the posting marathon! The angsty stuff is coming!**

**Dahlia**


	23. Chapter 23

Kit tugged on James' hand as she navigated the busy town. They'd just used a portkey to get to Italy and her parents had given her the key to the cabin while they went off to buy some food for the next few weeks.

"So, it''s the family cabin on my mom's side. We all share it and this summer, for three weeks, we get it." Kit smiled back at them as they pulled their bags across the cobble stones of the lovely city of Elba.

"Where is it?" Sirius said as they made it out of the busy square and onto the more rural streets.

"Just up here. And the best part is that our neighbours are wizards too, so we don't have to worry about using magic."

"Not that we can do much anyway," Remus said and Kit nodded. They'd had to go through Wizard Customs when they'd landed and the agent there had to make sure they weren't going to do any mischievous magic while they were in Italy. Of course, the whole process had been rather easy since Kit's mother was an Auror. Kit trailed her hand along the cobblestone wall that ran along the side of the road and looked out over the water that surrounded the island. She turned onto a path and walked down the wooden stairs to the cabin that was right on the beach. She unlocked the door and threw it open, inhaling the scent of sea water and the sun. The back wall was one large window that looked out onto the water and Kit could just make out the neighbour's children playing on the beach.

She'd spent a few summers in the cabin and her favourite part was the stone floors. Every room of the single floor abode had a mosaic of colourful stones for flooring. The best part was when all the windows were open and the sun came in, the floors were always pleasantly warm beneath her feet. Kit pointed out the bedrooms, of which there were four. Everyone had to share a room but none of them seemed to mind. James tossed his bag onto the bed and wrapped an arm around Kit.

"I love this place," she sighed, trying not to think about the fact that there was only on bed in the room. She'd slept in the same bed as James before but being out of school and under rather lax parental security made it that much more different. James had, of course, noticed and pressed a kiss to her shoulder.

"You know, it _is_ the summer now..."

"James!" She smacked his chest and pulled him out of the room. "Beach?" she asked her friends. They were sprawled across the large couches and chairs. Without waiting for an answer, she pulled open the large glass window and ran into the water, still full clothed. The water was warm and salty, but Kit loved it. She remembered trying to out run the waves as a child, or being pulled into the crystal waters by the undertow.

"Gotcha!" James tackled her into the water and for a moment all she could see were thousands of little white bubbles as a wave crashed over their heads. James held fast to her as they were carried closer to the shore and when they finally broke the surface, Kit fell back onto the wet sand. James had abandoned his glasses at the house and used his hands to see what his eyes couldn't. The sun beat down on them and all Kit could smell was that salty smell she'd always loved, intensified. She used James' chest as a pillow and let the water brush along her toes as it came in.

"I was thinking,"

"That's dangerous," Kit joked, enjoying the feel of James' chest rumbling with a chuckle.

"I was thinking that we should take on this Dark Lord stuff together."

"What sort of 'together?' "

"All of us and as many people as we can get together. We can't be the only ones being threatened by him. Get a group together."

Kit twisted her hair around her finger, tugging until she felt a sharp sting in her scalp. Did she want more people involved? Letting her friends risk their lives for her was one thing, but people she hardly knew was something entirely different. But they would be fighting for a noble cause, something that needed fighting. She could feel the fears and nagging worries try to worm back into her system, to try and make her stare at the ceiling all night, unable to push the thoughts from her mind. Kit let her hand fall back in the sand and shook her head.

"Can we wait until the school year?"

"But he's out there now,"

"But it's the summer and this is the first time in a long time I've seen Rose actually relaxed. Can we just wait?" It was absurd to ask the world, the Dark Lord to wait until the fall, but that was what Kit wanted.

* * *

It was what Kit got, as chance had it. After returning home from the villa in Elba, Remus with a new penpal and possible love named Danielle Torres, the school year started up at an alarming rate. James had been named Head Boy with Lily Evans being the Head Girl. Kit didn't know how she felt about it. On one hand, James had matured and taken his responsibility serious, but on the other he was sharing a private dorm-area with Evans. Kit didn't try and hide her jealousy, but James was quick to calm her.

"Kit, I am devoted to you, not to some red-head with the personality of a piece of wood." He said one October day while they were curled up in the library. They were supposed to be working on a Potions assignment, a class Kit had been forced to take if she wanted to become an Auror. But the homework was forgotten and pushed to one side of the desk.

"What if she tries something? What about then? Because, James, you're a great guy, but you are a guy. It would take one glimpse of her in her knickers for you to be gone."

"Really? That's what you think of me?" James acted ashamed, but there was a real hurt lurking behind his glasses.

"I'm just not putting it past her." Kit grumbled as she drew stars on her forgotten homework.

"She's not an awful person, Kit. She'd never do something really mean. You guys just got off on the wrong foot." He scratched the back of his neck then pressed a kiss against her shoulder. "It would make my life easier if you didn't hate each other." He said hopefully. "Besides, I have a room all to myself now. No Remus, Peter or Sirius. No one to bug us." He whispered, his breath warm against her neck. She hadn't considered sleeping with James, or anyone, after the scare Eric had given her. But she was comfortable with James and he was getting antsy. Not that Kit could really blame him; he'd told her he'd been waiting somewhere around two years to do it. Kit squirmed and gave him a look.

"Too soon?" he asked, scrunching his nose up. He looked so embarrassed suddenly and he was tugging on his hair like he did when he was worried. Kit pressed a lingering kiss against his lips and moved his hand from his hair to her waist. She felt him smile before pulling her close.

"Maybe not," Kit managed to whisper before James pulled her back. He was eager, his hands exploring more then ever. Kit could feel warmth fill her right down to her fingertips and goosebumps raise on her skin. James ground her hips against his, eliciting a gasp from Kit. She'd tried to stifle it against his lips but judging by the little cough and the irritated Madame Pince that appeared a moment later, she hadn't quite accomplished it. Kit bit on her lip to stop from laughing as she and James stuffed the unfinished work into their bags and ran from the library. Once outside the stuffy walls, James pressed her against the stones and knotted a hand in her hair.

"Oops," Kit giggled and James broke before his lips could touch hers. They held onto each other for support as they laughed, nearly falling over at one point.

"Do you think we'll ever be allowed back in?" James asked as they walked back to the common room.

"Like you even care. This is the first time you've been in the whole year. We'll get Remus to smuggle books out for us."

"True enough," James shrugged and let her enter the room first.

"Why thank you, sir," Kit dipped into an awful and ungraceful curtsy. James bowed to her and held his arm out to her. She went to loop her arm through his, but he grabbed her and tackled her onto the couch before she could protest.

"You're strange," Kit said when she managed to stop laughing. She reached up to kiss his cheek but he turned his head and caught her bottom lip between his teeth. She smiled and it slipped out again. She ran a hand through his ever-messy hair and pulled him down to meet her lips.

"We're never going to get the Potions assignment done, are we?" James asked with a chuckle some time later once the sun had set and their friends had given up on trying to talk to them.

"Slughorn isn't going to accept 'I got distracted by my boyfriend' as a excuse, is he?"

"I hardly think so,"

"Then you were busy with Head Boy duties, okay?" James laughed and laid his forehead against hers.

"Sure, you slacker."

* * *

December had come and had brought with it the coldest weather Kit had ever experienced. Snow covered every surface outside the warmth of the Hogwarts halls and even the fires fought to keep the chill out. Kit was gad for the warm body next to her as she snuggled deeper into the covers. James was always warm, even in the dead of winter his body was like a fireplace. It was really nice and very distracting when she was sitting beside him in the freezing Potions classroom. Too many times she'd been told to "leave Mr Potter alone" during class. Kit smiled to herself as James pulled her close and pressed a kiss to her back.

"I was thinking," he began softly. They were in the Head Boy's dorm and Kit had heard Lily leave at dawn or some other ungodly time. "We have the whole day to ourselves on account of the dance tonight."

"Should I leave so you can break out the rose petals?" Kit joked as she cracked her eyes open. He was smiling at her and raised a brow.

"You were expecting rose petals?"

"After getting the stars to spell out my name, I don't know what to expect anymore." Kit rolled out of bed and walked over to the private bathroom. She wrapped a towel around herself and slipped out her pyjamas as she turned the water on. There was a cupboard under the sink that was just for her stuff and she broke out the expensive bath set Rose had bought her for her birthday that James liked so much. After inspecting her legs, she grabbed a razor too. Kit wasn't thinking about what would happen once she got out of the shower only that there was _something_ waiting for her on the other side of the door.

All scrubbed and shaved, Kit threw a towel over her head and rubbed her hair dry. She hadn't gotten it cut since sometime in the previous year and it was quickly becoming a hassle to take care of. She planned on cutting it after the dance tonight and just getting it done with. Wrapping herself in a towel, Kit ran a nervous hand through her damp hair and pushed open the door. James was sitting on the edge of the bed, his elbows propped up on his knees, hand laced in front of his eyes. If it was possible, James Potter looked nervous. He looked up at her when she stood before him and gave her a flickering smile.

"I'm, uh..." he rubbed a hand over his face and sighed. And despite him not being able to form a sentence, Kit knew exactly what he meant. She bent slightly and kissed him gently. Her damp hair tickled his shoulders a drops of water ran down his bare chest. He held her waist and pulled her down onto the mattress. His propped himself up on his forearms and just looked at her for a moment before running a hand along the unbroken line from one shoulder to the next. Her skin was still damp, still warm and steamy from the shower. He kissed her neck, slowly working his way to her waiting lips. It took a single motion for the towel to fall open. James looked in awe for a moment; he'd never seen Kit so completely. He bent to appreciate every inch of skin he could see before finding her lips again. When he pulled back, the question was evident in his eyes. Kit nodded and felt him move and adjust her placement. She felt a swoop of regret that this wouldn't be like she'd imagined. She'd already given herself to someone else, a fact that still bothered her.

James buried his head into her neck and a moment later Kit gasped, the sound spearing through him. James felt it too, and he pulled back to catch Kit smiling despite the pain. "I didn't...with Eric...Merlin," Kit sighed kissed James. That single stab of stretching pain she hadn't thought possible made that day even more monumental. Kit would be doing this for the first time with James. She felt herself smile as another stab of pain rippled through her.

A gasp. A moan. Knotted bedsheets. Kit held onto James as he gripped her hips. He held her close, impossibly so, then collapsed against her, his head buried in the sweet scent of her hair. He peppered kisses along her neck, nipping at her skin feverishly. Kit's hands roamed over his skin, moving more in marvel than anything else. This felt right, everything about it felt right. She squirmed when James found a sensitive spot just below her ear.

"I love you," he breathed against her. He didn't - couldn't - meet her eye. He meant it with every fibre of his being, but he couldn't look in her eyes and see any flicker of uncertainty or worry. It would hurt too much. Kit ran her hands through his hair, pulling on it until he looked at her. Her brown eyes were wide and free of anything but raw emotion.

"I love you," Kit pressed her lips against his.

**

* * *

Awwwhh! Finally, right? Well, keep your socks on coz this is about to get messy. Really messy. Bridge and I are finally getting down to the nitty gritty stuff. Keep checking as I hope to post the new chapter soon! I know this is short, and I'm sorry, but everything else just had to be in the next chapter!  
**

**Thanks to everyone who's reviewed. If any of you have written anything, you know how much it means to get even a one line review. It made my day to see that I'd been added to an alert list **_**and**_** had a review. Thank you WereRanga!**

**Dahlia**


	24. Chapter 24

Kit looked dubiously at the dress hanging on her bed frame and crossed her arms.

"Why am I wearing this again?" she asked Rose, who was still in the bathroom.

"Because is special night and James likes dress," Rose said, her voice muffled by the thick wooden door between them. And despite it, Kit rolled her eyes at her cousin.

"James has made it very obvious that he likes me in jeans just as much." Besides, this dress looked far more dangerous than the one from last year. It was long and strappy and reminded her of the dress she'd worn to Sirius's house. She ran a hand along the fabric and felt the cool silk float beneath her fingers.

"Do you not like James when he dresses up?"

"Well, yeah. He looks great in dress robes," Kit said and went about finding something else to wear.

"Same thing applies to you." Rose pushed open the door and smacked the pair of jeans out of Kit's hands. "Put dress on." Rose gave her cousin a hard look then picked her dress off of her bed. They were alone in the dorm, Lily and her friends already having gone down for a pre-party study session or something along those lines. Kit had made a bit of an effort to be nice to Evans, but it was irritating when she was constantly reminded of assignments and paper whenever Lily ran into her in the hall. The worst was when she would bring up something, or want to talk at length about a particular charm when it was obvious that she and James wanted some alone time. Kit had always thought Remus was too concerned about his grades; he was nothing compared to the likes of Lily Evans. Still, Kit had refrained from (most) foul language and derisive scoffs when she was around.

Kit stuck her tongue out at Rose, but slipped into the dress nonetheless. It was a full length black number, which played nicely with her growing hair. The dress was long and straight and didn't have any slits up the side. Kit threw her hair up into a messy bun, a style she'd acquired from Rose once her hair had been long enough and she used on a daily basis. She slid her feet into a pair of low heels Rose had 'donated' to her. Which meant Rose no longer liked them and she decided that Kit needed to own a pair herself. Kit tucked her wand into bun and ran a hand along her dress, smoothing the fabric down. She gave a little turn, told Rose that she'd wait for her downstairs, and went into the common room. Sirius was lounging across one of the couches, his ankles crossed and dangling over the side. It was sad that Kit could lie full length across the couch and just barely reached the two arms. She gave him a smile and leaned on the back of the worn couch.

"James is helping to set up?" he asked.

"Yeah, he and Lily are already down there,"

Sirius sat up and peered at her. "Lily? Not Evans or the red-head?" He whistled and sat back. "James _has_ got you whipped."

"Hey!" Kit smacked him but smiled. "Where's Remus?"

"Using James' room to talk to Danielle."

"I think that's nice. Aren't they meeting up during Christmas break?"

"Her parents are coming up to visit London for a few weeks," Sirius said. Kit nodded and thought of the Italian girl she'd met a few times over the years. They weren't friends, but they would go get gelato together in the city or climb the rocks by the water if they were both headed that way. Kit thought of the mass of curls that Danielle had and how her broken English sounded more beautiful than anything else. Kit slumped a little and let a dreamy smile drift across her features. Just that morning she and James had said they loved each other and shared what was perhaps the biggest thing Kit could think of. She'd already gushed to Rose about it, how she felt, how right it all was, how she loved James.

"You know he'd been waiting for two years to say it?" Sirius asked nonchalantly.

"Say what?"

"That he loved you. Merlin, he used to go on about it for days. This afternoon, I swear, it was like a fairy had flown up his backside, he was so happy." But despite his words, Sirius was grinning from ear to ear. "I'm happy for you two," he said earnestly. There was no trace of joking in his grey eyes, only joy. Kit blinked, taken aback by the sudden seriousness.

"Really? I mean, you joke around and everything, but...Really?"

"Not a word of a lie."

"Since we're being so honest, what does Rose really mean to you?"

"Is this the equivalent of having a talk with her father?" Sirius joked, but sobered quickly. "Kit, she's, she's...she's-"

"Not Ana Turner?"

"Definitely not Ana Turner. She's so much more. She's like everything."

"Sirius, I know you're afraid of it, but I think you need to accept the L-word."

"Lesbian?" Sirius asked, his brows disappearing into his sloppy hair.

"Love, you dolt," Kit punched his arm. He rubbed at it absently, but it was obvious that for the time being, his mind was else where. And Kit was just fine with that. She gave him a parting smile before slipping out to meet James in the Great Hall. She grabbed a handful of her skirt as she descended the stairs and James was waiting for her at the bottom. He held a flower out for her, a white orchid that had been magically frosted over. She held it as gently as she could before pulling him to her lips. He smiled for a moment before wrapping his arms around her and carrying her down the last two steps. She gave a little squeal and held onto him tighter. He set her down but kept a hold of her waist.

"You look beautiful," he whispered, reaching to push his glasses up his nose in his nervous way.

"You look dashing yourself," Kit held onto a lapel on his jacket and gave it a tug. He kissed her hand as her fingers brushed along his bottom lip. Kit laughed and pulled him into the Great Hall. Everything was a glistening shade of white, silver or blue. And everyone was dressed up. Kit caught sight of Lily in a gold dress and nodded at her. Lily smiled back while fixing the arrangement of flowers on the table. People were beginning to file in and James and Kit found a place near the refreshment table to wait for the rest of the gang. James was slumped against the table and Kit was settled against his chest.

Suddenly, a vision of pink roses and blonde hair sprung from the crowd, a gleeful looking Sirius following behind her. Kit had to blink at her cousin's dress again. It was a short white thing that was covered in little pink roses and green vines. Her green shoes wrapped up her legs like another set of vines and Kit couldn't help but think that she looked like something from the Herbology greenhouses. Albeit something beautiful.

"You like dress I make?" Rose asked James, her eyes bright with joy. James eagerly nodded his head and Kit turned and gave him a look.

"Oh, and I don't look that nice? Hm?" Kit put both her hands on her hips.

"What? No, no, I was just being..." James floundered, his eyes frantic. Kit burst out laughing and put her forehead against his chest.

"I was kidding, Prongs." Kit pressed a kiss against the fabric of his shirt and giggled when he relaxed.

"You're going to kill me one day, woman." He growled and spun her around so her back was pressed into the table.

"The James Potter beaten by some girl?"

"You're not some girl. You're the Kit Ruskova. And you're driving me mad." James held her face and kissed her deeply. She wrapped an arm around his neck and pulled playfully at his hair. Kit felt his hands run along the seams of her dress and his mouth pull down into a frown.

"Why did Rose give you such a long dress," he muttered, eyeing the long skirt with distaste.

"Because she knows you too well," Kit laughed when James gave a shrug and pulled her onto the dance floor. "C'mon," he smiled at her and spun her around as a new song began to play. He lifted her up and twirled her around, letting her slide back down until she was once again wrapped in his arms. He took her hand and held it close to chest as they danced in a slow circle. Kit's head was resting against his chest, just over his heart as they danced.

"Mind if I cut in?" Kit looked up to see Sirius standing behind James. She wrinkled her nose up at him and said, "ew," but he took her hand anyway.

"And why aren't you dancing with Rosie?" Kit asked as they spun around.

"She went off somewhere while I was getting drinks." He gave a shrug and twirled Kit. "She probably went to powder her nose of whatever it is you girls do."

"Sure, whatever you say," Kit rolled her eyes. A new song began and Kit heard someone clear their throat.

"Can I just dance with my boyfriend? Is that to much to ask?" Kit turned to see a young Hufflepuff boy looking up at her. "What's up?" she asked upon seeing the boy's shaking hands.

"T-the Headmaster wants t-to talk to you." He gulped when Kit tensed.

"What about?"

"He said it was about a...ah...family matter." The boy was shivering now, but Kit pushed past him, grabbing a hold of Sirius. "He said you need to go alone." Kit turned to face the boy but Sirius challenged him first.

"Why would he say that?" The poor kid was nearly crying now; Sirius had unleashed all of his intimidating, seventh year impressiveness on him.

"Pads, you know how my dad is. I bet you a galleon he's up there now. Remember how he doesn't want any of you involved?" Kit patted his shoulder and walked past him into the hall. Had she been looking, she would have seen the young boy nod at the tall blond lurking in the shadows. She would have seen him follow her out. But she didn't look and she couldn't hear his footsteps over the clacking of her own shoes.

"Katherine," Lucius grabbed her wrist and pulled her to a stop.

"What, Malfoy?"

"Surnames, really, Katherine?"

"I'm rather busy," she twisted her wrist, but he held her tight. Wariness set in and she fixed Malfoy with a dark look.

"I knew you'd catch on eventually. Come quietly and I won't have to do anything rash." He pulled out his wand and began pulling her down the hall. He nudged a door open with his knee and pushed her out into the snow. She tumbled and used the momentum to break his grip and make a run for it. Her shoes crunched through the snow, her skirt already ripping as she forced her legs to move faster than they had gone before. She ripped her wand from her bun and held it in a vice grip. She didn't look back, but kept her sights on Hagrid's cabin not far from her. She had a lead, she could make it there before he caught up with her.

"Katherine!" Lucius called after her, his voice far to calm for someone who'd just lost their prey. Kit stumbled as a spell hit her knees and she landed roughly on the frozen ground. The edge of her dress got caught on a twig and ripped up one side. And somewhere between fearing the man behind her and what was to come, Kit had time to think that Rose was going to kill her for ruining the dress. Kit kicked the shoes off and took off again. Her feet went numb quickly but she kept running for Hagrid's cabin. The side of it was within arm's reach when Lucius tackled her and sent her flying into the stone wall.

"You made this so much more fun," he hissed, his lips moving against her neck. She twisted her face away from him as he pinned her against the rough wall, her cheek scraping and tearing against the rocks. Malfoy held her wrists and led her away from the safety of the cabin and towards the dark forest.

"You son of a bitch, I'm going to kill you. I'm going to rip your heart out, you hear me!" Kit screamed at him. "I will tear you apart and feed your remains to some mutt on the street. I'll kill your fucking family for this!"

"I've got her," Lucius laughed and pushed her into a clearing by the lake. She stumbled as he let go of her wrist before she launched herself at him. Her raked her nails across his cheek until he bled. Regulus watched in fascination while the other, older man howled with laughter.

"I like this one," he wheezed. Kit rose and lifted her foot, intent on stamping on his loins but with a speed she hadn't been expecting, the older man caught her around the waist and pressed her against a nearby tree. He ran a yellow, ridged nail along her bloody cheek.

"So much life," he dug his sharp nail into the fresh wound on her cheek until blood ran down his finger. Kit hissed in pain and twisted away. He held her in place as he licked the blood from his hand. When his eerie, animal eyes turned back to her, the blood lust was all too evident in them. He leant in and licked her cheek. Kit brought her knee up as fast as she could and allowed herself a smirk as he doubled up.

"Greyback!" Regulus shouted, sounding very important and angry. Kit turned to face him, but her eyes fell on something else instead. Her cousin lying on the ground, awake but limp.

"What the fuck are you doing?" she asked Regulus. She tried to storm over to him, but Greyback wrapped a hand around her arm until his nails bit into her skin.

"Kit, run," she heard Rose hiss in a cracked and raspy voice. Kit scoffed once and rolled her eyes.

"Yes, because there's even a chance either of us can get away." She snapped. "Tell us what you're doing." She demanded of Regulus.

"Why should I tell you?"

"Because I'm important and needed and of pureblood. You've got traitors in our family somewhere." Kit challenged him.

"You can stop trying to play that game, Katherine. It won't work this time."

"In that case, I'll peel your skin off until you tell me wheat's happening." Behind her, Greyback was wheezing with laughter.

"I like her much more than the blonde." He said, his foul breath brushing along her cheek.

"I'm flattered," Kit muttered. She turned to look back to the castle and saw the bright yellow light shine from the open door. "You really haven't thought this through, have you?" They followed her gaze to where she was looking and each swore under their breath. A crowd was gathering in the door and people were beginning to search the grounds. Kit took a deep breath, gave Rose a look, then took off for the crowd. They were far away, but Kit forced herself to believe she could make it.

"JAMES!" She shouted, running at the crowd. She couldn't make any of the people out in the dark, but she heard him call out for her. She pumped her legs harder, staring ahead at safety Hogwarts promised.

"KIT!" James pushed through the crowd and Kit could just make him out. She inhaled to shout back but something knocked the air from her. Greyback loped at her on his hands and knees, resembling a werewolf more than a man, and tackled her down. He grabbed her with enough force to crack her forearm and threw her over his shoulder. He took off for the woods again and yelled at Regulus as they neared the end of the forest.

"Get it ready!" Kit could see Rose being held by Regulus not far away as he kicked something at his feet. A stag ran through the trees and shoved Greyback away with his antlers. One collided neatly with her ribs as she went flying. A massive black dog was trying to rip Regulus to shreds while the stag tried to fight a savage human. Kit slumped down by a tree and lost consciousness before she could try and move.

* * *

Kit woke up some time later, her cheek against the cool leather. She didn't open her eyes yet and instead tried to fool herself into believing she was at home, lying on her couch. Her mother wasn't far, just in the kitchen making tea while her father treated her wounds. But such comfort never came. There were no calming Russian words, no smell of tea. She heard the restless sound of a handful of people shuffling around. She forced her eyes open, if only to confirm that her hopes were crushed. She saw Rose's back, her dress stained and ripped. The pink roses seemed out of place now, mocking her situation. She turned her head, biting down on her lip when she had to pry her face from the couch where the blood had dried and fused her to it. A pair of blue eyes watched her move and Fenrir licked his lips when fresh blood began to pump to her reopened wounds.

"Katherine," Kit looked up to see the Dark Lord standing near her, Rose in front him in some valiant effort to protect her. He was terrifying and just as he had been in her nightmares. The only thing she had to remind her of reality was the absence of the young boy that always entered her dreams. Kit looked up at him darkly, meeting his gaze resolutely. He gave, if possible, a gleeful chuckle.

"You may look like your mother, but you have the spirit of Luka. He never would show submission," he seemed to consider something as he looked at her. She felt an odd sensation in her head, a probing. As Kit stared at the Dark Lord, she recalled a lesson of long ago from her Defense class. Legilimency. It would impossible to say that Kit enjoyed the feeling, but she wouldn't hide from him, she had nothing to hide. Her abhorring for him at the forefront of her mind. His face contorted into a twisted sense of amusement before Rose acted like an idiot and brought the attention to herself. He was now looking into her mind and seeing god only knows what. Kit shivered and wrapped her arms around herself now that he was distracted. She looked around the room and saw nothing distinguishing. Save for the lack of any warmth or comfort, they could have been sitting in her own sitting room. Her hair had fallen free and her wand was somewhere back on the Hogwarts grounds. Against someone like the Dark Lord, she was defenceless, something that bothered her more than anything else.

Rose fell to her knees before the Dark Lord, horror clouding her face, tears clinging to her pale lashes. Kit stood and found her voice.

"That's enough," she told him, putting a hand on Rose's shoulder. "You want information?"

"You need to learn to enjoy these moment, Katherine." He walked slowly back to his chair and looked pointedly at her.

"Enjoy torturing my cousin? Not a chance." She should have shown more respect for him, and judging by the uneasy murmur that went through the room, Kit wasn't the only one thinking it.

"You should learn some respect," he said mildly. She didn't move from her spot. "Katherine, are we going to play this game? It's become so old in your family." When she didn't budge he sighed and reached for his wand. "Very well." With a flick of his wrist, Kit was on her knees before him, another and her cheek was pressed to his boots. He held her jaw and lifted her face until she looked at him.

"We don't have to do this. You can tell me what I want, spend a few days with associates of mine and then have all the power you want. Anything, Katherine, could be yours. Just stop being so stubborn." She stared at him, oblivious to Rose's pleas as he brought her nightmares to the forefront of her mind. The little boy, James, Rose, everyone falling at his hand.

"You dreamt of me, how endearing." He mused as he held her there. Kit sat, transfixed somewhere between horror and awe as he made her relive them again. She couldn't push him out, it was like fighting a brick wall. She slumped and closed her eyes against the assault, knowing it wouldn't help. What happened next happened to quickly for Kit to truly react to. Rosie aimed her wand at the Dark Lord and fired the Killing Curse. It failed and a moment later, Kit was being led down to the dungeon while Rose was being taken up to a study to be 'questioned.' It wasn't until a few hours of sitting in the middle of the damp room that it hit her. Rose would come down there hours later, beaten, broken and bruised, maybe half-way to dead and there was nothing she could do about it. She launched herself at the heavy door, pounding it with her fist, tearing at the wood until her nails cracked.

"You should save your energy," someone remarked dryly from the corner. Pushing back her hood, Bellatrix revealed herself, a scowl on her face.

"Why would that be?"

"My Master loves a good fight." Bella nearly licked her lips in anticipation.

"You're disgusting." Kit mumbled. She leaned against the door and pressed her cheek against the rough wood.

"You know what's disgusting? Your attempts to be strong in front of my Master."

"At least I'm not licking his boots like some worthless creep," Kit continued pounding at the door as she spoke, knowing that sooner or later someone would get fed up and open the door.

"I respect him," Bella sniffed.

"You're scared of him."

"My Master is very powerful."

"Which is why you kiss the ground he walks on. Because you're not powerful enough on your own." A bony hand wrapped around Kit's neck and pulled her back from the door.

"I could kill you," Bella threatened.

"Only to be killed by your Master for ruining his greatest weapon." Kit smirked despite her breathlessness.

"Greatest weapon?" Bella scoffed. "Hardly,"

"Think of how many people I can bring over to this side. You think your parents are the big dogs here. Well, they're nothing compared to mine." Kit gasped for air when Bella let her go. The door flew open and Regulus was looking down at Kit, a sick smile spread across his face.

"Your turn," he said darkly. Kit pushed herself off the ground and walked past him into the hall. He took her arm painfully and led her to the stairs.

"I think I can manage on my own," she hissed at him when he tried to walk up the stairs beside her. He let her arm go and watched her walk to what may have been the very epitome of evil. She climbed the stair slowly and walked to the end of the hall intuitively. The last door just seemed like something he would chose. She walked in and saw a simple chair in the centre of the room. The Dark Lord was standing by the window, looking out into the dark night.

"I must say, Katherine, your cousin is quite...ah...vocal. It was," he turned and searched for the right word, "invigorating." He motioned to the seat and Kit took it slowly.

"Now, down to business. We can do this the easy way," he looked askance of her and got a stony glare in return. "I was hoping for this." He pushed his sleeves back and clasped his hands behind his back.

"How does Dumbleodre protect the Hogwarts grounds?"

"Ask Fenrir, he's the one that got in." Kit stopped and gave a dry laugh. "You mean your mutt outsmarted you?"

He tensed but gave a tight smile. "I hardly think Fenrir was the brains of the operation." He took a step to her and tilted his head to consider her. "You know, you have something your cousin doesn't have. She too kind too much of the time. But you...you have a dark streak in you. It's simply delightful to think that I'll be the one to bring it out."

"You wish." Kit said simply and locked her eyes with his. "I take it you had more ask me." Kit recoiled when he stood even closer to her. He grinned down at her.

"Come now. What's business without a little pleasure," the tip of his wand trailed down her cheek and came to rest between her breasts. The corner of his mouth twitched before he pressed the wand deeper and she went flying into the opposite wall. The chair splintered in contact, little shards dusting the floor where Kit now lay. She stood as the Dark Lord came over and with a swift movement, she was back on the ground, clutching her stomach.

"Is Dumbledore creating an army against me?"

"I hope so." Kit muttered and she went flying into another wall in response.

"You really are making my job so much more enjoyable." He remarked as he strolled over. That was perhaps what bothered Kit the most. Not that she was being tossed around like a rag doll or that she knew she'd be screaming in agony by the end of the night, but that he went about it with such nonchalance. Like her life was worthless to him. In hindsight, it probably was. Kit bit down on her cheek as her head was forced back against the wall. The bang jarred through her, shaking about in her head and making the face before her go blurry.

"Tears? Already?" He shook his head in disappointment, starting back when Kit gave him a thoughtless shove. He laughed before raising his wand with a menacing smile. He uttered a single word and Kit was driven to her knees. Her lungs fought for breath they couldn't take, her skin felt like it was being torn apart. Kit bent further and clutched her head, pressing against her temples to make the ringing go away. Her bones felt like they were bending and stretching under her skin and around her muscles. But she wouldn't scream. She wouldn't give him that satisfaction.

The pain stop abruptly, leaving Kit panting on the floor, a numbness in her body that was almost as painful as the previous torture. Kit's back was hunched over, defenceless as Voldemort circled her. She didn't feel the swift pain as he sliced at her back, only the warm rush of blood. Kit scuttled away and pressed her back against the wall. Eyes still shut, she heard him walk up to her. Another burst of pain blossomed within her, forcing her eyes open. She curled in on herself, stretching and ripping the wounds on her back. Something shifted, intensified and Kit was on her hands and knees, trying to breathe. A blow drove into her stomach and a wet, gurgling sound bubbled in her throat. In the following numbness, he wrapped a hand around her ankle and carved something into her calf. Kit had read things trying to describe pain, but to try and put what she was feeling into words was impossible. The dark bliss of unconsciousness teased her from the edges of her vision but she was yanked back to painful reality before it could close around her. It was like being on the verge of sleep, knowing that in a moment you would be free of it all, then your leg jerks out and you're forced back to wakefulness. There was no feeling of being dragged down, no swimming against dark waters, only the taunting promise of passing out.

* * *

**Finally getting down to the dark stuff, huh? This is finally what Bridge and I have been working up to. It's strange to think that we're both so close to our sequel. That's right, we have a sequel planned**!

**Please let me know what you think. I love getting feed back from you guys!**

**dahlia  
**


	25. Chapter 25

Kit's life fell into a cycle. Someone would watch over her and Rose until they were called for by the Dark Lord. Kit went up without a fight, but always hesitated at the foot of the stairs. The idea of making a run for it always fluttered through her muggy, half-asleep mind as she climbed them. Her wounds never had a chance to heal before they were ripped open again, so both Rose and Kit were weak. They were being treated like animals, little food and water, kept in a cage-like room until they were called for, the taunts of the Death Eaters as they watched over them. An awful chill had settled in Kit's bones, forced there by the constant icy wind coming from the open window. The Dark Lord had run out of questions, but enjoyed their time together far too much to give them up just yet. But his patience was draining with each passing day. Kit was putting up less of a fight, showing less of a reaction. He pushed her to the extremes, tried to force a scream, a cry from her but her lips stayed locked shut. He was getting frustrated by it, the one hope Kit held onto. But the last sessions had almost broken her. She felt weak and helpless, every night having to turn to Rose for help. She should have been the one awake and talking Rosie through it all, making sure she was alright, but she could never make it that far. Her eyes usually slid shut during the questioning and she was thrown into their 'cage.' She awoke when Rose was dragged from the room and waited, forced to listen to her cousin's screams until she blacked out. That was why Kit couldn't scream or cry. She wouldn't make Rose listen to that, she had to be strong for her.

A month dragged by, the time moving unevenly as Kit went through long torture periods then blissful sleep that never seemed to last long enough. Each day it got harder and harder to bite on her tongue. Each day she closer to screaming, crying, thrashing about in response to the agony he'd put her through. She'd grown gaunt, hollow in that time. Fed little, weak from exhaustion, Kit hardly resembled the person she'd been before. She'd lost weight, making her look frail, her body was covered in bruises in every colour, her hair was limp. But worst were her eyes; bare, empty orbs that saw but never took anything in. She'd seen too much of the same to pay attention anymore. She'd seen Rosie crying beside her, she'd seen her blood splatter across the floor, her arm bent at an angle that couldn't be possible. What was the point of trying to take it in when it was always the same. But one day the door flew open and Kit was barely awake or alert enough to take the conversation in.

"Grab the blonde and clean her up. The Dark Lord is shipping her out. Says she's useless too him now." Kit simply stared at the opposite wall as her cousin was taken away, unable to conjure the strength to move. Rose's thrashing form slipped into her field of vision and Kit looked at her for a fleeting moment before her eyes slid past her, back to the wall. Rose screamed at her in Russian to not give up and to remember the ones she love, to remember James.

His name brought a deep ache to her whole body, worse than the splitting pain of the Cruciatus curse. It was a bone-deep longing for him, darkened by the knowledge that she might never see him again. She looked dejectedly down at her limp legs splayed out in front of her, bare in the cold, nipping air. Her left leg was turned in and she could see half of the grotesque scar the Dark Lord had given her on the first day. A crude version of the Dark Mark so many of his followers had. It made her sick to even look at it, so she turned her head slowly to look at the open door. It was open for her and she couldn't even conjure the will to get up and walk to it.

"He wishes to see you now." A new Death Eater said, bending to pick Kit up and half-carry her to the room at the top of the stairs. They had done away with the chair rather quickly and she was instead tossed to the floor. She pressed her cheek against the cool marble and stayed like that until he forced her to stand.

"Look at me." He ordered and Kit turned her hollow eyes to him. He frowned at her, taking in the sunken eyes and shaking hands. "You see, if you'd just answered my questions." Kit kept her mouth resolutely shut and stood by, waiting for the attacks to begin.

"This game has lost all its fun recently." His mouth turned into something that resembled a pout, but his eyes were far too excited at the thought of pushing to her the edge to have any meaning. Kit swayed on the spot for a moment, suddenly faint. She blinked and looked past the Dark Lord to where she'd seen him for a brief moment. The boy had been standing there for a fleeting instant. He looked so much like James, so much so that she let out a dry, quiet sob when she realized he wasn't there. The Dark Lord grinned triumphantly as she wrapped her arms around herself and shook.

"Finally getting through to you, am I?" He peered at her, his eyes searching her mind for some change, a sign that she'd finally given up. As he prodded her mind, Kit shifted and tried to fight the press of his mind against hers. "Not yet, then?" he asked, already having seen the answer in her mind. He raised his wand and aimed it at her head, the tip making a divot in her forehead. The pain would be numbing, blinding at the range. Kit closed her eyes, locked her mouth shut and prayed for mercy that would never come.

The wand vanished and Kit tumbled forward a step. She caught herself on her hands as he stepped over her like she was a piece of garbage.

"Katherine come here, why don't we say goodbye to your cousin." he half-turned to face her. Rose was leaving? Kit pushed herself up and grabbed a bottle from the desk, throwing at him as hard as her frail arms could manage. She growled, the sound ripping at her throat as she launched herself at him. All it took was a flick of his wand and she went flying into the wall. Kit slid down the bricks and pressed her face into her arm. She couldn't cry now, she couldn't give in, give him the pleasure of seeing her scream. But Rose was gone now.

With that thought, Kit felt the last shred of her resolve snap and before he'd taken a step towards her, she screamed. A sound of pure agony came from her lips, enough to make any sane man merciful, but not the Dark Lord. He was positively gleeful as she cried for everything she'd held in for the past month. She cried for everything Rose had been put through, relived every snap of her bones. She cried because she missed James in a way that made her heart ache. A new pain stabbed at her back and she could see him standing over her, a trail of blood slipping down his neck from where the bottle had cut him. He ignored the blood as he tortured her, enjoying to look on her face too much to consider taking his eyes from it. Pure, twisted agony. A look he'd dreamt of seeing on her face, on her father's face for years.

* * *

The empty room was cavernous now, cold without the comfort of Rose. Kit had spent too many nights alone in it, trying to tend to her own wounds, her eyes too blurry to be of any help. She was dissolving into madness, seeing the little boy everywhere. Her mind played tricks on her, let her think that James was near, that Rose or Remus or anyone would be there when she woke up. Each day she lost a bit more of her resolve. It became clearer each day that she was fighting a losing battle.

She knew nothing of the world outside the Dark Lord's office. Not of the weather, not of the people who brought her to and from their meetings. Everything beyond the door was a blur but every second inside the room was in vivid detail within her mind. But one moment was burned into her mind, something she knew she'd never be able to forget.

She'd given in.

It made her sick every time she thought about it. How weak she was, how she'd lied to everyone. She was a fraud, a fake. She'd deceived everyone into believing she was strong and would never break. What a lie that had been. He'd been driven by her new screams and cries and now pushed her further in some attempt to elicit even loud shrieks. One day, shaking and bloodied, she'd snapped.

"Fine," she'd said, her voice barely a whisper.

"Pardon?" He'd asked, as if he hadn't heard the single word he'd been waiting for. She crawled over to him, numb hands tripping along the stones. With cracked lips, she'd placed a bloody kiss against his hand. He's looked down at his hand in wonder and had lifted her up a moment later. He'd been proud, triumphant as he led her through the house. The days in the cell were gone, and now she was placed in a lush room with anything she could ever want. He was trying to buy her trust and power.

Kit sat on the edge of the massive bed, her now smooth hands shaking despite the warm fire. They hadn't stopped shaking since Rose had left. Curling them into fists, she stood and paced the room. She was so disappointed with herself, sicked by her weak choice. But to face another day of torture would have surely pushed her over the edge. Broken what little she had left. She felt sick, the luxurious meal she'd just finished sitting unpleasantly in her stomach. She almost suspected that Bellatrix had poisoned her food, but not even Bella would be stupid enough to kill the Dark Lord's newest pet. Kit picked up a beautiful glass statue, weighed it in her hands for a moment, then tossed it into the fire. Shards scattered along the grate and it made a satisfying sound as it shattered, but it didn't bring the relief she'd hoped for.

"Problem?" A smooth voice asked from her door.

"Go away, Malfoy."

"You know, if you're looking to vent a little steam, may I suggest a great option?" He asked, an annoying pleasantness in his voice. It was as if Voldemort had scared them all into being nice to her. They treated her like the ground she walked on was sacred. To her face at least; behind her back they plotted her death, ways to kill her and make it look like an accident. If it was only that easy, Kit often found herself thinking. But it wasn't, of course. Now that Kit was on his side, she had things she needed to do. Keep him away from her family and friends. Protect the ones she was closest to.

"I could bring a blood traitor up here. It's quite therapeutic..." he tried to dodge the spell Kit cast at him and reacted a moment too late and went flying down the hall.

"Quite," she murmured as she followed him out into the hall. "Don't tempt me, Malfoy." Kit warned, her wand pressed against his temple. "I suggest you watch your words around me from now on. Your death can be justified; I _am_ his favourite." She sad wryly, her mouth pulling into a grimace. But instead of being scared, Lucius just smiled at her.

"You're already changing, embracing who you are. It's in your blood, Kit." His eyes widened into horror as she flung him down the stairs. Not bothering to see if he was alright, she walked back into her room and locked the door behind her. She just made it to the washroom before she was sick.

What bothered her the most was that Rose wasn't there and she had no idea where she was, whether or not she was alive or if she was strong enough to say no. She wished to find Rose but at the same time dreaded the thought of her seeing Kit like this. Kit hadn't agreed because she had a greater plan or because she was just playing along until she had enough strength to kill Voldemort; no, she'd agreed because she was terrified of the insanity he'd threatened her with, of the death he'd promised her. She was weak and she couldn't let Rose see that.

But the Dark Lord wanted nothing but to show Rose her cousin's choice, to parade Kit around like a prized pet. She'd made up excuses, put up enough of a fight to make him hold off for a week longer, but Kit couldn't hide forever. He'd coax her out of the room if it was the last thing he did. If Rose saw what her cousin had done, she was malleable to them. Rose needed Kit, depended on her and if her hero had given in, her world would shatter.

"Katherine." He said with a knock on her door. Kit put her hand on the handle but didn't open it. "I require your presence."

"No."

"That, sadly, isn't an option." The door flew open and Kit stumbled back. He was dressed in his finest, his robes impeccable. "Get ready." He tossed a dress at her and if the circumstances had been different, it would have been funny. But Kit found nothing humourous in the dark, flowing dress he'd given her. There was something sinister about it that she couldn't place. As if agreeing to wear it to the meeting would change her moment of weakness into something permanent. It made her look frightening, her hair loose about her shoulders. She was well-fed now, no longer gaunt or shaking. The dress emphasized that, made it obvious how well she was doing now. She appeared to be in perfect health, and content with where she was so long as no one looked at her eyes. They were devoid of anything, carefully blank of any feeling. The same dreary stare met the faceless people who were waiting in the foyer. Kit walked in behind the Dark Lord and took a seat to his right. There was a murmur of surprise as she sat but Kit looked resolutely at the wall behind their heads as they bowed to him.

"Welcome all. Now before we start anything, I would like Rosalinda to come here. Regulus, get your pet up." The Dark Lord motioned to the man and a woman was thrown at their feet. Kit saw a flash of blonde hair and met the girl's gaze. The Dark Lord spoke to her, but her ice blue eyes were trained at the girl she'd once been friends with.

"No. Please no. Not her, I beg you, not her." The girl pleaded, never taking her eyes from Kit. The dark green dress she wore folding under her as she collapsed her Kit's feet. She begged her to think of her friends and family, to think of James and the people she loved. Kit couldn't meet her eyes, too disgusted with herself to make a move. But Rosalinda begged her to look down, to see her cousin and promise everything was going to be alright.

"Take her away," Kit said slowly. The room went silent, every eye locked onto Kit as she stood. "I said take her away. Leave her in my chambers." Everyone waited for the Dark Lord to say something, but Kit took another step closer to the crowd.

"He didn't give an order. I did. Do as I say." Regulus looked past Kit to the Dark Lord with a nervous grin.

"My Lord, is that wise?"

Voldemort grinned and nodded at Kit. "Completely." Kit nodded back and took Rose up to her room. She put Rose on the bed and left again before her cousin could say anything. Regulus was in hall, waiting for her.

"Go back down. Don't come back up until you're called."

"But-"

"But nothing. You've been given an order."

"You think you have so much power. You're nothing-" Regulus stopped his irate rant when Kit gave him a push down the stairs.

"Katherine!" Rose's arms wrapped around her fiercely when Kit entered the room. "I knew it was not true. You have not given in." Rose clung to her, faltering only when Kit pushed her away. "Kit, what is matter?"

"It isn't an act."

"What?"

"It's not an act. I'm not pretending." Kit couldn't look at Rose, but instead focused on the wall just beside her head.

"Of course you are." Rose said, as if Kit wasn't capable of lying to her.

"No, I'm not. I can't...I couldn't do it. I had no choice."

Rose was already shaking her head and muttering, "no, no, no," under her breath. She hugged her limp arms around herself and shook her head. "You are the strong one."

"No, I'm not Rosie. I tried..."

"You should have tried harder! Everyone's looking for you and you're going to let them see you like this! Turned into the thing you said you hated most!"

"What good am I to anybody dead, Rose! Answer me that!"

"He wouldn't kill you,"

"You don't believe that. What good am I half-crazed because of the Cruciatus curse?"

"What good are you to our friends if you've become one of them?"

"Alive. Sane." The cold facade began to crack, her eyes flickering to Rose's face for a moment.

"You cannot be sane if you've given in! Kit, this isn't who you are!"

"What if it is, Rose? What if I am just like him? It seems to come rather naturally to me." There was a dangerous, dark humour somewhere in her words. She closed her eyes and took another step away from Rose.

"How could you say that?" Rose asked, her voice small and hurt.

"I'm alive aren't I? Well-fed, sane? If I'd truly been against it, I'd be dead. At my own hand or his, but I would be. And I'm not. What other explanation is there?"

"This is in act so you can get away!"

"Even if I could fool the Dark Lord, which I can't, what would the point be? He'd have me caught and killed before I could leave this mansion."

"This isn't true..."

"What do you want me to say, Rose? Lie and tell you everything will be fine? Lull you into a sense of security but tear it away a moment later? Even you can't be that naive."

"What about James? And your parents? What about me, Kit? What happens to us when you're gone? I need you, you are the strong one. I can't do this alone..."

"You've made it this far. You don't need me. My parents will understand. James..." Kit stopped, feeling the familiar ache in her chest. "He'll move on." That thought pained her too much to say. But she wasn't the same now. She may have still hated her decision, but it was irreversible now. She had to forget her old life or be plagued by painful memories of what everyone had expected of her. She walked quickly over to the door and pulled it open.

"Leave."

"What?"

"Leave. Go. Now!" Kit grabbed her cousin's wrist and yanked her to the door.

"Kit, please, no, not like this! This isn't you!" Kit slammed the door shut on Rose and locked the door. No doubt Regulus was lurking somewhere close by and was ready to take Rose home. Kit fell onto her bed and held her head between her hands.

* * *

Kit looked out her window out onto the defrosting grass. It had been too long since that night at Hogwarts, months even. It had been nearly as long since she'd seen Rose. After their last meeting, Kit had requested that she and Rose not cross paths again. It was for the best, she assumed. But in that time, with no outside force to remind her of who she was and what she was supposed stand up for, Kit began to lose herself to the darker side. With no one to remind her of her morals, only a man who saw the power she held and the purity of her blood. She'd gone through a period of time where she'd been cool and distant from everyone, too disgusted with herself to make any contact, but she was coaxed from her room and now her eyes held that spark of life, that dark intensity that came with power. She had power now, she could boss around the young Death Eaters and had instilled enough fear into some of the older ones to make them do what she wanted. Her new found power was exhilarating to a point where Kit wondered if she'd been craving it for her whole life. Perhaps this was her calling, after all. It suited her so well. She smiled out across the landscape and took a sip of expensive coffee. She snapped her fingers and a house elf appeared at her side.

"Inform my master that I wish to meet with him." She said.

"Of course, mistress." The faint pop signalled her departure and Kit was left alone again to wander the large room. She walked slowly over to her closet and frowned at the clothes there, or lack thereof. The perfect excuse.

"He will see you now." The house elf said from the door. Kit smiled into her mug; he was always so prompt.

"I wish to visit Diagon Alley." She stated when the door of his study closed behind her.

"What for?" He asked nonchlantly, not looking up from his papers. It was strange to see him looking through papers , a task so mundane that it was ill-suited for a man of such power.

"What are you doing?" She asked him while taking a seat opposite him. He lowered the page he was looking at and pursed his lips.

"Looking for people."

"What sort of people?"

"Ministry people that can be of use. Unfortunately, my greatest asset hasn't attended a single meeting." He frowned at Kit as he spoke of her mother. Kit shook her head and looked about the room.

"That's quite out of my hands, Master."

He sighed and tilted his head. "I'm aware." He reached across the desk and held her chin. "You look quite like your mother."

"I would stay and help, but I've been here for some time and have yet to get any robes save for the ones I was given months ago. A trip to Diagon Alley would be very useful."

"Of course. Be back by nightfall, I have a surprise for you." Kit returned his smile and bowed as she left the room. She walked into the foyer, took a handful of Floo Powder and travelled back to Diagon Alley. It was a chilly day in March, but the frost had stopped clinging to the windows. Kit ducked into the first robes store she could find and bought the warmest ones she saw. A long, thick felt jacket with fur lining, a floppy wool cap and warm kid gloves kept her the chill out.

"How will you be paying for this?" The woman asked at the desk.

"Ruskova. I have an account at Gringotts." The woman nodded and Kit went shrugged her purchases on. She needed some proper clothes, not just dress robes and outerwear. She hated shopping as well, but it needed to be done. After getting some money from the bank, she saw an expensive clothing shop at the end of the road and headed into it. The young witch asked if she needed any help and Kit pressed a galleon into her hand. Giving her her measurements, Kit told her to buy what she thought was best and that she'd be back in a hour to pick the clothes up. Meanwhile, Kit sat in the warmth of the tavern and drank lazily from a mug of Butterbeer.

Diagon Alley was filled with students of every age, wanting to get new things before classes started up again. Kit watched them from her table and frowned at them. That was what she should have been doing. A bunch of kids walked into the tavern and took a table not far from her. Four boys, each too rowdy for the quiet bar. A low ache of remembrance went through her and she tossed her money onto the table before leaving. She couldn't be around those boys, it brought back too many memories. It had only been three months, but it felt like a lifetime. She was a different person now. She walked into the Apothecary simply because no teenager willingly went into it. It provided her with a moment of solace to recover form something that had had much too much of an impact on her.

"Never thought I'd see you in here," she remarked dryly and Kit looked up to see Severus standing at the end of the aisle. "Not getting supplies for class, I assume."

"No. I'm not." Kit found herself smiling at him.

"They got to you?"

"I realized the truth,"

"You really believe that?" He asked. He walked towards her and looked down at her. "What have they made you do?"

"They've given me power, they've shown me what impurities lie within the weak. They brought a man in last week, he worked in the Muggle Protection sector of the Ministry. He was a sympathizer." Kit spat the word out and shook her head. "He realized the error of his ways."

"You watched him get tortured." Severus said and lowered his eyes when she nodded. "You don't seem upset."

"I'm not. I watch as he got what he deserved."

"You certainly not the girl from Hogwarts." He said slowly. Kit smiled wryly at him.

"You mean I'm not the same girl who was taken from her friends and family to be shoved in a cell and pushed to her breaking point until she was forced to agree? No, I'm not the same girl. I was naive, foolish. I...I like the power." She confided in him quietly. "I crave it. I'm needed by him. It's empowering to be needed by someone so powerful."

He leaned against the shelves and crossed his arms. "I can understand that. I can also understand that the Dark Lord can be very...persuasive." He shared a dark look with her and she nodded. "But what I can't understand is how you cut off all ties with the rest of the world."

"It's easier this way. I can't be caught between who I was and who I am now. It's too painful."

"I understand. Well, you may want to leave if that's the case. Potter and his friends are in the Alley. I can imagine that crossing paths with them would be quite painful."

Kit looked out the window and saw a familiar mop of black hair pass by. She clenched her hands and nodded at Severus.

"Quite." She pulled her hat lower over her face and tugged her collar higher up before walked back to the clothing shop. She brushed past Remus on her way and didn't stop to apologize. The group walked away, but James was staring after her.

"I'll meet up with you," he said distractedly. He followed the short woman to the clothing store and waited for her to come out. As she stepped onto the street, he caught a glimpse of a snub nose peeking out from under her hat.

"Kit," he whispered. The woman whipped around to face him and he saw the brown eyes he'd spent days staring at. She turned and ran off. "Kit!" He took off after her. Oh, Merlin, she was alive. He'd known she wasn't dead. All the others had given up, but he knew. He could feel it.

"Kit!" She turned down an alleyway and tossed a cauldron into the street to stop him. He grabbed her and pressed her against the alley wall.

"Why are you running?" He asked breathlessly. She couldn't look away from him, his eyes, his pink nose. Her mouth fell open as she stared at him. "Kit, I was so worried. We thought you were dead." He pulled her to him, but she shoved him back.

"No. No, I can't."

"Wha-?" James asked, reaching for her. She brandished her wand and shook her head.

"Get away from me." Kit aimed a spell at him and dove into a store. Grabbing a handful of Floor Powder, she jumped into the fireplace. She was breathless as she stepped into the familiar foyer. He was waiting for her with his back turner, but Kit could only see his silhouette. She gasped for breath, each gulp of air sending a sharp pain through her chest. The new clothes fell to the ground and into the ash, but Kit couldn't sense anything past the burn in her heart.

"Did something upsetting happen?" the Dark Lord asked quietly. "Not trying to run from me, I hope."

"N-no sir. Never, my lord. I only...I..." she fought to find the words to explain how she felt, what had happened. Seeing James, so much she'd remembered put her through too much pain. It had triggered something. She could feel a thought creeping into her head, sneaking into her subconscious like a snake. She second-guessed every action she'd made in the past three months.

"Katherine?" He asked.

Kit shook her head and faced him. "I'm ready."

"Ready?" He repeated, but he knew exactly what she meant. She'd outright refused to torture another person. She watched the questioning, sat through a person's scream, but would never raise her wand or lay a hand on them. Evidently, whatever had upset Kit was enough to make her doubt who she was. Curious, he reached into her mind and saw Potter. A cruel smile spread across his lips as he nodded. "Of course. Go get ready, we will be waiting in the meeting room when you are ready." He spun and walked off, excitement tingling in every vein.

Kit walked up the stairs and pushed open the door to her room with her hip. She was wound up, on edge because of that single thought that had shaken her. The things she'd sworn by before this, that she would never give in, that this wasn't who she was, came back with a vengeance upon seeing James' face. Irritated, Kit picked out the first thing she found in the bag and threw it on. A pair of smart black slacks and a deep purple silk blouse. With the look in her eye and her long, dark hair pulled back she looked like every other high ranking Death Eater; ready to kill. The click of her new shoes echoed through the halls and she could hear the muted conversations stop altogether when she entered the room. Voldemort stood with the other Death Eaters in a circle, all blocking Kit's view of what was waiting for her in the centre. He saw her and beckoned her over.

"Katherine. May I be the first to say that we are ecstatic that you are going through with this stage in your initiation." Kit nodded once and moved past him and into the circle. He was shocked for a moment at her brusqueness but was watching the scene unfold with glee a moment later.

Kit looked down at the people waiting their punishment, her eyes dark and cold. Her knuckles cracked as they tightened around her wand.

"Kit," Remus said, his warm eyes seeking mercy. Kit's eyes tore away from James and she glared at him. "Take the others away. Leave the half-breed." She instructed slowly. The others yelled in protest, thrashing as they were taken away. They shouted at her to remember, words that meant little to her now.

"Kit, this isn't you! You know this isn't!"

"Stop!" Kit told the two brutes that were leading the boys out. James nearly sagged with relief, believing that he'd gotten through to her.

"Put them here," she pointed to the three seats that lined the shortest wall. The Death Eaters parted to let her by and she sat each of the boys in a chair. Muttering under her breath, she froze them to the seats. "Front row seats." She told them slowly before turning back to her first victim.

"Hello," she said pleasantly enough, circling him like he was her prey. "I must say that I'm quite surprised with my master's choice of people. Impressed as well." She stood behind him and put her hands on his shoulder as she faced the three onlookers. "And here I thought The Marauders were undefeatable, unstoppable. It's interesting how bold people are until they see true power."

"Is that what you have? True power?" Sirius spat at her, straining against his bonds.

"You'd be wise to shut your mouth, Black." Kit hissed. "I think Remus should serve as an example, don't you?" She trailed the tip of her wand down his cheek, a cold amusement lurking in her eyes. "For every stupid thing Black says, this little mutt gets a taste of that true power. We all know Sirius can't restrain himself." There was a ripple of laughter through the crowd as Kit looked at Sirius, daring him to say something else. The laughter died as Kit stepped back and aimed her wand at the shaking boy. There was an intake of breath before Kit fired a spell at him and watching him go flying into the crowd. He groaned loudly as they pushed him back violently, not missing a chance to kick him or commit some other bodily harm. Just as he came back into view, Kit sent him flying back.

"What was that for?" Sirius yelled at her.

"For being a half-breed. And this is for you're little outburst." Kit grabbed Remus's collar and pressed her wand into his neck. Orange light seeped through his body and he shook violently, his back arching in pain.

"Let him go!" Sirius shouted at her and with a single sweeping motion, Kit switched Remus for Sirius.

"Sirius Black." Kit slashed at his cheek with her wand. "Where to begin? You're a blood traitor, a disgrace to your family, you're pig-headed, vain, inconsiderate and thick-skulled. Eight years I've been waiting to do this." Kit watched as he clenched his fists, squeezing them against his legs. "You want to fight me? By all means, take a wand, if you must." Kit bowed slightly with her hand out. Sirius took a step forward, his hand raised as he pulled his fist back. But he couldn't go through with him.

"Compassion. Disgusting." She leapt forward and sent Sirius to his knees with a spell. She aimed a kick at his ribs. "Come on, you're just going to sit back? You used to be a fighter! Did my up-tight cousin rub off on you? That bitch changed you didn't she?" Sirius grabbed her leg and pulled her down. Kit screamed and shoved her wand into his side.

"Cruico!" There was a stunned silence at her choice of spell and as Sirius twitched on the ground. Kit found herself yelling at him. "Yell, scream, dammit! Cry like a baby! You can't suffer in silence forever, everyone has a breaking point!" He had to make some sound, if only to reassure her that she wasn't the only one who'd broken. "Or do you think you can deal with the pain? What if you saw your best friend writhing in agony? Or your precious little Rose?" Kit knew that was what would send him over the edge. "Get her."

"Excuse me?" Regulus asked, breathless from seeing his older bother tossed around like a rag doll.

"Get Rosalinda." She never broke eye contact with Sirius, wanting to see that sudden moment of realization that she wasn't joking. But it never came; instead he started laughing. She took the curse off of him and watched as he shook with laughter.

"Shut up!" She hissed at him, kicking him in the ribs until blood bubbled at the corners of his mouth. But he was still laughing at her. She grabbed him and pulled him to his feet. "What the fuck is so funny, huh? I'm going to kill your best friend in front of you and make you watch. Then I'm going to get that cunt you're in love with and make her scream for mercy." She threatened him, her nostrils white and flared. A hushed silence fell over them save for Sirius's laughter.

"You think this is a fucking joke?" Kit pushed him back and grabbed James from his seat. Holding him in place, she stabbed her wand into his chest. "Cruico!" James fell to his knees and clutched his head. While he was still under the curse, Kit slashed at his exposed back the way the Dark Lord had so many weeks ago. "Still think this is funny?" Kit released James from the curse but caught him before he fell to the ground. Finding a deep gash in his side, she shoved her wand into it, smiling when he screamed. She tossed James aside and stalked over to Sirius.

"This isn't a joke or an act. This is who I am, who I've always been. It's pathetic that you all think a few words will bring back the weak person I was before. It's a wasted effort."

"Your parents-" Remus said and Kit silenced him with a quick curse.

"My parents are weak and too stuck in their ways to see that this is what is right, this is who we are. You think we're the bad one but you prey on people like Peter," she grabbed the stout blond by the hair and dragged him to the centre. "Weak, defenceless, too scared to make their own choices. We embrace them, show them the light. You mocked him, brought him to tears, ignored him." Kit shoved Peter into a Death Eaters arms and waved a hand at the three bloodied boys on the ground. "They'll never treat you properly. They'll always see you as weak and easily manipulated. But we will teach you, treat you like one of our own. You could have everything. Women, money, anything you wanted."

"D-d-do you have that stuff?" Peter asked quietly.

"All of it." To prove her point, Kit reached into the crowd and took Malfoy's hand.

"No," James muttered, his voice barely above a whisper. Kit slid her hand up Lucius's arm and pulled his lips down to meet hers. He'd been pleasant to her before she'd crossed over and had been obviously attracted to her now that she was on his side. Lucius had more than once visited her room. He ravished her now, knowing how it upset Potter. His slid his hands down the smooth line of her waist, hands slipping across the slick silk. James lunched him at the two, but Kit flicked her wand at him and sent him back. She pulled away from Lucius and faced Peter.

"What do you say, Peter? A lifetime of mocking and cruelty or a life filled with power and desire?" He thought deeply about it, his face growing red in the process. But at last he look up at her and shook his head.

"No."

"What did you say?" Kit was before him in an instant, grabbing his throat and daring him to speak again.

"No," he squeaked. Kit tossed him aside and crouched to look James in the eye.

"Congratulations, you've got a spineless, fat, idiot on your side."

"At least he didn't break. he didn't get fooled by the promise of power. _He_ didn't cave in and give the Dark Lord exactly what he wanted. _He_ was strong." James stared into her eyes as he spoke, seeing how the words affected her. Kit stood quickly and stalked away from them.

"Get them out of here." She order before walking out the door. James' words had been perfectly clear; Peter Pettigrew, a spineless being was able to withstand the promise of power. He was stronger than she was. That ate away at her to no end. The fact that Peter hadn't been tortured didn't register with her, only that someone as talentless as Peter Pettigrew had withstood what she couldn't. It made her livid and disgusted at the same time. She slammed the door to her room shut like some petulant child and didn't come out until the sun had set.

Kit heard the house settle and go quiet as everyone left and went back to their homes. She heard the door to her Master's room shut and she rose slowly from her bed. She slid her shoes off and padded down the stairs to the basement. She could see a light shine from underneath the metal door and when the stair creaked under her foot, the light went out. Of course they'd be put in there. Kit unlocked the door and shut it quietly behind her.

"Do you know how long I was in here?" Kit took a step forward. "A month. A month of being treated like an animal." She spoke quietly and slowly, unable to see them in the dark.

"We'll get you out of here, Kit. This isn't where you need to be." James said earnestly.

"You're just like Rose. She thought it was an act too. It's not, James. It's truly not."

"Rose is safe," Sirius said hoarsely. Kit whipped around to face him.

"Rose is safe?" She asked, something tugging at her heart.

"Yes, she's safe. You'll be too, we can get you out. This isn't you, Kit. I know it isn't." James found her hands in the dark and held them in his own. "I know it's hard to see now, but this isn't who you are, I know it isn't. You didn't have a choice, you were forced into this..." James whispered soothingly, but Kit was shaking her head. She stood quickly and held the door open.

"Leave. Go back to wherever you're staying." Kit pointed out the door and waited for them to move. When none of them did, she pushed Sirius out. "I don't want to see you again. Go!" It was too hard to have them here, even if she wanted nothing more than to hurt them, tear them apart. They all brought too much of her past life back to the forefront of her mind. It hurt her too much to hear the hope in their voices. It brought back too many aches that she couldn't explain of define.

"We won't leave you here." James grabbed her arm but Kit twisted out of it.

"No. I don't want to leave. This isn't an act, I am that person. For Merlin's sake, James, I just tortured you! I cut your back open, I forced you to watch as I hurt your best friend. Why are you still trying?"

"Because I love you and I know this isn't who you are." James tried to hold her, to press a kiss against her lips, but Kit ducked out of the way and pointed up the stairs.

"Go before he wakes up." They all gave her a final look before creeping up the stairs. Kit collapsed and brought her knees to her chest. She cried until her ribs hurt, not knowing why she was crying, only that she couldn't stop.

* * *

**This chapter is over 7000 words. And interestingly enough it didn't take that long to write. I really got into a groove writing this chapter. Kit's transformation makes sense in my mind and I'm rather hoping that it translates easily to you. Beneath everything, Kit needs power, she's drawn to it. She needs people to need her and Voldemort truly needs her. She hates herself for the choice in the beginning but over time she begins to see things differently. Not unlike Stockholm Syndrome. Let me know what you think, if it came across the right way.**

**I've written a few short scenes that are part of the story but are told from a different perspective and I was thinking of posting them as another story. If any of you are interested, send me a messages or review and let me know.  
**


	26. Chapter 26

Seeing James, Sirius, Peter and Remus so suddenly after having lost them for so long had jarred her. What they had said shook her even more and she doubled her efforts to get them out of her mind. She tortured anyone her Master brought in without remorse, afraid of what would happen if she let that little fear take root. Instead, she went through the motions and took out any anger or fear on the cowering people at her feet. The Dark Lord told her one day that with the exception of himself, she was the youngest person to do such things to another person. Kit had been proud of that fact, she still was. To be so young, but still instill such fear into people. She stood at the balcony that looked out onto a grand expanse of green. No other buildings, no other house, just grass as far as she could see. She'd found out early on that this was Malfoy Manor. With the way things were turning out, she'd own this place in a few months. Lucius was being quite friendly as Kit grew darker and darker. Lucius would be easy to control once they were married. He was distracted by sex and expensive things. He could have as many mistress as he wanted and between the two of them, he could buy every house between here and Canada if he desired. Kit heard the sound of someone crying and knew that her Master was questioning another Ministry employee. Ever since her mother had left, it had been difficult for him to get the leverage he needed with the Ministry and he hadn't found a replacement since. Kit leaned against the railing and watched the wind move along the grass. Lucius came up beside her and covered her hand with his.

"Enjoying the view?"

"It's a beautiful house."

"That's to say nothing of the people inside of it," he joked and drew her close to him. Kit looked up at him, his white-blonde hair loose around his face. She pushed a strand back and shrugged.

"It's alright, I suppose." She smiled up at him and rolled her eyes when he looked hurt. "A joke, Lucius."

"I'm aware," he said dryly and he spun her away from the window. "Would you like to stay here?"

"Permanently?"

"Of course,"

"Yes," Kit said and Lucius was reaching down to kiss her when a Death Eater called up the stairs.

"The barrier's been broken!" McNair shouted, his voice high with panic. Kit ran from Lucius and to the window and saw nine figures quickly making their way to the mansion. Swearing, she ran down the stairs and burst into the questioning room.

"Sir, the west barrier has been broken." Kit withdrew quickly, but heard his roar of anger. She drew her wand and went to the front door, calling every Death Eater that Apparated to action. "Linton, Clint and Jackson, keep the ones downstairs from getting out. Black -all of you- with me. Malfoy, you as well. Everyone else, guard the house. I don't want a single one of them near here, got it?" The masked faces nodded and Kit affixed her own mask before running out to meet them. She knew who they were from a distance. James, Sirius, Peter and Remus, her parents, McGonagall, Flitwick and Dumbledore. Kit charged at them, Death Eaters at her side and they were all knocked off their brooms in a matter of seconds. Hell broke loose as the battle began, Dumbleodre having taken out three of them in a single swipe. Thankfully new Death Eaters were landing every second and soon they had nearly double as many Death Eaters. Curses flew everywhere, Kit caught Sirius with a slicing curse, Remus with a burn and tried to disarm McGonagall. It was strange to fight against people she'd once admired, but she did and to her surprise sent McGonagall flying. As she was fighting with her old Transfiguration teacher, Malfoy called out to her.

"Behind you!" Kit spun to see her father staring down at her, his wand shaking and his face white.

"Katherine, don't make me do this." He pleaded with her, but Kit's wand didn't falter as she lifted it. Now level with his chest, she hesitated for a moment too long and was disarmed in the instant. James caught her wand and grabbed her. He started to pull her away, grabbing a bag Dumbledore had dropped along the way.

"NO!" Kit screamed and kicked at him as he pulled her away. Lucius fell before Sirius, and Remus was backing Regulus into the house. They were being beaten! Kit screeched and clawed at James, but he held onto her and with his arm still wrapped around her, he grabbed the tea kettle from the bag. Kit felt a tugging in her stomach and tumbled down a moment later in the living room of the Potter's house.

"How could you?" Kit yelled at him and punched every bit of him she could reach. He still had her wand, so she was forced to use her hands to tear at him. She scratched at his face, kicked him and dug her nails into his cheek until she drew blood. She pushed him to the ground and wretched her wand from his hand. She pressed it against his neck and pinned him down.

"I'll kill you!" She warned him. His glasses were cracked and dented, but behind them his hazel eyes were dark with fury.

"How could I? Kit you were drowning back there! You didn't even know who you were!"

"I know who I am, who I'm supposed to be! And it isn't some sap sitting in a classroom, patiently waiting for someone else to do the work. I'm not some bleeding heart, James. You saw that!"

"I saw you do something to please your new Master." He spat the word out, disgusted that she had ever used it.

"I did it because I liked it!"

"Oh, you enjoy torturing me? Tell me, did you enjoy Malfoy as well?" James was furious, his lips pressed into a thin with line. He pushed her off of him and stood abruptly. "I risked my life trying to save you!"

"I didn't want to be saved! Merlin! Everyone has it in their head that I'm some sort of perfect child, that I couldn't have any darkness in me. I do! I am evil! I'm a monster!" Kit shouted at him. Popping noises around her signalled the arrival of the others and Kit shoved away from her parents as they came to embrace her. "Don't touch me." She hissed at them.

"Katherine, I know what you're going through." Luka began, but Kit raised her wand at him.

"You don't. None of you do. If you knew you'd see that I DIDN'T WANT TO BE SAVED!"

"You may not have wanted it but you needed it!" Sirius said.

Kit stormed over to him and grabbed a fistful of his hair. "I cursed all of you, I made you watch as I cut his back open, I used an Unforgivable Curse on both of you. How can I be saved? Hmm, Black, how is there any chance of saving me now?"

"Miss Ruskova," Dumbledore began quietly, but his voice was stern as he spoke. "We have all risked a great deal to rescue you, whether you believe you needed it or not. Please remember that."

"Please remember that you've all put a death sentence over my head. Do you think I'll be able to explain myself to my Master if we cross paths again? He's not going to accept that I was taken!" Kit threw her hands up and walked to the front door.

"Where are you going?" Remus asked and Kit saw, for the first time, her cousin cowering in fear at his side.

"Back home, mutt." Kit spat. "Where people don't make decisions for me." Kit stopped and spun back around. "You know, this isn't the first time you've all made some choice that you thought was best without even thinking about what I wanted. Do you have some higher knowledge that I don't know about? Do you know what's best for me?Shouldn't _I_ be the ones making the choices about my life?" Kit whipped around and slammed her fist into the door frame.

Kit didn't see the spell coming, but she heard Rose say, "Stupefy!" a she was out a moment later.

* * *

Kit felt trapped, unbelievably so as everyone in the house took their turns watching her. As if they expected her to do something drastic at any moment. It was maddening to be treated like a child when she had long since moved on from needing supervision. They all treated her as if she had a disease and couldn't look after herself. They kept telling her that she'd get better soon, as if this was just some virus that would be flushed out of her system eventually. They'd taken her wand away from her, afraid of what she would do with it and she was forced to spend every minute inside.

"I've spent the better part of four months holed up in a house, can I please go outside?" Kit asked Luka one morning. It had been a two weeks since they'd rescued her and it was now Easter break. Dumbledore had assured them that they should each take as much time as they needed before going back to school.

"No, because last time you went outside you nearly killed your own father." He said dryly, not looking up from his paper.

"I'm not some sick child, I'm not bedridden with disease! Let me go!" Kit pounded her fist against the table and stood. Luka nodded at James, who tried to restrain her. It wasn't the first time she'd suddenly lashed out and they all knew the signs.

"You can't go out, not until you're better," James tried soothingly and Kit shoved away from him.

"I'm not sick! I won't 'get better'! If I'd said I'd killed someone, would you be like this? Or would have just given up hope, known that I was a lost cause? It's still an Unforgivable Curse, it's still a part of who I am!" Kit stormed off and James hesitated before following her. She slammed the door shut and James gave them an encouraging smile.

"I'll keep an eye on her," he said quickly before slipping out the door. Kit was stalking out to the forest the lined the back of the house, desperate to find some solace. She felt like a Herbology project, being watched and monitored every second. Her Master had never treated her this way; she was free to do as she pleased. Kit walked as deep into the forest as she could, until she couldn't see the house anymore and the only sounds she heard were the ones of nature. She sunk down and wrapped her arms around her knees. She didn't want to think about anything, only relish in the fresh air, but the same thoughts came to the forefront of her mind. What she'd done to those people, who she'd made scream and cry, beg her for mercy. And suddenly, finally, with no one else around Kit felt something snap.

She'd tortured someone. She'd brought someone's child to the edge, made them go through exactly what he'd put her through. She'd cut open her best friend, the man she loved, she'd tried to kill her own father. She let a shaky breath out and screwed her eyes shut. She'd been pleasing her Master, she'd been doing what she was supposed to be doing. They'd been blood traitors, half-breeds, mudbloods. They'd deserved it. But did any of that justify her actions? What had happened to the girl who'd fought tooth and nail against the Dark Lord's plans? Had that even been her or was that just who her parents had wanted her to be? How could she deny who she'd become if such dark thoughts and curses came so naturally to her.

"Kit?"

"Go away James," Kit said, trying to force the sound of tears out of her voice.

"Kit, please."

"James, what can you say that I haven't heard before? It's the same thing every day; this isn't you, you had no choice, you'll get better. I'm sick of it."

"Kit, I know it's easier for you to just push everyone away, but we need you now. Everyone's worried."

Kit scoffed and shook her head. "No, they're pissed off that I haven't been fixed yet."

"They may not show it, but they are. We all know this isn't who you are-"

"What if it is, James? I nearly killed someone, I attacked my family, I...I hurt you." Kit ran a hand through her hair and swore. "He made it seem so natural, like I'd been meant to do this my whole life."

"He worms his way into people's heads, you had no choice. You were forced to agree. Kit, please, look at me." He sat in front of her and held her face when she tried to look away. "When you disappeared, we were frantic. We looked everywhere, Sirius tried everything. But we couldn't find you anywhere. The whole school was helping to look for you, teachers and students giving up their break to help find you and Rose. But after a month people started to lose hope. I-I couldn't accept that. But each day it felt like you were fading a little more from our lives." He took a breath and behind his glasses, tears were beginning to cling to his lashes.

"Two months and nothing, not a sign of you anywhere. And then Sirius found Rose. The state she was in... but all I could think about was you, alone, going through the same thing with no one to help you. When Rose tried to talk about you she'd close up and refuse to say anything else. I-I thought you were dead." He was crying now, tears rolling freely down his cheeks. He held her hands and squeezed them. "I don't know what I would have done if you were dead. I need you, Kit. Everyone does, but I can't think straight when you're not around. The thought that you were dead was - I couldn't - I can't live without you."

"Why are you telling me this?" Kit asked.

"Because I want you to know that whatever happens, whoever you think you are, I'll always be here." James opened his arms and Kit crawled to lie against him. It felt foreign after so long, but familiar at the same time, like it triggered a memory at the back of her mind.

"What if I am evil?" Kit asked quietly, her face pressed against his chest.

"Then we'll all be here to teach you differently. But, Kit, I don't believe that's true." He ran his hand through her hair as she started to cry, rocking her gently. She was crying for everything she'd done, every person she'd hurt, every doubt and insecurity. He just held onto her as she shook and knew that they were one step closer to getting the old Kit back.

* * *

Kit sat on the floor of the living room, textbooks spread out around her and she chewed on the end of a quill as Dumbledore walked in.

"Miss Ruskova, how are you feeling?" He asked as he sat on the couch.

"Better. It's been difficult. I'm still revolted by some of the things I did. It's not easy, but I'm getting there." Kit put her quill down and pushed the Charms textbook away from her.

"That's good to hear. However, I am here to speak with all of you. If you could please get the others." He waved his hand at her and she went to the hall and called for them.

"Hi, Professor," Sirius said as he walked in with Rose by his side. James entered and gave Kit a quick kiss before sitting beside her. Remus and Peter sat on the floor near Kit and they all looked up at the man who'd seen them far too many times in his office.

"Due to recent events, none of you have been able to attend Hogwarts and thus have not been able to keep up with your studies. Miss Ruskova has been trying to finish her studies, but it is evident that two months will not be enough time."

"Are we not going to graduate?" Remus asked.

"Yes, you are, Mr Lupin. However you will be graduating two months after the rest of the school. You are welcome to came back and continue your studies there, but you will have individual classes with each professor in order to graduate."

"So, we can go back?" Kit asked quietly and felt every pair of eyes fall upon her. Granted, it probably wasn't the smartest idea, what with Lucius and Regulus within cursing distance. But Kit missed Hogwarts and the feeling of safety it gave her. She twirled a strand of hair between her fingers.

"Do you think that's smart?" Sirius asked slowly and Kit rolled her eyes.

"I'm not a fucking invalid, Pads." She caught herself and squeezed her eyes shut. "Sorry," she mumbled. It wasn't like she tried to be a jerk, but every so often things would sneak back into her system. That was to say nothing of the fact that they were all still looking at her as if they were waiting for her to lash out. She'd come close a few times, but thankfully she'd kept everything in check.

But she couldn't wait to get back to school and rip Malfoy's head from his scrawny neck.

Kit frowned at herself as the others talked around her and doodled on her page. Maybe it was harder than it looked to just get back to normal. Kit watched a poorly drawn face start to take form in the corner of her page. Dark eyes, a twisted smile, a short curl of dark hair. The face of the Dark Lord looked up at her and she hastened to fold the page before anyone saw. Her hands curled into fists and she felt the sharp sting of her nails bite into her palms. James looked over at her, his brow creased but she shook her head at him.

"I think, with everything that has happened, it may be safer in own homes." Rose said and Kit looked up at her.

"What?" she asked, but the question was ignored and instead the Headmaster said that he would make the arrangements. Kit watched as Sirius rambled on about homework and as the others laughed at him. But Kit stayed rooted to her spot as she mind worked slowly. She wasn't going back to Hogwarts, she wasn't going to see Malfoy or Regulus again. And instead of being happy, she was furious that she wouldn't be able to throttle them, wring their necks, make them scream and cry. Kit narrowed her eyes at a spot on the carpet. She was going to find them. Even as she sat there thinking, she could feel the want snaking into her veins. She wanted to find the, she wanted to hurt them. Kit stood suddenly and left the room quickly. James caught her in the hallway and held her close.

"Kit, don't. You'll regret it."

"No, I won't."

"Please Kit, don't do it. Kit," James said her name over and over again soothingly, pressing a kiss just beneath her jaw, feeling her pulse flutter against his lips. He kissed her fully on the mouth and held her face. "Please, Kit. Please," she took a shuddering breath, waiting for the heat to leave her veins and was frustrated when it didn't. Kit shook her head and tried to wriggle free but James held onto her. "I'm not letting you go," he told her.

"I'm going upstairs."

"Then I'm coming with you."

"Do I need an escort everywhere?" Kit continued her efforts to get away from him but it was useless battle. He was almost a foot taller than her and now at eighteen, he'd lost any resemblance to a boy. He was all tough muscle now, long, hard sinews kept in top form by years of Quidditch. Kit had withered in her time away, being gaunt and shaking in the winter. There had been a period of time when she'd been back to normal but since coming back to her house, she'd dropped weight again. Between trying to catch up with her studies, being disgusted with herself, throwing tantrums and being watched like a ticking dungbomb there wasn't a lot of time to eat.

"Evidently," James frowned and hoisted her over his shoulder. Kit screamed and pounded her fists against his back. James carried her up the stairs and pushed the door to her room open with his foot. Kit yelled when he tossed her onto the bed and looked up at him through her messy hair as he kicked the door shut and crawled to kneel above her. He brushed the hair out of her face and kissed her softly.

"Don't think this doesn't mean I'm not still pissed," Kit told him when he pulled back. He shrugged and pressed his lips against her neck.

"I'll settle for distracted." He said as he traced the line of her jaw with light kisses.

* * *

**Hey! Long time no see, huh? Well, life got hectic, but you'll be glad to know that I have a few more chapters already written and I'm posting them tonight. Once their edited, of course. **

**I'd like to give a thank you to artsandlife. Thanks for reviewing and everything else! It's great to know that people like this fic. Especially after so long of no updating :P**

**Dahlia  
**


	27. Chapter 27

**Warning: Sexual themes and coarse language**

* * *

The time had passed quickly, oddly enough. Kit found she was spending most of her time at the Potter's house, wrapped up with James as they tried to do their homework. But Kit was willing to bet that she and James were getting more done than Sirius and Rose. She'd at least managed to finish all her Defense homework and Charms studies within a month. It was strange to read her Defense textbook and see the counter spells to some of the things she'd used on someone, but James was always there if she needed a distraction. Kit often found herself wondering when it had all started. What had triggered the recent events in her life? Her life at Hogwarts before her cousin had been uneventful - or as uneventful as life ever could be with the Marauders - but it had never been dangerous. Her parents went out a few nights a month and Kit would spend the night at James' house. It had never seemed odd, only something of habit. The closest thing they'd ever come to danger was when Remus transformed and even then Kit was far from the danger. And besides a score of rough Quidditch matches, she'd never been hurt. Well, there had been a few fights between her the other houses, but that usually ended with someone with donkey's ears and some strategically placed boils. Then Rose had come to Hogwarts because she'd had enough with the Dark Arts, something with which Kit could now identify. Dating Eric was a minor bump in the road in retrospect. Then they'd found out about the Dark Lord and what their families really did. Who they were supposed to be. That was when everything had started spiralling out of control.

Suddenly, she remembered a conversation from the previous year. She'd been sitting up with Remus just before the full moon.

_"Why did you tell Rose I was a monster?"_

_"I can't believe you're bringing that up. You're not a monster," Kit had the same argument with him every few months. Everyone had the same argument with him every few months._

_"I am. Kit, I am."_

_"How? How on earth could you be a monster? You stay far away from any humans when you change, you take every precaution. You bite yourself for Merlin's sake!"_

_"I'm murderous! I have a craving for blood. How is that normal?" Remus's eyes blazed, something that should have been a warning._

_"So, everything that has a craving for blood is a monster? Vampires, werewolves and lions are monsters?" Kit hissed back at him._

_"Yes. This is a disease, Kit. It can't be cured. A disease is eating away at my humanity,"_

In hindsight, Kit completely understood it now. Or at least, she understood it a bit differently. She hated to think that her time with the Dark Lord had been a disease, but it certainly had eaten away at her humanity. She frowned into her mug as she thought about Remus. She hadn't seen him in a while and she missed him. And she had a question on a Potions assignment that she couldn't figure out. She rose and went to the fireplace. She stuck her head in and called for Remus. He appeared a moment later, choking on some ash in his haste.

"Long time no see, huh?" she asked him cheerily.

"Seriously,"

"Speaking of, have you seen him lately? I swear he's disappeared off the face of the earth." Kit laughed and shook her head. "Anyway, I'm really stuck on this Potions question and James is getting sick of me."

"Never going to happen!" James yelled from the kitchen, where he was eating bacon with his bare hands and attempting to not get grease on his Defense paper.

"He's just saying that," Kit muttered to Remus. "Wanna come over? Maybe play a little Exploding Snap?"

"In a bit. Mum wants some help clearing out the attic. Merlin, you should see some of the stuff she has up there. From the Dark Ages, I swear."

"I heard that!" Remus's mother chided and a moment later Remus was rubbing his head where a wooden spoon had smacked him.

"Sure, I'll see you then." Kit said goodbye and went to the kitchen. James smiled when she wrapped her arms around him and pressed a kiss against his cheek.

"I was thinking, we haven't seen Sirius and Rose for a while, and since Remus is coming over later anyways, we could all have dinner together. Thoughts?" Kit settled against him, reading the paper from over his shoulder.

"Uh, maybe we should just stick with Remus. You know how you react when Sirius is around Rose,"

"James, I'm fine with it now. They're dating, whatever." She shrugged and still felt a little worry in her chest at how faithful Sirius would be.

"If you're sure," he said making a face Kit couldn't see. Oblivious, Kit kissed him and skipped upstairs to get dressed. She threw on whatever she found first and was out the front door before James could react.

It was finally warm out now, almost May, and Kit waved her arms in the breeze as she walked to the end of the street that she and James lived on. Looking around and seeing no one, she took out her wand and hailed the Knight Bus. She didn't feel like flying and Floo would announce her too quickly. Besides, they were almost out of Floo powder. The large purple bus came to a screeching halt before her and she smiled up at the director.

"Grimmuauld Place, please. London." She handed over twelve sickles and took a seat near the back. She watched the muggle world go flying by and was nearly thrown into the person in front of her as they slammed to a halt. A man got on with two large packages tucked under his arm and sat down beside kit.

"Want to buy something, pretty lady?" He said, opening the side of the jacket just a bit.

"Um, not really." Kit was thankful when he stumbled into the aisle by a particularly sharp turn in the road and she jumped past him to get off in front of Sirius's old house. She looked up at the door, took a breath, then knocked.

She was surprised to see Regulus open the door.

"Hello," he said with a curt nod.

"Don't you have a house elf to do the dirty work?" She asked as she stepped inside. He looked at her strangely for a moment then closed the door behind her.

"Why are you here?"

"Come now, we were on friendly terms not so long ago." Kit pouted at him as she walked past him into the kitchen.

"As I remember, you were different than you are now." He crossed his arms and watched her look around. "What are you looking for?"

"Your older brother," she poked her head into the dining room and came back a moment later frowning.

"You do realize that he was kicked out?"

"You do realize that he came back here before. Actually," Kit stopped her searching and faced Regulus squarely. "The last time he was here, didn't he find my cousin locked up in one of these rooms?"

"You mean 'that cunt' my brother's in love with? Great show by the way, you really got into character." Regulus remarked and Kit pursed her lips at him. He'd inherited the Black wit, evidently.

"You know what I was thinking?" She asked as she looked around the house some more. He followed her up the stairs and watched as she looked in each room. The house was empty, of course, but instead of leaving Kit still stood before him.

"Entertain me,"

"I was thinking that you never really understood how much damage I could do."

"You're not still on about your 'true power' shit, are you? Because it's getting old."

"No, but I do think that you should know what happens to people when they mess with my family."

"I'm shaking in my boots," he rolled his eyes, but glared at her when he was pressed against the china cabinet. "You want to hurt me?"

"I want to rip you apart,"

"Why?"

"Why? Merlin knows what you did to Rose while she was here."

"I never touched her."

"You really expect me to believe that? Do you think I'm dim?"

"That's beside the point. But I didn't hurt her."

"Who did, then?"

"Cousins, friends, whoever was in the house at the time." Kit gave him another push and one of the glasses behind him shattered.

"You just stood by, that's just as bad."

"What was I supposed to do? 'Save' her then get killed that night?" His lips twisted into a wry smile. "You should know all about that. Being forced to do something. But wait, you really were that dark. It wasn't an act." He laughed at her, his head thrown back against the glass. "You don't even know who you are. It's pathetic."

"At least I'm not kissing someone's boots just to save my own hide."

"No, you've already done that, haven't you?" He pushed her back and brushed his shirt off. "He's looking for you and he's not going to wait for you to come knocking. He's sure as hell not going to believe whatever story you spin for him this time. When he finds you, that's it, you're done." Regulus walked up to her and reached over her to open to door.

"Get out of my house." He said coolly and watched as she spun on her heel and left. Evidently, whatever she'd been planning on doing hadn't gone according to plan. Kit slammed the door shut behind her and walked to the end of the street. She paused before drawing her wand as she remembered something. She was a legal witch now. She could Apparate. Too bad it'd been a few months since she'd done it. But Kit, being Kit, shrugged the worry off and popped out of sight.

James nearly spilt his tea when Kit appeared in the kitchen not ten minutes after she'd left. She saw a pile of boxes on the floor behind him. He tried to kick them out of sight but Kit had already seen them.

" 'Front Hall'? What's that about?" Kit asked and James muttered into his drink darkly.

"He'll kill me, he'll nail me to the wall and kill me." He took a breath and sat Kit down. "Rose and Sirius are moving in together. They've already got a place in London." He chewed on his lip and followed Kit into the foyer.

"I assume you know where they are," Kit motioned to the fireplace and James rolled his eyes.

"Let them settle down first,"

"James, come on, I just want to see the place."

"Liar, you want to yell at Rose for not telling you. Can you blame them, Kit? You've never been approving of their relationship."

"Can you blame me?"

"Okay, so Sirius doesn't have the best track record..."

"Understatement,"

"But he's been nothing but kind to her since she got here a year ago. Come on, Kit. Give them a chance."

Kit put a hand on James' chest and ran a teasing hand down his torso. "James," she pleaded, a sinister look in her eye. James growled and wrapped his arms around her.

"Not fair, you tease." He grumbled as he pulled her into the fireplace.

"Rose, where is this supposed to go?" Sirius asked, a large picture frame in his hand. The people in the picture were protesting at being held at such an awkward angle, clinging to things as he shook it around.

"If I know Rose, probably on the mantle." Kit said as she brushed the ash off of her pants. Rose came in a moment later and looked somewhere between scared and livid.

"You told her?" Sirius managed, glaring at James.

"I tried," he held his hands up in surrender.

"When were you planning on telling me? House warming?"

"We were going to tell you, it just slipped our minds." Rose said earnestly. Kit pursed her lips at her cousin and looked around.

"Besides, when were you going to tell us you were moving in with James?" Sirius said as he placed the picture on the mantle.

"What?" Kit asked at the same moment James said, "I said I was thinking about it!" His cheeks turned ruddy and Sirius looked embarrassed.

"You want to move in together?" Kit asked.

"Well, yeah. It seemed like the next step. Now that your parents have moved and mine are heading out, we could have my place." He rubbed the back of his neck and looked everywhere but Kit's eyes.

"Seriously?" Kit asked.

"Seriously," Sirius said with a wink, giving James a nudge. He'd known about Prongs' plan for a while now.

"Well, there was one condition." James shared a quick look with Sirius as Kit looked askance of Rose.

"What?" She asked warily.

"First off, this isn't exactly going as planned, keep that in mind, and I didn't have time to grab it before you pulled me here, but...uh..."

"James?" Kit asked nervously, seeing his flounder. She took a step to him and brushed the hair off of his forehead. "What is it?"

"Will you marry me?" He blurted. In the shocked silence that followed, James blabbered on. "I was planning on having the ring with me, you know? Well, I hadn't planned on doing it in front of these two, but since this one can't keep his mouth shut," he gave Sirius a look. "But I mean, I love you, and...and it seems right, right? And I was hoping you'd say yes but if you didn't I'd be fine. I understand and everyth-" Kit's lips stopped him mid-sentence as she kissed him. James picked her up and gave her a spin as they kissed, pulling back long enough to let out a whoop of joy. When he finally set her down, he refused to let go of her. Rose was tearing up and smiling at the two of them, but her eyes widened suddenly and she grabbed Kit.

"We have so much to plan! The dress, the venue, who is going to be there..." She bit her lip and her brow furrowed. "Where would we hold it?"

"Rose, Rose, no dress, no planning. Can't it just be small?" Kit turned to look at James and was surprised to see him shake his head.

"We haven't got anything to hide. Besides, there are people who should be there. This summer, we could have it at Hogwarts when we graduate." He smiled so brightly that Kit couldn't help but agree. She grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the fireplace.

"You are leaving?" Rose asked.

"Hardly, besides a housewarming, we've got an engagement to celebrate. I'm getting the rest of the gang!" Kit nearly skipped to the fireplace and called for Remus and Peter. She just asked them to come over, wanting to tell them in person what had happened.

"I'll be right back. We should have something to show for the engagement," James joked and Apparated away a moment later and Kit was left with Rose and Sirius. Unable to help it, she jumped up and gathered Rose into a tight hug.

"Katherine, I am very happy for you." Rose began and Kit pulled back, knowing there was a but coming.

"Thank you...?" Kit said hesitantly and Rose told her that she should be put to work. Ah, there was the but. Rose tossed her a box labeled 'front hall' and Kit walked out to place everything. She crouched to open the box but she found herself sitting cross-legged instead, looking at each thing she took out. They were the pictures from her old house and ones of Sirius as well. A picture of her father and Rose's father rough-housing and laughing up at the camera looked up at her and Kit put it to one side. The next one was of the whole Ruskova family, Morozov's and all. She and Kit had been so young when the picture was taken. Maybe four? Kit set it aside and laughed out loud at the next picture. It was of Sirius, James, Peter, Remus and herself on Christmas of first year at the Potter's house. It must have been Sirius's. James and Sirius were joking and laughing at something and Kit was trying to push past Remus to hurt them. Poor Peter was being pulled at by both Kit and Sirius. Kit laughed and saw every Christmas picture until the previous year. They hadn't taken one last year. Frowning, Kit summoned one of Rose's cameras and set it beside her, intent on getting a group picture before the day was out. With a smile, Kit saw every picture Rose had taken when they'd exchanged presents the past year in the common room. They were all laughing, and Rose had caught a moment between Kit and James that had been so astounding in the previous months. Now, it seemed like a regular occurrence.

Kit stood and spread the pictures out on the floor. Picking up the one of their family back in Russia, she put it right at the entrance and traced their whole lives down the hall. She watched as her friends grew up before her eyes, how James lost that silly boyishness and Remus filled out. Kit frowned as she saw that after third year, she really hadn't gotten any taller. It was rather sad. She stood looking at one picture when James wrapped his arms around her.

"Did you know Sirius kept all of these?" she asked him.

"Eh, he's a sap but he won't admit it." Kit felt him shrug and spun in his arms. "I supposed I should do this properly." He held out a ring and slid it onto her finger. It was a thin band with three small gems set into the band. Kit stared at it, girlishly enjoying the way it sparkled. She jumped into his arms and kissed him fiercely.

"I love you," she whispered to him as they walked back into the living room. Before he could reply, someone had snatched Kit from his arms and was holding tight against him. Remus squeezed her and smiled into her hair.

" 'Bout time," he joked when he finally let her go.

"That's what I've been saying," Sirius said from the couch. Peter was patting James on the back and went about getting drinks from the kitchen.

"Rose!" Kit shouted when she heard the front door open. "Look!" she rushed to meet her cousin and thrust her left hand out. Rose smiled, but it was dimmed. Kit instantly sobered and held her shoulders.

"What's wrong?" she asked, evidently not as quietly as she had hoped since everyone stopped what they were doing to poke their heads into the hall. Rose avoided all of their eyes as she dropped her keys onto the table and her eyes flickered to Sirius. He was at her side a moment later and took her arm.

"What did they say?" he asked.

"What did who say?"

"She went to St. Mungo's today. She hasn't been feeling well." Sirius said as he led her to the couch. She seemed almost frustrated and Kit rolled her eyes at Sirius.

"Are you sick?" Kit asked as she sat beside her.

"No,"

"Are you hurt?"

"No," Rose said again as she played with her hair nervously. She looked at Sirius for a long moment and Kit's eyes widened. She began shaking her head as Rose spoke.

"I am...pregnant." She barely whispered the last word and she kept her eyes trained on her lap. Kit got up at began pacing.

"No, no, no," she muttered and James caught her as she was about to turn and held her.

"What's wrong with Rose being pregnant?"

"Because...well now I have to accept the fact that they've...you know...slept together."

"Mature," Remus remarked.

"No, because now I picturing it and...oh god!" Kit froze and looked at Rose. "How far along are you?"

"A month and half,"

Kit did the math in her head and tried not to show how she felt. That was when Rose had been found. So, while Kit was somewhere being tortured and still lost to the world, Sirius had decided it was a great time to get a leg over. How nice. The betrayal she felt was irrational, completely so, but it still hurt. She smiled at Rose, her grin a tad too bright.

"That's great, really. You'll be a great mother." Kit gave Rose's shoulder a squeeze before walking into the kitchen.

"Kit..." James said as he followed her. "Kit, this is a big moment for Rose, why are you ruining it?"

"Ruining it?" Kit hissed at him, trying to keep her voice down.

"Yes, this means a lot to Sirius too, don't wreck it."

"I'm not trying to."

"You don't have to try, it seems to come naturally to you."

"What are you saying?"

"You're immature when it comes to Sirius and Rose. They're adults, Kit, they don't need your approval anymore."

"Immature? James, I was being held by the Dark Lord, Rose was probably beaten within an inch of her life, and Sirius thinks that's a good time to finally shag her? What about me, huh? Or was he just too horny to care!"

"Katherine, stop it! You're being immature. Please, this isn't about you or what you were going through. Sirius was torn apart by Rose being gone, he didn't do anything! He couldn't. So, of course he wanted to be with Rose when she was finally found."

"That's not the point-"

"Kit, the world doesn't revolve around you! Merlin, I don't know what's happened to you. Ever since you came back you've acted like everyone should focus on your needs, on what you want."

"That's not true."

"Maybe you had some standing with the Dark Lord, maybe you were the centre of that world, but you aren't here, alright? You are just one of us. If you want that attention so much, maybe you should just go back!" His last words rang through the house and Kit stared at him in stunned silence for a moment. They were both fuming, glaring at each other over the counter. She pushed herself away from it and said, "Fine," before Disapparating. She popped into a little park not far from The King's Cross Station and sat on one of the benches. It wasn't fair. She was trying to get back to normal, but it wasn't easy, it wasn't like she could just snap her fingers and be fine. She glared at a patch of grass at her feet when someone stood in front of her.

"Rose was happy, you know. Before you ruined it." Sirius muttered.

"Exactly, Rose was happy. Are you? Why am I the only one thinking about what this means. You're having a child, Sirius. This isn't some Herbology project that you just have to look after for a week then hand it back."

"I know that and I don't care. Rose is happy. She wants to keep it, Kit. I'm supporting her which is more than you've done in months!"

"I can't help it! I can't just change!"

"Liar! You can, but you won't! You like the attention too much! You think you're so complex and different than everyone else, like your opinion means more. I don't give a damn what you think about this kid. I won't give up on Rose just because you're too selfish to look past your own needs!"

"I'm trying! I was tortured-"

"For a month! I put up with that shit for my whole life, Kit! It's been a month since then, move on! But you don't want to! It's pointless trying to deny it, we all know you too well. You're always the loudest because you want all the attention, you need it and if this is how you're going to try and get it, count me out. Count us all out because we are sick and tired of being the ones on the receiving end of your stupid angst!" Sirius threw his hands up and ran them painfully through his hair. "We were all there for you, Kit. Every day since we met you. Every day we've stood by your side. We all sat around your hospital bed when you were knocked out during the first game, we all were there when your grandmother passed, hell, we tried to be there when Eric cheated on you. But you never give us credit, you just assume we'll be there."

"I was there for Remus when the rest of you couldn't be! I was there for Peter when you picked on him, I beat Gregory up when he hexed you in the hall. Don't you dare say that I wasn't there for any of you!"

"What have you done recently? You split your time between moping around the house and lashing out when people tried to help you. And today you just took all the attention from Rose."

"It was supposed to be my day!" Kit screamed at him, throwing the ring at him. "I was supposed to get engaged!"

"There it is!" He pointed savagely at her, his hand shaking. "You just wanted everyone to fawn over you! You've wanted that for your whole life!" On some childless impulse he pushed her, unable to think of anything else to do. Kit stumbled back and caught herself on the bench.

"Is that it? All of you have just been putting up with my shit for years? You've been saying all this behind my back? You're fed up with it? If you're all so goddamned fed up why did you even bother in the first place!" Kit screamed, pulling back and landing a bruising punch at his nose. The cartilage cracked beneath her knuckles and she stood back panting. Sirius grabbed her shoulders and shoved her down onto the bench.

"I don't know! I don't have a fucking clue why any of us even wasted the time! Maybe someone else can put up with it, but I'm done. Go find someone else to be your fucking groupie." Sirius disappeared and left Kit shaking and alone in the park. She glared at the people who had stopped to watch their exchange until they left. When she was finally alone, she drew her legs up to her chest and stared at the ground until the sunset.

They weren't right. Sirius had been overreacting, that was all. She didn't treat them like that, she was a good friend. She was trying to get back to normal, to stop the impulses to curse, to scream. She fought against the desire to just punish anyone who bothered her, who crossed her path. It would have been easier if she could have done that to him, just make him hurt so she didn't have to acknowledge the pain in her own chest at his words. It hurt too much to think that she really was all the things he'd said. It scared her truthfully. Made her reconsider all the insecurities she'd had before. What if this was who she was? What if she'd always been like this, hurting the people she loved, turning to violence because it was the easiest answer. She stood suddenly and ducked to pick up her ring before popping away from the park, not caring who saw.

James was sitting on the couch, his head in his hands. Kit placed the ring on the coffee table in front of him and watched his head slowly rise.

"Are you fed up?" she asked quietly. He stared at her, his hazel eyes clouded with some emotion she didn't recognize. "Are you upset?" she asked again. "Because Sirius made it quite obvious that you all were fed up with me."

"He doesn't think straight when he's upset,"

"Are you fed up?" Anger finally laced into her words, hurt lurking in them as well.

"You've been acting differently..."

"And when was anyone going to say something?"

"What, and get killed for mentioning it? Kit, you haven't been able to so much as hear a criticism without freaking out. You think any of us were going to try and pull you out of this rut?"

"Rut? That's what you think this is?"

"Well, what the hell is it?"

"I don't know. It's not a disease, it's not a rut, it's just who I am!"

"And we're back to this argument! You're like a broken record. The same thing every day."

"If you're so fed up with it all, why even bother getting married? Why did any of you bother wasting the time being friends if I was so annoying?"

"Because we love you, but you're so aggravating! For the past two months we haven't been able to do anything right. We can't keep up with your mood swings! "

"Then don't bother trying!" Kit picked up the ring and tossed it across the room. She slammed the door shut and ran down the street to her now empty house.

"So that's it then? You're not even going to let me say anything?" James yelled at her from his front door.

"I think you've said more than enough!" Kit ran into her house, throwing the door open and slamming it shut again. She grabbed the first thing she could find and when the door opened like she knew it would, she hurled the glass vase right at his head. He ducked and before Kit could think about grabbing something else he grabbed her arms and hurled her to the wall. His hands held her arms with bruising force as he gave her a shake.

"You are going to stay there and listen to me, woman! I have been by your side for nine years and now you decided that I've never done enough! I get it, it was rough being with the Dark Lord and I've been trying to keep up with you but I can't. You never listen when I say that I'm here, instead you just push everyone away! Then you complain about being alone! For Merlin's sake, we're trying. So don't you _dare_ tell me that none of us want you around. I would do anything to keep you by my side."

Kit screamed and tried to wretch her shoulders out of his grasp but he pushed her back. "And you think telling me I'm a pain in the ass will keep me by your side!"

"You need to know that we aren't the ones at fault here! If you would just open your eyes-"

"They are open and all I see is my friends leaving me when I need them the most!"

"I will never leave you," he hissed and gave her another shake. Her head knocked against the wall and James caught it easily, his hand cradling the back of her head. Gasping for breath, chest heaving, James pulled her lips to his. They crashed together, ripping at their clothes, too furious to say anything. Kit grabbed a fistful of his shirt and pushed him away. He stumbled back, his knees caught on the couch. He pulled her to him and spun her, pinned her against the back of the couch painfully. Her back bent over the top of it, her neck straining to meet his eye. Growling, James pulled her shirt over her head and tossed it aside. He grabbed her just below her hips and pulled her clear off of the couch. Kit latched onto him instinctively but pounded her fists against his back as he carried her up the stairs. Halfway to her room he muttered, "screw it," and pushed her up against the wall. Her jeans slid off easily under his hands and her panties went with them. Holding her in place with one hand, he unbuttoned his pants. His head bent to kiss her, his tongue pushing and probing. His chest alone nearly covered her entire body and as he tilted her head further back she realized he was trying to dominate her, force her to bend to his will. She twisted in his arms, pushed against his chest. She caught his lip and bit down. James grabbed her hips and pinned her in place with his. Her feet scrambled against his legs, trying to kick him, to get away. She kept fighting as he slid home, screaming and scratching him as he moved. He pulled her leg higher up and her screaming increased. James put his hand against the small of her back, fingers sliding on the damp skin as he led her. Kit buried her hands in his hair, pulling at it until his throat was exposed. She kissed his pale skin and her assaults on his back died down. Instead she clutched at him, whispering things to him, urging him on. James ground deeper against her until he could barely stand and they both sagged against the wall. Kit was pinned between his chest and the wall, her arms and legs wrapped limply around him. James' legs felt watery and weak as he gathered her and put her on her bed. Lying down behind her, he drew her bare body against his and wrapped his arms around her.

* * *

**It's been a while, but I'm back posting! I've got some things planned and I'm really excited to finally get them up here. If you're still reading this after such a long break, thank you. Every view, every hit and review makes my day **

**Thanks for reading,**

**Dahlia**


	28. Chapter 28

Kit woke up the next morning alone and was all kinds of sore. She grabbed a robe and stumbled down to the kitchen, wincing every step of the way. Her arms were bracleted with bruises and that was to say nothing of the inside of her thighs. James was sitting at the table, a cup of coffee in one hand, the Daily Prophet in the other. He stood when she entered and kissed her gently when she stood beside him.

"Feeling better?" he asked.

"I suppose. It was just..." Kit searched for the right word as she grabbed a mug from the cupboard. "Everything. We're all so young and Rose is having a kid and apparently I'm horrible to be around and none of you are-"

"Stop," James took the mug from her hand and kissed her palm. "Let's not fight again."

"I dunno," Kit jumped up onto the counter and hooked her legs around James. She pulled him so he stood snugly between her legs and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Last night was certainly enjoyable."

James raised her brows at her and ran a hand along her arm. "Really? You're black and blue," he frowned and brushed aside the edge of her robe. "Merlin," he breathed.

"Like I'm the only one with bruises," Kit stroked his shoulder where she'd held on too tightly and found an indent where she'd bitten him. With a quirk of her brows, Kit moved with cat-like agility and kissed the spot. James chuckled and wrapped his arms around her. He kissed the top of her head, twirling a long stand of hair around his finger. Beneath him, Kit settled against him and rubbed her cheek against his shoulder.

"You're warm," she muttered, her eyes sliding shut. James smiled into her hair and ran his hands along her spine. She shivered against him, making him grin. There was a whoosh of wind then someone cleared their throat.

"I do hope I'm not interrupting."

Kit and James jumped back, Kit knocking her head against the cupboard as they stared at their headmaster. James coughed and flash Kit a quick grin, cheeky almost.

"What can we do for you, sir?" Kit asked, tugging her robe into place and hopping down. "Tea?"

"I'm afraid this isn't a social visit. I must speak with your, ah, fiance. My congratulations." He bowed his head to Kit before taking James aside. Kit sat and waited for them to leave the room. It was hardly fair that she shouldn't be included. James' wand was on the table, calling to her. Her hand whipped out to grab it and she leaned back to a dangerous angle in her chair. Improvising, she drew a line between her ear and the door with the wand, muttering under her breath until she could hear their conversation. It was like listening to a badly tuned radio, a sure sign that she needed more Charms practice.

"I've already spoke to Mister Black. I cannot stress how much we need you."

"What about Rose and Kit?"

"Mister Black made it quite obvious that he did not want Miss Morozov in harm's way. As for Miss Ruskova, I would advise against her attendance, if only to protect herself. We would not want a relapse of last Christmas."

"Of course."

"Will you be there with Mister Black tomorrow?"

"Of course, with Remus and Peter as well."

"Good, until tomorrow then." Kit hastened to act normal as the door opened. Her chair banged against the floor and she jumped up to the kettle.

"Are you sure I can't interest you in a cup of tea, sir?" Kit asked, the perfect picture of composure. Well, she would have been if not for James' curious look. It wasn't until she looked down and saw that she was about to pour water over her toast that she understood his look.

"I'm afraid I must be off. Good day," Dumbledore bowed his head and vanished. The kettle clattered down to the counter.

"So, where are you going tomorrow?"

"Eavesdropping?"

"You bet," Kit took a bite out of her toast and fixed him with a hard look. She could go at this all day.

"Kit, please, you have to understand-"

"Prongs!" Sirius called from the fireplace. James told Kit to stay there and ran to his best friend.

"Hey, Pads!" Kit said. James spun.

"Merlin, woman! Can't you do one thing I say?" James asked desperately. Kit smiled.

"Not really." She shrugged. "So, you going with James to this thing?"

"The Order meeting?" Sirius asked. James socked him in the shoulder.

"She's not supposed to know, you dolt!"

"How was I supposed to know that?" Sirius said as he rubbed his arm. Kit settled against the wall and pursed her lips at James.

"Order?"

"Kit, I'm serious..."

"So am I."

James sighed and pushed Sirius to his fiancée. "You deal with her."

"The Order is a group of people banning together to fight against The Dark Lord. Dumbledore is the head of it. He wants us to be a part of it."

"I see. And I'm not allowed because..." of course, she'd heard them talking about why they didn't want her to go.

"Well..." Sirius said, searching the room for something to distract her. Kit put her hands on her hips.

"Remember that dismemberment Charms I've been threatening you with?" He nodded and Kit tapped her temple. "Still got it up here,"

"Alright! Will you just spend the day with Rose? Please, I'm begging you, I don't want her to go."

"Why?"

"Why, blimey! She pregnant, isn't that enough?"

"I'm not."

"I know you aren't, but she needs someone there. What if something happens while we're gone?"

"Sirius, she's maybe two months pregnant. Even I know nothing will happen."

"Just do it, please!"

"If I do," she saw his look of hope, "big if, what do I get in return?"

"I'll get you all the chocolate from Zonko's you want."

"Deal," Kit shook his head and laughed when a very confused James walked in.

"She agreed?"

"I know! Who knew!" Sirius laughed and pulled James away.

"Hey! The meeting isn't until tomorrow."

"Boy time," Sirius said, nearing the fireplace.

"No, he needs to help me get all this stuff over to his place before I sell this house."

"If you let me take him now and spend tomorrow with Rosie, I will do all the moving for you." Sirius pleaded.

"Works for me!" Kit gave a dazzling smile before kissing James goodbye and pushing him into the fireplace.

"If you're so eager to get rid of me..."

"It's not that, hon. I just hate packing."

* * *

Kit stared at the coffee swirling around in her mug and tried to pull some inspiration from the milky drink. She was sitting beside Rose and desperately trying to distract her cousin from the fact that Sirius and James were leaving in – Kit checked her watch – four minutes. Kit was easily as antsy as the boys, just eager to go with them. Of course, she had to stay behind and watch the pregnant one while the boys had all the fun. How in the hell was she supposed to keep Rose busy when she wanted to drop everything and go with James? She looked up at James pleadingly and was met with a shrug.

"Gee, thanks," she muttered and stuck her tongue out at him. He rolled his eyes at her, but gathered her up into his arms.

"We're heading out now. Behave." He gave her a stern look.

"What if I don't want to?" Kit smiled coyly.

"Then, we'll have to have a talk when I get back."

"Looking forward to it, love," Kit kissed him goodbye and gave his rear end a pat as he passed. Suddenly alone with Rose, Kit floundered for something to talk about. "So, Rosie. How's the house? Got everything in place?"

"Do not play dumb with me Katherine. I know you know."

Kit gave a nervous giggle and panicked. "Would you look at that, my cup's empty. How about yours? Need a refill?" She rushed to get Rose's cup and nearly tossed it into the sink.

"Katherine...what is going on?" Rose asked from the counter.

"Nothing. Nothing's going on."

"You never were a very good liar, you know."

Kit scoffed. "I'm a better liar than you are. I'm a terrific liar, in fact. I just...you know..." If she told Rose the truth without hesitating, Sirius would flay her since she didn't make an effort.

"Tell me,"

"No," Kit ran to the other side of the kitchen.

"Tell me,"

"Nothing to tell." Kit checked her watch and shrugged.

"Kit!"

"Have I stalled long enough to be convincing?" Kit asked, already taking Rose's hand.

"What?"

"Good enough," she pulled Rose outside and checked around before walking down the street.

"The Order of the Phoenix. It's a group of people Dumbledore is gathering to ban against the Dark Lord. He wants Remus and Peter and James and Sirius to be a part of it."

"Why not us?" Rose asked.

"The hell if I know why James wants to keep me away. Sirius doesn't want you there." Kit saw the spark in her cousin's eye. "Be reasonable, he's just worried about your...eh...condition."

"My condition? I am barely three months pregnant, nothing will happen! That intolerable man! I swear when he is getting back, there will be hell to pay! Merlin, I swear I will- I'll- oh!" Rose couldn't come up with a threat and instead huffed as Kit dragged her down the street. "Where on earth are we going?"

"Peter's late for everything." Kit checked her watch again. They had two minutes before the meeting started, which meant they had eighteen before Peter showed up. Through no fault of his own, Peter was always late. He had probably misplaced one of his shoes this time. Kit stopped in front of a small house, shabby-looking and worn out. She unlocked the door with the key Peter had given her years ago. With a grin, the lock clicked back and the door swung open. She saw light pool from a room on the right and pulled Rose in as quietly as possible. Telling her cousin to stand completely still, Kit crouched down and peeked into the room. Peter was pulling on his shoes, just as she had thought. She stood, grabbed Rosie's hand and counted to three.

The last thing Peter saw before Disaparating was Kit and Rose charging at him. Kit landed painfully on her knees, effectively dragging Rose down with her.

"What the—?" Peter rubbed his head before his watery blue eyes nearly popped out of his head. "They'll kill me! You can't be here!" But his protests fell on deaf ears. Kit was already past him and looking up at the building before her. In the middle of nowhere, it seemed. High grey walls covered in ivy, wrought-iron gates, and bright red roses blooming among the vines. Kit went to the gate and pushed it open.

"Who's house is this?"

"It's Dumbledore's."

"I thought he just lived at the school," Kit said, still in awe of the place.

"Of course he does not," Rose rolled her eyes at her cousin.

"The things I'd get up to if I had Hogwarts to myself..."

"Exactly why you never will," Rose pushed the gate open and walked through to the gravel path. The shrubbery had been carved into unicorns and centaurs that moved, whinnied and bowed as she passed. Kit ran past, heading for the door, but stopped four feet short.

"What are you waiting for?" Rose asked.

"I'm not," Kit frowned and put her hand up only to have it stop in mid-air. "Clever bugger," she muttered as Peter walked right past her.

"Is good magic."

"It's amazing magic. But the question is, how to _we_ get past it?"

"Kit," Rose turned to her cousin and Kit knew the look in her eye.

"No, Rose we've come this far! You can't tell me you don't want to know what's going on in there."

"But we would be going against our Headmaster."

"_Old_ Headmaster. C'mon, Rose. Don't you want to get at Sirius?" Kit watched as Rose chewed on her lip and considered. She heard her cousin breathe in and smiled.

"Oh, alright," Rose drew her wand and pressed the tip against the barrier. "If Dumbledore did this, how are we supposed to get past it?"

"There's got to be a way. I'm sure of it... _Finite Incantatum_."

"You did not really expect that to work, did you?" Rose scoffed. Kit stuck her tongue out.

"At least I'm trying."

Twenty minutes later and they were no closer to finding out what was going on inside than before. Kit was leaning against the barrier, appearing to be leaning on thin air, when the front door opened. Kit, too tired to noticed, didn't open her eyes until they spoke.

"He figured you'd be here. Come on," Snape spun and walked away, not even turning when Kit fell backwards as the wall dissolved. Gravel few up and scraped along her hands as she caught herself.

"Tosser," she muttered and stood. "Why are you even here? Shouldn't you been getting initiated as a Death Eater, or whatever it is you freaks do?"

"Katherine!" Rose hissed.

"Tell me, did you know about the attacks? That we were being targeted?"

"Of course I knew, we all knew." Snape said as he led them through a cavernous foyer.

"You were there when he kidnapped us."

"I'd never heard you cry before, Katherine. Or scream nearly as much as you did." He said coolly. Kit grabbed his shoulder and pushed him against the wall.

"I don't who the hell you think you are but whatever game you're playing, it ends now."

"Game?"

"Don't pretend to be a friend, an ally then run off to your Master. What lie did you have to spin to get Dumbledore to believe you?"

"I didn't lie to him." Snape grabbed Kit's forearm and pushed her away with more force than she'd expected from the pale, skinny boy. "Here," He opened a door than led to a basement and walked down first. Kit had never been so tempted to push him down the steep, stone stairs. Once she even reached out to do it, but Rose caught her hand.

"Kit," Rose shook her head at her cousin.

"He's such a prat," Kit said, not bothering to keep her voice down. When the stairs finally came to an end, they turned into a large room, easily thirty people sat around it, Dumbledore at one end, a man who looked much like him sat to his right. Kit recognized some of them as past students. There was no mistaking the flaming hair of the Weasleys. There was Professor McGonagall, Hagrid, Sturgis Podmore, a previous Hogwarts student who graduated two years before herself. She saw the Longbottoms, the Prewetts and Marlene McKinnon. Dumbledore had certainly recruited the right people; these were some of the brightest and talented witches and wizards of her time. They were all laughing and smiling, apparently not yet into the serious stuff. There were exactly three people not laughing. Four, if Kit counted Snape, which she didn't because he never laughed. One was James, who was caught somewhere between outrage and amusement; one was Sirius, who looked like he was about to have a litter of kittens. The last was Dumbledore, who just sat smiling at the cousins. Kit smiled back when he winked at her. She looked at Sirius and gave him a little shrug.

"I tried." Sirius looked apoplectic as she sat on James' lap. James wrapped his arms around her and kissed her neck.

"You're a pain in the ass, you know that right?" he muttered into her skin.

"Uh-huh," Kit kissed him on the cheek. Sirius face caught her eye, turning an alarming shade of red. She stood and conjured two chairs beside her.

"Rosie, sit with me," Kit patted the chair and made a note to avoid Sirius at all costs. Rose slid over, her face white. Kit glared back at Sirius for a moment before putting an arm around Rose.

"No worries, love. He'll get that rod out of his backside soon enough. Just give it time." Rose gave a half-hearted chuckle.

"You're in a good mood," James noted quietly.

"Things are good,"

"Hello, Miss Ruskova and Miss Morozov. While I won't say I didn't expect you to come here, I'm glad you are so we can get started."

"You knew they were going to come?" Sirius asked, his face going from red to white with anger.

"You don't really think any measure could have kept these two away, did you?" He asked, looking at his old student from the tops of his glasses.

"I can think of one," he grunted with a pout.

Dumbledore chose to ignore him, eliciting a laugh from Kit. "You know why I've gathered you here. The Dark Lord, that is Lord Voldemort, is rising. He is preying on muggles and muggleborns. He believes in blood purity and wants to wipe out anyone who is not pureblood or doesn't not conform to his ideals. This means we are all at risk. Everyone at this table wants to stop this, wants to stand up and fight this blood cleansing. This is a dangerous job, it requires skill and weeks of work. It will require you to put your life on the line every day. If you have any doubt of your allegiance or you do not think you can risk your life, I ask you to leave now." Dumbledore waited patiently. Sirius gave Rose a meaningful look but Kit took her hand under the table and gave it a squeeze. They were all in this, no matter what.

"There is no turning back from this point. This is your choice, one you must keep. You will do everything in your power to protect those around you and fight the darkness that threatens our world." Everyone around the table nodded solemnly. Kit would risk her life if it meant destroying that man, that monster, who ruined her life.

"I need your promise, all of you, that you will never stop this fight against the darkness, that you will stand alongside the members of this Order of the Phoenix and protect each one like they were family." Again, he was met with nods, stone-faced and serious nods. Even James and Sirius had sobered. Dumbledore asked them to place one hand on the table. Kit placed her right and James placed his left on the table while holding her hand in his lap. Dumbledore pressed the tip of his wand to the table and each grain of wood lit up and glowed a brilliant gold. The colour seeped through the wood until every curving grain was lit. Beneath their hands, the table grew hot, scalding as the colour intensified. Dumbledore asked them to keep their hands were they were until the table had completely cooled. Kit squeezed James' hand as the pain grew close to unbearable. Without moving his hand, he leant over and kissed her temple. The glowing died down and finally the table went cold. Slowly, in awe, Kit raised her hand to her eye and saw on the fourth finger of her right hand her fingerprint had changed. What had once been a swirl of ridges and loops was now in the shape of a feather. Curious, she pulled out a scrap of parchment and summoned an ink well. Sure enough, after covering her finger in ink and pressing it into the paper, a feather looked up at her. James pressed his ink-stained finger onto the page and another feather floated beside hers. His was different, larger, made of different swirls. They still were unique to the individual, like fingerprints, but now they were all connected. James smiled at her warmly and held her cheek, effectively smudging ink on the side of her nose. Kit's mouth dropped open and she dipped a finger in the ink well and drew a line along his cheekbone.

"Katherine, James, while I appreciate the need for comic relief, we must begin." Dumbledore said and with that, the real meeting began. Kit had never known there was so much going on. Albus must have been planning for ages. There was a strange energy to the meeting, one that Kit found distracting. Like a constant itch, she could tell something was off. She looked across the table to Snape and knew it was coming from him. He shouldn't be there, he wasn't on their side. They spoke of plans, of the Ministry, all things that Severus would no doubt tall the Dark Lord. Did Dumbledore not see it?

"Miss Ruskova, what do you think?" Kit looked up to see McGonagall looking intently at her.

"Pardon?"

"Do you ever pay attention?"

Before Kit could answer, Rose was already speaking, putting a hand on her back. "When have you ever known her to pay attention Professor?" It was met with laughter, and Kit saw Snape smirk at her, like he knew she was onto him and no one would believe her. Merlin, he drove her up the wall! When Dumbledore finally called the meeting to an end, Kit tried to talk to him, but she was swarmed by people.

"You and James got engaged! I always knew you two would get together." Molly Weasley gave her a hug.

"Come here, yeh two!" Hagrid clapped James on the back, nearly sending him flying and gave Kit a hug so tight she thought one of her ribs cracked.

"Thanks, thanks," Kit said distractedly, looking around for the familiar slimy mop of hair.

"Hon, what's wrong?" James whispered to her.

"I'll see you at home," Kit gave him a quick peck goodbye before following Snape out of the room.

"What do you expect me to do, Katherine? Admit to you that I'm working for the Dark Lord?"

"It would be a start," Kit said, rounding on him in one of the many hallways. She had no idea where in Albus' house she was, but she needed to talk to him.

"Why don't you trust me?"

"Why should I trust you? One minute to say that you'll always be there for me and the next you tell me that you were there when I was kidnapped and did nothing. I thought we hated each other."

"We do,"

"Then why are you helping us?"

"Katherine, just because I don't like you doesn't mean I'm not going to help. I'm not that petty." His tone was cool but the implication was clear.

"I'm not being petty, I'm trying to protect the people you say you care about. I don't know why Dumbledore even wastes time on you. It's so obvious you're on His side."

"Dumbledore trusts me. More than he trusts you."

"That's ridiculous! You don't care about a single person in that room."

"Not true." Snape stepped around her with a sneer.

"Unrequited love for James, is it?"

He stopped dead not two steps from her. "No."

"Sirius?"

His cold stare was answer enough.

Kit stopped to consider and looked back at the room. "It's Evans, isn't it?"

"Lily is a perfectly nice girl."

"So it _is_ Evans! Just get married. She'll settle for you and you won't get anyone else."

"Sometimes I wonder why anyone puts up with you." He watched her hands clench. His lips twitched. "Hit a nerve, did I?"

Kit pulled back, ready to strike, but Snape drew his wand and kept her body still. "If I find out you've betrayed a single person in that room, I will murder you personally."

"Why do you think I would betray anyone here?"

"Because you're a Slytherin, you are a slime ball and you admitted you knew about us being kidnapped. Why should I even consider the fact that you might want to help Albus?"

"Your ignorance astounds me,"

"Ignorance! You are kidding, right? I have every reason to doubt your loyalty but you haven't given me a single reason to trust you."

"You asked if I cared about a single person in there. I respect the teachers and my old Headmaster, but there is one person in that room that I would give my life for. One person I would do anything to save. And that one person is the only reason I'm here, protecting a mess of people who did nothing short of torturing me in my childhood. If you want to doubt my loyalty to the group, fine. But I am devoted to that person." Kit had never heard Snape say so much outside of class, let alone show any kind of feeling. That alone made her consider, for half a second, that he might be telling the truth. It made her hesitate. But just as she went to ask who that one person was, Snape had lifted the charm and James was calling her name. Kit watched Snape go, his black robes swinging around a corner and out of site as James found her.

"What are you doing?" he asked, putting an arm around her shoulders. Kit shook her head and waved his question off.

"I think the better question is what are you doing? Don't you have an ambush to plan or something?"

"Kit, you really are daft sometimes, you know that?"

"Of course I know that. You would have never chosen me if I wasn't."

"Quite true," Kissing her cheek, he led her out of the house. "That reminds me. We're just a few weeks away from graduating." They had all fallen behind and had to graduate in August instead of June with the rest of the school.

"Finally," Kit muttered, thinking of the Potions assignments she'd being putting off for months.

"I thought that was when we were going to get married."

Kit tripped on the gravel, surprised at James. "Uh, yeah. I know."

"You aren't happy?" He asked, brows furrowing over his bright hazel eyes.

"No, I'm ecstatic. I just thought you'd want to keep it off for a bit longer."

"Kit, we're at the beginning of a war. There's a chance that in a few months, I might never see you again."

Kit felt as if she'd been punched in the stomach. Dumbledore talking about it was fine, but when James Harold Potter started talking about it, about the possibility of any of them dying, it felt too real. She took a tighter hold on James and shook her head.

"Right. Let's not talk about that, hon."

"Hey, hey," James pulled her to a stop and held her face. "It's scary, I know. I don't...I can't even think about this war. It's too dangerous for any of us, too ambitious. I don't know how we're going to win, how we're going to fight and protect everyone. But do you know what I do know? That you never back down, you never give up. You meet every challenge head on and you know what? That makes me think we have a fighting chance." He rubbed his thumb along her cheek, watching the way her eyes flickered between each of his.

"You think so?" she asked, a true worry shining through.

"I do." James kissed her softly, chasing any worries from her mind for the moment. "Do you want to go home?"

"If you're so keen on having this wedding so soon, I think I need to get shopping." Kit smiled at him and popped out of sight a moment later. Laughing, James Apparated after her.

Kit landed in front of Sirius's new flat and pushed open the door. She really needed to get a proper key, using a charm made her feel a bit guilty.

"I know you're in here, Black!" Kit yelled from the hall. She crept through the house, sneaking around corners like a fool.

"What are you doing?" Sirius asked. Kit straightened herself, noting the way his hair was standing on end and the furious look in his eye.

"Did you guys fight?" Kit asked, taking a cautious step into his room.

"I don't want to talk about it."

"I'll take that as a yes," she tiptoed over and sat down beside him on the bed. "Did you leave your socks out again? Dirty underwear? Oh, no, don't tell me you left the lid up." While he didn't exactly smile, Sirius shook his head and the corner of his lip twitched. Kit gave him a small smile and put an arm around him.

"I don't want her risking her life. Especially with a kid on the way."

"Now you see, there are two problems with trying to keep Rose from the Order. One: she's part Ruskova, there's no turning us away once we have our sights on something. Two: she's pregnant. Doesn't that mean that her hormones change or something? So, a little fight turns into a whole ordeal now." Again, his lips twitched.

"Okay, maybe you and James need to talk about your disobedient partners later, but Rosie'll calm down. She just doesn't want people to get hurt if she can stop it."

"But what if she gets hurt?"

"Then we call my dad in and he fixes her up."

"What if it's more than that? What if she dies?" Kit felt that same breathless feeling swoop through her.

"We'll never let that happen. Ever." She stood and brushed her hands off on her legs. "Pads, remember to put the lid down next time." She bent over and kissed his cheek. She popped away and opened her eyes to face James and Rose.

"There you are." Kit took Rose, noting that she'd already put her things in the spare room and brewed a big pot of tea.

"I don't feel like talking about fighting or the Order or anything like that, so," Kit sat Rose down and put her hands on the table. "We have planning to do."

"Planning for what?"

"Well, first I have a bunch of Potions assignments to get done, then, if there's time, we can start planning something else."

"What?" Rose asked, taking a cup and blowing across the top.

"It's a surprise."

"Katherine," Rose sighed, a perfect imitation of her mother. Kit just beamed at her cousin and pushed a stack of papers at her.

"Help, please."

* * *

**I'm trying to get all my chapters up to date, so a few might be uploaded tonight. I hope you enjoy!**

**Thanks for reading,**

**Dahlia**


	29. Chapter 29

Kit was staring at the pile of parchment on her table, eyes wide open and bloodshot. She'd stayed up the whole night finishing her homework. Rose had helped her with the Potions labs, but she was finally done. She would never have to open another textbook in her life. The idea almost made her cry with joy. She was finally done. She was free now. She was out of school. She was relived, of course, but a little worried. She had to do something with her life now. She wasn't a student anymore, she was expected to get a job, have kids, get married. Granted, she was halfway through the last one, but it was still a lot to think about. People had graduated from Hogwarts to become great Aurors, teachers, healers. They were some of the best in England, if not the world. And now she had to live up to that. She had to live up to what her parents expected of her.

Her parents.

Kit jumped up and grabbed a handful of Floo powder, feeling like a complete idiot. She dove for the fireplace without shouting goodbye to James and just hoped she'd remembered the address correctly.

"Mum?" she called, taking a cautious step out of the fireplace. Tori's head popped out from the kitchen, a smile spreading across her face.

"About time you came here. We have not heard from you since you come back from..." Tori trailed off, tears in her eyes as she gathered daughter in her arms. "We were so worried, Kit. Your father was... angry. I am just so glad you are safe. You and Rose are safe now." Kit hugged her mom back, enjoying the familiar feeling and smell of her. She felt at home again, relaxed.

"Tori?" Luka strode in and upon seeing his daughter put a hand over his mouth. "Katherine," he rushed over and scooped her up. Kit felt like a child again, able to just rely on her parents to hold her and make everything better. He led her to the couch and sat her down before facing her, his arms crossed.

"Child, don't you ever dare to do something so dangerous again, to scare us like that again."

"Dad, I'm sorry."

"You should be, I have never been so worried in my life. To see you at those meetings, to know what he'd made you do..."

"Dad, I'm sorry. I broke. I couldn't do it," Kit felt a familiar guilt wash through her and sting her eyes. She'd disappointed him and that hurt more than anything. "I let you down. I just couldn't do it."

Luka's anger dissipated and he sat beside his daughter, wiping the tears from her cheek. "Katherine, your uncle and I were much older than you were when we had to face him."

"You said you were seventeen,"

"That's when we could have left. Misha and I tried to leave, but it wasn't what he wanted. I gave in that week. And we would keep trying to leave. We would remember ourselves one night and vow to not go back. But we'd be dragged in the next day and I would give in by that night." Luka shook his head and ran his fingers through her hair. "Katherine, you could never disappoint me. You are so strong, you kept true until you didn't have a choice. I am worried for you, but proud. I've never been more proud of you."

"Why?" Kit asked.

"Because you found yourself again. He has a way of making you doubt everything you thought you knew about who you were. But you found yourself again, your friends wouldn't let you get away." Luka took her hand in both of his. "I should apologize to you. I am sorry, Kit. I never wanted you to be brought into this. I never wanted Rose or James or any of your friends to be brought into this mess. I am so sorry."

"Dad," Kit managed before holding him tightly.

"Katherine, what are you wearing?" Tori asked and grabbed her daughter's hand. She inspected the ring on her finger and gasped.

"James proposed." Kit couldn't help but smile. It was a watery smile, tears still damp on her lashes, but she was smiling. Tori squealed and started babbling in Russian that Kit couldn't understand. Luka just stared past her, eyes wide with disbelief.

"Dad?"

"Oh, you're grown up now, aren't you?" he smiled sadly as he hugged her again. It was hard to see his little girl growing up too quickly.

Kit smiled at her parents and spent the rest of the day with them, telling them everything that had happened. She'd cried more than she would ever admit, but her parents were there to comfort her every step of the way. She told them that Rose was pregnant and that it was due in February of the following year. And they smiled and wished her the best. They promised they would visit and see Rose through her pregnancy and pass the good news onto Rose's parents. They hadn't seen them for a few months but they knew how to reach them.

"There's one more thing." Kit said, hoping her parents would agree. "Dumbledore has gotten a group together, some of the best wizards and witches in the whole United Kingdom. It's a resistance again the Dark Lord called the Order of the Phoenix. James, Sirius, Peter, Remus, Rosie and I are all members. I would love it if you would come to a meeting. Even if you can't become members, I just want to to know that there are more people fighting against him than you might think."

"We would be honoured to come. If he needs any help, we are happy to assist. Get us before the next meeting."

"I will," Kit gave them a smile. The Order was going to be stronger with them.

* * *

Kit finally made it home, feeling content with the world. She'd seen her parents, talked to her family and everything seemed right. Until she walked out into her foyer and saw the sea of flowers spread across the hall.

"Rose, what the hell?" Kit picked one up and showed it to her cousin. "I'm not opposed to flowers, I just don't like the idea of living in a freakin' greenhouse." Her voice was met by an upturned nose and a little huff.

"Tell Sirius that flowers aren't going to make me come back." Rose didn't even look at Kit, instead sat flipping through her book. Kit stared at her in disbelief to no avail. Giving up, Kit threw her arms up and Apparated to Sirius's flat.

"You really thought roses were going to cut it?" Kit asked.

"Huh?"

"Intelligent," Kit muttered and tossed a bouquet at the Romeo. "And Rose says that flowers won't make her come back."

"I thought they were sweet," he frowned at the pretty arrangement in thought.

"It's a stupid gift. They die and it takes no thought of effort to get them."

"Well, tell Rosie that I thought about them for a long time and she'd better get back here if she knows what's good for her." Sirius gave a grave nod and went back to the radio. What was with people today? Kit thought to herself as she Apparated right back to her house.

"He says that he thought long and hard about them and that you should go back if you know what's good for you."

" 'Know what is good for me!' That little...oof!" Rose plopped back onto the couch and pouted. "Tell him he is a prick, as you say and that...I'll...I'll leave him!"

Kit shrugged and related the news to Sirius when she popped into his living room.

"Leave me! The hell she will! You tell her that I won't have any of it and that if she's not back by tonight I'll drag her back myself."

Kit didn't know why she was still playing the part of an owl for the two of them. It was interesting in a cruel way, hearing them up the stakes as they got angrier and angrier. However, the novelty of it wore off after an hour of popping between the two houses. Finally, after Sirius had suggested a rather creative way of murdering Rose, James caught her.

"What have you been doing all night? I haven't seen you since this morning."

"I went to my parents house. By the way, the say congratulations and about time about the engagement. And I've been playing owl for the lovebirds for the past hour." She growled an obscenity at the blonde sitting in her living room as James pulled her further away. "We don't fight that often, do we?"

James stopped dead and gave her a look. One brow pointed so far up that it disappeared into his fringe.

"What?"

James chuckled and walked away, shaking his head.

"What? We do not fight. We don't. James Potter, tell me we do not fight!" Kit crossed her arms at him from the end of the hall. James, smiling to himself, walked over, uncrossed her arms and wrapped them around his neck.

"We don't fight." He placed his hands on her back. "We have spirited debates, which, I would like to point out, often end in me getting hurt."

Kit, gasped at him in shock and smacked the back of his head.

"See, violence. Why I agreed to marry you is beyond me some days."

"Oh, bugger off, Casanova." Kit giggled. They walked down to the end of the hall and stopped in the study.

"This came for you today." James picked up an envelope and passed it to. She tore it open, using the letter opener he'd bought her. He watched warily as she once again examined the little knife.

"I still don't know if getting that for you was such a great idea." For added effect, Kit threw it at him. "Merlin!" James leapt away when it clattered onto the table beside his hand.

"Damn, I missed." Kit winked at him before turning back to the letter. She recognized the writing and smiled at the parchment. Dumbledore had heard that she'd finally finished her coursework and wanted to see it. He asked if they could meet at Hogwarts. She jumped up and stuck her head into the fireplace.

"Hello? Professor?" Kit asked, looking around his office from the fireplace. A moment later, his beard trailed across the floor and Kit was face to face with her old Headmaster.

"Katherine, what a pleasant surprise."

"Is now a good time? To talk?"

"Now would be just perfect. If you could bring your work." He nodded and stepped back. Kit walked into his room, a stack of papers under her arm.

"I must say, it is a relief to finally have all the work in." He gave her a quick look from over his glasses.

"They've all been waiting on me to finish up so they can graduate. Sorry."

"It's understandable that it's taken so long. I must say, I'm surprised that you all got the work done. Mr Black, especially."

"He's got Rose breathing down his neck now. I can't believe they, of all people, have a kid on the way." Kit shook her head and followed him down into the empty halls of the school.

"Give them both my congratulations, in that case. I hope that Miss Morozov doesn't overwork herself at the Order meetings."

"I'll keep her in line, sir." She smiled at him as they walked to the familiar door and Dumbledore knocked twice.

"Yes, Albus?" McGonagall answered the door and gave a little start when she saw Kit. "And Katherine. Come in," she held the door open and followed the two up to her desk. Signalled by a nod, Kit put her work on the table.

"I was hoping you could help me mark Miss Ruskova's work. As I understand, her friends are anxious to graduate."

"I should think so." Professor McGonagall said in her most prim voice. Kit gave a meek apology, shrinking back slightly. It didn't matter that she was graduated now, but the memory of drunkenly informing her head of house that the Gryffindor team had handed Hufflepuff their own ass never left her mind. She'd never gotten in trouble for it but she suspected that the woman never thought of her in the same way after that night. She was thankful when Albus said that he wished to speak with Katherine privately.

"As I'm sure you know, the Order is gaining power, but we need to start gathering more information. I already have a few people I can go to, but I wish to make one thing clear. Under no circumstances are you to ever attend a Death Eater meeting. All of your safety is at the forefront of my mind and I cannot see any way of keeping you safe if you agree to go undercover."

Kit couldn't help but smile at her old Headmaster. Despite seeming like he was so far removed from their lives, he knew them all so well. Kit wanted to go undercover with every fibre of her being. To be able to get at the people who'd just sat back while she'd been drawn in, all the people who'd ruined her life. But Albus knew her too well.

"There are things you can do. We need people to be protected, we need information from certain wizards, from the Ministry." He took a breath, almost dreading what he had to say next. "There will be battles to be fought, in which I'm certain Mister Black and Mister Potter will be quite overzealous. And I'm also certain there is no way to keep you away from those fights, however I must stress that while I told you that you would have to risk your life, I do not want to see you do it lightly. You and your family are destine for great things and I would hate to see that potential cut short."

Kit couldn't shake the feeling that he knew something she didn't know. Of course, he knew more than she knew, he was Albus Dumbledore and Kit realized that she would probably never know what he knew.

"Sir?"

"Yes?"

"Do you think we're going to win?" Kit stood and looked out onto the grounds she'd grown up on. She could see where she'd punched Regulus and broken his nose, she could just see the shimmer of the lake where she spent that one night almost freezing to death.

"I believe that light always conquers the dark. The fight might be long, and many may be lost, but I believe that we will."

"That's good." Was all Kit could think of to say. The thought of losing any of them was nearly unbearable but at least she could see that glimmer of hope at the end. She looked across at Albus. If she could put blind faith in him? To what end could lives to taken for "a good cause?"

Kit shook her head, unable to continue that thought. She trusted him with her life and she had to believe that he would do what was right.

* * *

When Kit got home, a stack of bridal magazines were spread across her table. "What in the..." Kit looked up to see Rose circling various dresses and ripping the pages out. "Rosie?"

"Kit! I was just thinking about wedding."

"I can see that. When are James and I getting married?"

"In the fall," she said, as if it was perfectly fine that she had planned the date of their wedding.

"I see. Hon, I really think you should fix things up with Sirius."

"We did. Now, what kind of dress do you want?"

"What? Oh, I, um... a long one?"

* * *

**There it is. Next chapter I will be up to date with what I've written. **

**Thanks for reading,**

**Dahlia**


	30. Chapter 30

This was it. Kit could hardly believe it. On the other side of her door was her father who would walk her down the aisle to meet her husband-to-be. Why were her hands shaking so much? For the hundredth time since she'd been seemingly locked in the large dressing room, she smoothed down the skirt of her dress. It was a long dress, strapless and simply beautiful. Rose told her that it had an organza slip over top of the silk dress, but to Kit it just looked like a sigh. It was so light, so airily thin, and Kit felt the same way. She was jittery, all nerves and nervousness. Maybe she was excited about it. She couldn't tell, truthfully. It was so much to think about. Rose had taken care of everything, absolutely everything. Music, food, decorating, invites, the venue, everything, which left Kit with nothing to do but get nervous about what was going to happen. She was getting married today. She was going to be bound to James Harold Potter for life. She was going to become Katherine Lynette Potter, for Merlin's sake!

Kit stood and paced, the silk and organza barely making a sound as her short legs made quick paces about the room. She and James were going to be married, but what if something happened to either of them? What if something happened and she died? It would leave James heartbroken. But if they didn't get married and she died, he could move on, right? Losing a wife is terrible, but simply losing someone you loved wasn't as bad, was it?

That made no sense, Kit thought savagely as she paced. Oh, Merlin, what was she going to do? She looked for a moment at the large window and considered leaving that moment. Call off the whole thing. She was too nervous, too young to be getting married. They could get married later. Or never and just stay in love. People fell out of love when they got married. This was a bad idea. Damn the dress and the music and the people, she wanted to leave. Kit grabbed a handful of the skirt and wretched open the door. Two long steps later, she was right up against none other than Sirius Black.

"The wedding is that way, Kit." He pointed behind her. When he ducked down and saw how distressed she was, he pulled her back into the dressing room and pulled her into a hug.

"Hey, what's wrong? I thought you loved James?"

"I do, but this...this hasn't got anything to do with love. Sirius, I can't. Not when out there, people are waiting to hurt all of us. Not when something might happen to you, to him, to any of us."

"This is what everyone needs right now, though. Something to take their minds off of what's going on out there."

"But what if something happens to me? He'll be devastated; I can't do that to him. And if we get married, he'll have to protect me. What if he gets killed saving me? I don't want to become his responsibility." Kit's chest bounced up and down with shallow, worried breaths, a steady flush spreading across her cheeks.

Sirius took her hand and sat her down, crouching in front of her. "Kit, he'd be devastated either way, and he would do anything to protect you, ring or not. But by going out there and saying in front of an audience that you love him and will be with him until death do you part, you'll make his dream come true. It sounds cheesy, I know. But he's wanted this for years. I know, I've stayed up with him while he blathered on about it." Sirius chuckled, smiling when it drew a teary grin from the nervous bride. "But this is what's supposed to happen. We've all known it for a while, you were just the last to figure it out." Again, he got a teary smile for his efforts. He stood and brushed off his pants before offering her a hand.

"Come on. Anymore of this commitment-phobe stuff and I'll start to think I'm rubbing off on you. Now," he wiped her cheeks clean and looked thoughtfully at her face. "I'm no good with this stuff, but..." he drew his wand and waved it across her face in an attempt to clear up the black smudges that had circled her eyes. Kit stepped back and looked at the mirror, gasping when she saw the bright blue eye shadow he'd managed to get on her face.

"Sirius! I look like my aunt Maude!"

"I told you, I'm rubbish with makeup." He shrugged at her, laughing when she spun around.

"This is just like the time you turned my hair orange in third year."

"At least I don't have to hold your hand down the aisle," Kit stuck her tongue out at him and ushered him out. Just before she shut to door on him, he pressed a kiss against her forehead.

"Git," she told him as he left. She rolled her eyes at the door, smiling all the while. She could still feel those butterflies bouncing against her stomach, but she could go through with this now. Kit chuckled at her friend's inability with make up before fixing it with a quick flick of her wand. Taking a steadying breath, she could hear the band strike up the starting note. She'd gone over this in the rehearsal, she knew what to do. Smoothing her dress one final time, she put her hand on the doorknob. With a steadying breath, she pushed it open and took her spot just outside of the ballroom. James walked first, then Sirius, Remus and Peter, then Rose would take her place. The music swelled and Kit counted to ten in her head. Or she tried, but the butterflies in her gut pushed her forward and she was nearly jogging up to the altar. Rose mouthed at her to slow down and Kit made an honest effort to take long, slow strides. Her parents sat in the front row and Kit stopped to give her father a kiss on the cheek before finally coming to stand in front of James. She handed her flowers back to Rose to hold and felt James take her shaking hand in his. Her eyes slowly lifted to look at her husband. Behind his glasses, his bright hazel eyes were shining. Feeling her hand shake, he gave it a squeeze as Dumbledore rose from his seat. He put his hands over their entwined pair and took a breath.

"Who hear gives this man?" he asked. James' parents came up, holding hands.

"We do." They said together, giving Kit and James encouraging smiles.

"Then join them together as you would yourselves." James' parents produced a length of gold rope, tying one end to James' wrist and the other to Kit's. The same was done for Kit's parents, who tied a length of red ribbon around their wrists. Dumbledore removed his hands and clasped them behind his back. "James Harold Potter, do you stand before those you love and pledge yourself to the protection and dedication to the woman before you?"

"I do." James said, his voice steady and sure. Kit stared up at him, her breath caught at how serious he was. He was dedicated to her, she could see it in his eyes, hear in his voice. Kit felt her mouth go dry and her throat tighten up. When Dumbledore asked her the same question, she didn't know if she could even speak. After a few failed tries, she finally managed to say those two words. She held his gaze the entire time, unable to look away from the earnest look in his eye.

"Now, present the other with a physical token of your commitment."

Kit turned and took the ring from Rose's waiting hand. She gave a watery chuckle when Sirius had to dig around his pockets for the ring James had given him.

"I, James Harold Potter, present this as a physical token of my love. May it forever remind you that you are in my thoughts and my heart." He spoke softly, putting the ring on her finger and kissing the band.

"I, Katherine Lynette Ruskova, present this as a physical token of my love. May it forever remind you that you are in my thoughts and my heart." Kit's hands shook as she lifted James' left hand and slid the ring onto his finger. She kissed the ring, smiling against his skin when she caught his eye.

"From this day on, you will both be connected under one name and one soul. When joined together in a union, each person takes on the other. May your love for each other shine on yourselves and those around. May it bring you hope, peace, trust and everlasting love. May it forever protect you from evil and provide everything you need. And I, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore determine that each person has come together on their own free will and join them." He stepped back and let Rose and Sirius take his place. They took the black cord that had been tied around Kit's bouquet and wrapped it around James' and Kit's hands. They shared a quick, fleeting smile before James pulled her close and kissed her. Kit lifted her free hand and held the back of his head, burying her fingers in his, for once, tidy hair. The crowd burst into applause and cheered when they finally separated. They stepped off of the step together, and when they did, the ribbons and cords that had been wrapped around their hands and wrists dissolved. They were replaced by three thin cord bracelets, one black, one red and one gold. Like the rings, they showed they she and James were united. Hands still entwined, they walked down the aisle and out of the room together. The guests stayed inside for a moment, allowing the new couple some time alone. James scooped her up, holding her against him. He put his forehead against hers.

"I love you, Mrs Potter." He said, brushing his lips against hers.

"I love you, Mr Potter." She took his hand and led him into the dining room. "Come on, I want to hear what Sirius's speech is." She walked with him into the dining room. The guests, already seated, clapped as the new couple made their way to the head table. People stopped them to congratulate them, only to stop when the food came out. Kit picked at the food on her table, her stomach still light and fluttering and too excited to eat. James held her hand the whole time, his thumb running along the smooth metal band around her fourth finger.

"You aren't eating?" James asked, concern clear across his face.

"I'm too excited."

"But you always ate before a Quidditch match,"

"I don't feel much like throwing up in this dress." James shrugged at her and kissed her cheek as another round of food appeared before them. Kit groaned, but the sound turned into a squeal of delight when she saw the fluffy cloud of chocolate mousse that awaited her.

Sirius stood up and called for silence. "I know you want to start eating, but put the brakes on for a moment. I have a speech." He said proudly. "James here is my best friend and it'll be hard to see him leave me for a girl, but the girl he's leaving me for it an amazing one. If any of you know us, we fight like cats and dogs, and she's a stubborn little cow, but I love her. And James does too. He has for a long time and to see him this happy is a nice change. But," he said seriously, "I feel like I should warn you. Kit snores, she eats like a pig, she's clingy, protective and at times, overbearing. She has horrible taste is music and is rubbish at cleaning, she drinks more tea than an average woman should and never, under any circumstances, let her near an open flame. She will set fire to the house and say it was an accident." He bent to get his glass, and held it to James in toast. "Good luck, you bugger. You'll need it."

* * *

Everyone had left, leaving the ball room a mess. Kit and Rose stood back to back in the centre of it, looking around.

"Kit, you should go home. It's your wedding night."

"I'm not leaving you here to clean this up. Especially with that one kicking away." Kit gave her cousin's stomach a pat before taking her wand out. "Come on, it'll only take a second." Standing back to back, the slowly turned until everything was righted, cleared away and put back. Right on cue, as the last plate was being stacked, the men walked in.

"Impeccable timing," Kit laughed as James scooped her up.

"I am taking you home."

"Why?"

"You've had far too much champagne," Kit made a minor protest beneath him, "and I want to spend as long as possible with the new Mrs Potter." He gave her a roguish grin, kissing a line from her jaw to the edge of her dress. "Besides," he whispered so the others wouldn't hear, "I've heard brides save some special thing for their wedding night."

"James!" Kit jumped down and smoothed her dress out.

"What?" He seemed honestly stunned and a little worried.

"I can't believe you would say something like that!" She stormed up to him and grabbed his tie to pull him down. "You almost ruined the surprise." She said coyly before pulling his lips to hers.

The couple was interrupted when Remus shook a camera at them. "Picture with the gang?" He asked, dragging them over. He set the camera on a table, atop of carefully stacked plates and glasses, then ran over to join the group. Kit, wrapped in James' arms knew that the picture was perfect. It was who they were, it was a single frame from a night that had been filled with perfection.

"Make sure I get a copy!" Kit called back to them as she and James left.

"Where are you going?"

"Home. It is out wedding night, after all." Kit winked at her cousin before Apparating away with her husband. They arrived on the front porch of his house and before Kit could ask why, he scooped her up and carried her bridal style through the door. She kicked her legs as he carried her up the stairs, making little squeals with each step. She gave a cry of surprise when he put her on the bed and crawled atop of her.

"Now, let's see what is under this dress," his fingers ran up her legs from under the dress, pushing the fabric up until he could see the white lacy panties she was wearing. Kit kicked her shoes off as James kissed his way up her legs. She twisted around, trying to get to the zipper and finally getting it undone. Taking a moment to slip it over her head, James proceeded to toss it on the floor and focus on the much more beautiful thing lying under him. His hands wrapped around her ribs, finding the clasp of her bra and unhooking it. He kissed every bit of skin he could see, his hands just running along the edge of her panties when a light burst into the room. A giant, ethereal wolf stood in front of them. Before it opened its mouth, kit was already up and throwing on clothes. The voice of Remus came from the animal's muzzle.

"Attack after you left. Parker fields." That was right where the wedding had been held. Kit looked at James before grabbing her wand and his hand and Apparating. She managed to cast one curse at a fleeing Death Eater before they were all gone. Kit rushed over to the others, grabbing a hold on Rose.

"Are you okay?" in the dark, Kit tried to see if she was bleeding or cut or wounded.

"Get back to our place," Sirius said gruffly before popping out of sight with Rose. Kit spun and found Peter and Remus not far off. Danielle was nowhere to be seen.

"Are you guys okay?" She helped Peter up and tried to see his face.

"I don't know. There were a lot of them. Where's Danielle?" he asked, looking up at Remus.

"I sent her home as soon as the attack started. She needed to be somewhere safe." Remus teetered from his spot, leaning on James for support. Kit grabbed his hand along with Peter's and Apparated to Sirius's flat. They landed in the living room, where a fire had been lit. In the orange light, Kit could that half of Remus's face was covered in blood.

"Merlin," she breathed, ripping her sweater off to press it to his head. "Hold this, please," Remus held the sweater to his head. "Where's Rose?" No one answered her. "Where's Rose?" Kit pushed past James to the bedroom, not caring what she might have been walking in on. The worst possible scenarios raced through her head. Rose had a miscarriage, the baby had been hurt, Sirius had been hurt, either of them were dead. Both of them were dead. She threw open the door. It slammed back in her face. Kit hurled all of her weight at the door and grabbed Sirius and pulled him out.

"I don't care what the hell you're going to do, don't you dare do it in there!"

"Kit, they-" Sirius slammed his fist against the wall and swiped a row of pictures off their pegs. The glass shattered around them, littering the floor around her bare feet.

"What if you'd done that to her?"

"I wouldn't have." He gritted out.

"Sirius," Kit looked pointedly at her arm where he was holding onto it so hard that his knuckles were white and her fingers were turning blue. He threw her away as if she'd burned him.

"I need to go," he ran past her and the door slammed a moment later. Kit looked at the bedroom door, pushing it open a crack. Rose was sitting on the edge of the bed, her dress in ruins, her hands cradling her swollen abdomen.

"I was so scared." She said, her voice barely a whisper. Kit sat beside her cousin and put a shaking hand on her stomach. What if there was nothing there, no kicking, no little fists? There was a moment of pure horror for Kit when she felt nothing, when the world seemed bare and empty. But then a little foot pressed against her palm. She gave a happy sob, relief flooding through her. But as quickly as she felt relief, she felt the same anger Sirius had felt. It was buzzing about the room. Kit stood and went back to the living room, surprised to see Sirius there, his fist bleeding and his eyes trained on a spot just past her shoulder.

"Why?" No one answered her so she asked again.

"How are we supposed to know?" Sirius snapped at her. The tension in the room spiked, all their nerves and patience shot.

"I'm just trying to get an answer." Kit ground out.

"Interrogating us isn't going to help."

"I asked one question. At least I didn't ram my fist into the bloody wall."

Sirius rose from his seat, a threat half-muttered at the short woman before him.

"Guys, calm down-" Remus stepped between them and pushed them apart.

"Calm down! We were just attacked!" Kit shouted.

"You weren't! We were. You weren't there!"

"Pads!" Remus pushed his friend down, away from Kit. "They probably attacked to get rid of the baby."

"What?"

"Rose's family is important. They probably want to get rid of any descendants as soon as possible."

"How would you know that, hm?" Sirius stepped past Kit to Remus. "Anyone else notice that Remus went missing right before we were attacked. Letting them know where we were?" Sirius pushed Remus against the wall. Remus pushed right back, sending Sirius into the back of the couch.

"How could you? I was attacked too, or have our forgotten? I would never betray any of you!"

"Where were you?"

"I was getting my jacket, Pads. You think I would cross you? What could they offer to make me betray my family?"

"A cure." Those two words hung in the air, pointed at Remus's heart like a dagger. "We all know you would give us up for a chance to be human again." It plunged into Remus's chest, something between agony and rage across his face. There was only a split second of stillness before Remus lunged at his best friend, landing blow after blow at his face. Kit and Peter tried to pull him off but with a quick swipe of his arm, Remus sent them both stumbling back. Just as Remus pulled back to strike again, the fireplace lit up with bright green flames and long, sweeping black robes swirled through the ashes.

"Interrupting, am I?" He remarked coolly. Kit pushed Snape back into the fireplace with one hand, and grabbed a fistful of Floo Powder with the other. But before she could throw it down and send him away, he grabbed her hand and folded it into her chest. He stepped out of the grate, still holding her wrist, her arm the only thing separating their bodies. His dark eyes stared down at her fuming ones.

"I've been sent to check on you." He addressed the whole group, but kept his eyes trained on Kit. She glared up at him through her brow.

"By who?"

"Dumbledore and the rest of the Order."

"See, I think you've come to make sure the job's done. You've been sent here by your precious Master." Kit sneered at him.

"I have been sent by Dumbledore. Or don't you remember the day I swore allegiance to the Order with everyone else?"

Kit grabbed his left and found the little feather burned into the swirls of his fingerprint. As she pulled up the sleeve of his robes, his face went whiter than its usual pallor. But there was no dark mark, no ink version of the gruesome scar on her calf. Above her, he asked if she was convinced.

"Rosalinda, are you alright?" He asked. Kit didn't turn, nor did she hear her cousin's response. But a moment later Severus spun and popped out of sight. Kit stared after him, flinching when James touched her shoulder. He pulled her into his chest and spoke to the group over her head.

"I think we all need to get some rest. We can talk about this tomorrow with clear heads, okay? Come to our place. Remus, you can stay over tonight." James gave Rose a quick peck before leaving with his wife. The Potter's, along with Remus, left the destroyed living room and popped into their foyer.

"Moony," Kit called when Remus tried to beat a quick escape to the guest room. "James and I trust you. Sirius is just...being Sirius."

"How can he think I'd double cross any of you for a cure?"

"I'm sure he doesn't, you were just the first one he found. If Severus had come a few minutes earlier we would have been cleaning up little bits of Snivellus." She put an arm around he briefly. "Good night."

James wrapped his arms around her and kissed her neck. "Cup of tea before bed?"

"I'll need something stronger than tea, love."

* * *

**They finally got married! About time, huh? Anyways, I'm up to date with my chapters now which means that we are nearing the end. I've only got a few more chapters in mind before this ends. I know! But there is a sequel, so don't worry. **

**I'd love to hear what you think about this story and what you hope will happen in the sequel.**

**Thanks for reading!  
Dahlia **


	31. Chapter 31

The Potter's kitchen had food spread out along the whole length of the table, Kit having gone a bit mad the previous night. Out of nowhere, she'd risen from bed and began to bake cookies. Whenever she'd been upset as a child, her mother had always taken her to the kitchen and baked with her until all Kit could think about was cookie dough and sugar. The same thing had happened last night and the following morning when she had woken up at an ungodly hour to start making breakfast for the gang. They had agreed to meet that morning to talk about what had happened the night of the attack. It had only been like yesterday, but it felt like a lifetime ago for Kit. There was enough food to feed a small army, which considering Peter, James, Sirius and Remus were all at the same table, was just going to be enough to get them to lunch. The only problem was that Sirius and Remus wouldn't look at each other, which made the whole meeting uncomfortable.

"Okay, who has something to say?" James said, Sirius immediately blurting out that Remus was a traitor.

"What evidence do you have?" Kit asked him, nibbling at a piece of toast.

"He's never around, he's always off doing something."

"I'm a werewolf, Sirius. I have to be off doing something once a month. And other than that, I have a girlfriend in Spain that I like to talk to and, unlike you, I'm trying to get a job."

"Oh, come off it, no one's going to hire you."

Remus made a lunge for Sirius from across the platter of scrambled eggs.

"Calm down!" James bellowed at them.

"Don't order me around!" Sirius snapped at his best friend.

"I'm just trying to have an actual conversation with you lot." James stood and braced his long hands against the wood.

"Well, it's not getting us anywhere is it?"

"Maybe if you shut up for once, Pads." Kit muttered.

"Oh, and what? Listen to you prattle on about how much you hate yourself or hate us?"

"Merlin, Pads, just shut your mouth!" James grabbed his friend and shoved him down into his seat. "You're stressed because of the baby, I get it, and the war and everything else that's going on, but we need to stick together. We all need each other. And suspecting one another isn't going to help."

"If you have all the answers, tell me why we were attacked?" Sirius spread his arms out at James, who ran a hand over his face.

"I didn't say that," he snapped, a ruddy tinge colouring his cheeks.

"The same reason any of us are attacked. Because Voldemort wants to hurt our family." Kit said.

"And yet again everything comes back to you," Sirius muttered.

"I'm just saying that it's true. My parents and Rose's parents are targets now, I assume, but the Dark Lord can't find them, so he's hurting us to try and draw them out."

"And why did you become so important?"

"My family has been Death Eaters since Voldemort first rose. Now we're trying to get out. It pissed him off."

"My family has been Death Eaters for a very long time. Why isn't my family being attacked?"

"Because you are the only one who isn't a Death Eater! It's like you are determined to piss off everyone in this room." Kit muttered the last part to him. He lunged at her and Kit met him head on. She landed a punch at his jaw before James pulled her back. Remus was holding Sirius back.

"Stop it!" Moony shouted at the pair of them.

"Why are you protecting him? He's the one who accused you of betraying us!"

"Because he didn't mean it."

"What makes you so sure?"

"Because you say stupid things all the time. I'm sticking up for you, you could at least be grateful."

Sirius ripping himself out of Remus's grasp. "I don't need you to stick up for me." He stalked away and Rose looked down at her hands for a moment before following after him.

"Well, this is just fantastic, isn't it?" Kit threw her hands up and growled. "Who the hell are we supposed to trust when no one will come out and _say_ anything?"

"You don't actually think any of them would betray us, do you?" James asked.

"How can you have so much blind faith in them?"

"It's not blind, Kit. These are guys I've spent my whole life with. They would never betray any of us, no matter what they were offered."

Kit thought about how she'd betrayed them when she'd been threatened with death and decided that James' argument, while nice, wasn't accurate. She rolled her eyes and shrugged out of him arms, as he had put them around her.

"You can trust me." Peter said in his squeaky voice. Kit fought the urge to say that no one cared. Merlin help them if he was their only hope.

"At least we do not have to worry about my parents anymore." Rose said as she maneuvered her swelling belly around the table. Kit hadn't noticed her come back in. She grabbed a bagel and began to spread it with strawberry jam. Her eyes were focused on the motion but unseeing. Kit stepped closer to her cousin.

"And why is that?" James snapped. Kit waved a hand at him to be quiet but Rose was already talking.

"Because they died few days ago. Dumbledore tell me in letter I get this morning." She took a bite of her bagel. Kit stared at her, brown eyes bright with disbelief.

"They were hiding. How could they have..." Kit trailed off upon seeing the tears well Rose's eyes. At first Kit didn't feel anything. It was just a fact and it wasn't as if Kit saw her Aunt and Uncle that often. But then she thought of Misha's bear hugs and the way he would tease her father and she remembered Snoya's baking and her always comforting words. Then she realized she would never feel her ribs crack from Misha's hugs or have her hair brushed calmly by her Aunt.

James put an arm around her and reached across the take Rose's hand.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly.

"I knew would happen eventually. It's just that they will never see her grow up." Rose wiped at her eye with one hand and covered her stomach with another. Kit curled into James and cried into his shoulder. Why now, with everything else that was going on? Rose's due date was in less than a month, Sirius and Remus wouldn't look at each other, James was going off soon on a mission for the Order and she didn't know where her parents were. They'd sent her a letter saying that they were going to move to a safer place and that they would contact her when they settled in. She still hadn't heard from them.

Kit didn't realize that both Remus and Peter were still in the room, but instead chose to notice that James was leading her away from the kitchen and up to the bedroom. He sat her down on the edge of the bed.

"It was a waste." She grumbled into his shoulder. He was kneeling before her, looking up at her in confusion.

"What was?"

"Everything. Rose's parents rebelling against the Dark Lord, getting out hopes up, this stupid, useless meeting." Kit waved a limp hand at the door. James caught it and held it between both of his.

"Your parents and Rose's did something amazing. Their choice made you and Rose who you are today, they allowed you to go against the Dark Lord. Misha and Sonya died for a good cause: protecting their family. Secondly, if we didn't get our hopes up we wouldn't be able to make it through a single day, Kit. Things seem like shit, and they probably are, but if we can keep our heads above it, we have a fighting chance." He sighed and pushed himself up to sit beside her on the bed.

"As for the meeting, yeah, it was kind of useless." Kit smacked him half-heartedly. "We fight, but it'll blow over soon."

"Sirius is such a jerk sometimes."

"I know. Now get some rest."

"What?"

"You were up all last night cooking, so catch up on it now."

"What are you going to do?"

"Eat all the food you made." James flashed a cheeky smile at her before closing the door behind him. Kit pulled the covers of the bed around her, not bothering to change out of her sweatpants. The sleep that had evaded her the previous night found her quickly and pulled her into a deep, dreamless sleep.

* * *

Maybe Sirius had moved on, or maybe Rose had given him a right talking to or maybe, just maybe, they had sat down and talked about it like proper adults. Whatever happened, all Kit knew was that Remus and Sirius were talking again. Kit was thankful for it.

"Don't be such a prick next time." She told Sirius as they walked to the Order meeting together. He rolled his eyes at her, but smiled. Rose was leaning into him on the other side, her belly having become a sizable addition to her figure. She was near her due date, something that the others did not forget.

"Welcome," Dumbledore said as they walked in. In the basement of his mansion, James, Remus, Peter, Sirius, Rose and Kit joined Severus, Amelia and Harper. They nodded at each other before turning to their leader.

"We have received word that the Death Eater are meeting in Old Habbard's Cross tonight. We can only guess at how many will be there. My source says it won't be much for it is a small building, but still, you must be cautious. They are planning an attack tonight, so we must find out what they are planning and when."

"And then?" Sirius asked.

"And then we get rid of as many as possible. It will be the Dark Lord's most trusted men, we cannot assume they will betray him or stay in in place long enough to contact Aurors." Dumbledore turned to face Rose. "Amelia will stay here with you. We will send a Patronus when we are finished."

"We?" Kit asked. "You're coming with us?"

"While his Death Eaters are otherwise occupied, I will be taking the opportunity to speak with the Dark Lord myself."

"Alone?" it was a silly question considering that this was Albus Dumbledore, but still, Kit asked.

"Yes. You will have our chance," he said quietly with a knowing smile. Kit nodded and fiddled with her wand.

"Ready?" Dumbledore asked, placing a rusted goblet on the table. Kit turned and kissed James firmly, just in case. She looked across at Rose, who was doing the same to Sirius. Kit turned her gaze to Severus, who was staring at a spot just past her head.

"Don't die," she told him before they were all sucked away to Old Habbard's Cross. A large field was waiting for them when they plummeted to the ground. An old, dilapidated building sat in the centre of it, flickering lights coming from within. A Death Eater stood at the front, watching for enemies. Kit lowered herself onto the grass and looked across at her husband before waving her wand and disappearing from sight. Now little more than a shadow moving along the grass, Kit ran for the building, crouching below one of the windows and listening in on the conversation. They had gone over what she was to do: listen in, get what information they needed then send up the signal to attack.

"Are you positive?" A voice said from insider the room.

"Completely."

"Misha and Sonya are already dead, why hurt their family further?"

"Because, that Black child is now part of that family. Walburga made it quite obvious how she wanted him to be treated."

"And when did we start taking orders from an old hag?"

"Watch your tongue!" The man snapped and Kit heard the sound of someone moaning in agony. "Besides, dear Katherine will come running to save her cousin. Then we will have Luka and he will forced to do as we want... as our master wants."

Kit's hand curled tighter around her wand. A chorus of shuts went up inside the building. There were more people there than she had thought. Cautiously, she raised her head up to peek in the window and saw thirty men in masks gathered around a long table. She should have waited longer, she should have waited to hear when they were planning on attacking or what exactly they were planning to do. But Kit didn't and instead sent a curse at the first man she saw. Her previous Disillusionment Charm broke as she fired it. The Death Eaters looked around, trying to find the attacker, but the guard had already found her. He threw her into the room and kicked her wand out of her hand.

"Look here. We were just talking about you." One of the men bent down and held her face, squeezing her cheeks together. "Forget the cousin, we'll just take you now." There was a round of laughter at this.

"No, remember what happened last time she was taken?" a voice asked, drawling with sarcasm. "We don't want a repeat of that, do we?" He pulled Kit up by the back of her shirt and stabbed his wand into her side. "No, I say let's get straight to the fun part."

"Let me go!" She shouted at him, stomping on his foot. She dove for her wand when he released her, catching her shirt on a nail which tore through the cotton and her skin. She fired a cruse at him and sent him flying into the wall. But no sooner had she fired a curse at him was one fired at her. From her spot on the ground she writhed in pain, clawing at the ground to make it go away. A boot collided with her stomach, sending her into the feet of her attackers. They cursed her, attacked her, kicked and pushed her until she was shaking and could barely hold her wand straight.

"Had enough?" asked the one who seemed to be the leader. Kit didn't nod, but scurried away from him. Why hadn't she sent the signal up yet? But as she tried to raise her wand to send it, he kicked it out of her hand.

"None of that." He pulled her up and aimed his wand at her. Before she could react, he muttered, "_Imperio!_" Kit felt her mind and body go numb. Her conscious was lost as they ordered her go out to the field and attack the people with her. She went out, unaware that what she was doing was wrong or that her side was bleeding. They had neared the building and as Kit approached them, she raised the wand she'd been given and cursed the first person she saw. Sirius went flying back into the grass, a long gash running up his side.

"Kit?"

She didn't turn at her name, but continued on Sirius, wand aloft and ready to fire. He rose and she sent him back again, this time with a new wound on his forehead.

"Katherine!" A hand grabbed her and held her still. "Stop it!" Severus caught her wand arm and stopping it before she sent another curse at Sirius. Kit kicked against him, scraping her foot against his shins. His face went whiter than usual, but he kept his hold on her. From the building, Death Eaters began flowing out and attacking the small group. His lips pulled back and he left Kit to attack Sirius and plunged into battle. Sirius was lying on the grass, limbs splayed out around him. He was an easy target. Kit raised her wand, ready to strike, when a curse came and knocked her to the ground. Her head cracked against a stone and as the battle raged on around her, Kit lied on the grass, completely unconscious.

* * *

It wasn't until some time later that she came to. When she did, all she could feel was a blinding pain in her temple. She moved her stiff arm to rub the spot, but winced at the pain it caused.

"You can be so daft, sometimes."

Kit opened her eyes and craned her neck to see Severus standing at the corner of her bed.

"What?"

"You went in there alone-"

"That was my order."

"And then you attacked them _by yourself!_" His face went whiter and he looked sharply away from her. "Dammit, Kit, you could have been killed. You almost killed Sirius."

"I did what?"

"But that's not even the worst of it. No, you had to go in, all riled up, before we could get any information."

Kit tried to sit up and managed to prop herself up on her elbows. "We know that they are going to attack Rose-"

"But we don't know when or where or how. What choice does that leave us? Lock her and Black up until He's overthrown?"

"I was trying to protect them."

"And you did that perfectly didn't you? the side of your head was cracked open and I doubt you'll be able to get out of bed for a day and a half." He walked away from her, muttering under his breath as he went. There was a long moment of silence, in which Kit wondered why he was here and not her husband.

"Why do you risk your own life to protect someone else's?" Severus asked at last.

"Because I care for them. Because any decent person would do that."

"Any sane person would know that there are people who need her and she wouldn't wave her life around like something so worthless."

Kit couldn't respond to him even if she'd had an explanation for her actions, for the door swung open and James strode in. Severus slid past him and out the door.

"What were you thinking!" James hissed at her when he walked in. Kit lowered herself back to the bed and put a hand over her face.

"I've just had this talk with Severus, James. I know. I mucked this one up." She rolled onto her side, away from him and tucked her knees into her chest.

"Kit," James began, sitting beside her on the bed. "I was just worried. I know you throw yourself into these kind of things, I've accepted that. But, please, don't put yourself at risk like that again." He rubbed her back, pressing a kiss against her shoulder. He felt Kit shift and watched her reach for something on the bedside table.

"Shit," Kit muttered as she held her wand, cleanly snapped in two. The eleven inch Ash wand was snapped in half, the bright orange phoenix feather peeking out. Having already felt horrible, it made Kit feel even worse to see her source of magical ability broken. She felt weaker without it already. It had been with that wand that she had cursed many Slytherin's, hoisted Severus up into a tree, sent Sirius flying across the Quidditch pitch and more memories than Kit could think about. With a long sigh she put it back on the table and pressed herself closer to James.

"Think Ollivander can fix it?"

"We'll go see him tomorrow." James said as he wrapped an arm around her. She slept in his arms for a long while, until the sun had gone down again and a strange cry woke her. It was a peculiar sound and it made Kit sit up. James had gone and, intent on finding both the source of the noise an her husband, she pulled herself out of bed and shuffled to the door. She felt sticky on the inside, like she'd begun to settle while lying in bed. Her clothes, the same one's she'd worn to the raid, were crusted with sweat, blood and dirt and clung to her uncomfortably. As she made her way down the hall, hand braced against the wall to stop the corridor from spinning quite so much, Kit noticed that she was not in her house, but in Sirius's. Why was she here, and more importantly, why had Sirius even let Severus in?

The sound grew louder as she neared the stairs, which Kit took one at a time. There was a little doorway into the kitchen, where the sound seemed to be coming from. She nudged the door open and saw something she hadn't considered. James' patronus stood in the kitchen, the head of the stag looking up at her when she opened the door fully.

"Gone to see Rose at St. Mungo's." James' voice said. Kit tried to think calmly for a moment. James had been home at some point, she remembered talking to him about her wand. Why was Rose in the hospital? Was Sirius with her? But Kit didn't know what day it was or how long it had been since they had left for the raid. She couldn't Apparate without her wand, so she shuffled over to the fireplace with a handful of Floo Powder. When everything stopped spinning, which was a good few moments after Kit had landed in St Mungo's, she asked for Rosalinda Morozov at the desk. The Healer led her up a flight of stairs which made Kit's head feel like it was floating. The woman offered Kit a potion that she waved away.

"Just get me to my cousin." She snapped, liking the idea of a chair and the sight of her family far more than some sickly coloured potion. When they reached the end of the hall, Kit saw Remus, Peter, James, Harper and Amelia sitting outside a room, looking anxiously at the door. Kit could hear the odd cry she'd heard in the house. She saw that James' wand was still lit at one end. She stumbled over to him and sat in his lap.

"You look like hell."

"I feel like it." Kit muttered and tucked her head into his shoulder, falling alseep a moment later.

"How can she sleep through that?" Remus asked as Rose gave another cry.

"I suppose we should be thankful," James said with a quick smile. Rose's cries grew quieter and before long a new cry was piercing the air. James perked up, as did everyone else save for the slumbering Kit. The door opened slowly and Sirius was standing there, his eyes unfocused and a crease of worry etched in his forehead. He had the little bundle in his arms.

"Kit," James kissed her cheek to wake her. "Do you want to see her?"

"Who?" Kit asked sleepily.

"The baby,"

Kit's head snapped up. "Rose had her baby? And I was asleep?" Kit sighed. "I am the worst cousin ever."

"And you just realized it?"

Kit gave James a look and stood to see the child. Sirius leaned away from her instinctively. It was, well, a new born baby. It was a miracle, sure, but to Kit it wasn't exactly the cute babies she'd seen before. It was red and lumpy-looking but it was snuggled against Sirius in a way that was adorable. Kit leaned in and smiled.

"She's precious," Remus said as he began cooing at the baby. She gave an odd crowing sound in response. Kit walked into the room to sit beside Rose. Her cousin's hair was stuck to her forehead, slick with sweat and tears. She looked tired and worn. Kit took her hand.

"How was it?"

"Completely worth it." Rose said, almost dreamily. Kit smiled.

"Do you have a name yet?" Kit had heard Rose go through hundreds of names over the past eight months. And the list had never seemed to have an end.

After a moment Rose said, "Dahlia Katherine Black."

Kit could only stare at her cousin. "Like the flower?"

"Like the flower."

Then it hit Kit that they had used her name. "Dahlia Katherine Black," she mumbled as she looked at the bundle in Sirius's arms. It sounded right. Rose gave her hand a squeeze, making Kit smile.

"It sounds perfect."

* * *

**Long time since an update, huh? I will frank and say that I had no inspiration to write for a very long time. then I logged on a few days ago and saw that I had a review and it made me want to keep going since someone was still reading. I know there are people who have this on their alerts, and thank you for that! It's nice to know that people want this continued. :)**

**A big thanks to: i luv odd socks, WereRanga, artsandlife, ashleyjaneli, jasminebrooke, dreamer, and Twilitefan, for reviewing! Especially to Twilitefan for bringing me back to this fic. I really appreciate every bit of it.**

**Also, a huge thanks to Bridge, who named her character after me! I didn't even ask for it and it is awesome. :) **

**I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter and I am currently writing the next one. Thank you for sticking by this fic.**

**Dahlia**


	32. Chapter 32

She stood in Sirius and Rose's house, her hand in James'. This was going to be interesting. Rose was in the kitchen, getting things ready. It had been a month since Dahlia had come into the world and in that time Sirius and Rose had managed about ten hours of sleep. So Kit and James had offered their home for a full day. They would stay there, have a decent day of rest and she and James would take care of the baby. It couldn't be that difficult.

"She is sleeping now, bless her," Rose said, leading Kit and James into the kitchen. "If she cries, playing, or feed her. Milk and formula. Heat it up in warm water, test it on your wrist. Don't let it be too hot or it'll upset her. Body temperature." She pulled Kit away and led her to the living room. "Play time is here. Mobile to look at, toys in the corner. Diaper changing in the bathroom. Use cream!"

"Rosie, we'll be fine. Just go get some sleep." Kit could see the dark circles under her eyes and pushed her away to where Sirius was waiting.

"Floo if you need anything!" They were gone and the house was silent. Kit turned to James.

"Well, this should be fun!" Kit put an arm around James and sat down with him on the couch, admiring her new wand. While it didn't have the same memories that her old one had, it was the same but just a bit longer. It felt at home in her hands, which she hadn't been expecting.

"You are waiting to put that to use, aren't you?"

"Of course," Kit smiled at him and poked his cheek with the end of her wand.

"Come here, you!" James tackled her and wrapped his arms around her, kissing her cheek.

"Ew, gross!" Kit hissed childishly, mindful of the child slumbering down the hall. But her efforts were in vain when a high scream came from the room. Kit jumped up with James and she ran down the hall, scooping the little girl into her arms.

"What's the matter, huh? Were your Aunt and Uncle being too loud?" Kit asked Dahlia, her voice bright and silly sounding. It was the way everyone spoke to babies. "Yeah, we were. I'm sorry about that, Lia." Kit started swaying around the room, rocking the baby in her arms. James watched, smiling at the pair as he leaned against the door frame. Kit started humming to her.

"Don't sing, Kit. You'll upset her even more." James said with a smirk.

"Uncle James is being very mean, isn't he?" Kit asked Dahlia, who gurgled at James. "See, she doesn't like you either. Good thinking." She nodded at the baby. They walked around the house, bouncing along the music that wasn't playing. James went off and found an old radio, which he flicked on and the three of them danced in the living room, making Dahlia squeal happily.

"Look at that smile!" Kit pressed her nose against Dahlia's and kissed the soft skin there. But Dahlia gave a wail a moment later, shattering the happy moment they had been sharing.

"Why are you crying?" Kit asked the baby, who was wriggling around in her arms. Kit tried snuggling with her, singing to her, waving a toy in front of her but the screeching continued.

"Help!" She held Dahlia out to James who looked at the child in confusion before scooping her up.

"Please stop crying?" James tried. It didn't work. "What am I supposed to do?"

"I don't know! Keep her entertained while I get the formula ready." Kit nearly ran into the kitchen, pouring hot water into a pot and putting a bottle in like she'd seen Rose do before. She could hear James shaking her toys in an attempt to make her stop crying. At one point it went quiet.

"Ha-ha!" James whooped from the living room. Dahlia burst into tears a second later. "Crap," he muttered, bringing the unhappy child into the kitchen. Kit tested the milk against her wrist and motioned James over.

"Give her to me." Kit plucked the bottle out of the water and popped it into Dahlia's mouth. She sucked on it happily, making Kit and James sigh in relief.

"All that fuss over a bottle?" Kit asked James as she fed the baby. "So Sirius's child."

James laughed and sat with Kit at the table, looking at Dahlia over her shoulder. "She's beautiful." She was. Her bright blue eyes were all Rose and she had that super soft peach fuzzy hair that all babies had in a deep black. Kit could have snuggled with her all day long. Everything about her was adorable; her button nose, her bright eyes and long lashes, her little, inquisitive hands. Dahlia pushed the bottle away and gave a little burp.

"Oh!" Kit said and leaned her over her shoulder, gently patting her back. "Can you get me a towel?" she asked James who brought one from the bathroom a moment later.

"How do you know what to do?" he asked.

"I don't know, really. I watched Rose do it a few times. Other than I guess it's just instinct." Kit shrugged as much as she could without disturbing the baby.

"You'd make a great mother."

Kit's eyes flickered away from James as she pretended that she hadn't heard him. Flashes of her old nightmares came back, of the boy she couldn't place being followed by the Dark Lord, being killed by the Dark Lord. He looked so much like James that now it was obvious what she dreams had been about and although there wasn't a single Seer in her family so she couldn't be sure it was true, Kit was too scared that it was. She didn't want to have a child knowing what could be waiting for them.

"Let's get to sleep," Kit said to Dahlia. She gave a yawn in response and Kit walked over to the crib and put her in. She leaned on the side of it and watched Dahlia sleep peacefully. She felt James' hands slip around her. He bent his head into the curve of her neck and kissed her gently.

"Kit, we could do it." He said against her skin.

"No. I can't."

"What?"

Kit turned to face him. His glasses were slipping down his nose but behind them his eyes were filled with worry. "Why?"

"Back at the cottage, when I was out for a few days I kept having these nightmares."

"I know. I was there. You wouldn't let go of me once you woke up."

"I kept dreaming that He would kill one of you and make me watch. But then there was someone else, a boy. Sometimes he was just a baby, others he was our age. But he looked so much like you a-and I knew I had to protect him but I couldn't. I could never save him. He was our child, I'm sure of it and I can't...I won't have a kid knowing that He's waiting out there for him."

James brushed the hair from her face and held her cheeks. "But we're fighting against him now and when we win, there won't be anyone to hurt our son."

"But what if we don't win? What something happens to one of us, James? What happens to him then?"

"Rosie and Sirius will take care of him like he's their own. But that won't happen. We are going to get through this war. And when we do-"

"James, please, I don't want to have a child."

"Just wait until this is all over, you'll think differently then."

"Why are you so set on having kids suddenly?"

"What? I'm not supposed to want to bring life into the world?"

"You are being ridiculous."

"You are being ridiculous. You are so upset about a nightmare that wasn't even true. You're letting it control your life. You might as well be letting Him call the shots."

"Don't say that, James. I'm just scared and I won't have kids until I know that he is dead and gone and we'll all be safe."

"That could take years!"

"Well, if you are so set on having kids, then you can wait, can't you?"

"Kit, why are you being unreasonable?"

"I'm not being unreasonable! We are nineteen, James. Nineteen! People don't get married and have kids when they are nineteen! You only want a kid because Sirius looked so goddamned happy at St. Mungo's." Dahlia started wailing in her crib, high-pitched screams breaking their argument.

"You want to be a father, be one to her." Kit stormed away, slamming the front door behind her. it was well into the evening now, a red hue cast over the city. Kit walked into an alleyway and Apparated back to her house. Rose and Sirius were cuddling on the couch, barely awake when she walked in. They both looked up when she arrived.

"Who is taking care of Dahlia?" Rose asked.

"James is." Kit snapped and walked into the kitchen, ducking down to where they kept the firewhiskey and pouring herself a large drink.

"Go," she told Sirius,who rose with a stretch and popped out of sight.

"What is wrong?"

"What's wrong is your happy little life is making James think he wants it to. Now he wants kids. Next thing he'll want us to move to the country and have enough children to have our own Quidditch team." Kit scoffed and drank from her glass, feeling the alcohol burn the back of her throat.

"I'm not convinced that you guys are all that happy. No offense."

Rose lifted her hands and shook her head.

"I mean, we're so young and, Merlin, I married _James Potter!_" Kit sighed and put her head in her hands. "I can't keep up with him. He wants to live in this perfect world where we'll defeat the Dark Lord and everything will be all sunshine and rainbows. I just can't see it panning out like that. I mean, at the end of the day none of us are going to make it out of this intact. Am I the only one who understands that?"

Rose put her hand over her cousin's. "No, but most of do not like to think about that. James is probably just trying to make the best of what is going on now. It is hard to think about losing to Him, so most of choose to live in bliss."

"But what good is that? Live in bliss, have a family then have it taken away?" Kit shook her head. "No, I can't live like that."

"Then what do you plan to do?"

"Defeat Him."

* * *

Kit and James hadn't spoken in two days. Kit was resolute in her decision not to talk to him, determined to prove something. She didn't quite know what that was yet, but she knew she had to prove something. But all the while there was one thing on her mind. She would think about it all day until she felt almost twitchy with excitement and nervousness. But it had to be done. It _needed_ to be done. She just couldn't have anyone find out about it. So when James was still asleep, Kit snuck out into the night and Apparated. She came to the mansion and hesitantly knocked on the door. To her surprise, Albus answered the door and beckoned her inside.

"What a surprise," he said, although he sounded as if he wasn't surprised at all. He looked as if he had been up all night. For the first time since Kit had known him, Dumbledore looked old.

"Sir, I have a favour to ask."

"As do I." He led her to a sitting room and offered her a piece of toffee.

"No thanks, sir." Kit smiled as he tucked into a piece, taking his time to chew and consider her as he did.

"I have the odd suspicion we are about to ask the same thing." He noted. "I wish to ask you to accompany me to a meeting with the Dark Lord."

"I wanted to ask if there was a way I could go with you on one of your strange and mysterious meetings." Kit smiled at him as he smiled at her over his glasses.

"Why me, sir?"

"Because, Katherine, you have a drive like I have never seen. You have your heart set on defeating him and you won't stop until you do. You are powerful."

"Thank you, sir." Kit sat forward in her chair and leaned her elbows on her knees. "When we go to see him, I don't want to be hiding somewhere. I want this to be a fair fight. I want to face him."

"While I agree with part of your statement, I cannot say that you are ready to face him. He is a very dark and powerful wizard and he will no doubt have his men with him. To face him alone would be suicide and it is something I cannot let you do. However, if you will accompany me on one of our...visits, I can ensure your safety."

"Where would we go?"

"Lord Voldemort has not made it difficult to locate him. It is just that his manor is heavily guarded."

"You've been there before."

"Yes, I guess I try to talk sense into him."

Kit scoffed. "Don't you think he's a bit beyond that point?"

"Sadly, yes." Dumbledore looked away for a moment, narrowing his eyes at the leg of the chair Kit was sitting in. "But he sees something in you. He finds you...interesting." Dumbledore brought his gaze back to his former student. "Your whole family intrigues him. Their betrayal, their lives now, their power; he can't let go of them, and through that, you. He hasn't see Rose now that she has a child, but he knows about Dahlia."

"Rose is not coming." Kit said, though it was unnecessary.

"I would never allow it. But with you there, he will be distracted and perhaps shed light on more of his plans."

Kit nodded and looked down at her hands. There was one question she needed to ask. "Do you trust me?"

Dumbledore smiled slowly as he leaned back. "Katherine, before you were unprepared and young. In a very short time you have grown up. You have a family to fight for now, a husband." He brought his hands up to rest under his chin. "I never doubted you would be able to fight him. I simply worried that you were fighting for the wrong reasons. When you are young, it is difficult to differentiate between in what you believe in and fighting in what you should believe in. At first, you were fighting because you were angry that he had broken you. Now, you fight to defeat him to protect your family."

Across from him, Kit gave a half-grin. She didn't want to admit that her previous attempts had been selfish, but they had been. She had something to fight for now, she had to fight for her niece and goddaughter and for her husband. Kit nodded and took Dumbledore's offered hand.

"I will contact you when the time arrives." He gave Kit's hand a firm shake waved her goodbye.

"Goodbye, sir." Kit popped out of sight and into her kitchen.

"Where were you!"

Kit spun to see James glaring at her from the other end of the kitchen. His glasses were sitting crookedly across his nose and his hair was sticking up in front as well, as if he'd been running his hands through it. He was still in his pyjamas, which consisted of a pair of boxers and his old Quidditch jersey. The chill that still clung to the house in March didn't seem to affect him.

"I was visiting Dumbledore."

"In the middle of the night?"

Kit, who had begun to climb the stairs, stopped at stared at her husband. "And what excatly do you mean by that?"

"I don't think you're offer having a raging love affair with someone, so don't assume that." James snapped. "Could it have not waited until the morning?"

"Maybe it couldn't have." Kit shrugged and continued her ascent to the bedroom.

"Kit," James began, catching her wrist as she turned into the room. "I won't say I'm sorry about wanting kids, because I'm not. I'm sorry I upset you." He pulled her into him and pressed a kiss against the top of her head. Kit sighed and wrapped her arms around him. Maybe it wasn't so wrong that he wanted kids. Maybe someday she would be ready for it. James held her there for a long moment, holding her in one of those hugs that made you feel warm, and safe and cared for. He was so tall that her entire frame was covered by his. Kit kissed his chest and pulled away.

"Let's get some sleep." She led him to the bedroom and closed the curtains against the rising sun and curled into bed with him.

* * *

The days that passed felt long and drawn out. Kit waited and watched the clock anxiously, flicking her wand around her fingers as the slow hours crept on. She filled her time reading spell books with hexes and curses she would need. James was happy to not be fighting with her. The long two weeks were punctuated by visits from Rose and Sirius and little Dahlia, who now resembled a baby as opposed to a lumpy red thing. James, cautious of their conversation, spent most of the visit being a father to Dahlia beside Sirius. The two of them were wrapped in her little hand. Kit would usually smile and coo at her niece then tuck herself into the couch and read whatever textbooks she had picked up.

"Why is she studying now?" Sirius asked once, Dahlia gurgling happily as he bounced her around on his knee.

"Not a clue." James said with a laugh. "She's focused on something, but she won't tell me."

"I don't know how you're still with her."

James gave his best friend a steady look. "I love her, Pads. Nothing could change that."

"Right, right," Sirius muttered, looking back to Rose, who was in the kitchen warming up Dahlia's formula.

"Did you get an owl from Remus?" Sirius asked a moment later.

"Last week. Are you coming with us?"

"I convinced Rose to let me go." Sirius gave her a sweet smile. It was the full moon that night and Remus had contacted them all and asked if they would meet in a forest. Kit of course let James go; it was Remus. Sirius looked at his watch and passed Dahlia off to Rose.

"Time to head off." He bent and kissed her cheek and the top of Dahlia's head. James gave Kit a kiss.

"Don't get killed." Kit said with a smile.

"Same to you." James winked at her before going off with Sirius. Rose smiled and told Kit that she was taking Dahlia back to put to sleep.

"I can come back if you want."

"It's fine. Get some rest." Kit hugged her cousin goodbye and was left with a very empty house. It was the first time in a very long time that kit was alone. Since she and James had gotten married, quickly followed by the arrival of little Dahlia, it felt as if she never had a moment alone. And despite what she told herself, she found that she felt a little uneasy being alone in the house. She needed people, she thrived off of being around other personalities. But maybe some down time would be good for her. Kit poured a big mug of tea and drew her knees up to her chest. She lifted the heavy, dog-eared curse book she'd borrowed from Sirius from the bedside table and balanced it on her knees. The darker curses were near the back, which was exactly where Kit began reading. A part of her couldn't believe she was going to face Him again. She must have been crazy to accept the offer, but it needed to be done; perhaps only for her own sanity. She needed to prove to herself and to those around her that she was stronger than she had been last Christmas, that she would stand up and defy him.

Kit wondered if this would be it. Partnered with Dumbledore, how could they lose? What if this was it? What if after the meeting, the Dark Lord was no more? She toyed around with the idea of being a hero and idol, which at first seemed nice, but the attraction dimmed when she realized that she would have to be a role model and live up to what people expected of her. A life of constant adventure was what she wanted, but without the responsibility it brought with it. Kit frowned. She was never meant to have kids then. If responsibility scared her, along with having to be a role model, she wasn't cut out to have children. Rose had always been mothering. Kit had been too brash and boyish to be a mother. James was the same with a bit of a softer side. But if she had a kid, they would need someone to rough house with and play Quidditch with. But they also needed someone to kiss their bruises better and fix up their scrapes and cuts. Kit couldn't do that and she didn't think James could either. No, being Dahlia's Aunt and Uncle would be fine for them.

She was ripped from her pondering by a loud _pop! _Alube stood before her, powerful and mighty-looking with a serious look in his eye.

"It is time."

* * *

**Sorry for the abominably short chapter! I really wanted to put this one out but I didn't want to put the next part in this chapter. So, I made this short one to hold you over :P**

**I just want to say thank you so much to everyone who reviewed! It actually made my day (okay, my week or possibly my whole year). It really gave me hope for this fic! So thank you. I wish some of you had accounts so I could message you and get some more opinions and thank you for reviewing. But I am back and I am hoping to get the next chapter out soon. I have it all planned out and it will be epic!**

**As always, thank you so much!**

**Dahlia **


	33. Chapter 33

The sound of the key sliding into the lock sounded like a deck of Exploding Snap cards as James tried to get in quietly. He didn't want to wake Kit up. She'd been so tired lately. He and Kit had been to so many Order meetings and duels and battles that he couldn't keep track of them anymore. Weariness had settled into both of them. James didn't even know what month it was anymore. As he walked into the living room, he caught sight of the clock that sat on the mantle and saw that it was December. It seemed like yesterday that Dahlia was just a newborn, gurgling and drooling everywhere. Just last week she had taken her first waddling steps. James chuckled quietly as he remembered how excited Sirius had been when he Flooed. Like a kid on Christmas or like they had just won the Quidditch Cup. But despite James' laugh, he felt a dull longing to have the same thing. He was envious of Sirius had the fact that he had a daughter to raise and play with. Sirius had someone who looked up to him, who expected to be protected and taken care of, and James wished he had the same. It was an old argument between he and Kit, one that had ending in many nights on the couch or at Sirius's flat. He loved Kit with all his heart, but he couldn't let some nightmare stand in the way of finally having a family.

Now there was talk of a prophecy of a child that would bring down the Dark Lord. None of them could decide if it was a glimmer of hope or yet another thing to dread. Even James, who desperately wanted a child, couldn't wish that on one. The burden that kid would have to carry, to know what he would have to do... It was more than any single person could handle. He wished he could get that message across to Kit. She'd made her mission to defeat the Dark Lord and she personally stood against him three times since he'd risen. She'd fought alongside other too many times to count. It made James' head spin to think of how many time he'd scoured a building or field looking for her, only to find her lying down or leaning, bleeding and weak. Or he would leave to spend a full moon with Remus and come home to find her missing and in a room at St. Mungo's. It was driving him mad! He wanted to throttle her until she realized that every time he saw her laid out on a bed, trembling and weak, it felt as if his heart stopped beating. Every time he watched her run into battle, he could feel each attack against her as if it had hit him.

He wished it would hit him instead.

His tired mind was spiralling down into a darkness it knew all too well. When James thought of how often Kit risked her life, he also thought of how he wasn't doing the same. Sure, he was on the same battleground, fighting the same war, but he wasn't running to the front line, ready to attack. He was far too busy trying to stop Kit from dying. What sort of husband was he that he couldn't even take care of his wife? He couldn't protect her, he couldn't save her, not when she was willingly running out and putting her life on the line. She thought that because the Dark lord considered her valuable he wouldn't kill her. James knew the Dark Lord's patience for her would one day wear thin and that would be it.

James tripped on a stair as he tried to walk up to their bedroom. The room was too far and he was too tired and frustrated to walk any further. So he sunk down and sat on the stairs with his head between his hands. What had happened? He found himself wondering. A year ago they had been happy and carefree. A year ago the Marauder's had spent time together and enjoyed life. Now it seemed like each day was a battle. Kit was snapping at him and Rose and Sirius, James didn't have patience for Sirius's ramblings. Remus was more on edge than ever, his break up from Danielle making things ten times worse. And Peter was stressed from trying to make everyone happy again. When the six of them, seven if you counted Dahlia, finally got together, Peter did little more than squeak when things got tense.

Where would they all be a year from now? Hell, where would they all be a month from now? Would they even be alive? James groaned and pressed his head further into his hands. He went still and quiet and just listened to the sounds of the house. But as he sat and listened, a sound caught his ear. He lifted his head and looked to the bedroom, where he could hear to soft sound of crying. Brows furrowed above his glasses, James stood and slowly pushed the door open. He found Kit lying on her side, curled into a ball on the covers. Her back shook as she wept and he could see her hand lift to wipe her tears away. James sat on the edge of the bed and rubbed her back, knowing it was better to stay silent for now. Kit turned and allowed herself to be gathered up by him. He drew her into his chest, wrapped his arms around her and let her cry. Bouts of crying and fits of rage had been common lately and James knew that it was best for both of them if they waited it out.

"What's wrong?" He asked at long last when she had grown quiet and still, though little hiccups still shook her shoulders. Kit shook her head and buried it in his shirt. James sighed and ran his hand through her hair.

"James," Kit said against his shirt. She gripped his torso before speaking. "I'm pregnant."

While the admission brought a new round of tears from Kit, James felt as if the air had been punched out of him. He was going to be a father. He was going to be...a father.

"Merlin," he breathed out, grinning as he did. He kissed the top of her head and held her tighter against him. "Kit..."

"James, please..." But it was useless. James was already up and about, Flooing Sirius and Remus and Peter to come over so he could share the great news. "James." Her _loving_husband didn't pay her any attention until she was crying again.

"James, I'm scared. Can you just hold me?" Kit managed to get out between cries. James froze for a moment before gathering her up in his arms. They stood together, wrapped in each other's arms.

"Kit, you don't have to be scared. I'm going to be here every step of the way. I'll protect y-you _both_no matter what. I promised that my love for you would always protect you, and it will. I solemnly swear." James added with a grin and pressed his forehead against Kit's.

* * *

"I can't believe it!" Rose rushed in and threw her arms around Kit. Sirius was behind her, little Dahlia in his arms. Kit chuckled and nodded.

"Neither can I." She tried to smile fully but fear clutched at her stomach, right above where the little one was growing. The nightmares had started and they were so vivid, so blood-curdling realistic that Kit hated the thought of going to sleep. Despite the fact that she was surrounded by her friends and supposed to be happy, Kit started to cry into Rose's shoulder. She couldn't do this. Not now, not ever. This _thing_growing inside of her would depend on her, she would have to protect it and keep it from harm. She couldn't do that. She couldn't take care of someone. She could hardly manage to take care of herself.

James tried to put an arm around her and pull her away from Rose, but Kit pushed him off. She needed Rose now.

"Kit," James began, Remus and Sirius offering similar words of comfort. Kit rounded on them.

"What? What do you know about this? What could you say to reassure me? I have to carry this around for nine months and take care of it for the rest of my life. I have to protect it. But what if I can't? What if something happens? What then? Do I leave them in the hands of strangers?" Kit sobbed and Rose wrapped her arms around her cousin.

"They're trying to help, Kit. I know it is scary. I had...thoughts when I was pregnant with Dahlia." Rose confessed quietly. Sirius shifted Dahlia to one arm and put the other around Rose. She nodded sadly at him. "But then, after all the sleepless nights and worries, you realize that she is something beautiful and that it was all worth it."

"But what about after all of that? What if they're born and something happens to us? What if-"

"You can't keep thinking about what ifs. Sometimes you just have to live."

"But I keep having these nightmares a-and I can't forget them! Something's going to happen."

"We're in the middle of a war, Kit. Of course something's going to happen." Remus said quietly.

"Exactly why we shouldn't have a child. I'm going to be stuck here while you are risking your lives."

"Kit, you needed to stop. You were running out for every mission, every battle. You were wearing yourself down to nothing." James rubbed her shoulder. The number of time she had run off into battle only to come back worn down and weak. It was like she felt she had to defeat him alone, like she was responsible for it all. James knew her too well for her to hide it. He could see it in her eyes every time she went out. He could see the frustration and disappointment every time she was brought back, lying battered on a bed, frustrated with herself that she couldn't stop them all. James felt a strong urge to hold her to his chest and keep her there until...until everything was over. He wanted to tell her that it wasn't her fault and that she was doing more for them, for everyone, than anyone could have hoped. James pulled Kit away from Rose and buried his face in her hair, trying to keep the sudden tears hidden. A desperation to keep her safe had stuck him so strongly in the gut that he nearly groaned at it. Instead, he kept Kit close to him, face hidden in her hair.

Was this how parents felt? A gut-wrenching desire to keep their family safe? All James knew it that he couldn't let go of Kit, not now, not ever.

* * *

She had just kissed him goodbye and she didn't know if it was for good or not. James and the others had gone off to fight and she was stuck at the Headquarters. Rose was sitting beside her, clutching her hand between her own.

"It never gets easier." Rose said with a small smile. "But they have always come back. James will come back."

Kit gave her cousin a quick grin before rising to walk around. She was four months along now, a little bulge just visible from under her shirt. She knew she needed to walk because she felt little bubbles there, like a fizzy drink. She rubbed her stomach absently as she paced. Sometimes, after a big meal, especially after a big plate of pasta, she would feel a little kick. A substantial sign that he was alive. They had named it Jack for now. Jackie if it was a girl and Jack if he was a boy. Kit felt her heart flutter suddenly and a little foot push against her in reaction to it. She stopped and rubbed the spot Jack had kicked soothingly.

"Shh," she told her stomach quietly. Behind her, Dahlia started to wail, pounding against her crib. Rose tried walking with her, feeding her and burping her but little Dal was not happy.

"Go on. Take her home." Kit said.

"Are you sure. I'll come right back."

"Don't be ridiculous, stay with her, get some sleep."

"You'll be okay?"

"I'm sure I will be." Kit gave Rose a hug goodbye and was soon left in a very empty room. Kit paced again, trying to to count the seconds that seemed to drag by. Time hadn't felt steady the last few months. Time either stood still or went by quicker than a snitch. Some days, when Jack was restless and Kit had a sharp, tight pain in her back, time didn't move. Minutes seemed like hours and hours seemed like days. She didn't know what was to blame for it, the war or the baby. Her small hand reached up to lifted her hair from her neck. The blazing fire along with her pacing had forced a dampness to grow along her neck. Kit wiped at it and sunk down on the couch. Her feet tapped out a nonsense rhythm, her fingers mimicking it on her leg.

Long seconds ticked by and turned into minutes, which stretched into an hour. Kit's panic rose with each passing chime of the clock. Why hadn't James come back yet? What if he was dead? How was she supposed to have a child and raise it by herself? Was this how James felt when she went off? A thousand questions filled her head, mixing and churning in her mind until they were a jumble of words and worries. But her mind was forced to be wiped clean when there was a pop and a man stumbled towards her.

"Severus!" Kit held him up as he tumbled into her and led him to the couch as best she could. Blood stained his hands and now ruined the front of her shirt. He groaned as she made him lie flat on the worn couch. She forgot about hating him and about who she thought he was. In four months he had become an ally to her and the Order.

"Where are you hurt?" she asked him, wand ready as her free hand checked his arms and chest for wounds. He didn't speak but hiss as she hand passed over his chest, just below his collarbone. Why wasn't Rose here? Kit wasn't the one who had been training to be a Healer.

"I don't know what to do!" Kit hissed, her voice creeping into hysteria. James had to deal with this every time she had gone out. Why, _why_had she put him through this?

"Just use a numbing charm. I'll be fine." He ground out from behind his clenched teeth. Kit nodded and waved her wand across his torso. He relaxed instantly, a shaking hand reaching up to wipe his brow. Kit scooted away from him to sit on the edge of the couch, her head down, one hand rubbing her stomach. Jack was kicking from the rush of adrenaline and Kit was doing her best to calm him.

"You're going through with it?" Snape asked.

"With what?"

"Having his child."

"Well, I can't go back now, can I?" Kit turned to looked seriously at him. "Not that I would. I love James."

Snape grimaced and sat up, effortlessly because of the charm. "Why?"

"Why do you care?"

"Because our best fighter is out for good." Snape said dryly, looking to her for only a moment before going back to the wall. A long moment stretched on, Snape's lips growing tighter with each second before he rose and pulled her up with him.

"Because I lo...love you. I have since we first met."

Kit felt like ice had been poured into her blood. She tried to push him away but he held onto her arms like he couldn't bear to let go.

"No, we hate each other. You're...you're one of _them_! You've hated me for years!"

"I had to! You would never...so I had to. I tried to hate you right down to my core. I tried to hate everything you did, but I couldn't. It was like fighting who I was!" He was breathless as he spoke, like the very thought of her knocked the breath out of him.

"You should have fought harder!"

"Katherine-"

"_Don't_ _call me that_!"

"Kit, if I could find a way to go on hating you, to not feel an ache everytime I think of you and Potter, to not feel my insides twist when I think of your child, I would. But I can't. I can't move on." His hand moved from her arm to spread across her stomach, where little Jack was lying still. "To know that if I had done something differently, this could be mine-"

"Nothing you could have done would change that." Kit ripped herself away from him. She felt violated, through her skin down to her bones and heart, but beyond that, her soul. He had tried to claim something that was so personal, so _hers _and _theirs_. She felt sick. His hands had left a bloody hand print on her shirt, right over the bump of her pregnancy. Seeing it, she retched dryly, her stomach churning.

"Kit," He reached to hold her, worried at her sudden sickness.

"Get off of me!" Kit threw her arm out and knocked him back and stared at him from across the room. "How? Better yet _why?_"

"How could I not?"

"Snape-"

"Please, Kit."

"No. Snape, I love James."

Snape's face twisted, his lips drawing back into a sneer, but behind that there was a hurt that ran deeper than Kit could imagine.

"You love him? When he tried to dictate your life? When he went behind your back?"

"People make mistakes."

"And yet you won't forgive me mine?"

A long silence passed between them. Kit shook her head finally and sucked a breath in.

"I can't, Severus. I won't."

"Why? Because you're afraid of what he'll say? Because you think I'm a Death Eater?" Snape walked to her and tried to touch her arm, but she skittered away.

"Because you made a choice long ago about who you were. Because I love James. Because you are Snape, someone who never did a thing besides following Malfoy around."

"Kit-"

"Because I will never love you!" Kit pushed him away, her hands squishing in his wound. Snape's lips tightened but he seemed frozen, staring at her. She growled and Disapparated, but just before she popped away, he could see tears shimmering in her eyes. Then he was alone and he put a hand out to where she had just been.

"I always loved you."

* * *

**Long time no see, huh? I've been really busy and I will be for the next little while, but I am a chapter or two from finishing this fic. A HUGE thank you to people who reviewed and added this to their alert list, from the very beginning or just now, it all means so much to me! I'm sad to see this end but I hope you guys enjoyed reading this as much as I loved writing it. **

**I did do a time jump because things were getting slow and I couldn't find the proper muse. The next chapter takes place on October 30th, so happy Halloween! **

**If you guys liked this fic over all, I would really appreciate if you spread the word. Tell a friend, mention it on a blog, or just continue liking it from wherever you read fics. I appreciate each and every one of you, I smile at each view, each hit and each review and subscription. I just want to say thank you to everyone who read this fic and I hope you stay tuned for the last chapter. **

**Dahlia**


	34. Chapter 34

If asked, there was a single moment that every wizard knew of. Every wizard knew of the day Harry Potter vanquished the Dark Lord. But if you asked a smaller group of witches and wizards they would tell you there was one moment that would never leave their minds. A single moment when they could feel something had gone terribly wrong. Remus dropped the mug of tea he had been drinking, Sirius watched as the air left Rose's lungs and she began to cry. He could feel it to, the way the whole world seemed off kilter for a moment. By the time he had recovered, the mark could be seen floating over a house, one he had never noticed or been to before. And as he flew in it was apparent he was far too late.

* * *

Kit sat huddled up on the couch little Harry tucked in her arms. She stroked his head, the fine, soft hairs of jet black that had sprouted up. She remembered the pain of giving birth to him but it was quickly pushed aside by memories of him giggling at her, or falling asleep in her arms, his little fingers wrapped around one of hers. He was sleeping now, his small pink mouth puckered. Kit pressed a kiss to his forehead and got up as slowly as she could.

"Hey, hon." She kissed the top of James' head, taking in that familiar smell of him. He was reading the Prophet, a deep frown between his brows. It lessened when he saw her but never truly left. It hadn't left since they'd moved to Godric's Hollow. The move had taken a toll on them. It was hard to be away from their friends and what little family they had left. In the beginning there were days when she would be holding Harry and just burst into tears. But James was always there to calm her and be with her.

"Want to put Harry to bed?" she asked and James gathered the sleeping boy in his arms. Kit watched as his whole demeanour changed when he held his son. She may have had her doubts but he was the perfect father. Kit could see James teaching Harry how to play Quidditch, training him to be the next best Chaser. Kit smiled softly as James carried Harry up. Once he was out of sight she went to the living room and pulled their wedding photo down from the mantle. It was there as a constant remind of what was waiting for her when this was over, if it would ever end. It was a reminder of when things had been wonderful. But on the back of the picture filled with smiling faces was something else. A note Kit had started writing the night before while James was out. It was foolish but she felt like she needed to say something. She was almost finished but there was one more person left. Kit laid it out on the table and re-read what she had written.

_I don't really know who will find this. I hope it's someone I knew, someone who knew me. I'm not really sure why I'm writing this. I just have this feeling that something is wrong. And this picture just reminds me of when things were right. Today is October 30th and James has just gone out. He'd think I'm mad for doing this and leaving it in the old house, but I just want to leave something behind. If someone finds this and we're no_

Here, Kit had crossed out words that didn't seem right. It was hard to admit that you would die soon. It was even worse to try and write it down.  
_And we're gone, just remember us like this. Things got bad lately and I hate to think that everyone will remember me like that. If any of them are around, Rose, Sirius, Remus or Peter, ask them. They'll tell you how things really were. Merlin, I ramble. It's just hard to take this seriously. I just don't want to say it. I know about the prophecy, I know everything and I can't even say it. I'm probably dead by the time someone gets this. If I am, just pass a message along for me, whoever you are._

_Sirius Black, you stupid bugger. I never thought you'd treat her right, but you did. You did everything to help us. Thanks._

_Remus Lupin. I'm sorry for ever doubting you. I'm sorry I was never there when you needed me. I just hope you can forgive me._

_Peter Pettigrew, you have done something I never thought you would. You gave everything up to help us. I can never thank you enough for what you did._

Kit summoned a quill and took a deep breath. What could she say to Rosie in the space left? How could she ever say everything that she needed to? Kit closed her eyes and remembered the smiling face of her cousin.

_Rosalinda Morozov. You made my life wonderful. You made me smile each day. I never told you enough. I should have trusted you more. I miss you more than words can explain. I can't bear to think that I might never see you again. You're family. I dragged you into this and for that I'm truly sorry. I never meant to. I see you with Lia and want to pull you away from here, keep you safe from harm. But I know we couldn't have done any of it without you. I couldn't have done any of it without you. I love you, cousin._

_Katherine Potter_

Kit signed her name with some effort before putting the picture back in its frame. She closed her eyes and thought of her room at her old house, covered in posters and pictures. She wanted to go there so badly but she'd been told the stay inside at all times since moving. So instead she imagined it and flicked her wand at the portrait until it was whisked out of sight. All she could hope for now was that someone, sometime would find it. She swallowed the lump that was forming in her throat as James came down the stairs.

"Fast asleep. I remember Sirius complaining about how long it took Lia to get to sleep." James shook his head and looked up to the nursery. "That boy is special, I'll tell you that much." He sat beside her on the couch and put an arm around her.

"I wish we could see them." Kit said quietly after a long moment.

"Me too." James sighed and pulled her closer. The sounds of muggle trick or treaters could be heard in the silence that followed and seemed to stretch on for hours. Time stretched on until the sun dipped below the horizon and the muggle kids all went home for the night. And before Kit realized it, James was wiping tears from her cheeks. She buried her face in his shoulder and stayed like that for a long time, his hand rubbing circles on her back until Harry's cries forced her to move.

"I'll go," she said, wiping her face clean before going up to see her son. Harry was wailing in his crib. She cooed to him and gathered him up in her arms. She bounced as she walked about his room, already filled with Quidditch paraphernalia. She sang to him softly and eventually he quieted down. But not a second after he finished crying there was a crash from downstairs.

Kit's heart raced in her chest. She put Harry in his crib, pressing a kiss to his forehead. "Be safe, Harry." She whispered. She could hear his voice echo through the house and his harsh laugh when James tried to attack him.

There was a horrible crack and James was silent. She could hear him coming up the steps, slowly, savouring each moment in the house. Her wand was downstairs. She was defenceless but she placed herself between the door and Harry's crib.

"Ah, Katherine."

Kit looked at him, narrowing her gaze, trying not the let the fear show through. When it was obvious she wasn't going to respond he carried on.

"You have been very difficult to find. First you disappear with your darling son. Then I track down Sirius and he doesn't know. And Remus didn't know. No one I could get my hands on knew where you had run off to. And then," he grinned, as close to a grin as he could ever get. "A man appears who says he knows exactly where you are." His dark eyes rounded on Kit.

Peter.

He had betrayed them.

"And luck would have it, he told the truth. So now the only thing that stands in my way is you."

"You're not touching him." Kit ground out.

"Katherine, you don't have die for this. You could step aside now. Come with me, I'll give you everything."

"I won't let you kill him."

"Well then I'll just have to force my way through you."

Kit held onto the crib, her knuckles white with effort. But she didn't close her eyes. She stared at him until the very last moment and that green light was racing towards her.

* * *

Below, in the ruins of the house, James slowly came to. The Dark Lord had simply tossed him aside and for a moment he was grateful. Until he realized how quiet the house was save for the frantic screams of his son.

"No," James muttered, saying the word over and over again as he raced over the ruins of his home and up the stairs. Before he saw her he knew what had happened. But seeing her there, in a heap on the floor...

He knees gave out from under him with a strangled cry. He felt his heart twist and tear in two, grief in the form of physical pain ripping at him. He made his way to her blindly, wrapping his arms around her cold body. He ran his shaking finger through her hair and held her close. He willed her to come back, to assure him that everything would be okay. He needed her back. He couldn't live without her. He couldn't...

The sound of a motorcycle ripped through the air and James could feel Sirius's hand on his shoulder.

"He just...I can't..."

"Yes, you can. James, please." Sirius was trying to move him, to take him away from Kit.

"No! I can't do it, Sirius. She was everything." James sobbed into his friend's shoulder.

"I know." Sirius held James, not letting his own tears fall. "But right now we need Dumbledore and Harry needs you."

James looked at his son, into his brown eyes and nodded slowly. James stood with Harry in his arms until Dumbledore was there with the rest of the Order.

Dumbledore spent a long time just looking at Kit, a deep sadness behind his half-moon spectacles. Then he set everything in motion. Kit was taken away and it was agreed that she would be buried at Hogwarts, somewhere safe and secluded. Harry was given to Rose and she was instructed to leave with him. Sirius would follow once loose ends were tied up.

But Sirius never made it. Having figured it out, he tracked down the man that had betrayed his family. The story made the front page of the prophet and he was sent to Askaban without trial. Rose was left to raise Harry as her own while James raved and spiralled deeper into his depression.

But that is not where this story ends. There is another tale to be told. Once that can only be told by the man who was responsible for it. Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore can tell the story of what happened after that faithful night. And the only other man who can attest to what happened is Severus Snape, who Dumbledore trusted and brought him into his office the night of her murder.

Snape felt like he couldn't walk. He had heard the news and he could feel it tearing him apart. Katherine was dead. She had been killed despite everything he had tried to do to stop it. So when Dumbledore called him back to Hogwarts, he hardly found the motivation to go. But by some miracle he stood before the Headmaster, eyes blank.

"Thank you Severus for coming. I fear that of all the people I can think of to help me in this endeavour, you are the only one who can help."

"Help with what?"

"You needn't sound so disheartened. But I warn you, what I tell you today never leaves this room. You can never repeat what you know until the time is right." Dumbledore waited for Snape's nod before continuing. "You know of the tragedy of Katherine's murder." Snape winched at the words, his fingers closing into fists as a reaction to the pain going through his chest.

"When I reached the house, in the chaos that surrounded it, I found something very peculiar. Or rather realized." Dumbledore pressed his wand to the portrait of a former Headmaster and it swung open to reveal a long passage. He led Severus down the corridor until they reached a small room.

Severus could do nothing but stare at what was lying on the table. The only indication that he responded to it was the sudden tremor that had settled in his hands. Dumbledore stepped inside the room and closed the door behind him.

The body of Katherine Potter was laid upon the table, just as she had been when she was killed. Her hair was fanned around her head like a dark halo. But she looked peaceful. That was the worst part about the Killing Curse; they always looked so peaceful. It was heartbreaking to look at her, so still, so cold.

"Why are you doing this?" Snape managed, his voice hoarse.

"Because I think we can bring her back."

Until then Snape's eyes had never left her face, but they snapped up to Dumbledore and the curiosity -no, desire- burned in his dark eyes. "How?"

* * *

**So there it is. Finished. It's a really long haul to get this finished and though I might not be happy with some of it, but I love all of it. This idea started almost a year and a half ago. I started posting this a year ago. I've never done something this long before and it feels like a true accomplishment. **

**I have to thank everyone who reviewed: **, angelsea, nina34, mattyH.5, natalie4, vhps, naples. italia. 456, naneetee, anonomys duuuhhhh1, kittykat34 (Dude, you're name is my character -I think- it made my day when I saw that), lovelynotes12, luna345, i luv odd socks , WereRanga , artsandlife , ashleyjaneli , jasminebrooke, dreamer, Twilitefan , anon, Whimsical Mist34, tudorsfan23.

**You guys have kept me writing even when I disappeared for long periods of time. It was great to have feedback from you guys and it was amazing to be added to favourite lists and alerts.**

**Thank you guys so much for this and I only hope people keep reading now that it's done. **

**But if you will check out my profile, you will see I'm not _quite_ done with Kit yet.**

**Peace. Love. Potter.**

**Dahlia**


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